" REPUTATION "
" just know that you don't have to do this alone, promise i'll never let you down "
_
richie had always been a mess, how could he not? but the mess inside of him got significantly worse that day at the cafeteria, when the boy he had been crushing on (and fooling around with occasionally) called him 'faggot' and ended him only to preserve his golden reputation. reputation as an asshole.
him an richie had a huge fight, a physical fight. everyone was looking, including eddie himself. bev tried to stop it but got harshly pushed, landing on the floor. they both got detention and after that came to its end, they never spoke a word to each other again.
and god, did richie change.
he barely talked to anyone and he never wanted to hang out with the group out of school hours.
well - anyone except eddie.
they had been spending an awful lot of time together, even more than usual considering that they had been best friends since kindergarten and their families had sunday lunches every other week. eddie didn't know why, but he found himself agreeing to go ride around derry with richie at 1AM on school nights. he didn't want to care so much about why that was happening, he just wanted to be there for him after how his heart had been brutally stepped on.
the trashmouth took eddie to a lot of places that eddie wouldn't have stepped foot in if it weren't for him. after a few nights, eddie noticed that these places were the go-to places for boys who just wanted to make out without being judged. it wasn't after, like, the tenth night they had hung out that richie admitted he had gone to all of this places with the famous crush.
"then why do we come?" eddie had asked in confusion.
richie sighed. "to tell you the truth, eds... i don't fucking know." and he let out a humorless chuckle. "maybe the dumb little lovestruck fucker inside of me wants to hold on to that asshole for a little while longer."
and eddie decided that he understood.
time went by, a few months to be exact. eddie and richie hung out almost every night, except when richie truly wasn't up for it. eddie's bedroom window was open every night to climb out of it when he would see richie's car approaching his home.
eddie didn't know, but something inside of richie was bulding up and had been building up ever since he was through with detention and saw eddie in the hallway waiting for him with two smoothies. something that he didn't think he could hold inside of him for much longer.
that particular night, they were at a golf court, sitting next to one of the holes. apparently, that was a good place for gay couples as well and riche and his crush had been there a few times. eddie and him bought shitty sandwiches and were eating them pretty avidly.
eddie looked up at the sky, letting a small smile slip from his lips. the weather was pretty nice, and richie's company always made him feel good.
"whatcha smiling about?" richie asked with a smirk that made him look a lot more like the person he used to be before the incident.
eddie shrugged, blushing. "i don't know. i guess this is nice." he grinned.
richie realized he was right. "yeah. this is nice." he said. "you know, i really do love spending time with you, eds. maybe you don't know this but you've helped me a lot. you really have." richie said fondly as he wrapped his arms around eddie in a tight embrace.
eddie returned the hug, caressing richie's back. "oh, it was nothing. i love spending time with you too, rich." he slowly let go of him. "you know... you deserve better." he said. richie's smile slightly faltered as he looked down at his lap. "you deserve better than a douchebag who puts his reputation over your feelings." richie nodded along with his words but didn't say a thing. "if you really like someone, they should matter. you matter, richie. you make a difference in this world." he murmured. "and even if he didn't treat you right, you gotta stay true to yourself and believe that someone out there is gonna be willing to love you and cherish you like you're the most valuable treasure in the world." only when he finished speaking did eddie realize he had talked more than he intended to.
richie waited a few seconds before smiling widely at his best friend. but little by little, his smile started fading away. it looked like he was in deep thought, having an inner battle with himself as he tried to figure out if what he wanted to do was truly the right thing. "eddie..." and he fell silent.
the smaller boy bit his bottom lip. everything got so tense so suddently. eddie shot his eyebrows up, trying to get richie to finish his sentence.
richie sighed sadly. "you're so good, eds. you're just so damn good. it's infuriating, you know that?"
"don't say that, rich."
"it's the truth." he simply said. "and because of that, maybe i can't really say what i wanted to say today..." he trailed off, fixing his glasses up his nose.
eddie blinked in surprise. "what?"
richie shook his head with a chuckle. "nothing. forget about it, it's no big deal."
eddie really wanted to know what richie meant by that but he didn't want to push him, at least not now that he was still healing. so he just kept his mouth shut.
instead, they fell into a weird silence. something had clearly been left unsaid and the only one who could break that feeling was richie. but he didn't feel worthy of it.
eventually, it was too much. richie wanted eddie. he wanted him so badly that his low self esteem didn't matter.
so he turned around, grabbed the tiny boy by the shoulder and smashed his lips passionately against his. eddie made a little squeaky noise at the suddent gesture but when he realized what was happening he just sighed against his mouth and wrapped his arms around the taller boy's neck.
once richie realized that eddie wasn't grossed out at all he let out a little laugh against his lips as he started to slowly pull him onto his lap. his hands quickly found his petite waist.
richie's lips left eddie's as he trailed down to his jawline and neck. eddie could feel the lustful heat coming out of his mouth and a chill ran through his spine. he tangled his fingers in richie's curls and he just let himself drown in the pleasure he was feeling.
"fuck, you're so good." richie whispered against eddie's skin.
"yeah, you've said that already." eddie breathed out.
"i just want to be sure you understand it." richie said, pulling away. he rested his forehead against eddie's. "because i can't stand you not knowing. i want you to know how incredibly good you are. to the losers and specially, to me." he said and his own words made him blush instantly. "just... just getting to be with you like this is..." richie bit his bottom lip as his hands ran up eddie's back to feel him even closer than before.
"richie," eddie called him. "i want you, okay? look, i know you probably think you're worth nothing right now but i swear to god, i will spend the rest of my life trying to make you feel loved."
richie's eyes started to water. "oh, would you look at that. it actually feels real." he sniffled.
"would i ever lie to you?" eddie questioned, rhetorically of course. he cupped richie's cheeks with his hands when he saw a single tear streaming down his face. "you'll be okay, rich. you know i'm not good at this but you'll be okay with me. nobody is gonna hurt you, not while i'm alive and breathing."
richie let out a teary laugh before attacking eddie's lips once again. the smaller boy could feel how much richie needed to feel safe, how much he needed somebody to lean on when everything was going to hell. eddie was that person, and eddie wanted to be that person. he wanted it so much it was unhealthy.
_
based off of that part from the perks of being a wallflower where patrick kisses charlie. except nobody is straight in this oneshot lol 🌈🌈✨
also yes the ending sucks i'm sorry that's all you're getting:)