After finding out that we don't have classes until next week Monday (after the weekend) to prepare for the exams, I decided to call my dad and telling him that I would be coming.
It was a hard decision really cause I also want to go home to visit my mom, but I mean I haven't seen Chris and dad in such a long time so I guess I had to make that sacrifice.
I don't know how to feel though. Should I tell mom? I don't think so. I'll just visit on another weekend to make myself feel better.
Should I be excited to see dad? I haven't seen him since the end of my junior year. That was almost three years ago. I wonder what's changed.
Probably a lot.
I remember I had a best friend there. His name was Jacob. I wonder if he's still around. He lived next door to my dad's house and we would always hang out when I was around. He was so cool and so cute. I may or may not have had a crush on him. I don't really remember.
He lived with his older brother... I think his name was Monty. I wasn't really familiar with him though. I guess it would be nice to see them too.
"Hello? Are you listening to me?" I'm snapped out of my dreamland by Kathrine waving a hand in front of my face.
"Sorry, what?"
She puts down the unfamiliar pink teddy bear on my bed "I was saying I got this for you. Well Nathan did, but I didn't like it so now I'm giving it to you"
I raise a confused brow "Why me?"
"You don't have teddy bears on your bed"
We are currently resided in my room and speaking about nothing in particular. Kyle knows she's here and didn't seem to mind. Things change, huh? Or maybe he's just not in the mood to bother with me since I never listen to him anyways.
Either way, I'm happy.
"I don't want teddy bears on my bed. I have 6 very comfortable pillows" I tell her snuggling myself with one of them.
She also does the same grinning "I'll admit, they're very comfy. Remember I used to steal them when we still lived together"
"Yep" I giggle "You liked the purple one"
She laughs at the memory before turning to look at me "So what's going on between you and Kyle?"
"Like how?" I ask confused.
She shrugs "I don't know. You guys are so weird. Are you friends or not?"
"I don't know" I also shrug "He doesn't really give much away. Sometimes we're cool and other time he's being his usual rude and cold self. It's been less frequent now though"
"He looks like a lot to handle"
I snort "He is. But I like him. He's cool. And at least now you know he isn't some God with no flaws like you though he was"
"He doesn't like me, does he?" She frowns knowingly.
"He thinks you're trouble" I explain awkwardly, not wanting to lie to her "But it doesn't matter because he doesn't even know you like that"
"Why?" She asks defensively.
I shrug "I don't know. Maybe Nathan tells him all the freaky stuff you two get up to. I wouldn't be surprised"
Her eyes widen in horror "You think?"
"I'm kidding" I laugh "Unless he really does. You should probably ask him"
"I swear to God I'll kill him if he does"
I chuckle amused "Why? You tell me. Even when I don't ask. Which is actually like all the time"
"We're girls, we can speak about these things" She defends "They can't. Can you imagine him saying something about my vagina to Kyle"
I laugh loudly, having to cover my mouth "I would give anything to see Kyle's reaction if he does"
"You're not helping" She scowls loudly.
"Jeez sorry" I hold in my laugh "I don't think he goes into detail about it. Maybe he just goes 'dude, Kat and I made such sweet love last night' or something"
She barks out a laugh "Oh my gosh. No one says that, you virgin!"
"Whatever" I defend before joining in on her laughing. It's infectious like that.
"Okay but seriously, are you still a virgin?"
"Yes" I reply exasperated "Who could I have possibly lost it to? If it was Noah, I'm pretty sure you would've known"
She raises a brow "Well, why didn't you?"
"I never felt ready" I explain thoughtfully "This other time we almost did it but then I panicked and pushed him away. It was so embarrassing"
"What do you mean 'almost did it'? Like did he have his you-know-what against your you-know-what?" She asks curiously.
I nod shyly "Yeah. It was so weird. Everything was set. He even had a condom on"
Her eyes widen "Oh my gosh. I never knew you guys went that far far. Neither of you told me about this. Why do you think you panicked?"
"I don't know. It was just so embarrassing"
She rubs a hand down my arm "Don't worry, it happens to the best of us"
"Not when you've been with the person for so long" I frown "Seriously Kathrine, what the fuck is my problem? I loved him and he loved me? What was missing?"
She hums sympathetically "Only you know, Chels"
"After that incident I could see he was scared to even lay a finger on me" I admit embarrassed "It was the worst"
"Don't think about it. It's over now" She coos softly.
I can't stop thinking about!
"I mean what was the big deal anyways? It's just sex. Everyone does it. You do it. Kyle does it all the time. Nicholas does it all the time too. What was the big deal with me?" I can't help but rant agitated and annoyed with myself.
