"What are you going to tell your mom?" Kith asked Cameron while reclining on his bed and rubbing her stomach. Seated on the floor, he scrolled intently through several tabs and pages on his laptop, legs crossed at the ankle, back pressed against the side of his bed.
"About what?" he said mechanically. Kith rolled just so she could see what he was doing over his shoulder. Some part of her wished he was doing actual schoolwork, a project, a paper, anything remotely educational. Cameron was deeply invested in a game of Bejeweled.
"School."
"What about school?" he answered in the same tone.
"The fact that you don't go to class," she reminded him unnecessarily.
"I do go to class," he fired back.
"I've never seen you go to class," she pointed out.
"I don't go all the time," he defended himself while contracting more points. "I always go the first day. You always go the first day."
"And then?" Kith studied his game.
"And then," he shrugged. "I don't really like my classes."
"That's the point of going to college," Kith replied, staring at the back of his head like he was stupid. Thanks to life, she couldn't afford to go to college. He had the opportunity; his mom was paying for everything, and he was wasting it. If he wanted to get drunk every night, he could've just stayed home. There was no point in moving an hour away to party.
"Maybe for people who have no lives," he countered, connecting another three gems. "I like having fun. Class is boring, partying is not. Which one do you think I'm gonna do?"
"The one your mom's putting her hard-earned money towards," she answered stoically.
Cameron shrugged again and rubbed his nose. Breaking his staring contest with the computer, he took a nice long drink of his soda before setting the can down. "Everything's under control. I've got this."
Kith decided that he wasn't going to tell her at all. There was no way he was bringing home good grades. If he could be graded on poisoning his liver, he'd get an A. In the area that counted, the class, he had to be failing. Kith didn't believe for a second that he actually went to class. Where he went during the day was still a mystery, but she was certain it wasn't to one of the lecture halls. She'd also never seen him do any homework. All of his textbooks were in the same spot day in and day out, unopened and untouched.
"You didn't have any work to do during the break?" she questioned.
"How the hell would I know?" he replied. Clearing the final gems, he cheered as he moved onto the next level. Seizing his soda, he downed the rest of it and threw the empty can onto his desk. Kith followed the can's arc through the air and then stared at it in its final resting place.
Sighing, she rolled onto her back.
He's wasting everything, she thought. So was the unfairness of life. He got a free college education; she got a baby. Cameron's lackadaisical attitude towards not going to class or doing anything remotely academic despite being in a place of higher learning was almost infuriating.
So infuriating, that she wanted to hit him, hard. Cameron had the outline of her dream. She wanted to go to college so desperately; she would've been going in the Fall. Unlike Cameron though, she would use the opportunity to its fullest, the right way. "Stop staring me down with those judgy little eyes."
"I'm not judging you."
"Yeah, you are," he laughed. "I can tell by your voice. You're definitely judging me."
"I'm not," she said emphatically. Silence overtook them both. Kith laid there listening to the sound of jewels being cleared from the board. Every so often, Cameron cussed beneath his breath and scratched the back of his head. "Do you actually like Nirvana, or did you just buy the poster?"
"A little of both. The poster's sweet, and I actually listen to the band." Shutting his laptop, he thoroughly rubbed his eyes and sighed. "What do you listen to?"
"Coldplay," she answered with a smile.
"Anything else?"
"Yeah," she nodded. "But Coldplay's my favorite."
"Everyone likes Coldplay," he answered.
"Because they're more than a band," Kith said defensively. "They're a way of life." They were even more than that. They were a soundtrack to life.
At dinner, Kith chose a seat next to Austin, just so she wouldn't have to look at him. They said nothing to each other, and Kith only spoke when Cameron or his mom asked her a question. She wasn't really in a talking mood. The food looked great though. The table covered with a white tablecloth was laden in turkey, macaroni and cheese, mashed potatoes, gravy, stuffing, and cranberry sauce. Everything was steaming, as it was supposed to be on Thanksgiving.
When she dashed from the table to throw up, Cameron effortlessly came up with a lie, telling his mom and brother that Kith had gotten sick days before, but insisted on coming anyways.
Kith subdued her excitement when it came time to pack up her things and load back up in Cameron's truck. In the front passenger seat, she watched Cameron hug his mom briefly and brother twice as long. No one had suspected anything. If they did, they were polite enough to keep their thoughts to themselves.
Kith felt she was entitled to keep lying so long as there wasn't clear, visual evidence. Lying was a strong word. She wasn't lying; she was just keeping something to herself. Leaving their house meant that she could breathe. She could move freely without worrying if she'd lose her voice around the corner.
One afternoon, Cameron left her in the living room to go get something. He told her to talk to Austin and catch up since they hadn't seen each other in so long. The room got so quiet that she almost felt the urge to throw up again, this time intentionally so she'd have a reason to escape. When Cameron came back in the thickest part of the silence, he assumed that he'd just walked in on a break in the conversation. Per usual, he was oblivious.
