Nyssa frowns and looks at Oliver as he walks into her apartment.
"Are you okay?" Oliver asked softly.
The brunette sighed and looked away. "How's Hayden?"
"Missing you." Oliver said.
Nodding her head, Nyssa looks down. "Can you keep her a few more nights?"
"You need to tell me what's wrong?" Oliver said.
The brunette doesn't look at him. "Please just keep her a few more nights."
Oliver sighed. "I won't agree until you talk to me."
"What do you want me to say?" Nyssa mumbles weakly.
"Tell me what's wrong." Oliver said.
The brunette finally looks up at him. "I lost my baby and the same day you and Felicity welcomed yours into the world."
"There was nothing we could have done to stop that." Oliver said. "Nature works in mysterious ways."
Nyssa instantly looks down again. "I can't do this anymore Oliver."
"Do what?" Oliver frowned.
Nyssa scratches at her arm. "I can't do this." She mumbles.
"Do what?" Oliver asked confused.
The brunette doesn't respond, scratching at her arms again.
Oliver took Nyssa's hands. "I don't understand. Explain to me what you can't do."
The brunette begins pulling her arms away, causing her sleeves to rise and reveal cuts.
"Nyssa." Oliver said.
"Let me go." Nyssa breathes out.
"Not until you tell me what you mean." Oliver said.
The brunette pulls even harder finally getting one arm free only for Oliver to see the cuts.
"Nyssa, why are you hurting yourself?" Oliver asked.
Nyssa swallows thickly before looking at him. "Please take Hayden."
"Tell me what's wrong." Oliver said.
"Please Oliver," the brunette begs.
"Fine." Oliver said.
****
Three weeks later
"Oliver, Meredith just called. Nyssa's in the er." Felicity tells Oliver after waking him up.
"What? Why?" Oliver frowned.
Felicity shrugs. "She couldn't say, Thea and Roy are on their way to watch the kids."
Oliver nodded. "Okay."
"Get dressed, I'll get some coffee." The blonde says softly.
Oliver nodded again.
Leaving the room, Felicity makes her way toward the kitchen.
Oliver got up and made his way to their room to get dressed.
It wasn't long before they made their way toward the hospital.
Felicity squeezed Oliver's hand.
The blue eyed man was struggling not to panic after what he'd seen on her wrists three weeks ago.
"She'll get help. She'll be okay. She has the best doctors looking after her." Felicity said.
Sighing, Oliver looks over at her. "I don't know what's going on or how she's hurt."
"We'll find out." Felicity said.
Nodding his head, Oliver follows her to the front counter.
"We are looking for Nyssa..." Felicity began then she realised she didn't know Nyssa's last name. She looked at Oliver. "What's her last name?"
"Raatko." Oliver says instantly.
Felicity nodded, she looked at the nurse. "We are looking for Nyssa Raatko's room."
Nodding her head, the nurse begins typing on the computer.
Felicity looked at Oliver. "Are you okay?"
The blue eyed man swallowed thickly. "I love her."
Felicity stared at Oliver. She swallowed, not sure what to say.
"I-I wanted to tell you." Oliver tells her calmly.
Felicity sighed. "We'll talk about it later. You should make sure she's alright."
The nurse told them the room Nyssa was in.
Oliver instantly makes his way toward the room.
Felicity moved to sit in the waiting room.
Nyssa was sound asleep in her hospital bed.
Oliver moves to sit on one of the chairs beside the bed.
Shifting, Nyssa releases a soft groan.
Oliver didn't say anything. He just watched her.
Lexie, who was on Meredith's service, entered the room to check Nyssa's vitals.
"Do you know what happened?" Oliver asks, looking up at her.
Lexie looked up at Oliver. She gently lifted Nyssa's hand up off the bed without waking her. She showed Oliver the cuts on Nyssa's arms. "She almost killed herself."
Closing his eyes, Oliver takes a deep breath. "I should've been there for her more."
"You couldn't have stopped her. No one could have. No one was able to stop me." Lexie shrugged. She checked Nyssa's vitals and wrote them down on her chart.
"If I had been with her when she needed me, then I could've helped her." Oliver mumbles, watching the brunette sleep.
Lexie put the chart down. "You couldn't have helped her. She didn't want your help."
"But she needed me and I wasn't there." Oliver mumbles.
"You weren't there because you were with your wife who needed you. She's just had your baby and you're here worrying about your partner." Lexie said. "You couldn't have done anything anyway."
Oliver frowns and looks up at her. "Does Arizona know what happened?" he asks, not knowing that Lexie and Arizona had gotten into an argument over Nyssa.
Lexie nodded, gritting her teeth and swallowing. She blinked her tears away.
Oliver's frown deepens. "Are you okay?"
