October 10
Friday doesn't mean a thing to me anymore. Instead I'm sitting here in my bedroom with my music and my journal. I keep a journal so that I have something to do instead of follow around other people who are almost as sad as I was, but their reason is that I'm gone.
My reason for sadness was completely unpredictable. All of sudden it hit me like a train and that train never stopped. I was diagnosed last year with major depression and anxiety but whenever someone asked me why I felt that way, I couldn't answer because I hadn't the slightest idea why. Of course, they did not understand. Nobody understood, not my friends, not my family, not the doctors, no one. So I fell into numbness, to a point of no return. By the time it was August I had been wearing long sleeves for many months. So finally, I decided that enough was enough and it all ended.