It was somewhere around midnight that Arthur woke up, someone shaking his shoulder. "G'way, Merlin," he said, less than half awake, batting the person's hand away, "M'not ready t'be up, yet."
"That's very nice, Arthur," said Gwaine's voice, "Think it through."
Arthur sat up, glaring at Gwaine.
"Morning," said the knight, "We have a bit of a problem."
"What sort of problem?" Arthur asked. The fire in his fireplace was still lit, shedding light over the room. It was amazing how often that sort of thing happened with a competent servant tiptoeing around. Arthur hated it. He stood, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.
"The sort where Elyan fell asleep in the hall," said Gwaine, "And, um, when he went in to see if everything was all right, Gaius was somewhat the only one in the room."
"What?"
"I mean to say, that we've looked," said Gwaine, shifting, "And there may or may not have been any sign of him –"
"Are you saying that no one knows where Merlin is?" Arthur asked, voice low, dangerous.
Gwaine, in a rare moment of perception, fidgeted nervously from foot to foot. "It's not that we don't know where he is," said Gwaine, "It's just that we've, ah, temporarily misplaced him and are in the process of relocating him, and he may or may not be a bit lost at this very moment – "
"What do you mean we've lost Merlin?"
"I, um, I don't," Gwaine said, and pointed, "Look! Found him."
Arthur turned to follow Gwaine's finger. The reprimand for pulling such a stupid vanishing stunt like that was on the tip of his tongue, but one look at his manservant was enough to change his mind. Merlin had his back pressed against the wall next to the door like it was the only thing in the world keeping him standing. "Merlin?"
"I'm sorry," Merlin said, swallowing thickly, "I think I've done something bad."
"What are you talking about?" asked Gwaine. "You look awful."
His eyes were wide, his breathing heavy. "Morgause," he said, spitting out the words like they were hurting him, "She was here again. She, she said...and I remembered..."
"Morgause?" Arthur said, and cursed, "Where? When? Are you alright? Gwaine –"
Sword drawn, Gwaine ran into the hall, saying, "I'm on it."
Arthur began to walk towards Merlin, reaching out to him, but the warlock flinched away. Arthur held up his hands, and said, "I'm not going to hurt you."
Merlin nodded, a faint blush on his cheeks.
"But I need you to focus, and just tell me what happened," said Arthur, "You can sit. Do you want to sit?"
Merlin hesitated, and then nodded again slowly.
"Okay," he said, "Let's just move over this way, then."
He reached out and grabbed hold of Merlin's elbow, towing him over by the chair. Merlin resisted, staying pressed against the wall, but then followed Arthur. He sat and, more than a little bit shaky, rested his forehead on his palm.
"Merlin, I need you to tell me what's happened," said Arthur, "So calm down, focus, and talk to me. What happened?"
And Merlin told him, but then he stopped, and jumped to his feet, pacing, before he got to the end. "She took some of my blood, in the dungeon," said Merlin, "And she...I've...Arthur, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't – "
"You're rambling again," Arthur said, watching him moving back and forth and back again. "I need you to focus. She took your blood? What does that mean? I mean, I know it can't be good."
"I don't know what it means," said Merlin, voice low, "But sh-she made me swear, Arthur, I didn't know what I was doing, I don't think I did, anyway, but I'm sorry, I'm, she made me – "
"Breathe, Merlin," said Arthur, "Focus. What happened?"
"She made me swear to serve her," Merlin whispered, and Arthur could barely hear him, "Her and Morgana, and sh-she m-made me swear in blood."
"What?" Arthur said.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to," Merlin said, and then stopped, looking horrified. "Oh, oh, God."
"Merlin."
"What if I did mean to? What if that's why I don't remember? What if –"
"Merlin," Arthur said, but Merlin just continued to ramble on and on. Arthur just reached forward and grabbed Merlin's shoulders. "Merlin."
Merlin stopped talking.
"You've gone and promised your loyalty to a sorceress. All we can do is deal with it, okay?" said Arthur, "You were hurt and you were scared and you were hopeless, and you had every reason to be. Also, contrary to what you seem to believe, you are not a knight. You have not been trained to deal with this kind of thing. You probably didn't even know what you were agreeing to when you did it. You did what you had to do to stay alive. You aren't to blame for any of this, and you aren't to believe anyone who says differently. Especially not Morgause."
