As the cab approached the hotel Millie couldn't wait for some alone time with Dex. Mac and CJ had shared the taxi with them so Millie felt like she couldn't really talk to him, not properly. They were all tired having just come off stage and although she had tones to talk to Dex about she knew she would annoy them all if she talked the entire journey.
The car pulled up outside of a grand looking hotel, she was surprised by the grandeur and obvious expense the record label was going to put the guys up. She expected them to be staying in pretty mediocre hotels, or on the bus, She remembered Dex telling her that they rarely stayed in hotels, they were always on the bus, the best they got was a day room to shower and get away from each other for a little while so It seemed odd to Millie that lately they seemed to be staying in hotels every night and luxury ones at that! Dex must have been doing even better than she thought.
Waiting for Mac whilst he went inside the hotel to make sure it was safe for Dex to get out of the car, Dex rested his head on her shoulder, Millie stroked his cheek, the drug thing was still eating away at her, part of her wanted to bring it up and get the truth out of him but the other half of her didn't want to ruin the very little time she had with him. Maybe now wasn't the time but she knew it was never going to just go away in her mind. She'd spent her teens dating an addict and it was the worst experience of her life! Certainly not one she was going to repeat. The endless lies and constant fights, the never knowing if what he was saying or doing was genuine or a result of being off his head. The never ending worry Will he be ok by the morning or will this be the one that kills him? The fights with other guys, the cheating, being arrested on a regular basis and the agony of being the one trying to fix it all.. To fix him!
There was no way she was going through all that again at her age, she knew no better as a teen, she did now and if nothing else she knew deserved better than that life.
She sighed, leaning her head against the window she gazed out. Dex lifted his head from her sensing something was up.
"Hey are you ok?" He asked, his voice quiet and exhausted.
"Yeah" she looked at him forcing a smile. Dex wasn't buying it.
"Are you sure?" He pushed. She just nodded. She was relieved as Mac opened the car door preventing Dex from interrogating her further.
"Come on, there's no one around in there, you're fine" said Mac. Dex and CJ got out first.
As Millie slid along the seat to the open door she could hear a commotion coming from outside, it made her a little nervous, she got out slowly, cautiously looking around to see what was going on. She noticed it was coming from the cab behind them.
Making no attempt to hide it, Jesse and Cat were in a full swing domestic!
Millie felt embarrassed for them. She turned to Dex and rolled her eyes, neither of them really knew what to do. Mac handed Dex over to another crew member as he went to try and sort things out.
He grabbed Jesse by the shoulder, Mac was a big guy but Jesse shook him off with ease.
He went straight back to Cat grabbing her by the hair he pulled her head down in an attempt to get her back in the taxi.
Mac grabbed him again, two other guys from their security team rushed to help, pulling Cat free of him.
"Back off Mac! This doesn't concern you!" Snapped Jesse, stumbling all over the road, obviously off his head.
"Yeah it fucking does Jess!" Mac shouted back at him
"It concerns us all! Your actions and reputation could ruin careers for all these guys, have some fucking sense" he snapped.
Jesse looked around at the rest of the band in what looked like a moment of realisation. It wasn't.
"Oh fuck the lot of you" he replied clearly not in a state to access his conscience! He got back in the cab and slammed the door, it sped away leaving Cat stood on the pavement in floods of tears.
Mac whispered something to Cat as he put his arm around her and began to walk her towards the hotel, he sighed heavily, obviously fed up of Jesse's bullshit, he gestured for the rest of the band to follow.
"Aren't you going to go after him?" Asked Zach, usually Mac didn't let them go two feet away without him, he took his job and their safety so seriously that Dex often felt suffocated by him.
"Nah" replied Mac, "I'm not here to babysit, he got himself in this mess, he can get himself out! He'll be back when he's ready" he'd clearly had enough of him and Dex understood. Mac wasn't there to sort his alcohol or drug problems, he was there to sort the movements and security of the band which Jesse was hugely compromising.
Approaching the main entrance to the hotel Dex leaned over to Millie
"I should really go after him" He whispered. Millie was annoyed that he was even considering it.
"There's no way Mac would let you go" she replied
"I know, but he's my friend and he'd do the same for me" replied Dex
Millie couldn't understand why he would even want to go, after the scene he had just caused, leaving Cat crying on the pavement. Jesse was being a dick! And she was fairly sure Jesse wouldn't have done the same for Dex!
"I think he's better left to calm down" replied Millie, hoping to dissuade him, she didn't want him risking his own safety going out without his security for Jesse who was being so fucking selfish!
"I guess" agreed Dex reluctantly. Millie exhaled deeply, relieved that he had reconsidered.