"Chelsea. It doesn't matter anymore" She scolds "It's not your fault you weren't ready. It happens"
I frown shaking my head "Oh my gosh, I was such a horrible girlfriend"
"Stop it" She points a stern finger at me.
I stick a hand out "I think I need the teddy bear now"
She smiles softly before handing it to me and I clutch it tightly between my hands and ditch my pillow before snuggling into it. The soft material calms me down immediately. And the teddy bear itself, with that cute little smile and the ribbon tied around it's neck.
"Better?" Kat asks.
I nod pouting "Yes"
"Honey! I'm home"
That's definitely Nathan's voice. But what is he doing here? My suspicion are confirmed when he enters my bedroom door, Kat's eyes immediately light up before he jumps on my bed and envelops her into an affectionate hug.
"Babe" She grins and soon they're making out with him straddling her and her legs wrapped around his waist. And they're crushing my poor pillows!
It's like they hadn't seen the other in decades.
"Eww! You guys will not do that on my bed" I screech but they just carry on.
I look in front of me to see Kyle watching them with an unreadable expression. I give him a look for help and he scowls "Don't involve me"
"They probably have more sex than I do" Nicholas is the next to appear as he watches them shaking his head.
I push Nathan away from Kat "Okay, seriously! You two are crushing my pillows. Go do this elsewhere"
They pull back from each other with swollen lips and red faces "Oops, got carried away" Kat excuses lamely causing me to roll my eyes.
Nathan helps his girlfriend up from my bed.
"What are you all doing here anyways?" I ask.
"We came from gym then Kyle made the mistake of telling Nathan that Kathrine was here and he got way too excited so we had to make a stop" Nick explains.
I'm not surprised. Those two are obsessed with each other.
"Yeah cause he's a pussy like that" Kyle adds.
Nathan flips them both off "You guys get a girlfriend like mine before you start judging me, losers."
Nick tseks amused "You forget you were just like us a few months ago"
I'm guessing 'just like us' means he was hooking up with any girl with a pulse. Which is actually true.
Kind of.
"Well he's changed now so the both of you should too" Kat kisses his cheek causing all of us to fake-gag. "You guys are jealous"
"Chels, you forget this was you too a few months ago with your lover boy" Nathan adds in.
"Yeah but we didn't make out in front of everyone like the two of you"
I hear Kyle sigh before snapping my eyes to him because I know he wants to say something "Did you guys ever make out?"
What the fuck?
"Did you ever not have sex with just any girl?" I retort defensively.
"Yes, actually. You."
I scoff incredulously "Yeah cause I don't want to have sex with you. That's gross. You're gross. And God knows how many diseases you're walking around with"
"I swear you two were fine just yesterday" Kat notes thoughtfully, watching our little argument.
"They do this sometimes" Nick says.
"Why are you guys still in my room?" I demand loudly; annoyed to hell and back at Kyle's stupid remarks. How dare he?
It's like he overheard me talking about my insecurities about mine and Noah's sexual life.
"Jeez" Nick breathes with wide eyes, probably not expecting that from me "We'll leave"
"Clutch the teddy bear, it will make you feel
better" Kat advises softly directing her eyes to it.
Nathan follows her gaze "Wait, babe? Isn't that the one I got you?"
She shrugs sheepishly.
"Whatever. You losers can see yourselves out"
Kyle says before walking out my bedroom and into his.
"Okay, Nathan, I will kill your friend if he keeps treating mine like trash" Kat threatens when he's gone.
"Just ignore him, he'll get better"
Nick snorts "No he won't. Plus, Chels, you're the one who said he was walking around with diseases"
Yeah, not my best moment.
"Dude, you're not helping" Nathan narrows his eyes at him before looking at me "Chels, you just gotta ignore the guy. He's like that sometimes, plus he just spoke to his mom on the phone earlier and that always puts him in a bad mood for some reason"
Ohh. I know he was rude to me, but I can't help but understand. He's always like that after speaking to his mom, probably because she mentioned his dad.
"Whatever" I mutter dismissing my sympathetic thoughts "Sorry for being rude earlier. You guys can stay if you want to"
They all grin. They actually wanted to? That's kind of sweet.
"So, Nick, any progress with Wins?" Nathan asks his friend.
"Dude, what do you mean 'any progress'? You know she has a girlfriend" Nick scowls in response.
He opted to go sit on my beanbag and Nathan took the other while Kat and I are laying down on the edge of the bed watching them, with our hands holding our faces and our feet in the air.
"Nick, we have to tell you something" Kat blurts and I narrow my eyes at her. She looks at me apologetically but looks like she's still going to continue.
If she tells him what I think she is..
"Kathrine, I swear to God" I hiss impatiently, my face hardening and my heartbeat quickening.