"But," Merlin answered, blinking rapidly, "But that means I've betrayed you, Arthur, that she could make me betray you even further, and, and –"
"And it's my fault you're in this situation in the first place," said Arthur, "Shall we call it even?"
Merlin...stopped. His mouth was hanging open and he blinked at Arthur. It went on for long enough that Arthur became seriously concerned that Merlin had checked out for good this time. And then...then Merlin laughed. And not just a small snort or a chuckle, but a full blown laugh that made his eyes fill with tears and made him tip over slightly, leaning against the table to support his weight and turning red in the face.
It was so unexpected that Arthur found a smile tugging at his own mouth. Soon enough, Arthur was laughing just as hard as Merlin was, doubling over so his hands were on his knees. They both laughed and laughed, even though it wasn't funny. It really, really wasn't. After all, they were laughing about Arthur screaming at Merlin that he would kill him and about Merlin pledging his powers to a dark sorceress who wanted to overthrow the kingdom. But neither of them seemed to be able to stop.
"Oh, my ribs, my ribs," Merlin gasped between laughs. "It hurts."
It just made them howl even more.
Eventually, Arthur got control of himself, wiping at his eyes. Just after that, Merlin's laughter turned to sobbing, with him still leaning against the table. Arthur walked over, and pushed him down onto a chair. Then, standing next to him, Arthur just laid a hand on his shoulder, and waited. He said nothing. After all, there was really nothing for him to say.
Later, shortly after the sun had rose, Arthur had brought Merlin back to Gaius's chambers. There was no sign of Morgause. All of the knights who had gone looking for the warlock were there, along with Gwen and Gaius, listening as Merlin stuttered more than told what happened.
"So, basically," said Gwaine at the end of it, "You are owned by the bitch."
"Witch," said three different voices at the same time, all the same level of practiced monotony.
"Stop doing that," Gwaine snapped, "That's what I said!"
"But not my magic," Merlin said, ignoring them, "She couldn't. The, um, it was the chains."
"Chains?" Arthur said, and his stomach lurched with the word. He remembered them, heavy and harsh, wrapped around Merlin's arms and legs.
"Merlin was held with chains that were enchanted to keep his magic in," said Gaius. Merlin began tapping fingers on the table again, until Gwen reached over and wrapped her fingers around his. "However, they also stopped his magic from being drawn out. In short, she has the physical loyalty of Merlin, but none of the magic."
"The binding that wasn't finished," said Arthur.
"Exactly."
"But why did she need the blood?" Gwen asked, still holding onto Merlin's hand.
"Any number of reasons," said Gaius, "With a supply of Merlin's blood, she and Morgana could do any amount of terrible things. Most enchantments and spells that use blood are a part of very dark, very black magic."
"What do we need to be expecting, though?" said Gwaine, leaning on the back of Merlin's chair. "I mean, what can they do to him?"
"Anything," said Merlin flatly. "Illnesses, pain...they could cook me from the inside out, or freeze me, or –"
"In short," Lancelot said, cutting in, "Very bad things."
Gwen's knuckles were white with the grip she kept clutched around Merlin's hand. "So what can we do?" she said.
"Kilgarrah," said Gaius, and Merlin tensed. The old man glanced at him apologetically before continuing, "I didn't want to bring it up before because I didn't think you had the strength to ride out to meet him. Now, though..."
"Who's Kilgarrah?" asked Arthur. He looked over at Lancelot, who, abandoning their feud for the moment, shrugged in equal confusion.
"A long story," said Merlin, "Gaius, shouldn't we talk about this later? When there's less – later?"
"They know about the magic, Merlin, I hardly think that now is the time to keep secrets," said Gaius, "Besides, it isn't like they're going to let you ride out into the forest at night with no one but an old man for company."
"Wait, wait," said Arthur, "Merlin isn't riding out into the forest at all, even with a full battalion with him. Whoever this Kilgarrah is, he can just as easily be brought here."
"Not as easy as you'd think," said Merlin, a small grin pulling at the corner of his mouth. Gaius looked equally amused. "He's, uh, he's a bit noticeable."
"Is he," said Arthur, and stopped, "I assume he uses magic, like you do."
"In a manner of speaking," said Merlin. "But –"
"And," Arthur continued, cutting him off, "Based off of how you're
"Not exactly," said Merlin, eyes twitching anywhere but Arthur's face, "He's been presumed dead for several years now, and for him to just...appear would probably cause something of a stir."
Gaius snorted.