"I'm fine." Lexie said. "I have work to do." She moved to leave.
Oliver sighs and turns his attention back toward Nyssa.
Nyssa slept soundly on the bed.
Shifting, Oliver reaches up to push a strand of hair from Nyssa's cheek.
Nyssa remained asleep, breathing in time with the heart rate monitor.
Shifting closer, Oliver slides his hand down to caress her cheek.
Oliver swore Nyssa leaned into his touch, but maybe he was imagining it.
Swallowing thickly, he leans down and gently kisses her just as the door opens.
Oliver pulled away and turned to see who was at the door.
Felicity clears her throat and slowly walks in. "I didn't mean to interrupt."
"You didn't interrupt." Oliver said.
"How is she?" Felicity asked, stepping up beside Oliver.
The blue eyed man sighs. "She tried to kill herself."
Felicity's expression changed from one of slight jealousy to concern.
"This is my fault. I should've been around her after we lost the baby." Oliver says softly.
Felicity shook her head. "It's not your fault. It's my fault. I went into labor the day she had her miscarriage. I stopped you two from being together." She said, she looked down at her hands. "She loves you. You love her more than you love me. I'm stopping you from being with each other." She sniffed.
Oliver tenses and instantly stands up, moving toward her. "No, don't think like that."
"It's the truth." Felicity said, not looking at him. "We were great together in high school, in college, even after we got married, we didn't have any issues. Then you took the job as a cop and got partnered with Nyssa and I'm standing in your way. You fell in love with her and out of love with me." She mumbled.
Shaking his head, Oliver moves even closer. "I am still in love with you Felicity."
Felicity found it hard to believe. "But you love her more. We wouldn't be here if you didn't. We'd be at home with William and Valerie." She said quietly, so quietly that Oliver almost didn't hear her.
Lifting her head, Oliver leans in and connects their lips.
Felicity's eyes fluttered closed.
After a moment, Oliver pulls away. "I love you, the sparks in our kiss are there."
Felicity opened her eyes and looked into Oliver's.
"Yes I love Nyssa, but that doesn't mean I don't love you." He tells her.
"I just don't understand how you can be in love with two people at the same time." Felicity said.
Oliver sighs. "I don't know, it just happened."
Felicity held back tears. She curled into him and buried her head on his shoulder.
Wrapping his arms around her, Oliver kisses the top of her head and holds her close.
Felicity closed her eyes and took a long shaky breath.
A soft groan from the hospital bed catches their attention.
Felicity pulled back from Oliver."I'll go get a nurse." She mumbled and left.
Moving over to the bed, Oliver grabs one of Nyssa's hands.
Nyssa groaned again.
"Nys." Oliver breathes out softly.
Felicity returned with a nurse.
Nyssa's eyes slowly fluttered open.
The nurse moved into the room and paged Nyssa's doctor.
It wasn't long before Meredith and Lexie both walked into the room.
"Hey." Meredith said softly.
Nyssa swallows thickly and clears her throat. "Hi."
"How do you feel?" Meredith asked.
The brunette shrugs.
"That's not an answer." Meredith said.
Nyssa just stares at her.
"How do you feel?" Meredith asked. "Are you in pain?"
Again, Nyssa just stares at her.
"I need you to talk to me or to someone before I can help you." Meredith said.
The brunette frowns and looks away.
Meredith sighed.
Oliver sighs. "Let me try talking to her."
Meredith nodded. "Okay." She glanced at Felicity. "Let's give them a moment."
Felicity frowns and looks down before following Meredith and Lexie.
Oliver looked at Nyssa. "Talk to me."
"There's nothing to talk about." Nyssa mumbles.
"You have to tell me something." Oliver said. "Or Meredith won't let you out."
Nyssa finally looks at him. "Why does it matter?"
"Because I care about you and I'm worried about you." Oliver said.
"Shouldn't you be with your wife?" The brunette asks in response.
"She understands that I need to make sure that you, the mother of my daughter, are alright." Oliver said.
Nyssa looks away from him. "That's all I am."
"I'm worried about you." Oliver said.
The brunette closes her eyes. "Don't."
"What?" Oliver frowned.
"Don't act like you care when you don't love me." Nyssa responds.
Oliver sighed.
Felicity knocked on the door and came in. "Let me try."
Rolling her eyes, Nyssa lays back down and looks away.
Oliver got up and moved over to Felicity. He kissed her head and left the room.
"Nyssa, you have to talk to someone about what's going on." Felicity said, moving over to the bed.
The brunette just scoffs. "Why do you care?"
Felicity sat down on the chair. "Because for some reason Oliver does." She sighed. "And now we are sitting here trying to get you to talk when we should be at home with our kids."
