I woke up with sore eyes and a hungry stomach. According to my phone, it was seven at night and I had multiple new texts and calls. No doubt, Jackson told Libby what had happened, which explains why I have so many messages from her. I turned off my phone before standing up, completely exhausted. With a second thought, I sat back down with my back aching due to a two hour nap on the closet floor.
I wanted food, but every bone in my body ached from the bone crushing sobs I’d gone through before I was able to fall asleep.
I just sat up and leaned against the wall of my closet while clinging Boyce close to me. I don’t know why just the mention of my mom brings me to a breakdown. She died when I was little, but it was all my fault. Maybe it’s the guilt that kills me every time somebody brings her up. Because I practically killed her.
And then the fact that I had a fight with Jackson didn’t really make my mood any better. I absolutely hated fighting with him, we never fight. Ever.
I jumped when I heard a grunt coming from outside my balcony and then the glass door sliding open. I looked up to see Ryder stumbling into the closet and scanning the room to find me.
“Did you climb up here?” I asked incredulously.
He smiled at me and moved to sit beside me, but keeping his distance. “Yep.” He chirped.
“W-why?” I croaked, making sure that my face was clear from any evidence of crying, even though I was sure my red eyes were a clear give away.
“Well, Jackson told us about what happened.”
“So?” I mumbled. "We had a fight, that's what siblings do."
"Not you two. Normal siblings, like me, Kale, and Andy, yeah. We fight. But you and Jackson aren't normal brother and sister. You're a lot closer than most families and I'm sure a lot of people are jealous of that. Maybe even me just a little bit. And I know that you two will work this out easily, but I also know that this is hard for you." He spoke softly.
"Why you?" I asked, not meeting his intense gaze.
“You see, Jackson also said that you need your time to cool off. Kale respects that, but I’m not as patient.” He explained. “Holly, Kale really likes you, it’s pretty damn obvious. He really cares about you, so being the older brother, I have to care about you too.”
I rolled my eyes. “So touching.” I muttered sarcastically.
“I know.” He said with a small smirk. “So let’s go get dinner then.”
“I’m not going out there.” I snapped. “I don’t want to.”
“Well, everybody’s worried about you and Jackson feels bad and Kale’s worried. They’re all a mess, really.” He told me.
“I look stupid.” I mumbled.
“Nobody cares what you look like. They just want to make sure you’re okay.” He paused for a minute and grabbed my hand, helping me up to my feet. “Are you okay?”
I shrugged. “I guess I don’t really have a choice.”
What Ryder did next really surprised me. I didn't see it coming at all.
He hugged me tightly.
I laid my head on his chest and sucked up the tears threatening to come out when I realized that I needed to stop crying. It didn’t matter how I felt, the people around me were worried. I put a smile on my face and hoped that it shined to my eyes as I looked up at Ryder.
“Thanks.” I whispered. No denying it, his hug did make me feel a lot better.
He nodded and gently kissed my forehead before leading me to the closet door and smoothly unlocking it.
“You go on downstairs, I’m going to get dressed.” I told him, seeing as how I was still wearing Kale’s shirt and my basketball shorts.
“I’m waiting outside this door and I’m not closing it all the way so you can’t lock it.” He told me sternly as he walked out of the room and closed the door, making sure it was still cracked open an inch.
“Don’t look.” I huffed. I had to admit, it felt good to know that Ryder cared that much about me not staying cooped up in my room for the rest of my life, which felt very satisfying at the moment.
I got dressed in long denim shorts with a red knit sweater that I brought from home. It still smelled a little bit like my home in Minnesota. It was long sleeved and warm, but I didn’t plan on going outside so it was perfect for the lasting effects of my pity party. I managed to cover my red eyes with a layer of eyeliner and mascara.
“Done.” I chirped, swinging the door open to see that Ryder kept his word and was standing right outside the door with his back turned to the crack. He turned to me and smiled.
“Good.” He chirped as we walked down the stairs and into the kitchen where it looked like we were throwing a party with how many people were there.
This including Kale, Isaac, Elle, Jarrod, Andy, Tommy, Jackson, and Ryder.
“What’s up with the party?” I asked, confused as I instinctively made my way to Kale’s side.
He immediately wrapped his arms around me tightly, sending my heart into overdrive and all of the mad feelings I still had were slowly easing away. I was beginning to feel like myself again, just because of Kale’s warm hug. It was magical. He was magical.