"Merlin, really," Arthur said, rolling his eyes, "It doesn't matter how memorable this person is. I will do everything in my power to sneak him here. Anything's better than sending you, out into the forest. At night."
"You may want to know what you're promising to do," Gaius said, "Before you go swearing things like that."
"I would," said Arthur, close to yelling, "If either of you would tell me anything about what's going on and who Kilgarrah is!"
"Kilgarrah's the Great Dragon," said Merlin, all signs of levity gone, voice so soft that Arthur almost missed it. He stared down at the table in front of him, "The one I told you that you killed."
"See? I told you it wouldn't be a problem to sneak him...in...here...oh," Arthur said, Merlin's words getting through to him. "Oh, I, um – What?"
"Oh, dear," said Gwaine, "I think you've broke his brain, Merlin."
"The great what?"
"So...smuggling him in is out, then," said Lancelot.
"What?"
"How does one go about finding a dragon?" asked Elyan.
"There's really only one failsafe way," said Gaius, "A Dragonlord calls him."
"But the last Dragonlord is dead," said Arthur. His thoughts were still banging around his head incoherently.
"That's what you would've said about the dragon five minutes ago," pointed out Percival.
"There's another Dragonlord? Who? Where?" he said, very close to yelling. Then, his eyes landed on Merlin, still staring resolutely down at the tabletop. "You?"
"A bit, yes," said Merlin. Gwen had yet to release her grip, even though she had gotten pale and was staring at Merlin like she had never seen him before. But then he pulled his hand away and stood up. They all pretended not to be watching him closely, should he stumble or fall. "Look, it doesn't even matter, because it probably won't work anyway."
"Why do you say that?" said Gwaine.
"My, um," Merlin stopped.
"His magic hasn't been working," finished Gaius for him, "Not since he was returned here. But I think that we should at least try, Merlin. Dragonlord powers aren't connected to the rest of your magic, you know that."
"Yes, but," he trailed off, biting his lower lip nervously, "But –"
"We'll ride out when the sun goes down," said Arthur, cutting in, "Elyan and Percival, I need you to stay here in case my father notices I've gone. Get Leon to help you. Gwen, it's probably best that you stay here as well."
She nodded. Gwaine, meanwhile, slapped Merlin on the shoulder. "Don't worry, Merlin, we'll talk to this dragon, get your blood back from Arthur's sister and her sister, and then you'll be right as rain and won't have to worry about being unexpectedly broiled," said Gwaine, and then paused, tilting his head to the side, "...Which is not a sentence that I ever thought I'd say."
So it was that the following night found Lancelot, Gwaine, Gaius, Arthur, and Merlin riding out into the woods to talk with the dragon. When Merlin called out to it, it made the hair on the back of Arthur's neck stand on end. He tried to tell himself he was being ridiculous – he'd known Merlin had magic, after all. But still, seeing the actual thing happen in front of him was a new matter entirely.
Had Merlin been the one that had let the dragon free? Why had he let it go afterwards? Arthur wanted to ask, but he didn't want to break the tenuous and fragile trust that Merlin had held out to him by seeking out Arthur after the incident with Morgause. There was also the way that Lancelot kept glaring at him, keeping his horse between Arthur and Merlin's at all times as if daring the prince to try something.
"I'm telling you," Merlin was saying, now, "This isn't going to work."
"I disagree," said Lancelot.
"Do you?" Merlin said, looking over at the knight, "And what makes you such an expert?"
Wordlessly, Lancelot pointed. The dragon was dropping down towards the clearing. Arthur stumbled backwards a step. He'd forgotten how big the beast was. No, not beast. Kilgarrah. The dragon. Who Arthur had not killed.
"I warned you, young warlock," said Kilgarrah, as soon as he was on the ground, ignoring all of the others, "I told you that only terrible things would come of this."
"Did you?" said Merlin, frowning, "When? The last time I talked to you was when Morgana took the city."
"Do not play games with me," the dragon hissed, "You were very rude to me then, and if this is some kind of human joke, consider me completely unamused."
"He isn't joking," Arthur said, before he had time to consider the consequences of talking back to a dragon. He moved to stand next to Merlin. "He doesn't remember."
The dragon lowered his head to stare solidly at Merlin. "You don't, do you?" he said. Arthur was taken aback at the new gentle tone that the dragon began to talk with. It almost sounded like the beast was worried about Merlin. Arthur had to choke back a laugh – he had been right in thinking that everyone worried about Merlin, even dragons worried about Merlin.
