August 22, 2009
I stare down at the floor as my legs are hugged to my chest. I have no more tears to cry. I think my eyes have turned into the desert. I can't think right now. I feel a cool hand touch my shoulder. I don't even move, I just can't. "Grace, honey. You need to go home and eat, then maybe sleep some. He will be here for you when you come back." Rosalie says. Her hand rubs my back. Or I guess that's what she is doing. My body is numb at the moment.
I shake my head. "I have to be here if he wakes up, Rose. I can't. If he wakes up and I'm not here, I would never forgive myself." I mutter. I finally look at her. I know she is worried, hell everyone is. Everything was fine, almost perfect the last six months.
"TJ wouldn't want you to neglect yourself. What about CJ and Izzy? They need their Mother. Especially now." Rosalie asks. She pulls me into her arms. I feel tears start to fall again. I bury my head into her chest. A loud sob slips my lips, only to be muffled by Rose's chest.
~Flashback of two days ago~
"Look at them. They will be into everything now that they are crawling." Esme says, crossing her arms across her chest. I snap the baby gate into place, blocking the stairs from my very curious, crawling children. CJ and Izzy are on the floor with all their toys.
"I know. I found Izzy out of her crib this morning and in their closet while CJ was in the bottom drawer of the dresser. It's insane." I let out a laugh. Walking over to the kitchen counter and grabbing sippy cups filled with juice. I walk back over to CJ and Izzy. I squat down onto the blanket. Handing CJ the blue sippy cup and the pink one to Izzy. They both put their cups to their mouths to drink. I lay back against the couch.
Esme smiles. "You are a great Mother. You know that? CJ and Izzy both adore you and TJ. Where is TJ anyways?" She asks. Glancing around to see if he was around.
I let out a sigh." He told me he had something to do today. But he really didn't tell what he was exactly going to do." I roll my eyes. I look down at the babies. They were both mumbling in their secret language. I giggle. CJ couldn't stand not being near his Sister. And Izzy would cry if she wasn't near CJ.
I hear the door to the garage open. Alice rushes in. Panic filling her eyes. But before I could ask, she pulls me to my feet. "Esme can watch CJ and Minnie. You need to get to the hospital now." Her words hit me like a ton of bricks.
"What do you mean, Alice? What happened?" I grab her by my gloved hands. Squeezing rather hard. My heart swells with worry. "Please....tell me."
Alice sighs. She glances at Esme, who was as worried as me. "TJ got in an accident. I think it was your Uncle Caius. He bit TJ....Grace, he needs you now. Carlisle is trying to get all the venom out." She mutters so quickly that I almost didn't catch what she said. My eyes widen at her words. I hear a deafening scream fill the room. Only to acknowledge that it was from me.
~Flashback over~
And here I was standing in the doorway of TJ's hospital room. A few feet away is TJ laying down on the bed. His heart slowly beating, slowly pushing my Uncle's venom further told his heart. Tears fill my eyes as I look my husband over. Tubes are everywhere. Carlisle said that the venom is slowly killing him and every tube hooked up to him helps ease the fire.
I feel my eyes water again. Shit! I have been crying nonstop. I slowly make my way to sit down in the chair that was beside TJ's bed. I lean forward. Grabbing his warm hand. "Please don't leave me, Tyler. I can't....I can't handle losing you." I whisper. Looking down at his hand for any sign of life. But his hand is lifeless in mine. "I love you, TJ so much. Izzy and CJ need you as much as I do. Please come back to me, baby." Tears streak my cheeks. I pull away from his hand. I wipe my eyes that are probably red and swollen, but I didn't care.
I hear a knock at the door. I don't look back to see who it is, I squeeze TJ's hand. Carlisle walks around to the other side of TJ. I feel his eyes on me. I glance up quickly. Carlisle was checking TJ's vitals. I look back down at TJ's face. He looks as if he is sleeping. "Grace, why don't you go home and spend a night with the twins? I will call you if anything changes." Carlisle says. I shake my head. He walks back around. Suddenly I feel something stick me. I glance at my shoulder. Carlisle had stuck a needle into my arm.
