It was the third day like this. He didn't speak to her, and her attempts went in vain because he openly ignored her. It was another night of endurance, of pain, of isolation and of longing. She was sleepless all night again. Not for one minute she could feel the calm she felt less than a day ago. Her eyes were burning when she would close them in an attempt to sleep. She spent the entire night sitting on her bed thinking what went wrong and when was she wrong.
For the past seven months, she battled with her entire being and learnt to move on. The place that she always and only imagined for Shahroze, she gave it to Zain. It wasn't easy. To let go. To forget the love, she shared with Shahroze for three years, but the prospect of marriage made it easy for her. Without wanting, without realising and without trying, he made his place in her heart, for eternity. And now when she wanted to tell him about it, he didn't even want to see her face. The question kept colliding in her mind of what went wrong.
And for the fourth time, the night passed, and the rise of the sun gave her some hope again. Maybe today he would speak to her. Maybe, today he would tell her that why he was so silent and reserved for the past three days. But, it was only her hope. The reality of the day had other plans. She was just about to open the door of her room to go outside for breakfast when he knocked on her door before her.
"Mein andar ajaoun?"
"Tumhe ijazat ki kab sey zarurat parr gai?"
She had looked with question in her eyes, but he had looked away.
"Rudaba, yeh..."
He has paused as he tried to hand her an envelope. He had felt a lump in his throat that he had stopped. But he had to continue.
"Yeh... divorce papers hain. Meine sign nahi kiye abhi, pehle tum kardo phir mein karke court mein submit karwa dunga."
Divorce. One word. It was so easy for him to say it. She went numb hearing what he had said. Her world was crumbling down bit by bit and she felt utter helplessness. What had she done to deserve this?
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Zain was trying to hand over the envelope and she had faintly held it. He was out of sight soon after, but this had enraged her. As tears fell from her eyes, she rushed out of her room and followed him. He was about to leave for work when she grabbed him by his shoulder and made him face her.
"Yeh kia bakwas hai?"
She had said raising the envelope.
"Rudaba please..."
"Kia? Kia! Tum log khud ko samjhtay kia ho? Mere faisley karne ka haq kisne diya hai tum logon ko? Kisney kaha hai ke mein yeh chahti hun? Himmat kaise hui tumhari yeh mujhe dene ki! Tumne toh waada kia tha mujhse ke tum mujhe akela nahi choro gey aur har cheez mein mera saath do gey. Bas itna hi tha tumhara saath?"
"Yehi chahti hu tum. Bas kehti nahi..."
She had stepped back and looked at him with wounded eyes.
"Yeh chahti hun mein? Kaise keh sakte ho tum yeh. Mein aisa nahi chahti damn it! Tumhe samjh kyun nahi ati."
"Ab hi toh samjh ayi hai Rudaba."
"Shahroze ko lagta tha woh marr jaega toh mein akeli reh jaoungi tu mujhe tumhare sath bandh gaya. Tumhe lagta hai mein tumhare sath khush nahi hun tu tum mujhe azaad karna chahte hu. Koi mujhse bhi puchega ke mein kia chahti hun?"
He had felt his patience going. He was now furious too, just as much as she was.
"Tum aj bhi usi sey muhabbat karti hu. Tumhe meri zaroorat nahi hai. Mein shaed tumhara dost hi hun, aur kuch bhi nahi."
She had trembled as she took another step back. His words were injuring her brutally.
"You think I am betraying you?"
"Mein khud deikha hai tumhe, tum uss din uski taswir pakkar kar ro rahi thi. Yeh deikh ke mein aur kia samjhta... tumhare yeh mushkil hai toh theek hai na, khatam kardete hain is rishte ko."
Rudaba tried remembering what he was talking about and after realising, she held her hand and pulled him towards that room.
"Chalo mere sath!"
"Rudaba... kia kar..."
She walked in the room with him and pushed him towards the wardrobe and handed him the keys for it.
"Kholo isey. Kholo!"
He unlocked it and found that one side of the wardrobe entirely empty but except one thing. There was a photo frame. The same photo frame that he saw her holding.
"Yeh toh..."
"Haan. Yeh wohi hai ju mein pakar kar ro rahi thi. Yeh toh tumne sun liya ke meine kaha ke kaash woh yahan hota but yeh nahi suna ke meine aisa kyun kaha... kaise suna hoga. Tumne wohi suna ju tum sunnana chahte thay."
"Meine aur kuch nahi suna tha mein tab hi aya tha jab..."
"Jaante ho, Shahroze kehta hota tha ke mein usey kuch bataye baghair nahi reh sakti. Har cheez ka usey pata hota tha meri. Toh mein usey yeh kaise na batati key... key mujhe muhabbat hogai hai. Kaise na batati usey ke jis insaan ke hawale woh mujhe karr gaya tha, us sey mujhe kitni muhabat hogai hai. Usey batana toh tha na? Ke jo faisla usney kia mere liye woh theek tha. Kyunke mein khush thi, sach mein khush thi. Aur mein usey keh rai thi ke kaash woh yahan hota mujhe tumhare sath khush deikhne ke liye."
She had stopped and had sobbed constantly. Zain felt as if he had shot himself by hurting and judging Rudaba over a misunderstanding. She had taken steps forward and came near him.