Upstairs, Dex held open the hotel room door for Millie, she kissed him as she walked past him into the room, he grabbed her round the waist playfully pulling her into him, letting go of the heavy door it jerked closed, hitting them both!
"Owww" giggled Millie; Dex laughed still trying to kiss at the same time. Not stopping to turn the lights on he pulled her into the room, bumping into all of the furniture attempting to find the bed! The moonlight shone through the windows giving him just enough light to make out the bed in the centre of the room. They flopped down on the bed, still tangled up in each other, they banged heads.
"Owwww" exclaimed Millie, giggling again.
"Shush you" said Dex putting his finger to her lips, whilst laughing a little himself. He was clumsy, it was just his nature, she'd get used to it.
As much as Millie was caught up in the moment Jesse and Cat were still in the back of her mind, for a brief moment she worried where Cat was, was she ok? She wondered if really she should be with Cat, comforting her, she was away from home, upset and alone in a strange country, Millie felt like she should be a good friend. But they weren't friends, Millie didn't know Cat at all. She tried to temporarily put her thoughts to the back of her mind. She barely had any time with Dex and she wanted to enjoy it, I'm sure Mac's taking care of her she reassured herself and attempted to reign her thoughts back to Dex.
Looking down at her beneath him the moon shone down on her face creating the perfect romantic setting, pushing himself up on his elbows he looked into her pretty big brown eyes, she smiled at him, he could see she was thinking about something, her eyes darted from side to side in obvious battle in her head.
"What's up" asked Dex, Millie hesitated.
"Do you think I should go and see if Cat is ok?" she asked "I mean she was upset and away from home, maybe another girl to talk to would help?" Millie really didn't want to leave Dex but she felt some kind of moral duty to be a good person despite having only just met Cat it was as if there was a universal women's code or something she just felt like it was the right thing to do
"Are you ever thinking of me when we're doing this?" Asked Dex
"Last time it was Aria's wedding, this time, Cat, am I boring you?" Joked Dex
Millie laughed a little.
"I'm sorry, of course I'm thinking of you! There's no where else in the world I'd rather be than here, under you" she smiled up at him, pushing herself into him a little. He smiled back.
"But i feel bad, I can't help thinking I should see if she's ok?" Explained Millie
"I don't know baby, if you think it will help, go" he replied, it was obvious from his body language and tone of voice that he didn't want her to go but he knew that someone probably should check she was ok and Millie was the best person to do it.
But at the same time he knew if she stayed, with the way he was feeling this could have been the amazing night he'd really longed for he was completely wired with adrenaline having not long come of stage and he needed to work his energy out and in the moonlight setting of their hotel room he knew he could have made her night pretty memorable.
He could feel his entire body pulsating as the adrenaline coursed through his veins he tried to calm himself down, counting slowly in his head.
"I'm sorry babe, I will be as quick as I can" she said as Dex climbed off of her so she could get up off the bed. He rolled onto his back and sighed, his heart still racing in his chest. It was probably a good thing to have a bit of time to calm himself down anyway he thought.
"Yeah, I'll wait up for you" he replied. "Make sure you do" she smiled as she leaned in and kissed him gently. She closed the hotel room door quietly behind her and headed down the corridor to Mac's room, she wasn't sure where Cat would even be.
She knocked gently on the door, jumping as the door flew open in about two seconds. Mac looked mad, his face bright red as he looked at Millie stood in the doorway. "Oh, Millie it's you" he said letting down his guard, "come in" he said. Millie felt tense. Mac had always been really good to her but he still made her nervous, he was a big fella and when he got fired up he could be pretty scary.
"I thought you were Jess, we were about to have world war 3 up in here" laughed Mac, Millie could believe it. She knew she definitely didn't want to be there when Mac got hold of Jesse.
As Millie walked further into the hotel room she spotted Cat sat in a chair in the corner of the room, she was talking on her phone, Millie perched on the end of the bed, feeling a little uncomfortable and wondering if she should be there or not. Mac stood right in front of her leaning against the dressing table at the foot of the bed.
"Do you think I should talk to Cat?' whispered Millie, trying to stay out of ear shot of Cat. "Couldn't hurt" sighed Mac, clearly tired of the drama. I'm gonna go down to the bar for a bit, give you ladies 15 minutes to yourselves" said Mac, pleased to be handing Cat over to Millie, he had no idea what to do with a woman crying! He could deal with all the hassle that came with the band but crying women.. that was a whole other league.
Alone with Cat Millie glanced over to her catching her eye, Cat smiled in acknowledgement, making her excuses she hung up her phone.
"Hi Millie" said Cat tearily as she wiped her eyes with her sleeve
"Hey" said Millie in a sympathetic tone. Shifting awkwardly along the edge of the bed towards her
"I know it's a silly question but...are you ok?" asked Millie. Cat smiled and sighed.