My vision blurred. "What did you inject into me?" I heard my words slur. Carlisle frowns at me.
"A sedative. You need rest. And I am sorry that it had to come to this. Emmett, come get her." Carlisle whispers in between my eyelids fighting to close. I feel someone picking me up. I beat my fists against their chest until I couldn't anymore. My eyes droop and I feel myself falling into a deep sleep.
I woke up back in Forks, Washington. Or rather I think it is Forks. I remember the meadow that I am standing in. I glance down. I'm in a yellow sundress that went down to my knees. My hands reaching up to my hair. It was braided down my back. I bite my lip as I glance around. A figure emerges from the trees. Tears fill my eyes.
"TJ!" I shout before I run toward him. TJ opens his arms to me. Engulfing him in a hug. I tilt my head up, kissing him over and over. TJ looks down at me with sadness in his eyes.
"I am dying, Grace. But I had to spend one more day with you. I love you so much." TJ says. I shake my head. I can't believe this. Tears falls from my eyes."Don't cry Baby." His hands cup my face, wiping my tears away.
"CJ and Izzy need you. I need you.... You can't leave us." I pull away from him. I was starting to get angry that he wasn't fighting. I cover my mouth, fighting back a sob.
"I know, Grace. I can't fight anymore. The venom has attacked every organ but the heart. The heart is last...I want to fight. I love you and our babies. You don't know how much happiness you have given my in the last year. I wish I could have forever with you." TJ grabs my hand from my mouth. He pulls me to him once more. " If I was human, I would wake up tomorrow and be a vampire. But I'm a shapeshifter. Vampire venom can kill me, not turn me. I'm sorry Baby." He leans down kissing me.
I bring my fists up to his chest and start punching him as hard as I can. TJ lets me get my frustrations out. I finally get too tired to punch him. Panting and leaning my head onto his chest. "Why?" I breath out.
"You lost Xander and were able to move on. To love me. Now I am asking you, please Grace. Take care of our babies and move on. Live your life. Love again. Thats all I ask. I want my Family to be happy." TJ says in a low tone. Suddenly I can't speak. No sound comes out when I open my mouth. "Now about what happens after I die, I want to be buried with my Brothers in La Push." He smiles at me. My vision turns black.
I jolt up from the bed. Sweat coating my head and neck. It was only a dream. But it felt so real. I glance around. I am in TJ and my bedroom. I slide out of bed. Walking into the bathroom. I lean against the sink. Turning on the water, I splash water onto my face. I glance up at the mirror. There was a post it note on the mirror.
CJ and Izzy are with Esme. Take a shower, eat something then I will take you back to TJ.
-Alice
I let out a sigh. I'm tired of crying. I won't cry now. I strip out of my clothes. Stepping into the shower. I turned on the water, letting the hot water warm me up. I think about TJ in my dream. Could I really move on? In the last two years, I have had to let go of Xander, even though I barely started dating him. Then my Father had to kidnap me, his own daughter. And I killed him. Out of all that bad, I was able to meet TJ. We fell in love like magic. Old wolf magic that is. We got married a little over a year ago. Then we have our babies. CJ and Izzy are everything to us. This isn't all that I wanted or what I need. I want my forever with my husband. I need him by my side. Our children need him.
We were supposed to have forever.
In a fantasy world, TJ would wake up tomorrow and be healthy. I would bring him home to me. I would cook some soup, accidentally burn it and have to order take out instead. Then TJ and I would cuddle CJ and Izzy until they fall asleep in our arms.
But this isn't the fantasy world. In reality, TJ won't make it another day. And by the end of the week, I will have to bury my husband. I will be a widow and my children will be Fatherless. I jump as I am brought out of my thoughts when I hear a knock on my bathroom door. My teeth were chattering from the now cold shower that I was standing in. The water falling on on me covered my tears.
***I know this is short, sorry about that. I hope your ready for what is next. Do you think TJ will really die? Or will he make it through? There is a picture of the babies on the side. Aren't they cute? Comment and Vote!!!!! Thanks for making Volturi Goddess so special. Two more chapters and it will be over. Well this book will be at least.***