Nothing To Lose

By xoxoharuhiko

229K 9.5K 1.2K

Beam was broken and in more ways than one so was Forth. Can love triumph against pain this time? BOOK 3 - NOT... More

1 - we breakdown a little
2 - death by a thousand cuts
3 - when the feeling sinks in
4 - and all the pieces fall
5 - this is me letting go
TEASER
6 - it hurts like hell
7 - soon you'll get better
8 - hang up and give up
9 - you're a full on rainstorm
10 - dreams and warm conversation
11 - remember us this way
12 - wish I was good enough
13 - hold me while you wait
14 - if our love is wrong
15 - im a little unsteady
16 - lights will guide you home
17 - all of the stars
18 - these are hard feelings
19 - dance with the truth
20 - call it what you want
21 - give me all of you
TEASER - Chapter 22 - heavenly way to die
22 - heavenly way to die
23 - you love me most
24 - darling everything is on fire
25 - we got lost in translation
26 - running through rose thorns
TEASER - FINALE
27 - somewhere only we know
FINALE
EPILOGUE
AUTHOR
+ bonus chapter

PROLOGUE

14.1K 322 18
By xoxoharuhiko

Beam went outside of the manor.

The sight took his breath away. A field of grape vines from afar greeted his eyes. It was cold and yet the warmth of the sun was touching his skin. It was a beautiful day.

A small group of people gathered near the winery. An old italian was playing a guitar while everyone else was singing some song that he had never heard before.

As he walks closer to them he can see Kit and Mingkit, both were barefooted, stomping on grapes in a wide wooden basin. He waved at them.

Ming was sitting with the other guys and singing along, just watching his son and husband have fun.

"P'Beam! Have a seat. Coffee?" Ming didn't wait for him to respond and he handed him a steamy cup of brewed coffee.

"Thanks Ming." He sat beside Ming and watched the two laugh and play around on the wooden basin filled with grapes.

Beam took a deep breath. Yards and yards away he can only see grape vines, coffee and tea fields. It was peaceful, he can see why Kit liked it here.

"Beam! Come here and join us!" Kit suggested as soon as he saw him.

"No.. I can't. Have fun Kitty." He answered.

"P'Beam you should join them. There's the water. You can wash there." Ming pointed near where Kit was stomping on grapes.

"I'll try." Beam went ahead and washed his feet thoroughly.

"Beam! Come on." Kit called out excitedly.

Beam had never seen Kit this happy. He really was in a good place with Ming. Their marriage was something could only dream of.

He smiled at Kit. The group of men cheered them on when he finally entered the pit.

On his first step he can feel the grapes exploding beneath him. It weirded him out at first but soon enough he got the hang of it. He ran around the small space chasing Kit and the little kid.

They were laughing and having fun. Beam had forgotten that feeling and for a while even just for a few minutes, he had also forgotten everything that happened back home.

"Baby! Brunch is ready on the patio." Ming shouted out from the manor.

"We'll be there!" Kit shouted back with a wave.

"Beam let's go. We shouldn't keep Ming waiting or he'll end up eating everything just to spite us." Kit jokingly said.

As they were having their meal out in the field overlooking the breathtaking view, Beam can't help but observe his friends. Ming was taking good care of his family, his Kit and his son. It was obvious that Ming loves Kit very much. Ming was a good husband, he would never lay a hand on Kit.

Beam felt his eyes get teary.

"Beam?" Kit called his attention.

"Sorry." Beam wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.

Kit could only look at him with worry.

"Will come with me later and help me?" Kit asked, having thought of an idea to cheer Beam up.

Beam nodded.

"Yeah.. Yeah I'd love to."

After brunch, Kit drove a cart with him past the coffee field. The aroma was unbelievably fragrant as they passed by. Kit explained that the barn-looking establishment is actually a coffee roasting station. Beam would love to try and roast some beans himself and Kit promised that he would teach him. They entered another section of the property and Beam noticed that it was the herbs and spices plantation and the farther they went he eventually started seeing flowers of different kind and color.

Every farmer they encountered along the way would greet them and wave at Kit. And Kit would smile at them.

The cart finally stopped at their destination.

"We're here." Kit announced.

Beam looked around. He wanted to pinch himself just to check if he was dreaming.

When Kit asked him for help he never would have thought that it would be on a field of yellow daffodils. It goes far as the eye could see.

Beam's heart swelled up in pure happiness. His eyes was getting blurry as tears ran down on its own. This time he didn't bother to wipe it away.

"It's beautiful." He said in awe.

The sun in his face and the wind in his hair, Beam felt finally free.

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