"Shahroze mere dil mein aj bhi hai lekin ek achi yaad ki tarah. Woh meri muhabbat tha! Woh mera past tha! Aur tum mera present ho! Aur tum meri muhabbat ho! Mein tumsey muhabbat karti hun, Zain! Mujhe nahi pata yeh kaise hua aur kab hua but mujhe bas itna pata hai key yeh hogaya hai. Tumhare sath waqt guzarna meri aadat ban chuka hai. Tum meri aadat ban chukey hu. Aur mein isiliye tumhare kamre mein apna sara samaan shift kia tha. Magar tum ney..."
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Zain had been still listening to every word of hers. It was healing his aching heart, but it was also hitting his brain because of what he did to her in the past three days. He misunderstood so much and didn't even try to ask for an explanation but instead, concluded everything on his own. How could he do this to her? His only love and his wife. Looking up at her, he found her vulnerable and shattered. All because of him. But maybe it was time to already pick up her broken pieces to save her from more pain.
"I am so sorry. I am... I am so sorry, Rudaba. I was so wrong. Please mujhe maaf kardo key meine tumhe itna misunderstand kia. I am so sorry."
He had come forward a little more and held her hand. She didn't stop him because she was tired of all this. She wanted peace and she wanted comfort and his hold was giving her just that. It was an indication in itself that his apology was genuine.
"Ainda aisa kabhi bhi nahi sochna. Meine aj tak kisi ko koi dhoka nahi diya hai toh tumhe kaise de sakti hun jis sey itna pyaar karti hun. Please ainda aise mat sochna. Aj toh shaed sambhal jaoun magar mere mein ab himmat nahi hai. Mein thak gai hun apni muhabbat ko aise baar baar khone sey. Asaan nahi hota dubara muhabbat karna magar tumne mere liye asaan kardiya hai. Tu bas ab mujh per yakeen bhi karo."
"Karunga. Hamesha karunga. Bas is baar maaf kardo. I know meri ghalti hai, meine tumhe ghalat samjha. Lekin mein itna bebass hogaya tha, Rudaba. Meine itne maheenon sey apne andar is ehsas ko dabaye rakha, hamesha jhutlata raha key yeh bhi hosakta hai. Mein tumhe kisi kisam ki takleef nahi dena chahta tha isliye hamesha tumhara dost bana, shohar nahi. Lekin akhir mein mujhe apni muhabbat key agey haar mananni pari. Mujhe laga tha ke hum waqai kareeb arae hain aur meine socha tha mein tumhe apni feelings ke barey mein bata dunga magar us din pata nai tumhe Shahroze ki taswir ke sath rota deikh key mujhe kia horaha tha ke mujhe kuch samjh nahi aya. Mujhe is sab ke liye maaf kardo. Please."
Seeing the moist in his eyes, her lips curled into a simple smile.
"Acha ab bas. Tumhe ehsas hogaya tu meine bhi tumhe maaf kia."
She came forward, wiped the tears and then cupped his face.
"I love you."
She was still holding on to his face as he said it and she had chuckled in response.
"I think, same."
It was his turn to chuckle.
He had wound his arms around her waist and she had wrapped hers around his neck. The distance between them was so less and both of didn't complain. It felt good to be together. It felt good to be home. The next moment they knew, Rudaba closed her eyes and coming even close, she kissed his forehead. It was just a peck, just a union of less than a few seconds but it had left a mark on both of their hearts. It had given their love, a meaning. An ever-lasting and real meaning. Rudaba couldn't look in his eyes afterwards and it was making his grin deepen.
"I have to say you look even cuter when you blush, wife."
She had nudged him away and quickly left the room chuckling. This was such a bliss. So much better. The feeling of love for someone who loved you back. The past few days were tough, but they only made their love even stronger and meaningful. Life was working out finally and it was a good feeling.
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Rudaba had finally moved to Zain's room after their confessions that day. They were happy together and the time they spent together was all and all the most special and precious to them. She was reading a book when he came back in the room. Seeing him enter, she passed him a smile and he reciprocated. He had come over to her side of the bed and sat in front of her when Rudaba pretended she was still reading the book.
"Don't pretend that you are reading, I know you aren't."
A smile was playing on her lips as she tried not to make eye contact with him. He took the book from her hand and placed it on the side table.
"Kia kar rae ho?"
"Apni biwi se baat?"
He had said shrugging his shoulders.
"Acha. Phir farmaein?"
"Kuch nahi. Bas tumhe tang karna tha."
He had said and grinned like an amused kid. Rudaba shook her head and tried getting up so she could walk away when he held her by her wrist and pulled her back to sit but this time close to him. A cold shiver ran through her body as he touched her side of the face with his fingers.
"Zain..."
He didn't let her speak because she couldn't when she noticed that he was darting towards her lips. The next moment, he fused his lips with hers. She didn't resist either but gave in. The gentle and passionate union felt beautiful to them. Few minutes later, they pulled apart only to kiss again. Zain laid down with her and pulled the blanket over them. The night had come with its own bliss and union. Their love was perpetual and known. Shahroze was right to see it when no one else could.
Time healed everything. Love healed everything. It always does.
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Not proofread*
I know its low on feels! Sorry...
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Its also the second last chapter, the next will be last. Thankyou for all your support and love to this story. It means everything to me 💗