"Then go, take everything and go. My daughter, Oliver, everything." Nyssa snaps out, she was tired of being everyone's last choice.
"I don't want to take your daughter!" Felicity said. "I just want to understand what Oliver sees in you."
Nyssa sits up and rips the iv from her arm, moving to climb out of the bed before heading into the bathroom and locking the door.
"Shit." Felicity muttered. She got up off the chair and moved to the door. "You do realise I have a key to the bathroom? I work here."
Nyssa doesn't respond, just as the glass breaks in the bathroom.
Felicity pulled her keycard from her pocket and found the key to the bathroom. She unlocked the door and pushed it open.
Nyssa was sitting on the floor of the shower, blood already running down her arm.
"Nyssa." Felicity rushed forward and pulled the glass out of Nyssa's hand. She paged a nurse.
Nyssa closes her eyes.
"Nyssa." Felicity pulled Nyssa into her arms. "I'm sorry."
The brunette doesn't respond, having cut deep enough that her arm was gushing blood.
Felicity grabbed a cloth off the counter and held it onto Nyssa's cut to try and stop the bleeding.
A nurse appears and stops in the doorway. "I need to get Doctor Grey."
"Hurry." Felicity said. She bit her lower lip roughly, feeling guilty and wondering what Oliver was going to say to her.
The nurse nods and quickly disappears.
"Nyssa, please stop doing this." Felicity begged.
The brunette was softly sobbing as she tried to pull away.
"Stop." Felicity said.
"Leave me alone." The brunette pleads, trying to pull away.
"No." Felicity didn't let Nyssa go. She kept her arms around her.
After a few minutes Nyssa grows limp in Felicity's arms.
"Nyssa?" Felicity frowned.
The brunette doesn't respond.
"Nyssa?" Felicity repeated.
Still no response just as Meredith rushes in.
"Meredith, help!" Felicity said, she was still holding Nyssa and the cloth to Nyssa's arm.
"What happened?" Meredith asks, dropping down beside them and checking for a pulse. "She has a pulse, it's faint but it's there."
"I said something stupid and she got upset. She ran in here, smashed the mirror and cut herself. This is my fault. She's in this mess because I won't let Oliver be with her." Felicity said. She didn't even notice that she had some small shards of glass in her knee from when she dropped down onto the floor beside Nyssa.
"It's not your fault." Meredith responds immediately.
"Everyone keeps saying that but it is." Felicity said.
Meredith shakes her head. "No it's not."
"Forget about me. She needs help." Felicity said. She knew Oliver would blame her for this.
Meredith looks toward the nurse. "Page cardio."
Felicity reached for her pager to page cardio.
The nurse was doing the same thing.
Meredith and Felicity then moved Nyssa onto the bed.
The brunette was still unconscious.
Meredith put Nyssa's IV back in her arm. "You should get your knee looked at."
"My knee is fine." Felicity muttered.
Teddy appeared in the room.
"You're bleeding." Meredith responds just as Oliver walks into the room.
"What happened?" He asks instantly, seeing all the blood.
"He took the words right out of my mouth." Teddy said, entering the room and moving over to the bed.
Meredith is quick to explain so that Felicity can't blame herself.
"It was my fault." Felicity muttered, ignoring the stinging she could now feel in her knees.
Oliver frowns and moves over to her. "What?"
"It was my fault." Felicity repeated. "You're going to say it anyway so I just thought I'd say it first."
Oliver's frown deepens. "It's not your fault."
Felicity blinked her tears away. "I said something I shouldn't have and she ran into the bathroom and cut herself."
Stepping closer, Oliver cups her cheek and looks into her eyes. "It's not your fault." He repeats.
Felicity couldn't look him in the eye. She shook her head.
Leaning their foreheads together, Oliver sighs softly. "You're not to blame."
Felicity shook her head.
"Lexie, can you take Felicity to get her knee seen too in the ER please." Meredith asked, seeing the look on Lexie's face, like she was remembering how she was in this situation.
"My knee is fine." Felicity muttered.
"Go get it looked at." Oliver tells her softly.
"I'm fine." Felicity said.
"Please just go." Oliver says softly.
"I'm fine." Felicity repeated.
Oliver doesn't respond, turning her so she can see Lexie. "Go get checked."
"Come on." Lexie said, taking Felicity's hand.
Felicity reluctantly limped behind Lexie out of the room.
****
Arizona sighs as she looks up from her case file and sees Lexie. "What is it?" she asks, still slightly upset.
"Felicity won't let me look at her knee." Lexie said. "I need your help."
Nodding her head, Arizona closes the file and hands it to the nurse.
"She's in the ER, or was when I left her," Lexie said.
Nodding her head once more, Arizona moves to walk past her.
