SPN cast x Reader
Summary: Reader decides to finally set things straight with Eric but at what cost?
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You sat in the bath in your hotel room with your knees to your chest thinking about whether you should go see Eric. You knew it was probably a bad idea but at the same time, you had so many things that you have wanted to say to him for the past years that you had never got around to saying. You knew you would never hurt Osric yet something felt so wrong about it.
Felicia knocked on the door and called your name. "Y/N you have to come out of there sometime." You made up your mind, dried off, and put your pajamas on. You didn't say anything to Felicia.
She followed you around the room. "You're not actually thinking about going to see him are you?" she asked.
You turned to her having the same thought yourself. "Felicia, I love Osric. I would never leave him for Eric." you sighed with your eyes still glistening from the stress of the situation, "But at the same time when I'm with Eric...something weird happens."
"You aren't fully over him." Felicia sighed in acknowledgment and crossing her arms sharing the nervous feeling.
You sat on the bed looking down at your feet. "I can't leave not knowing," you justified softly more to yourself than her, "without resolving this.
Felicia sat down next to you. "Okay fine." she said finally seeing where you were coming from.
"I'm just going to tell him to back off." you said turning to her, "I'm not in love with him Felicia, I just remember being in love."
"I get it." she said relieving you of some guilt, "You need to set it straight. But you are going to have to be strong Y/N. No more turning to jello every time he says your name."
"I know I've been weak," you said finally admitting it to her and yourself, "but this time I'm putting my foot down."
"You know he's trying to get back together with you right?" Felicia asked raising an eyebrow.
"This could be harder than I thought." you said suddenly feeling extremely insecure again.
"Hey," said Felicia, your best friend, putting a hand on your shoulder, "you've got this."
"Do I?" you asked nervously, "It's like we're still connected you know? But I don't want to be. Ugh, it's all so confusing."
"We've all been there." said Felicia with a comforting smile, "Eric's a great guy and a total package but Osric is even better. Just remember that."
She was right and you knew it. If you didn't tell Eric you were done with him you would never stop wondering what might've happened if you did. You looked to her with appreciation. "Thanks, Felicia. You're the best." you said finally showing a smile.
"I know." she said before giving you a much-needed hug.
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After the events of the previous night, you became a ghost at breakfast and lunch. You were extremely nervous to talk to Eric tonight and so you skipped out on activities and you went back up to your room and watched "50 First Dates" (The movie you always watched when you were sick). You were stressed out and you didn't want anyone to see you this way. You didn't want a repeat of what happened last time you were really stressed although that did result in Paris. No matter what, you just couldn't face Osric knowing what you were about to do. Having a tendency to be late you looked at the clock and realized you had overslept your nap. You needed to get ready quickly. You were still in the hotel robe and so you jumped up and started searching for socks when you heard a knock on the door. You opened the door to see Osric and you knew this situation wouldn't end well. You were already in such a hurry.
"Hey Y/N," Osric smiled and noticing your nervous jumping asked, "Where you headed?"
"Uh... nowhere." you smiled nervously before looking back at your clock, "What's up?"
Osric kind of looked at you awkwardly before saying, "Can I come in?"
"Umm..." you giggled nervously, "It's kind of a mess in here."
"Oh," said Osric, "Well since the trip is almost over I was wondering if you'd want to go out with me tonight?"
"Out?" you asked eyes widening and not knowing what to say. "Like on a date?"
"Well that's what couples do right?" he laughed. His laugh was amazing. How could you lie right to it?
"Yeah of course." you laughed it off, "I knew that." You glanced back at your clock and you could feel your body becoming anxious and wanting Osric to go so you could get ready.
"Great." he smiled innocently, "How about you meet me at around 6:45?"
"Tonight?" you asked eyes widening as the situation became worse. How would you meet Eric at 6 and Osric at 6:45? You hadn't even factored in traffic!
"I thought you said you weren't going anywhere tonight," Osric said with a confused looked on his face.
"I'm not." you said quickly, perhaps too quickly. Your eyes slid to an excuse, " I was just making sure that it was tonight. You know me, always second guessing myself."
"Actually you're usually pretty confident with yourself." Osric said. You feared he was sensing something was up and it killed you to lie to him.
"Where are we meeting?" you asked quickly.
"I was thinking the Eiffel tower. It sounds romantic enough." he said with a smile that made your guilty heart melt.
"Eiffel tower at 6:45 got it." you said before waving and starting to close the door.
"Wait where are you going so fast?" Osric asked stopping the door from closing.
"Ladies room." you lied with a nervous smile, "Gotta blast!" You then closed the door right on his face and proceeded to let out the nervous breath you didn't realize you were holding. You put your back against the door and slid down to the ground putting your head in your hands. This was a horrible idea but I the same time you told yourself that everything would be fine. You would quickly talk to and dismiss Eric and then meet Osric for your date on the Eiffel Tower. You would have to get ready for your date now since you wouldn't be coming back. So you curled your hair and put on a dark purple dress under a dark blue raincoat. Then, you took a deep breath and headed out to meet Eric.
You then made your way to the bridge where you were supposed to meet Eric. The sky was a stunning color of grey that made you question that the shade of blue behind the clouds really existed. There was a cool breeze as you approached the bridge with various locks chained all around the side with various tourist couples looking and taking pictures. You noticed Eric looking out over the water and you couldn't tell if it was the breeze or the nerves that made the hair on the back of your neck stand straight up. Eric turned around noticing you and you came to meet him.
