I quickly jumped out of my BMW before walking quickly towards the doors of the chapel.
Behind those doors, the funeral service is taking place for Ayla.
I'm around twenty minutes late, crap.
It's been almost a week since she died and I still can't believe it. It feels like I'm stuck in a vivid dream and there's no way of waking up.
"Did you turn up late on purpose?" A voice asks from a few feet to my left. I look over to the girl and give a blank look "well, that makes two of us....so how did you know the deceased?"
Is she serious? She gives off a bad vibe. She also seems slightly intoxicated, but I think that that's just her personality.
The girl looks around my age. She has long wavy chestnut brown hair, green eyes, and wears a black dress.
She looks so familiar to me.
"She was a friend" I finally say.
"And it speaks" the girl smiles with a confident, almost arrogant attitude. "You must be Jason Sanders"
I furrow my brows at her.
Okay, so she knows my name. I guess she goes to my school. Not that my friends are that popular, but we're known, quite well by everyone.
Tyler is the quarterback for the football time, so everyone knows him. Jess runs the art department, so she's known. Duncan is on the football team but is usually a reserve and doesn't actually play.
This chick definitely goes to my school. She could be anybody that knew Ayla.
God, she looks so familiar.
"Do I know you?" I fold my arms, trying to ignore the headache from drinking on the way here.
"Doubt it" she talks quickly, "Ayla never introduced me to her friends"
That's where I know her from.
"Your Ayla's sister?" I realize.
"Guilty" she smirks. "I'm Jacqueline"
Ayla rarely spoke about her family to me in bio, but I remember her saying something about having a younger sister that talks too quickly and can be heartless at times.
"I've never seen you at the hospital" I observe.
"I hate hospitals...funerals, churches, cemeteries, vampire flix" she admits, "basically anything that reminds of my own mortality"
I gulp down. What a strange kid. She may look Ayla but they are nothing alike.
"So you're just going to stand here and wait for the service to finish?" I assume.
"God no" Jacqueline shakes her head, "I'm here to pay my respects than I'm gonna go home to my grieving family"
"Just like that?" I raise a brow.
"Yeah" she nods "I take it you saw the rat"
Rat? She's calling sister's dead child a rat?
"Duncan was able to hold the baby" I explain, "I saw a photo, she was beautiful"
"No baby is" Jacqueline spat, "let alone a preemie"
Is she serious? This is her sister's child, she's talking about. The kid Ayla died for.
"I'm gonna go inside..." I start walking towards the chapel doors.
She's nuts.
"Was she blond?" She cries. I stop in my tracks "Ayla was born with naturally blond hair...So light, it looked like snow"
I turn around to face the girl. In that brief moment, I could hear the pain in her voice and see it in her eyes. She loved Ayla dearly, I see it.
"She didn't have any," I tell her. "But her eyebrows were almost snow white"
Jacqueline almost smiles. "Good to know" she nods, "see you around"
With that, the girl vanishes.
***
"How's he gonna do this?" Jess sighs while we watch Duncan stand by the tombstone.
"With great difficulty," I tell her.
"He'll fall in love, again" Tyler assures, "there will always be a spot reserved for her in his heart...But he won't ever forget about either of them"
"I just want to hug him" Hayden admits, "tell him that's it all gonna be okay"
The last thing he wants is sympathy. He just wants to forget about all this and probably pretend that they never existed.
"I'm gonna go get him" I sigh, before walking up to him, "how are you doing?"
He stands in a black suit with his eyes glued to the tombstone. Salty tears have stained his cheeks and a pink pigment now covers his eyes and nose.
"You grew up without one of your parents," Duncan's tells me, wearing a frown. "You grew up okay"
Eh, I've got some issues to work out.
"Yeah, Duncan" I nod, "my mum died when I was young..."
"....See, I've never lost someone" He admits with tears running down his cheeks, "is it meant to hurt this much?"
To hear him say those words feels like a hit to the gut. I don't ever want to see him in pain.
"I know it's hard to believe right now but you're going to be okay" I lower my voice.
"How can you be so sure?" Duncan asks.
When you're in that much pain it's hard to live or even feel.
Simple tasks become difficult, the people around you become unbearable, the things that you used to enjoy, no longer put a smile on your face.
You stand there wondering what you're going to do now without that person, so you just pretend that you've never lost them.
Its easier that way.
That's what it's like to lose someone.
Duncan's never experienced these feelings. I, on the other hand, am somewhat of an expert. I was a toddler when I lost my mum and I've been losing people ever since.
The more people you lose, the harder it is to love. Your heart becomes chained and you are now what they call the guarded one.
"Oh, trust me" I half-smile, "time heals everything"
"You've lost so many people" Duncan sniffs, "how did you do it? How can you still get out of bed every day and act like you're not hurting?"
It's a challenge, to be honest. It gets harder every day that I'm still here and they're not.
"I promise you, it won't feel this way forever" I assure him.
"I love you, Jason" he sobs.
I sigh. "I love you too, Dunc"
"I'm ready to go home now" he announces as walking straight past me, towards the car.
I look over to my friends who stand stunned. I inhale deeply before reverting my gaze to Ayla's tombstone.
Rest easy, my friend.
-------------------------------------
A/N
To those who are grieving the loss of a loved one — it won't feel this way forever <3
Thank you
- Rose xx