Merlin shook his head. "Some," he said, "It comes back in pieces."
"The witches did this to you?" Kilgarrah said.
Merlin shrugged. "They hurt me, yes," he said, "But I think that the memory thing is me. Is there anything you can tell me?"
"Perhaps," said the dragon, "Some months past you called me here. You said that you had been banished from the city. That Arthur Pendragon had spurned you from Camelot in hatred. Now concentrate. What did I tell you?"
Arthur felt a burning mixture of anger and terrible, terrible guilt stirring in his stomach. "We already told you, he doesn't –"
"A half can't truly hate that which makes it whole," Merlin said softly. "Wasn't it?"
"It was," said Kilgarrah. Arthur shut his mouth with a click. The dragon continued, "And you still insisted that the opposite was true, and that I take you from here."
"I was with you," said Merlin, "Those first three weeks?"
"First week and some days," Kilgarrah said.
Merlin shut his eyes, brow creased in concentration. "I...I left. I was annoyed," he said, opening his eyes. "Why was I so annoyed?"
"Because you refused to listen to me," the dragon said, "I told you, time and time again, that your staying away from Camelot and denying your destiny would only lead to terrible things. You didn't believe me. And you were very rude to me."
"What did I do?" Merlin asked.
"You called me a cantankerous, pandering old lizard, informed me you've met rocks who possessed greater clarity than I, and proceeded to storm away," Kilgarrah said, sniffing slightly, "I do not appreciate being insulted in such a manner."
Gwaine snorted. Kilgarrah glared. The knight shifted slightly from foot to foot, and said, "I'm sorry, it's just...it's funny."
Kilgarrah continued to glare.
"Shutting up," said Gwaine, clearing his throat awkwardly. Lancelot and Gaius both stayed perfectly silent.
"I warned you, Merlin," said Kilgarrah, "I warned you that only bad would come of it."
"What good is a warning that I don't remember?" Merlin asked.
"You denied your destiny," Kilgarrah said, "By leaving Camelot you brought this on yourself –"
"Hey," Arthur snarled, drawing his sword before he had time to think his actions through, "None of this is Merlin's fault."
"You are just as much to blame, Arthur Pendragon," said Kilgarrah, turning his vicious gaze on Arthur, "You both are. You almost ruined everything, and I while I feel for you, Merlin, for your current condition, I take no responsibility. Look to yourselves for that."
Arthur glanced over at Merlin. He was staring down at the ground intently, good hand clenched in a fist. "What about my magic?" Merlin said, "Is it not working my fault as well?"
"You were able to call me here," said Kilgarrah, "Your magic is still there."
"But why won't it work?"
"I assume the witches used some sort of spell or enchantment to keep you from your magic, did they not?"
"They did," said Merlin, "Chains."
"Then it is a rather simple answer," said Kilgarrah, "Your magic has been as abused as the rest of you. Give it time to heal and regain its strength. It will return eventually. But if you try to push it, it will only make things worse. I'm telling you this in the hope that you listen to me for once, Merlin. However, I doubt that is the case."
Merlin went back to staring at his boots like they were the most captivating thing that he had ever seen.
"Right, well, as informative as this has been," said Gwaine, apparently forgetting he was supposed to be in a state of 'shutting up', "When is someone going to ask what we do about the blood situation?"
This led to Merlin shifting awkwardly from foot to foot and telling the dragon about Morgana and Morgause's taking of his blood.
"You must get it away from them," said Kilgarrah, "That's all there is to it."
"But what if we can't?" Merlin said.
"Then I have no doubt that they will find a way to manipulate your magic as well," said the dragon, "And Camelot will fall by the end of the week. You do not have a choice. Stop the witches and fix your mistakes, or pay your dues."
"How do we get the blood back?"
"I can't do everything for you, Merlin," Kilgarrah said, "You are the one who knocked your destiny awry. You have to be the ones to fix it."
"Isn't there some sort of protection that you can give him?" Arthur asked, "Some sort of, I don't know, spell or something?"
"They have his blood," said the dragon, "They have a part of him. There is nothing that I can do. I'm sorry."
He unfurled his wings, and stared at Merlin, as if daring him to say otherwise and stop him from leaving. Then, when Merlin said nothing, he gave an almighty flap and disappeared into the night. None of the assembled people spoke.
"Correct me if I'm wrong," said Gwaine, breaking the silence, "But I don't think that he meant that apologyy