When I wake up the next morning, the smell of bacon and eggs fill my nostrils.
I struggle to open my eyes, but when if do, my vision is blurry. I look to my side to find my clock reading, nine am.
What happened last night?
When I hear chatter from downstairs, I decide to get out of bed.
I climb down the staircase slowly, where I find three mugs of coffee on the counter and a man behind the stove.
Who's he?
I find Aunt Laura setting up three plates onto the table before looking up at me.
"Hey kiddo" she half-smiles.
I furrow my brows when reverting my gaze to the stove to find Raff Marcus turn around to face me.
"Raff? What are you doing here?" I ask.
He smiles warmly. "How bout we eat breakfast and I can explain"
I nod slowly while taking a seat around the table with Aunt Laura. Raff gently places the bacon and eggs onto each of our plates before taking a seat around the kitchen table.
"So what's this about?" I ask, taking a sip from the cup filled with orange juice in front of me.
The bright sun shines through the blinds, highlighting the dust flying through the air.
"I spoke to your friends last night" Aunt Laura starts slowly, looking down at her plate. "They explained to me...What's been going on with you...See, I've been working so many extra shifts so I can pay for you to go to college, I feel like I haven't seen you at all for months now...I didn't realize...Maybe that's my fault"
I shake my head violently. "No, Aunt Laura, none of this is your fault"
She sniffs. "How could I not have known that you've been drinking for months? It's my job to protect and watch over you...I'm sorry Jason, I didn't mean to fail you"
I take her hands. "You didn't fail me...I failed myself"
How could she possibly blame herself for this? It's my fault. I did this to myself. Aunt Laura has done nothing but support and care for me since I moved here.
"You need to stop drinking, Jason" Raff lowers his voice, "If you keep this up, you won't have a future"
"You don't think I know that?" I raise a brow. "I'm trying over here...But I can't stop"
"You need help," He says calmly, "Your friends found you laying in the middle of a parking lot last night. What if you were hit by a car? What if one of these days you get worse than a few bruises and alcohol poisoning?"
"I have a problem... I know that" I admit, "but I don't know what to do about it"
I want to make it all go away. My addiction, my pain, my dependence. I want to wake up without a pounding head and the urge to die.
Raff looks me in the eyes firmly. "Do you want to get better?" He asks.
I can tell that he's not trying to be cruel. He's trying the 'tough love' approach. Maybe that's the only thing that can save me now.
"Of course, I do" I nod.
"Then repeat after me" he orders "my name is Jason Sanders and I'm an alcoholic"
I revert my gaze to Aunt Laura who has tears running down her cheeks. I squeeze her hand before looking back over to Raff. I take a deep breath, while tears stream from the outer corners of my eyes.
"My name is Jason Sanders..." I gulp, "and I'm an alcoholic"
Raff smiles. "You're going to be okay" he assures, "we can take you to an AA meeting where you'll get a sponsor and talk to people that can help you"
I nod slowly while I sit there in tears. "How did it get so out of hand? It was just one drink here and there...Then it became every night, then every morning...Then I couldn't stop...I just wanted to feel numb, it was easier that way"
"It often starts like that" Raff tells me.
"All the secrets and lies were eating me alive" I admit, "I can't keep them in anymore..."
I can't continue to lie about Jimmy or Elise. I can't any more. I'll end up dead if I do.
"What secrets?" Aunt Laura looks up to me, "you can tell me anything, you know that, right?"
I nod slowly. "Last summer, dad sent one of his friends from prison to hound me and my friends"
"What?" Her eyes widen in disbelief.
"We paid him off...I'm pretty sure he thinks I'm dead now..." I admit, "I'm sorry for not telling you"
It's been almost a year since Jimmy came into my life. I haven't had to see him in months now.
"Wait a minute, slow down, I can't believe this," she sighs, "is there anything else?"
Elise.
I nod "I'm sorry Raff, I can't keep it in any more"
Raff nods slowly. "It's okay, Jason"
I look over to Aunt Laura and take a deep breath. "Aunt Laura, about three years ago...I knew Ned's sister, Elise Carter...Chris' girlfriend..." I admit.
Aunt Laura widens her eyes. "What? You knew her, how?"
"Remember when I used to volunteer at that tutoring centre? She um was also a volunteer and..." I take a deep breath, "I know why she looks like Angel and Trisha"
"W—what?" She stutters.
"She looks like Angel because we have the same dad" I announce, "before she died, we took a test and it confirmed it"
"Wait, you know?" She jumps out of her seat.
I follow her actions and jump up in shock. "Wait, you know?"
She sighs.
"I didn't see that one coming" Raff admits.
"How did you know?" I ask her, "why didn't you tell Angel or me?"
Aunt Laura sighs, guzzling down her orange juice.
"Before your mum died...We were at lunch and she looks at me and says that Johnathan has a kid in San Francisco...A daughter"
"You're kidding?" I fold my arms.
"She told me that while they were separated, he slept with his sister's friend Isabel Wilson and got her pregnant...After your mum died, I moved back here and decided to crash one of their parties..."
"You met her?" I ask.
Aunt Laura nods, with tears streaming down her face. "She was so beautiful...I couldn't believe how much she looked like Caroline's little girls...I prayed that Johnathan would never meet her...And I thank God every day that he hadn't because he would have ruined her too"
Because he would have ruined her too.
I can't argue with that statment. Afterall, it is true. My dad ruins everybody he's near. He ruined my mother and Aunt Laura, then went on to ruin my sisters and I.
"And you never told us?" I furrow my brows, "even when Angel tried to impersonate her, you never said anything"
She laughs. "Well, neither did you, so I say we're even"
I wrap my arms around my aunt. "I love you so much, Aunt Laura," I tell her.
"I love you too, kiddo" she sniffs before looking over to Raff. "You knew Elise too... "
Raff nods just as I laugh "he's the doctor who did the DNA test"
"I've known Jason for years, Laura" Raff admits, "long before that day Evangeline got into the accident"
Raff and Elise grew close in her final year. He was in the room when she died. That was the last time I saw him till Evangeline's accident.
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Hi all,
Everything that Laura just said will be shown in her book 'The Honest One' so stay tuned.
Thank you
Happy reading!