"Are you okay?" Sliding into the driver's seat, he turned the key in the ignition, and buckled up.
"Yeah."
"You don't need to go the bathroom?"
"No."
"Pregnant people have to go to the bathroom a lot," he commented.
"Shut up!" she hissed.
"What?" He made a face. "Mom's way over there."
"She still might hear you," Kith argued badly. Lifting her hood up, she covered her head in minute warmth before resting her head against the headrest. "And I'm fine. Let's just go."
"It wasn't so bad, right?" He backed out of the driveway slowly, checking both ways beforehand. "Only a week. Now we're back to college."
"Right," she snorted, resting a portion of her forehead against the window. The mirror-houses raced past, morphing into a blur as he turned out of the neighborhood. "You're back to doing nothing, and I'm back to going to school."
"Don't sound so excited," he said sarcastically. Grinding her teeth together, she couldn't tell if her comment bothered him. Cameron mouthed the lyrics to whatever rock song was on the radio. He didn't seem the least bit disturbed. "Did you talk to Austin before we left?"
"Yeah."
Within ten minutes, they were on the highway.
"Check it out," plugging up his iPod to the speakers, he swapped his attention between its tiny screen and the road. Coldplay came through the speakers. Glancing over, he took note of her reaction before safely returning his focus to the interstate and the cars flying by.
"Why do you wear that hat all the time?" she asked, staring at it.
"What?" Touching the brim, he made a face at her. "You don't like it?"
"I didn't say that."
"Even if you don't, I'm not taking it off," he replied, pressing his foot down on the gas. Sitting up straighter to see in the rearview mirror, he changed lanes and started going faster. "This hat's cool. Has my name on it."
"If you say so."
"Don't make me turn this off," he gestured to the speakers. "I don't even like them that much."
"You said everyone likes Coldplay," Kith commented, bringing up one of their previous conversations. A car honked as Cameron swerved in front of them without making sure the lane was clear.
"Yeah, well... I think they're decent," he shrugged without even blinking at their almost accident. "But they're not great enough for car-listening."
"You're crazy," Kith shook her head, disagreeing with that completely.
"Whatever," he muttered. "They're kinda over-hyped."
"Shut up," Kith rolled her eyes.
"Why'd you never go out with Austin?"
"What?" she started. The sudden change in conversation caught her off guard.
"You and Austin," he clarified, lowering his speed some. A police car idled in the middle of the highway. A uniformed officer lounged against the side, clocking speeds with a high-tech radar gun. Clearing his throat, Cameron did his utmost to look responsible and law-abiding. "You and that kid are perfect for each other."
"No we're not," she answered.
"I mean... You're..."
She knew what he wanted to say. Being pregnant shouldn't discount her from having relationships with guys. She didn't want to be alone for the rest of her life just because she'd experienced the trimesters earlier than expected. That was unfair to say, and just stupid to think. Having a kid would be weird, maybe. What would guys think of her? By the time she was twenty-two, her kid would be five years old. Her son/daughter would be entering kindergarten. Wistfully, she thought about how she was supposed to graduate from college at twenty-two.
"Maybe later," she mumbled. "Not now."
"That's what I mean," Cameron agreed, turning the volume up some. "He's a good kid. You're a good kid. You two would be good together."
"That's a lot of good."
"I like the word," he said easily. "It's simple, and you can use it with pretty much everything." Bobbing his head in time with a song of the band he said wasn't that great, he continued driving. "And think, if you and Austin got married, you'd be like my sister. We'd be related."
"Yeah," shifting in the seat, she rubbed her stomach. Cameron needed to stop emphasizing the idea so much. He was strangely passionate about her marrying his brother; it was a little weird, a little too much.
"He's not real good with kids though," he commented absently. "Winter Break at school starts in three weeks. Its way longer than any one they ever gave us in high school; it's like a godsend. You're staying with me?" Without waiting for her to answer, he kept talking. "Of course you're staying with me. You're stomach's gonna be bigger. Mom might have something to say about that, you know."
"Yeah, I know."
"What are you going to tell her?"
"I don't know," Kith said piercingly, rubbing her forehead. He was talking too much for her liking, and it was annoying. Cameron sounded just like his mom, asking too many questions, not minding his business. She didn't know what she was going to tell anyone, let alone his mom. She'd have the answer before the next break though. Or at least that's what she told herself to truly avoid the issue.
Cameron stopped talking, once again taking the whip of her words as a side effect of her baby. Keeping his mouth shut, he turned the music up before focusing in on himself. If she liked Coldplay so much, maybe they would put her back in a safe zone.
To him, angry pregnant women were like time-bombs. There was no telling when they were going to go off, and how far their destructive forces would reach. He wanted to keep the peace as long as possible. Besides, he was on his way back to school. There were bound to be parties and girls. He didn't want her bad mood rubbing off on him.