She rested her head in her hands. The king was late and she feared he wouldn't come at all. His lateness gave her time to imagine herself being led to the scaffold while Maintenon smirked from the crowd. There'd been more arrests, but so far no guards had come knocking on her door. It bothered her that the king had warned Soissons of her imminent arrest to give her time to flee, but he'd never said anything to her about the arrests or a warning of who might be accusing her.
When he finally appeared, thirty minutes late, she gave him a curtsey before casting him her flirty eyes and swaying her hips as she approached him. She'd piled on the rouge today to hide her pale cheeks. Her hands hurt from how much she'd wrung them.
"I missed you. I'm glad you could come to Clagny today." She craned her neck for a kiss and her heart gave a little jolt when he met her lips. Fontanges had left court for a convent already, sent away by her embarrassed family.
"Would you like a snack or some champagne?" She gestured to the tray she'd had the maids set out for her.
"No thank you."
She stilled. He'd never turned down her food before. "Please don't tell me this has to do with all those poison rumors."
"Sit down," the king commanded as he grabbed a seat for himself. "I'm here to find out the truth."
"The truth?" Her knees wobbled and she sat down. "What do you mean?" Her heart raced as she searched the king's face for any sign of what he might be thinking. He might as well be a statue. Out of the corner of her eye she caught sight of a guard peering into the room. Her hands grasped at the arms of her chair, clinging as though for dear life.
"Have you tried to poison anyone?" the king asked.
She let out a gasp of horror. "Of course not! Whatever is being whispered about me is a lie. I've done nothing. I'm not a murderer, and I know you know that."
"You never schemed against Fontanges?" He kept his cool gaze pinned on her.
"I schemed to get her out of your bed every day, but not by poison."
"La Voisin's daughter has accused you of black magic."
She stared at him as she struggled to process his words. "Me?" She couldn't even remember if she'd ever seen Voisin's daughter. Was she in league with Maintenon or Fontanges? Or was someone leading the investigation plotting against her?" She shook her head. "Never and I'm offended anyone would accuse me."
He switched his gaze to the food sitting in front of him, but he didn't reach for any of it. "Colbert has claimed your innocence as well. He thinks Louvois is trying to get you out of the way for Angélique." He'd always been a supporter of Fontanges.
Plotting wouldn't be a new concept to him. After all Louvois once helped her get rid of Lauzun, but he was a smart enough man to throw his weight behind Maintenon, not the girl already sent away to a convent. "I promise you I've never used poison or whatever other nonsense is being claimed and I'm inclined to agree with Colbert. Louvois is a great supporter of Madame Fontanges and Madame Maintenon."
He stared past her, his brow knitted.
"Oh, Louis. Look at me." She lifted his chin with a finger. "Do you really think I'd stoop so low? I love you, yes a great deal, but not once have I considered murder as a possible course let alone black magic." She spat out the last two words, not enjoying the way speaking about the topic made her insides roil. "I have a lot of enemies because I'm the woman who loves you. My station alone is enough to garner accusations. Louvois is using lies to pave the way for a new mistress. Nothing more."
They stared into each other's eyes as the seconds ticked by.
"Do you think I'd still be here if I was guilty?" Her words came out steady despite the churning of her stomach and the tightness constricting her chest.
His face softened. "I know." He clasped her hand in his. "I'm trying to keep the investigation quiet. I will make sure no harm comes to you."
"Thank you." She squeezed his hand and sealed his promise away in her mind. "But you never would have doubted me before Madame Maintenon and Fontanges. You would have seen right through the lies. Why the doubt now?"
His brow crinkled. "I don't know and I'm sorry for it. Sometimes it's hard to know who to believe when everyone has a different story."
She moved her hand away from it. "What's happened to us after all these years?" She let out a deep breath to release the painful tightness in her chest.
He licked his lips. "We've changed. We lost the magic of Versailles."
"No." She straightened up. "I haven't. I don't want to leave. Not now, not ever."
The corner of his mouth quirked up in a half smile. "You don't have to. If it makes you feel better, I have a gift for you."
"What is it?" Dread expanded in her stomach, making her want to vomit. How long had it been since he gave her anything? This could mean only one thing: a farewell gift.
"I'm sure you're aware the Comtesse de Soissons is gone. I'm giving you her position as superintendent of the queen's household." It was the highest position any woman at court could receive outside of being the queen and the same gift he'd given to Soissons once he was finished with her.
She stared at her hands. "What are you giving Madame Maintenon?"
"I'm giving her a position in the Dauphine's household." His legitimate daughter would get to have the false saint worm her way into her life just as she had with Athénaïs's children. It would also keep her at court and near the king.
She bit her tongue to keep from tossing insults his way. "A fine gift," she spit out.
"It suits her and the Dauphine likes her. She will be good company and a good role model for the Dauphine."
"That she will be." She continued to stare down, for once not knowing what to say to the king. Should she grovel to try to cling to her former position? Attack Maintenon? Or accept her fate? She didn't know. No words came to her.
"You're upset with me," the king said. He eyed her up as he folded his hands in his lap.
She let out an exhausted sigh. "Of course I am. I love you and now you're leaving me for Maintenon after all our years together. You've betrayed me."
His hand twitched as though he wanted to reach out to her. "I still love you, just not the same way I once did. The days of our youth and reckless love are gone. I need to focus on my country and my heir's future as king. Maintenon gives me the companionship I crave."
Athénaïs rallied. "I can give you any sex you want whenever you want it. Whatever you want or need from me just name it."
He shook his head. "That's not what I want anymore. My energy isn't what it used to be or my stamina. My tastes have changed. The court needs a stronger guiding hand. The investigation has shown me the awful things going on in the shadows. The divineresses and poisoners being visited by the ladies of court. I can't let it go on. It's time for a new era, a moral one."
She frowned, picturing the same words spewing from Maintenon's mouth. She could imagine the lectures the woman had been feeding him alongside his priests. And in a reign of morality, where did the king's bastards stand? "You've grown boring, Louis. I don't want us to be old. I want our golden days back."
"Me too," he said. He rubbed the back of his neck. "I wish those days weren't over but even I can't stop the march of time. I am very sorry for it but I can't be your lover any longer. Forgive me for changing into a grouchy old man."
She let out a small laugh that broke off as a sob threatened to erupt. He certainly had changed. His days were more regimented than ever. At any point she could look at the clock and know depending on the hour where he was at Versailles. The king she fell in love with would have called his current self a bore.
He leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. "I'm sorry. Don't prove me wrong in protecting you from the investigation."
"I won't." Her voice cracked. She stood up as he did, but he gave her no more affection before leaving.
She dropped into her chair and put her head in her hands. Her heart felt numb, like she had no more tears to shed over the king. She'd spent so many sleepless nights hurting and crying over him. Why bother now when it would change nothing? She didn't want to feel the pain. She'd rather go back in time and relive the golden years of their love all over again.
Refusing to sit and wallow, she headed for the Duc du Main's room. She needed a reminder of why she'd become mistress in the first place. To see all the good she'd done for her children. Her son was well off and always dressed in sumptuous clothing. He received an education fit for a prince even if his bastard status kept him from being one.
"Excuse me, where is my son?" She asked as she stood in the doorway.
A maid looked up for her dusting.
"He is visiting Madame Maintenon."
A shard of ice pierced her heart. "Stealing the king wasn't good enough for her? Did she have to steal my son away too?"
Uncomfortable, the maid shifted. "I will let him know you are looking for him, madame."
With a huff she left, feeling more alone than ever.