His reply stuns her. She wasn't expecting a cold reply from someone you confess your love to. "I will never regret it—I just followed my heart," She stares at his tormented eyes. "Kahit ano pa ang maging ending nito, hinding hindi ako magsisisi na sinunod ko ang puso ko. There will be no regrets. Wala akong magagawa, nagmahal ako."
He shakes his head and snorts. Alam niyang ganun ang magiging reaksyon nito kapag sinabi niya ang nasa puso niya. If she will tell all the things inside her heart, he might not be able to handle them. These emotional sentiments will be difficult for him to take.
"That is simply stupidity, Moira." He laughs sardonically and stands up to get his pants on. "Following your heart will lead nowhere," He says while buttoning ni pants. "Kaya nga nasa ilalim ng utak ang puso natin—mas ginagamit natin 'to kaysa puso," He snorts and shakes his head.
"Don't be cynical," she scolds with a laugh.
"Don't be so bloody romantic," he shoots back.
"I am a romance writer, aren't I—I am supposed to be romantic." She stands up, reaches for her robe and puts it on.
"Funny, tims. This is getting tedious," he says with a mocking grin. "Besides, fairy tales, romance and happy endings do not exist in real life."
She stares at him, winces because he is acting cool and unaffected. Alam niyang nagulat niya ang asawa sa confession niya. "Gusto mo bang marinig ang mga sinabi ng mama ko sa kanila ng daddy mo?"
"Yeah—ecstatic to hear it," he replies with a bored tone.
Kung hindi na lang kaya niya sabihin? Hayaan niyang ipagpatuloy nito ang pagiging miserable. Mahal na niya ang asawa sa kabila ng mga pinapakita nito sa kanya. Hindi niya hahayaan na malugmok ito sa ganitong estado. Gusto na niyang matapos na ang mga paghihirap nilang dalawa para makapagsimula na sila ng panibagong buhay. She is still holding on to the promise of happy ever after—with a villain instead of a prince charming.
"Sabi ni mama, nameet niya ang daddy mo sa isang party. It was love at first time for them," inumpisahan niya ang kwento. Sinabi niya rin ang mga sumunod na nangyari. Habang nagkukwento siya, nakatingin lang sa kanya si Ivo, Halata sa mga mata nito at reaksyon na hindi ito interesado sa mga sinasabi niya.
"Mas pinili ka raw daddy mo kaysa sa kanya. Iniwan niya sa ere si mama dahil mas pinagtuunan ka niya ng pansin," bumuntong hininga si Moira. "Mahal ka ng daddy mo—yan ang sinabi ni mama sa akin."
He snorts. "That is non-sense."
"You are being pigheaded to accept the fact that your dad is not cold hearted like you've been claiming all these years," she argues. "Well that's easy for you to say that he is so you can pin the blame on him for all the misery that you allowed yourself to take."
Well, that's nice that you have found your reason to defend the infamous Constantine," he counters harshly. "But—"
"I am not defending him," she interrupts. Naiinis din ako sa kanya dahil sa mga ginawa niya sa'yo. Hindi ko na siya mapapatawad doon," bumuntong hininga siya.
"Pero mas naiinis ako sa ginagawa niya ngayon sa'yo. Hanggang ngayon, minumulto ka pa din ng mga pagkakamaling ginawa niya."
"Isipin mo," Hinawakan niya ang braso nito dahil ayaw nitong pakinggan ang mga sasabihin niya. "Ivo, hindi lang isang babae ang inalis ng daddy mo sa buhay mo. Lahat ng babae na dumaan at dadaan sa buhay mo—hinayaan mong alisin niya kahit wala na siya sa mundong ito," bumitaw si Ivo sa pagkakahawak ni Moira sa kanya.
"Hindi lang isang anak mo ang pinatay niya kundi ang mga anak na dapat meron ka. Hinayaan mong nakawin niya sa'yo ang pamilya at buhay na dapat meron ka. Yung damage na ginawa niya, sa umpisa lang yun, pero, ikaw hinayaan mong sirain ka ng galit mo sa daddy mo. You are not moving on. Ivo, we moved on, we move forward. Those were all in the past," She stares at his anguished eyes.
He tries to look away, not letting his feelings to surface. "I cannot undo what he did."
"Oo nga, pero ikaw lang ang may kakayanang kalimutan ang lahat ng bangungot mo sa nakaraan. Tigilan mo na ang paghihiganti sa daddy mo. Siya ang halimaw na nilalabanan mo hanggang ngayon diyan sa isip mo—Ivo stop it," She continues. "Stop making the same mistake he did. He found the woman he loved and let her slip away and not fighting for her. He failed her as he failed you, and in the end, he also failed himself."
"Failed?" He laughs mockingly. "He succeeded at getting what he wanted. His smile fades. "He ruined my life, Moira." His face becomes serious.
"I agree with you. I hate him for that. Pero sa tingin ko, nakuha niya ang inaakala niyang gusto niya—ang isang bagay na idinikta ng ibang tao na gustuhin niya. He chose all the things that are supposed to matter over the things that really do. At the last stage, he ended up with nothing. Asaan ka noong mamatay siya?"
Tumingin sa malayo si Ivo. "Nagpakalayo-layo ako noon."
