Chapter 27: Night Sixteen/Day Seventeen in the Arena
High pitched screams tumble from my mouth. Jake lies dead on the ground, his head looks like it might spilt in half.
"HE WASN'T A THREAT. HE WASN'T A THREAT" I scream.
Luca stares at the boy. He looks stunned, as if he doesn't remember doing it.
""He came straight towards us. I couldn't see who it was. I didn't know him. We have to assume everyone outside our direct alliance is our enemy." Luca says, dropping his axe, before it drips anymore blood.
Luca makes the Hunger Games sound so simple. It is far from it.
"I guess so. After all we're all just trying to survive, but at what cost? Is it really worth living if it means you becoming a murderer?" I say.
Luca gives me a look reminds me of a wounded puppy. I wish he wouldn't.
"Willow, he was just another nameless tribute" Luca says dismissively. "Just another tribute less we have to kill I the future"
"I'm glad it's so easy for you" I say dryly.
I pick up my blanket and am just about to lie down when I turn back to Luca and say:
"He wasn't a nameless tribute. His name was Jake and he probably had a family that loved him and prayed he would come back, as does everyone in this arena. Just try to remember that the next time you whack someone's head off."
I expect him to throw me his wounded puppy dog look as he always did when I scolded him. Instead I am met with stone cold anger. The kind that sends shivers down your spine.
I lie down on the cold soft grass and hope that sleep takes me soon because I can't face Luca right now.
"It wasn't like that when you killed Eric" Luca muttered.
He probably thought I didn't hear it. I heard it, oh I heard it.
The next day Luca and I barely speak to one another. Alexis and Mason must sense the tension. Mason tries to make the mood lighter.
"I don't know what was said last night but if looks could kill" Mason starts, then after seeing my glare says "I'd be dead on the ground."
"Mason, shut up a second." Alexis says while counting the food supplies. "I don't understand where all our food supplies are going. A few days ago we had way more than this"
"Wow, it's almost like we've been eating it" Mason answers.
"It's not just that" Alexis snaps. "I had six throwing stars at the start of the games and I only used one now I have three. Tell me how that works?"
"Maybe you just misplaced them" Luca suggests.
Jugging by the look on Alexis's face, you would've thought Luca accused her of some heinous crime.
"I don't just misplace things. Someone must've stolen it. Yes! Someone has stolen them." Alexis cries before pacing around in a circle.
"Alexis calm down. No one is stealing our stuff, Okay? We'll just have to hunt for more or get some from our sponsors" Luca says shaking her shoulders.
Alexis nods her head. "That was close" she says.
"Yeah you almost had a mental breakdown over a packet of food" Mason says.
"Mason!" Alexis growls.
Alexis and Mason starts laughing and I'm laughing too. For a moment I feel ridiculously happy, like I am with a group of friends. Then Luca, who was laughing, catches my eye and looks down at the ground and my stomach drops.
What am I doing? I promised myself I wouldn't get attached to anyone in the arena. If it came down to it, I wouldn't be ale to kill Alexis or Mason. Not knowing they helped Luca so much. And I'd never kill Luca. I'd soon kill myself.
At noon, I take a walk down to the lake alone because if I stayed with them, I'd say something stupid.
I hear the footsteps trampling on the wet behind me. I expect to see Luca, instead I see Alexis striding towards me.
"Thought you'd like some company?" Alexis says.
"No offence but you're the last person I expected to see" I say.
"And why is that?" Alexis says giving a half smile as if she is half confused, half insulted.
"Well I got the feeling you don't like me"
"Is it because I'm condescending, because I'm like that with everyone." Alexis answers.
There's something strange about Alexis – she's always on edge and permanently exasperated.
"I'm sorry I come off that way. It's 'cause I don't trust people "She laughs.
"So do you trust me or something?"
"No. You showed up and suddenly everything goes missing. Not to mention Cooper's mysterious death. Awfully convenient?"