Lexie grabbed Arizona's hand. "Can we fix us before we treat Felicity. She doesn't need our tension, she's pretty fragile right now. She blames herself for what happened to Nyssa."
The blonde closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. "We're at work."
"So?" Lexie said. "I want to fix us."
"Not at work." Arizona responds before pulling her hand away and walking off.
Lexie sighed and followed Arizona to the ER where they found Felicity quietly crying on one of the beds into a pillow.
Arizona moves up to her and grabs her hand. "Hey, let me clean your knee.
Felicity shook her head.
"Yes, would you like Valerie to see you like this?" Arizona asks.
Felicity muffled a sob with the pillow.
"Let me clean your knee." Arizona says softly.
Felicity shook her head again.
"Dammit Felicity, you're not to blame for anything anyone else does." Arizona snaps out.
"She did that to herself because I wouldn't let Oliver be with her." Felicity snapped back.
Arizona rolls her eyes. "Get over it." The blonde doctor responds, moving to clean Felicity's knee.
Felicity rolled away so that Arizona couldn't reach her knee.
"Aren't you an adult? Act like it." Arizona snaps, she was having a rough day.
"Arizona, she doesn't need you snapping at her. You're her friend. Act like it." Lexie said. She moved around the bed. "Doctor Smoak, you knee will get infected if we don't remove the glass."
"Let it get infected." Felicity muttered.
"You could try sedating her." Doctor Webber called from across the room.
Felicity rolled her eyes. "No."
Arizona rolls her eyes and walks off before coming back with a needle.
"Arizona, isn't that a bit harsh." Lexie said.
The blonde ignores her, catching Felicity off guard and sticking her with the needle.
"Ouch." Felicity whimpered. She sobbed quietly until the sedative took over and she drifted off to sleep.
Arizona gets rid of the needle and looks at Lexie. "There." She mumbled before walking off.
Lexie rolled her eyes and began gently pulling the glass out of Felicity's knee. "This isn't your fault." She said softly.
****
Nyssa slowly woke up and looked at Oliver who hadn't left her bedside.
"Hey." Oliver said.
"Why are you still here?" Nyssa asks weakly.
"Because I care." Oliver said.
The brunette closes her eyes and swallows thickly.
"Why are you so determined to kill yourself?" Oliver asked.
"So you'll be free." Nyssa mumbles.
"I don't want you to kill yourself." Oliver said.
Nyssa looks away. "You don't want me."
Oliver sighed. "Stop acting like a child. I'm married and I love my wife."
Forcing a laugh, Nyssa sits up. "Leave."
"No." Oliver said.
"Get out." Nyssa begs, she couldn't handle him pretending to care not after what he had just said.
Oliver leaned back in the chair.
Rolling onto her side, Nyssa stares at the wall.
Oliver rolled his eyes but didn't leave.
"Can you shut the door and turn off the lights?" Nyssa finally asks.
Oliver got up and shut the door before turning off the lights and returning to his seat.
Closing her eyes, Nyssa takes a slow deep breath. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." Oliver said.
After a few minutes, Nyssa begins shifting on the bed, trying to get comfortable.
Oliver ran his fingers through his hair
The brunette was still shifting uncomfortably.
Oliver got up and stood beside the bed. He gently placed his hand on her arm. "What can I do to make you more comfortable?"
Nyssa slowly sits up and pats the bed behind her.
Oliver climbed onto the bed beside her.
The brunette instantly leans back between his legs, her head on his chest.
Oliver played with her hair.
Lexie knocked quietly on the door. "Oliver, I just wanted to let you know we had to sedate Felicity to clean her knee. She wouldn't let us touch her otherwise."
"Thank you." Oliver whispered.
Lexie left.
Nyssa shifts against him and slowly relaxes.
Oliver sighed.
Shifting again, Nyssa moves onto her stomach as she lays between his legs.
Oliver rubbed his head.
Burying her face in his chest, Nyssa shifts against him, not meaning to rub against him.
Oliver swallowed, his breath caught in his throat.
The brunette shifts again, trying to get into a comfortable position.
"Shh." Oliver rubbed her back gently.
Nyssa continued to shift, occasionally pushing against him.
"Nyssa, lie still." Oliver said softly.
Nyssa doesn't respond, shifting again as she feels Oliver hardening.
"Nyssa, stop moving." Oliver said.
Biting her lip, Nyssa continues shifting. She wanted Oliver to fuck her fast and hard.
"Nyssa, you need rest." Oliver said.
The brunette shifts one last time and sighs.
Oliver gently rubbed her back.
Nyssa was slightly disappointed that he didn't try to have sex with her.
Oliver began singing softly.
After a few minutes, the brunette was sound asleep.
Oliver kissed the top of her head.
A tired yawn escapes Nyssa.
Oliver continued to sing softly.