Chapter 10
"Mr. Miller, you are temporarily blind. That does not excuse the stupid things you just uttered to me. First of all, I did not volunteer nor asked to be placed in this position. But that little girl upstairs clung to me for dear life. I was not about to break her heart. I don't know why, but she inspired sadness and loneliness. I not once ever fathomed being your anything. I was here for the child. But seeing as her arrogant father is back and seems to be healthy and mouthy. I bid you gentlemen goodbye."
Once done with but a fraction of what I really wanted to tell this asshole I got up and walked to the door. Then turned around "she still needs the interaction she is receiving at the daycare. I recommend you still send her. But that is your choice, but it is what's good for the child. It does not have to be my daycare. Any one will do." I opened the door and walked out after glaring at Lance and Randal.
If they would have said anything in his defense, today would have been the last time Lance would lay eyes on me. I huffed all the way to my car. "Bitch, I should have shown him what a bitch I was. I should have clawed his eyes out. It's not like they work anyway." I said to myself as I got in the car and slammed the door.
Joshua's POV
I sat back as the fire ball blasted me in that serious teacher's voice. All I was doing as she talked was picture some school librarian looking woman with a bun and glasses. She must be old and lacking in everything. I still can't believe she tried to use my daughter to get to me. Once I heard the door slam shut. I raked my fingers through my hair. "Well it seems like our little kitty, had claws." I said dryly.
"Joshua, that was uncalled for. We raised you better than that." Dad told me, but I didn't care.
"Boy you are going to have to do some serious ass kissing. When you see how much little Rose is attached to Miranda. I don't know what she did but that girl is just flourishing. With all the attention Miranda has given her. She was also right about not wanting the job. She would have rather shot her foot off than take this job. Randal and I had to practically beg before she took it." Lance said, I just snorted. Yeah right, just a ploy of hers.
I stayed quiet not ready to be swayed by their words. When dinner time rolled around, I was led to the table by mom. Rose chatted about her school and even sang a hello song that they sing when they arrive at the day care. It was like I was received by a different girl. A full blown chatter box, asking why for everything. Why did I have a bandage on my eyes? Why was I gone so long? Where was Miranda? When was she coming back? Why didn't I eat my carrots? Because Miranda said they are good for the eyes.
I can honestly say that if I heard that name again, I was going to scream. Lance left after dinner and dad and mom where going to sleep over. It was time for Rose's bath but I felt helpless and not able to help at all. During that entire stay at the hospital, I was so sure all would be fine. I was so sure I had everything in the house memorized. That I would be able to get around alone. But damn it all to hell if I didn't trip twice and fall once.
I felt helpless and angry. But I would be damned if I let mother take me a fucking bath. Dad helped me to the bathroom and kind of let me feel around. "Ok Joshua, take 5 steps forward. That puts you at the door to the bathroom. Now count 7 steps in and turn right. Hold your hand out and down and you will find the bench seat. There you can sit and take your clothes off. Once you are ready take 10 steps to the left and turn half way to the right. Hold out your hand and you will feel the shower door. Once inside, hot water is to your left, cold to your right." Dad said.
I followed his directions to a tee. I was so happy when I reached my destination. Thank heavens for the little accomplishments, I gloated to myself. "Once you are done. Open the door and reach left. Go as far as you can reach without falling. Your towel will be hanging there. Then just retrace your steps to the bench. Your PJ's will be waiting there."
"Thanks old man. You have no idea what this means to me." I said smiling all happy. I then started at the door and followed the directions. Once inside the shower and after I had my cast wrapped in plastic so it would not get wet. I showered and washed myself. I could not get the scolding that woman had given me, out of my head. Maybe I was a jerk by saying what I said. I mean, she didn't even know me or anything. I'm just so pissed off with this whole situation. It was then that I dropped the soap.
"Fucking great" I muttered. My leg with the cast was half out the shower door. I'm sure there is water everywhere, but hell if I will ask for help. I squirted shampoo into my palm and used that as soap. I shrugged it was the same difference. Plus it's not like I can bend down without hurting my ribs. Which they were killing me, since my wrap was off.
Once bathed and ready for bed. I felt my side dip a little. "Princess is that you?" I whispered softly.
"Daddy, I love mommy. I go to school?" was her question. I wasn't sure how I felt about her going off to day care. But she was talking a hell of a lot more now. So I guess there is something that woman must be doing right.
"Rose, you do know she's not your mommy right?" I asked as gentle as possible. The last thing I wanted was to upset her.
I felt her little hands frame my face. "Daddy has no more eyes?" She asked and I hugged her to me. Such a little thing, it hurt me to think about her worried about me.
