Monday morning, I felt refreshed and blessed dahil sa mga sharings kagabi with my churchmates. Nasa hospital parin ako, nakadextrose. I feel better now at bukas na bukas ay makakalabas na ako. I told them I don't want to spend my days inside the hospital at baka pagsisihan ko pa ito in the end.
The room was so quiet.
Everyone went out to breathe some fresh air.
I was left alone. Because I want to. I was reading a book while leaning my back on the headboard. Then suddenly, the door cracked and swang. I looked in the doorway. Wearing a pastel floral sleveless dress, a sling bag, white sneakers and her everyday makeup.
"Hi.." I close my book and put it on the side table.
"..Emma...."
I don't know her name but I know her.
"Emma Reyes..Seven's e--"
"ex.." I smiled. I knew there's something we need to talk.
"Please.." pinaupo ko siya sa upuan sa table ng higaan ko.
We remained silence for seconds. Medyo humuhugot pa siya ng lakas cause it seems like there's something big she wanted to tell.
And finally she starts.
"I loved him but I cheated on him... Nung nalaman niya ang mga pinagagawa ko, nagalit sya. Nasaktan. Pero pinatawad parin niya ako. Minahal ulit pero hindi na gaya ng pagmamahal niya sa akin noon. May kulang na.."
I listen attentively and tears start rolling in her pinkish cheeks.
"...I lost his trust..Day by day pinagsisihan ko ang mga nagawa kong kasalanan sa kanya. Takot na takot ako na baka paggising ko, wala na siyang kunting pagmamahal sa akin.. at..nagkatotoo nga.. He met you..He fell in love with you. Sa sobrang honest niya, sinabi niya mismo sa harap ko na nililigawan ka niya. I was..." she looked down. My heart aches. One story but with two different sides.
"broken that day. I knew it would come. I knew he would give up. I knew it was my fault. He loved me so much but I chose to broke his heart. Up until now, hindi ko parin matanggap-tanggap na naging kayo, na pinili ka niya kesa sa akin, na mas minahal ka niya kesa sa akin kahit ibinalandra ko na ang katawan ko sa harap niya..pero... sabi niya ' My girlfriend trusts me so much.' Then he left......abby, I'm sorry if there's a time na pinangarap kong mawala ka. I'm sorry kung pinangarap kong mawala ka sa buhay niya but trust me Abby, I didn't wish you to die. Kaya ako nandito because it seems like I owe you an apology."
she was upset, and crying. I grabbed her hands. I was dissolved into tears.
"Emma.. I'm.. sorry. I... I didn't know about it. I'm ..sorry." she sobbed harder. I hugged her closer feeling the grief and struggling to process what she had said.
"Shh..It's not your fault. My fault. But Abby, I have one request.." I let go.
"Ano yun?" Tanong ko habang pinahid ang mga luha. Then she took my hands.
" Please fight for your life. Hindi kaya ni Seven na mawala ka. He went to my house last day at naglabas siya ng sama ng loob. I had never seen him cry so hard. Not even in our relationship before. Please Abby..please promise me."
"I cannot promise Emma." I looked away, trying not to look her disappointment,
"Hindi ko na hawak ang buhay ko."
"Abby.."
The more I fight, the more I give hopes to the people who'll be left soon. The more I fight, the more I get hurt. Because in the end, God's plans will be followed. Gaya ng sabi ko kanina, hawak na niya ang buhay ko. Hindi ko na ito pagmamay-ari. Masakit man pero kailangan ko ng tanggapin ang kapalaran ko.
I remembered my birthday wishes. To have a long life, good health and more blessings to come. The most 3 common wishes. But only one out of three came true. I may not be healthy, had no long life but I'm more blessed.
Emma left soon. Maya-maya rin ay dumating si Seven. Hindi ko muna siya pinansin. Humiga ako at tinalikuran siya. Alam kong nasasaktan siya ng sobra kahit ipakita pa niya sa akin na okay lang siya. But inside, they aren't.