I had readied myself mentally for this since the day I informed on the situation, two and a half weeks ago. Though I convinced myself that I was prepared, I truly wasn't. I avoided my eyes in the mirror as I dry heaved over the sink, stressing. Then again, even though I have visited my father's house many of times, I suddenly felt so small standing in the bathroom. I closed the eyes and placed my hands on the cool surface of the sink, taking in deep breaths to try and calm my raging nerves.
Two strong, warm hands placed themselves at my shoulders and began massaging my tense muscles. As he hit a particular knot, I groaned and began to relax under his hands. His scent lingered over me, blanketing me in it, reminding me that he was here to help and protect me.
"You were worrying me." He said as he pulled me to his chest. "I was calling for you but you never answered."
"I'm worrying myself." I tried to joke weakly and sent him a weary smile in the mirror.
"That's not funny." He reminded me, pulling me closer and placing a palm on my stomach. "You shouldn't be stressing over this. It's not good for the baby."
"I know." I whispered and placed a hand over his, resting it on my slightly protruding stomach.
"You promised me that you could handle this." He reminded.
"I though I could." I whispered again, disappointed in myself. I promised myself that I could handle this and that I wouldn't worry him. He had enough on his plate at the moment.
"You know that I am here for you and that you can come to me during these things." It wasn't a question at all, the stated fact flowed through his lips and into my ears.
"I know."
"You also know that I love you, right?"
"Yes, and I love you too."
"Then please stop trying to take everything alone. You're not alone anymore. Even after all of these years together you still keep yourself bottled up."
"Forced habit?" He sighed heavily, his warm breath tickling my ear.
"What am I going to do with you?" He muttered and brushed his lips against my cheek, his stubble slightly scratching my skin. His other hand wrapped around to join his other, his thumbs rubbing my stomach. His eyes closed and his head came to rest upon my shoulder, listening, a smile on his lips. He often did, listening to our pup's heart beat or to feel their emotions when they grew old enough for the bond to form.
"Momma? Grandpa said that its time." Rosiline called from the other side of the door.
"Thank you, baby. Can you go tell grandpa that we will be out in a minute?" Orion responded.
"Okay, Daddy!" Her light footsteps trailed down the wall, giggling when my dad lifted her up.
"Are you going to be okay? We can always wait to visit when you are ready." I turned in his arms and planted a soft kiss to his lips. My eyes fluttered open and I gazed softy up at him, my hands lying on his chest.
"No, I have to do this. I have to be there for this. I'll be just fine. You'll be there with me." His green eyes lit up brightly as he looked down at me. The bond opened further, not only showering the both of us with tingles and warmth, but it also allowed me to feel his adoration for me.
"Promise?" He teased me, raising an eyebrow.
"I promise." I grinned up at him.
The sun was just beginning to set when we all made our way outside. The dusk sun was a bright, burning orange, accentuating the warm others of the leaves that associated with fall. She was amused when her kids agreed that it looked as if they were walking through a crayon box.
The small group made their way up rolling hills that led into the valley. The waterfall at the top was just as beautiful as they had describe. The most at the bottom still held its rainbow, even with the sun's fading rays unable to supply it properly. It was her mother's favorite, the sole reason for why she and her family were here.
Fall had been her favorite and this place held her peace, her serenity. It was the night of the crescent moon, which was her favorite phase. I have been told everything by everyone but it was only just now that her body has been recovered.
Here, under the crescent moon in the peak of Autumn is when she will finally regain her peace. Both this pack and my own had searched for several days, looking for where that beast had laid her to rest in madness. It was disgusting to see how she was just carelessly tossed into the earth below a shroud of trees, away from the moon's view. She had been buried with now honor.
Though now, she will finally get what she deserves. A proper burial with the ones she is loved by, cherished by, instead of with the hands of her murderer. It is now where she will be placed in her pack, in her place, under her moon.
We placed her gently into the ground, her remains covered blanket that held the pack's crest. We covered her with her land's dirt before placing a bed of white lilies over top of her. It was now that we hoped that she will finally have her peace.
I leaned down and kissed the top of the stone used to mark her grave. I whispered a prayer to the Goddess, asking her to accept her soul into the sky, among her people and those who had fallen before her.
"May you be at peace as the one of the stars alongside the moon. I love you, mom."