“We were worried about you.” He murmured.
“Doesn’t everybody lock themselves in a closet to take a nap every once in a while?” I joke.
“Only you, Holly.” He joked back, pulling away from me. I waved a hello to all of his friends before I was being engulfed in another bone crushing hug, this one coming from Andy.
“Holy crap, you guys. I didn’t fall off a cliff or anything. I’m fine.” I chuckled.
“But we were so worried.” Andy mumbled, reluctantly pulled away.
“Why?”
“Because I know how bad your meltdowns can be, Holly.” Jackson said from across the kitchen, not even making a move to bring me into a hug.
“It wasn’t a meltdown, you make it sound like I’m a crazy person.” I mumbled, but I knew what he was talking about. Before he left, if somebody mentioned my mom, I’d go into a depression for days at end. It was miserable, but here, with Kale and Ryder and all of these people that care about me (by force or not), I can genuinely say that I felt a lot better.
“Well, we are taking you out for dinner.” Andy chirped, wrapping her arm around my shoulders.
I sighed, knowing that there was no arguing with a room full of stubborn people. “You guys totally overreacted.” I mumbled.
“Who cares, they got the big limo.” Elle squealed.
I chuckled and rolled my eyes, clutching Kale’s hand in mine as the group filed out through the living room and then out the front door.
“It’s good to know that you use me for our limos.” Kale teased.
“Oh, you know that’s the only reason we’re friends.” Elle teased back sarcastically.
“Yeah, dude. Limos and total celebrity status.” Jarrod grinned.
“That’s really all your good for.” I joked, poking Kale in the ribs.
He playfully glared at me. “Great. Now you guys turned my own girlfriend against me.” He mumbled as we all got into the limo. I ended up sitting between Kale and Andy on the way to wherever we were going.
Everybody laughed and the mood in the air was light, but I did notice that Jackson was sitting on the other side of the limo and looking out the window, avoiding me. That hurt, like, a lot, but I tried to stay engaged in the conversation with Kale and his friends as much as possible. He was probably still upset about our fight.
“Holly, it’s so cool that Kale finally has a girlfriend. We can totally double date, finally.” Elle gushed.
“Triple.” Andy sang from the other side of me.
Elle laughed and her red hair bounced around her face. “Of course. It will be so much fun.”
I smiled. “Sounds great.” I chirped, leaning my head on Kale’s warm shoulder.
When the limo stopped, we were in front of some casual Chinese restaurant. This had to of been Jackson’s choice, since he knows that Chinese is my favorite.
“Oh! Chinese, my fave!” Elle sang. It was almost creepy how much alike we are.
The waiter gave us a table immediately, despite our large party and I couldn’t help but think it was because of Ryder, Jackson, and Tommy were with us. Stupid celebrities.
Before we got to the table, though, I pulled Jackson aside roughly by his sleeve so that we were apart from everybody else.
“Jackson what is wrong?” I hissed.
“W-what do you mean?” He asked awkwardly, not meeting my gaze.
“I mean you’ve been avoiding me like a damn virus.” I snapped in a hushed voice. “If it’s because of the fight, I’ve moved on. I’m fine, okay?”
“Holly, do you even remember what would happen when you did this a few years ago?” He shot back. “Do you remember how bad it was?”
“Apparently not.” I mumbled.
“Well, it wasn’t for just a few hours or a few days. You’d do this crap for weeks, Holly. Like when you’d pass out from how long you were crying. ” He continued. “Or when you would starve yourself or throw up or-“
“Okay.” I snapped. “I get it.”
“That’s why I was so worried.” He said. “That’s why I still feel incredibly guilty for being such a dick. I was mad, but that doesn’t mean I should have brought her up. I’m really sorry, Holly.”
“Look, it’s not that bad anymore.” I assured him. “Especially with you and Kale and Ryder and Andy. I’m way better now, okay? Let’s just forget about it.”
He forced a small smile and leaned in, kissing my forehead softly. “If you’re sure that you’re okay.”
I smiled back and dragged him forward to where everybody else was sitting at the large round table. “I’m sure, big brother.”
We sat down and I was between Kale and Jackson with a big smile on my face, happy to make up with Jackson.
Things were perfect again.
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The girl to the side, is Molly C Quinn (who plays Elle) :P
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