"Tignan mo? Sinuko niya ang pagmamahal niya para sa isang babae dahil mas pinaboran niya ang duties at ang pangalan ng pamilya niyo. Pero napalayo siya sa taong mahal niya at ganoon din ng nag-iisang anak niya sa kanya."
"What are you suggesting now? Look at your mother. She followed her heart, didn't she? Was she happy about it?" He asks her inquisitively.
"All right, you have your point there. Oo nga isinantabi ng daddy mo uso niya at panay utak lang ang pinaandar. Pero mas nasaktan siya sa mga nangyari," Tumingin ulit siya sa mata ni Ivo. "And for you, you have to let the love in. Forget the past, move on and love again."
He gives her a sly smile. "There is no place in my life for that," he says in a low voice. "I don't want it. I have no use for it," he averts his face from her stare. "I have learned to turn my back on it—left without looking back."
She stares at him, she can sense the tumult inside him. He is lying to himself—saying that he doesn't want love. But she can sense that he wants to love and be loved.
"Ivo," Sinubukan niyang hawakan ang mukha ng asawa pero inlayo nito ang mukha niya. "Why don't you take chance on me? Do you really have much to lose?"
He gives a harsh laugh and walks towards the door and holds the knob.
Lumapit si Moira sa kinaroroonan ng asawa. Hinawakan niya ang braso nito. "Listen to me." She needs to play her last card.
Her voice trembles with emotion. "You cannot change what happened to you in the past. You may act deaf and blind, but you can't walk away from me—I will not let you. I love you," She cups his face. "I am choosing you—I don't care about Kristoff anymore. I will be a permanent part you." She keeps staring at his eyes.
The urge to tell her the truth about the treachery of her sister and her boyfriend is overwhelming—but he didn't. He can't be the one to bring that sad news of betrayal to her. He tries to free himself from her hold but she leans towards him and captures his lips. She is melting the ice that has been covering his heart. "Don't lie to either of us that you can't open your heart to someone else—to me. You deny us both our chance at happiness. I don't have any regrets—and my conscience is clear. I haven't held anything back from you, out of pride or stubbornness." She puts her arms around him—feels the incredible tautness of his muscles as if he was turned into stone. "For once, have a strength not to walk away," she whispers in his ears. "Let me love you, Ivo."
He stands in frozen defeat. He has never been afraid to hear those words before. Turning away and leave without looking back is what he used to do before. But he can't with Moira. "There will be no perfect ending in our story. Save those illusions of happy ever after for Alex and Nicholas. I can't let you love me. I lost my heart—ten years ago," he says in cold reply. Without looking at her, he releases himself from the embrace, leaves the room and let the coldness spread through his body, filling up the region where his heart should be.
She will not give up on him. He is keeping his cold facade but she knows the ice will eventually melt. She goes back to her bed, eyes downcast. A tear falls from her eye, she will not lose faith. Despite of his coldness, she will love him no matter what. Sana lang huwag siyang mapagod.
....
Her tormented face haunts him when he closes the door behind him. He abandons his nonchalant facade a while ago that he struggled to maintain when he was talking to her. Looking at the adjoining room, he knows he hurt her again by rejecting her love. He looks at his reflection in the mirror and remembered her words about his father. She said her father failed as a father and a human being. Also, his father loved her mother? He smiles mockingly at the thought. Hindi siya makapaniwala na may kakayahang magmahal ni Constantine De la Rosa. Wala sa bokabularyo nito ang salitang yoon. His father didn't have a heart like him. Nawala ang ngiti ang sa mukha niya. He is his son after all—the exact replica of Constantine Dela Rosa.
He drags his hands through his hair and paces the floor. Iniisip niya kung lalabas siya at iinom pero nawalan na siya ng gana. Napatingin siya sa kamang iniwan ng daddy niya. Bakit ba niya naisipang higaan at matulog dito? Dapat sana pinasunog na lang niya ito noon. Kahit sunugin man ito, hindi na mabubura ang masamang alaala at mabubungongot na iniwan ng taong minsan nagmay-ari nito. He scoffs at the idea that his father chose him over a woman. Ni minsan hindi nito pinaramdam kung paano maging isang mabuting ama sa kanya. Sa paningin nito mali ang lahat ng ginagawa pati na ang mga desisyon niya. Natatawa lang siya kay Moira dahil hindi nito kilala ang daddy niya.
Biglang naalala niya na hindi pa niya nasasabi angpangtatraydor ng ate niya. Napabuga siya ng hangin. Hindi siya makahanap ng tamang tiyempo. Kapag nalaman nito na itinago niya ang balita tungkol sa pagtataksil ng ate nobyo niya, magigising na ito sa katotohanan. He is the most conniving, cold-hearted unprincipled and cold bastard alive.
Napailing siya dahil akala ng asawa niya, may pag-asa pa siyang magbago. He is beyond redemption. The idea of seducing him to fall in love is laughable. No one can tame him. He will not surrender. Keeping his guard on with her is what he must do.
He will go along her little scheme and let her realizes that her efforts are worthless. Nobody can change him. He is like the one who sired him. He is amazed that he has now a feeling towards his daddy—but it is just pure unadulterated hatred. The betrayal of Constantine and Melissande sustains his existence. It has became his shield in the battle. Minsan lamang siyang maloloko at hindi na yun mauulit muli. Sinabi sa kanya ni Moira na kailangan niya magmove on, napangisi lang siya. Kung mawawala ang galit niya, ano na lang ang matitira sa kanya?