crashed

By sleepymariposa

108 16 0

I write something that i can't afford to say to other people More

#190517
begin
- 18 -
diamonds from the sky
all i want
little things

dolphin

8 2 0
By sleepymariposa

Do you have a day that you don't want to do anything? 
You don't even want to walk, eat, watching television, movies or even lazy to stand up.
The only thing you do is laying down.

Doing nothing.
Laying down.
Like a dolphin stranded by the seashore on a hot day.

Your mind is full with something, but the funny thing is you don't know what are on your mind? 
Your thoughts are cloudy, blurry, kinda gray, kinda black, kinda white.

Tskk, i spit nonsense right now.

To be honest, this is me right now. I feel so tired. So exhausted and i kinda locked myself in my own room.
I feel so tired physically and might be mentally tired.

And, i feel so hungry. Angry.
Hangry.

Let me tell you more about my condition right now.

I am laying down while plugging earphone listen to my favorite songs and obviously while writing this.

I hang my legs on the headboard and im laying on my back.
Like a stranded dolphin.

I feel so bored. Then, i take my friend's advices to get rid of the bored feeling by watching movies.

I go through my Netflix account to find anything interesting to watch. I click on Tall Girl, it is fun actually but i don't have feelings to continue watch it.

Then, i click on my favourite animation movie, Tangled. Eugene and Rapunzel managed to boost my mood but still, i only watched it for like 20 minutes.

I sign in my Instagram account. I hate it even more. You know the feeling when you're feeling jealous for no reason? 

That's what i feel right now. The fact that my friends have good times while me, duh. 

But, i know. You can't believe anything you watch, you see, you listen on social medias.
Because i believe that, those people on social medias who show their best moments are actually as lonely as me.
As fucked up as me.

I scroll celebrities' accounts that i follow. Read most of the comments, like all the picture.

Yes, i sound like a stalker. But no worries, im not. I just bored.

As expected, those comment sections are full with compliments, cheesy pickup-line and hate comments.

" you are ugly "
" you are fat "
" can you please exercise ? you look like a fat panda "
" how can you be a singer?  you voice is awful. "
" you can't even sing live. "
" you are a crap dancer "

One thing across my mind is, how can you hate someone that you don't know personally?

You hate them because of something they do on stage or on camera.
You don't know how they behave behind the camera.
You don't know how they interact with their friends.

But, actually you hate them because of your inferiority complex.
You are jealous because they are pretty, handsome, talented, a good actor, a amazing singer and fantastic performer.

Nobody deserves to be hated by someone who don't know them.

Human spread peace. Human spread love. Human spread kindness.

Now, i still don't know what to do. Please help me. 

A Cole Sprouse a day, keeps the doctor away.

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