"Yeah" she replied unconvincingly
"I shouldn't have come" said Cat.
"He doesn't like surprises, I knew that, I should have just stuck to our plans and seen him in a few weeks" she continued. Millie felt frustrated that Cat was suggesting it was her fault. She had done a nice thing in flying all that way to see him, it wasn't her, it was him!
"Hey, this isn't your fault hun" said Millie, putting a friendly hand on Cat's knee reassuringly.
"Surprising your boyfriend when you haven't seen each other in a long time is a lovely gesture, I did the same thing" explained Millie.
"He's just had way too much to drink tonight! I'm sure he'll apologize in the morning" said Millie. Cat knew he wouldn't. Jesse had always been fiery. He'd had a temper as long as she had known him and sadly this wasn't unusual behavior for him.
"I doubt it. He probably wont even remember in the morning" she sighed "He does this a lot" revealed Cat. Her eyes welling up again.
"Oh" replied Millie as she got up and got a tissue from the box on the dressing table and handed it to Cat.
"All these little girls who think they're in love with Jess, if only they knew what it was really like to be in love with him!" said Cat.
"I always think it's funny, they all come up to him after the show wanting pictures with him, telling him how much they adore him, giving him gifts and he's sweet to them, then he comes home to me drunk, In a bad mood, annoyed that he's just had to pose for a million photos and takes it out on me" Cat shot Millie a look that she didn't quite understand.
"Oh" replied Millie, she didn't expect Cat to be so open, she felt so awkward and had no idea what to say. She didn't feel like she had any right to give advice, Cat was older than her, she'd been around the band and dating Jesse for years so Millie felt like she was totally unqualified to say anything but there was one question eating away at her. She battled herself in her head for a few seconds as to whether she should ask or not.
"I know we don't really know each other but can I ask you something?" asked Millie. Cat nodded. Millie hesitated for a second wondering if she should ask or not
"Is Jesse an alcoholic? Or does he take anything?" asked Millie. Cat smiled
"Alcoholic, I don't know, but he has a drink problem for sure. I can't remember back far enough to a day he didn't drink" explained Cat, her eyes revealed a deep sadness, Millie couldn't help feeling sorry for her, it seemed like she was completely broken, like she'd been putting up with this for so long that it had worn her down to nothing.
"Do you think he's on drugs too?" Millie wasn't sure if she was pushing with the questions now, she didn't want Cat to feel like she was being interrogated
"Yeah" replied Cat, looking down at the floor.
"I know he's on drugs babe. He does it at home all the time" Millie was shocked. It reignited her fears about Dex.
"Do you think they all do?" asked Millie. Not really wanting to hear the answer. Cat had been around far longer than she had and had known Dex for a few years, Millie thought perhaps she would know and it would save an awkward conversation and probably argument with Dex later on.
"No, babe. It's just Jess" she replied rolling her eyes.
"He's been into drugs since he was about 14 years old! Way before the band happened"
"If you're worried about Dex you shouldn't be, he doesn't mess around with things like that, you have nothing to worry about" smiled Cat. Millie felt so relieved to hear her say that.
"You've got an amazing guy" smiled Cat
"Don't let him go" Millie knew she was right and having it confirmed released a huge weight she'd had on her shoulders.
"What are you going to do now?" asked Millie
"I'm getting a flight home in the morning, he's probably out now nailing a teenage fan, he doesn't want me here" replied Cat.
"He wouldn't do that, would he?" asked Millie, hoping Cat was just joking.
"I'm 99% sure he's a floozy on the road" said Cat. Millie had never heard of a man being referred to as a floozy! But even still, she wondered why Cat was still around putting up with that if it was true.
"I'm sure he's just out clearing his head... Where are you staying tonight?, I can kick Dex in with Jesse and you can stay in with me if you like" said Millie trying to lighten the mood and change the subject. She felt very uncomfortable.
"Caroline said I could bunk in with her for the night, so I'm good, but thank you" said Cat. Millie was relieved; in reality she'd have been gutted to not spend the night with Dex!
"There's no way I'd make you give up your room with Dex, he actually wants you here!" Added Cat with a forced smile. It was obvious to Millie that her relationship with Dex was hard for Cat to see, she clearly wanted Jesse to want her there too. Millie just smiled nervously.
"Ok, well I'll leave you too it then, Mac will be back shortly" said Millie as she got up off the bed and turned to leave
"Millie..." Said Cat
Millie turned back for a second
"Yeah?" She replied
"Thank you for coming to see me, I appreciate it. I know you don't get to see Dex much and you're probably dying to get back to your man!" Cat smiled "so thank you!"
"Of course" said Millie with a smile and she went back to her room.