Has Alexis come to kill me because she suspects I'm a traitor? It would be perfect. She could've told Luca and Mason she was going to check up on me and slipped her weapon of choice, a throwing star into her jacket pocket. Then, when I wasn't looking throw a star at me and leave me to die.
My face must show my panic because Alexis laughs a sharp gritty laugh.
"I'm just kidding! Calm down!" Alexis shrieks.
"That's a good one! It's not like we're in a televised fight to the death"
I expect Alexis to give me a look of contempt, instead she punches my arm. I think it's supposed to be in a friendly manner but it makes my arm throb for the rest of the day.
I still haven't figured Alexis out yet. She seems to be temperamental – one minute she's joking the next she's deadly serious. After spending all day with Alexis, I find out Alexis is more like me than I thought; she is honest, but not necessarily rude, everyone knows she's joking half the time. Most of all, she just wants to go home. Like all of us.
Mason and Luca soon catch up with us and needless to say things aren't less awkward between Luca and me. At dinner we hardly exchange two words while Mason rattles on about life in District 2, with occasional comments from Alexis. Well not comments, mostly contradictions to what Mason has said.
It's interesting to find out about other Districts since we hardly knew anything about them other than what they produce. District 2's industry is masonry, which is why it is mainly made up of small villages which are situated around mines.
"But you would know all about the mines, living in district 12, wouldn't you?" Mason asks.
"Yeah, although we don't go down the mines til we're eighteen." Luca says.
"Neither do we" Alexis answers. "Of course there are other exciting job opportunities like brick layer, plasterer, and blacksmith"
"You're forgetting peacekeepers" Mason says.
Alexis's face contorts "I'd never be a peacekeeper. Not even if you paid me."
"I thought that was the general idea of a job was to get paid" Luca remarks, which earns him a glare from Alexis.
"I don't know, man. Being a peacekeeper seems okay. I mean if you were one of ones that just does his job and you don't shoot people on the spot because they look "suspicious"" Mason says.
"So you're gonna be the 1% of good peacekeepers?" Alexis asks.
"That's a huge exaggeration" Mason answers. "Besides, it's better than being a miner."
"I don't think being a miner would be that bad" Luca says.
Of course Luca thinks being a miner would be a good job opportunity – his father wasn't a miner, but mine was. Luca didn't worry everyday that the mines might collapse and trap his father forever.
"Not very fair on us girls. We're stuck preparing food and washing clothes when the boys get the real jobs" Alexis complains.
"I don't think you want to work in the mines, Alexis" I say. "It's probably very claustrophobic down there and you'd smell real bad the majority of the time".
"I guess so" Alexis says. "But I would still like to have the choice".
"If I was the mayor of District 2, I'd make sure woman had more job opportunities – like working in the mines" Mason says.
"Really" Alexis seemed to brighten at the idea, as if it was actually going to happen.
"Yeah, although that's probably not a great idea 'cause the ladies would get distracted by the male workers" Mason said, with a grin on his face.
"Don't be sexist. That's not how woman act" Alexis exclaims. "Tell him, Willow"
"Are you kidding? A man in overalls. Who could resist?" I joke.
Alexis scowls at me, which makes Luca laugh and Mason laugh even harder. I can't help but think how ridiculous the whole situation is. We're in a death match tournament with only one winner and we're all acting like best friends, laughing until our stomachs are sore. Is this any easier than being alone? Definitely.
"Hey, no need to be like that" I say. "Girls don't always get stuck with the boring jobs. My grandmother was a geologist".
"What's that?" Alexis asked, raising her eyebrow.
"I think she studied rocks and stuff" I say.
"Rocks? Is that what you're going to do? Look at rocks for a living like you're grandmother?" Alexis says.
"I wanted to be a school teacher" I say. "Not that it matters now".
"God, this conversation is so depressing" Alexis deadpans.
"Yeah let's go back to the lake and catch more fish" Mason suggests.
We all gather our supplies together and do as Mason suggested; head down to the lake.