Nick notices the tension "What is it? Tell me"
"Kat" I warn again sternly when she is about to open her mouth "It's not your fucking place to tell him!"
"Someone has to do it" She defends, switching her position so she is sitting cross-legged on my bed.
This girl! Why did I tell her?
"Babe, what's going on?" Nathan asks confused and alarmed. I don't think he's ever seen us fight before.
"Nothing. I just have to tell him something"
I breath deeply; annoyed "Why do you even want to tell Nicholas so bad? This has nothing to do with him"
"Yes so let me tell him" She argues.
"Fucking hell, tell me what?" Nick snaps.
I shake my head dreadfully.
Kat looks at him and then her mouth opens slowly "Dee cheated on Winnie at Betty's party"
She did it. She actually did it.
Nick's eyes widen and so does his mouth. He doesn't say anything for a while "What?! Does Winnie know? They looked fine just yesterday. Bro, what the fuck?"
"Dee hasn't told her" I reply.
"What the fuck? Why haven't you? Do you know how upset Winnie will be when she finds out that you knew? This is the secret that you and Kyle were keeping from me, isn't it?"
I've never seen him look so angry.
"It's not my place to tell her" I defend loudly, feeling like this is the 100th I'm having to say this. "And it sure as hell wasn't Kathrine's either to tell you"
"I'm going to tell her" He finalizes after a while
of clenching and unclenching his jaw.
"No you're not, Nicholas" I snap.
"Do you think I fucking want to?" He defends.
"Actually I think you do" I retort sharply, disregarding my own harsh words "Anything to get Dee out of the equation, right?"
He laughs bitterly "Wow. I should've known that's what you'd think. Maybe I want to tell Winnie because I've known her all my life and it would crush her if she found out that I knew and didn't tell her. Just maybe"
"Okay I think we all need to breathe" Nathan intervenes looking between the two of us who are now way too angry to even hear anything else.
"You're not telling her" I repeat lower.
He gives me a challenging look "I am"
"The fuck you're not"
It's Kyle. He must've heard all the commotion.
Nick looks at him furiously "Dude. Why the fuck haven't you? Do you know how much this is going to crush her?"
"You heard what Chelsea-Anne said, it's not our place" He says "No one in this room is telling her"
We're actually agreeing on something.
"I can't believe the two of you" Nick breathes.
"I really think you guys should tell her" Kat agrees with him.
I narrow my eyes at her "I don't think you have any leverage to speak right now after your little stunt"
"Why the fuck did you even tell her?" Kyle asks me.
I sigh, seriously asking myself the same "Had I known she would do this, I wouldn't have"
"Clearly Kathrine is the only true friend to Winnie and I in this room" Nick bites accusingly "You two are fucking cowards"
"I really think we should all calm down" Nathan says again. Poor guy.
Kat then looks to have an idea because she snaps her eye to her boyfriend "Babe. Since it's 2 against 2 in telling Winnie or not. Your vote is the deciding one"
"No" I screech "You're not dragging him into this. There is no telling Winnie"
"I'm not talking to you" She retorts.
"Yeah, man, speak" Nick adds on.
Nathan sighs awkwardly "Err, I really don't want to get involved"
"There. Now leave him alone" Kyle says.
"... but Chels and Kyle are right, it's not your place" He continues causing me to breathe a sigh of relief.
Thank you, Nate.
"Babe. Are you kidding me?" Kat hisses.
"Debate fucking over. We are not telling Winona" Kyle narrows his eyes at Kat and Nick "If you guys do, so help me God"
Nick gets up "Fuck you guys. I'm leaving"
"Me too" Kat also gets up.
"You have absolutely no right to be mad, missy" I shout after her when she stomps out after Nicholas.
Nathan shrugs apologetically before following the two of them out, leaving just Kyle and I.
He shakes his head when I look at.
"I really didn't know she would tell him. And I still don't know why she did it. She was team-Dee just a few weeks ago" I defend helplessly.
"She's crazy" He says.
I sigh "I've never seen Nick so angry. It was kind of unnerving"
"He'll be fine. He gets like that when it come to Winona"
"Do you think he wants to tell her with the right intentions or just to get Dee out of the equation?"
He looks thoughtful "Honestly, I think it's a bit of both. But to be fair, even if he didn't have feelings for her, I think he'd still want to. It is the right thing to do after all"
"Do you think we're being cowards?"
"Do you?" He asks.
I shrug thoughtfully "Kind of. Maybe we should've just made Dee tell Winnie on the spot. Right there and then when she showed up looking for us"
"They were both kind of drunk. I don't think it would've worked out effectively"
"I guess you're right" I hum.
Today was a lot, huh?