"Daddy still has his eyes sweetie" I said as I reached over to the night light. A child of her age cannot understand unless she see's. I remember reading that in one of the parenting books. So I sat up and unwound my bandage. "See daddy's eyes are still there. I will see your lovely little face soon enough." I could hear her breath but could not fathom what her little brain might be thinking.
She once again framed my face with her little hands and I felt her feather light kiss on each of my eyes lids. "Mommy Miranda kisses my booboo. It was better. Your eyes better now daddy?" my heart swelled with all the love I had for this little girl. I had to hold her to me so I could wipe at the tears that escaped my eyes as I shut them tightly. Oh lord please let me be able to see my daughter again. It was then that I opened my eyes and I saw the first flash of color. It was blue and swirly. But it was the best thing ever and it filled me with hope.
"Rose you do know Miranda is not your mommy right?" I had to make sure my daughter would not get hurt.
"Yes daddy, she nice to me. My mommy no love Rose. I want Miranda be my mommy. She sad like me and I like her." Well what the hell do I say to that?
"Well my little princess, get to bed or no school tomorrow." I heard her squeal as she jumped of the bed and I presume ran to her room. Judging from all the noise she made. But I was not alone long before I heard a voice.
"You know you will have to actually let her go in the morning." Dad said, I sighed and ran my fingers over the stubble on my chin. "I can drop her off when I go to work. I'm sure Miranda can bring her back, as she has been doing and get lunch for her."
"Why? Mom can get lunch." I say getting upset. I did not want that woman in Roses life anymore than she has to be.
"I think all those sleepless night in the hospital with you has made your mother ill. I will come and take her to the doctor at noon. Rose will come home by 12:30. After feeding her Miranda can leave, she won't be her but half an hour. We shall be back by then." He left before I could say another word. Oh how I hated to rely on people and not be able to do for myself.
..
The next day went like clockwork. By the time I woke up Rose had already gone to the daycare. Mother did sound like her voice was raspy and she said she had chills and her body hurt. It figures the hospital would make her sick. I was helped to the living room and was awaiting the arrival of my princes. I never noticed how lonely it feels when no one is here. I can't even read or anything.
I heard the lock at the door. I had fallen asleep I guess. It must be dad I thought. But I heard Rose's laughter along with that woman. What the hell, she has keys to the house. Then it dawned on me. She came in yesterday on her own also. I felt a hand on my arm. "Daddy look, I painted today." Rose said all excited. I took the paper she put in my hand.
"Rose, go wash your hands while I get lunch started." Miranda told her and I felt a kiss on my cheek. "I be back" she said and I heard her retreating footsteps.
"She handed you a picture they did today. We took a nature walk and it is the outline of a maple leaf. Since autumn is here. The trees by my daycare are turning colors. She picked up a yellowing one from the ground and painted her leaf yellow." Miranda said just as Rose came back.
"You like it daddy?" She sounded so excited.
"Yes princess, it is a beautiful shade of yellow." I said trying to picture it.
"I will go get started on lunch, while you tell your daddy about all the things you did today at school." I hear Miranda tell her. I could hear her retreating foot steppes as Rose chatters on about her day. Why is she being nice to me, after the way I treated her.
Miranda's POV
My heart was aching as I saw that little girls face shine with so much love for her father. It just brought back all the times I wished my own father would show up. As I made lunch I allowed myself to grieve for that little girl from so long ago. For all those birthday wishes lost on wanting my dad to come home. On wanting to finally meet him.
I wiped my eyes as I walked over to call Rose to the table. "Mr. Miller, can I help you to the table? It would do your daughter so much good to have you sitting with her while she eats." I said to him. Because there was no way I was going to cook for the ass. He can starve for all I care.
He looked towards to me as he followed my voice. "Do you mind?" He asked my brain stopped my mouth from blurting out. 'Yes I mind you stupid jerk.' But I was doing this for Rose, not for him. So I just reached out my hand and put it under his elbow and helped him up and to the table. Damn ox weighed a ton.
"Well I will leave you to your lunch" I said as I walked over to pick up my bag.
"You're not staying?" He asked. I'm glad he was blind because my, are you fucking kidding me look would have surely earned me a dirty look back.
"No" was all I said through gritted teeth.
"Look Miranda, I am so sorry for my less than grateful behavior yesterday. I seem to be lashing out at everyone. You didn't deserve that. But my parents aren't here and I don't think it will be safe to leave me here with Rose." So an apology followed by what he really needed. Does he think I'm stupid? It was then that rose giggled. "What's so funny Puppet?"
"Mommy's angry face." Rose said. Then Joshua turned to where I was standing and damn if his eyebrow didn't rise from the bandage. In what I could only describe as a smirk, by the twitch of his lip.
"I take it I am not forgiven?" he asked.
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Eat crow Joshua :P