Down at the lake we manage to catch a few fish but we mostly splash around in the water. It's moments like these that make me forget I'm in the Hunger Games. Even though it's only temporary, it helps the dread seep away, which before was sitting heavily on my shoulders. It's only daylight fades that the nagging doubts sweep back in, keeping me awake. Not for long I hope fatigue pours over me soon.
I can't stop playing the scene from earlier tonight; the four of us were sitting by the camp fire eating the fist we caught earlier. Alexis and Mason were engaged in an argument about someone from their school back in District 2. Luca had been quiet all day.
"You never told me you wanted to be a teacher" Luca said suddenly.
"Like I said, it doesn't matter now" I replied.
"Don't say that. You could still have a life after the games" Luca said.
"I don't think you understand" I said. "I don't want to win The Hunger Games. I wouldn't be able to just live my life. The Capitol...they're obsessed with these games. They'd never leave me alone. I would be praised for killing people for the rest of my life. The people back at home, my family, your family; none of them would look at me the same. I would never be able to look at myself the same. What kind of life would that be?"
"At least you'd still be alive" Luca spat back.
"And you wouldn't be" I said, trying to hold back the tears. "I would never be able to live with myself knowing that I lived instead of you".
I hadn't realized Mason and Alexis were staring at us by this point until Alexis interrupted me:
"Hey, do you two know each other? I mean before the games?" Alexis asked.
"Yes" I replied.
The Capitol will know that I lied to them, but I'm past caring what the Capitol thinks.
"That's a weird coincidence. Especially considering Eric and Coral were siblings, and Mason and I are cousins. It's like they did it on purpose" Alexis says.
No, that can't be right. The Capitol aren't that sick. Well, maybe they are. It seems too much to be a coincidence.
"You said you didn't know Luca in your interview" Mason observed.
"Well I lied, okay? Stop interrogating me" I said.
"Why did you lie? Did your mentors tell to say that?" Alexis asked.
"No. It was my own idea. I don't have to have someone telling me what to do. I can make my own decisions" I said.
"That doesn't really work out for you, does it?" Luca said.
"Excuse me. What do you mean by that?" I said.
"Where do I begin? What about when you nearly burned down the training center or when you tried to commit suicide or what about the fact that you push away everyone who trying to help you?" Luca said.
"I don't do that" I protested.
"Yes you do" Luca said.
"Shut up! You don't know what I've been through" I countered.
"What you've been through? What about what I've been through? Do you know how hard it was to watch you run away? For all I know it would be the last time I saw you"
"I'm sorry. I didn't-"
"Every time the cannon boomed I thought it was you" Luca interrupted. "Every night I prayed it wasn't your face in the sky. I've been going out of my mind".
The next part I keep playing in my head. He wouldn't stop. He wouldn't stop unless I stopped him. Listening to the truth was torture. I couldn't take it anymore. I slapped him. Hard. And then everything froze. Everyone had a shocked expression on their faces – they weren't as shocked as I was. Alexis let out a little gasp and Mason stepped in between Luca and me, as if I was going to hurt Luca. Even more so than I had.
I never meant to. It was like an outer body experience. Luca was right; I made horrible decisions. I'm out of control.
Luca looked confused and dazed, then his eyes set on me. Those beautiful green eyes filled with rage. He looked at me like he didn't recognize me, as I'm the most disgusting creature he's ever laid eyes on. I'll never be able to burn that image from my mind, it will be permanently engraved on the back of my eyelids.
I eventually fall asleep but I'm awakened again by high pitched screams. Alexis. I jump to my feet and run in the direction of Alexis's screams. Mason is right behind me.
What could have happened? Alexis and Luca were on guard, how could something have went wrong?
I stop short of myself when I spot Alexis. She is staggering around with a blade embedded in her shoulder. She pulls the knife out and the wound starts gushing. I'm completely at a loss, and a little woozy from the sight of blood. Mason runs over to her, takes off his jacket and presses it against her wound. He repeats no no no until it starts to sound like an echo. Luca is nowhere to be seen. Neither is the culprit. I feel a cold blade on my throat and feel a rush of fear sweep over.