"You look stunning." he said and you realized that dressing up for your date with Osric was not making this any easier.
"Thanks." you said looking down telling yourself you were here on a mission.
"You know," said Eric running his fingers over a black lock closest to you that had the initial A and J on them. "All these locks were put here by different couples. They lock their love on the bridge and throw away the key."
"Yeah I remember." you said, "We always said we'd go here on our honeymoon."
"Yeah those were the days." said Eric smoothly not meeting your eyes, " You know I still remember the day I met you."
Be strong. "Eric-" you started but he cut you off.
"You were fresh out of college," he smiled and you were taken back to the memories, "working as a waitress trying to start a career in acting. You were performing at the local theater production of Beauty and the Beast I think it was. They were right to cast you as Beauty."
You couldn't take it but you didn't know what to say, "I remember." you said.
"I had such a big crush on you after that performance." he smiled still looking at the lock, "I thought you were a huge star. I searched my pockets after the show for any extra cash to buy you a bouquet of flowers but I only had enough for a single red rose. Then I was too nervous to even give it to you. I left it at your dressing room door with a note on it."
You remembered this scene and it made you feel warm inside despite the cool breeze which scared you. "Eric, why are you telling me this?" you asked starting to get frustrated with your own emotions.
"Because." he said looking you in the eyes. "We've spent a lot of time apart and I know I've regretted our break up and I think that it was a stupid idea in the first place. I get it you have a boyfriend, but can't you just give me a chance please?" As he said this last sentence he pulled a single red rose out of his pocket and offered it to you.
You looked down at it and it took everything in you not to take it. You kept your mind on Osric.
"You had your chance." you said to Eric not letting your face show any sign of weakness.
"You can't say" Eric started softly walking closer to you, "that our time together wasn't some of the best moments of your life." You felt yourself losing as he brushed a strand of your hair behind your ear and placed the rose in your hair.
You snapped out of it and took a few steps away from him, "Actually I can, Eric." you said even though it was hard, "I loved you once. But I've moved on. When we were together I was scared and lonely that I'd never live my dream. That's a selfish reason to love. Now I've found friends that I can call my family. The best moments of my life are right now."
"Yeah," said Eric taking another step closer to you, "But now you are on a huge TV show so we can be together." Suddenly the scene stopped. What he had just said, for the first time this whole trip, was not the right thing. Suddenly, pieces started to fall into place in your memory.
"Us not working out had nothing to do with our careers taking us different places did it?" you asked almost not believing your sudden jump to conclusions.
He saw you getting worked up and tried to calm you down by reassuring you, "Us breaking up was a mutual decision." he said
"Do you remember what you said that night?" you asked wanting the truth.
* "Y/N I'm sorry baby. I really am." said Eric as you sat next to each other on the curb in front of his apartment on a cool night.
"I'm sorry too." you said, tears threatening to escape.
"I hope you can understand." said Eric not meeting your eyes, "I've wanted to be a model my whole life and unfortunately that means I have to make sacrifices."
"Yeah I know." you said feeling like it was all your fault, "Our paths are just taking us different ways."
"You just aren't good for my image." he said sadly, "I can't be dating someone who's only been in one refrigerator commercial. I need to think of my career"
You nodded sadly in agreement and watched it all end.*
Now you saw what you didn't before. Angrily you said, "This whole time I've been blaming myself for not being who you needed me to be. I actually believed your lies."
"Where is this coming from?" Eric asked playing dumb.
"I was so naive." you cried at yourself still confused, "But now. Now that you're trying to get back together with me I finally see you for who you are."
"You have no idea what you're talking about." said Eric pleading with you before grabbing your hand and stroking it, "Y/N I love you."
You ripped your hand away. "You dumped me because I was bringing you down because I wasn't famous enough to be with you. And now that I am, now that I'm more famous than you, you want to get back together with me." you said as couples on the bridge started to leave due to the awkward situation. You felt your mind cluster.
"Y/N none of that is true." Eric pleaded, his eyes glistening.
"Yes, it is" you said in realization, "and I must be freakin dumb not to see it."
"Listen to me." Eric said calming you, "You're right. I let my fame go to my head and I cut off who was most important to me but I have never stopped loving you. I've made mistakes. But believe me, I am not a gold digger just trying to get back with you because you are on some show."
You backed away. "You played me like a fiddle." you said.
"I made you believe that our breakup was benefiting both of us, yes, but I didn't want to hurt you." he said admitting it. You couldn't believe you were almost falling for this guy again. He was lying to you about your break up, about everything. He wasn't half the man Osric was.
"If you were thinking of my feelings," you said more quietly now, "you wouldn't have invited me here tonight and asked me to break up with the man that I love to run away with you."
"I wouldn't have if I thought you actually cared about him more than me." he said still playing his game, "We have history. We have a scrapbook of history."
"That scrapbook is about to become the burn book." you said turning to leave.
"Y/N-" Eric started after you.
"No." you said turning around, " I came to say sayonara and you just made it a hell of a lot easier."
"Dammit Y/N" you heard Eric say angrily as you walked away, never looking back. You walked towards the end of the bridge. You were broken but you had what you came for. An end with Eric. Now you had a handsome young man waiting for you who you knew would never hurt you.
You looked down at your watch, "Crap." you said, "I'm so late!" You called a cab and rushed to meet Osric on the Eiffel tower as you heard thunder start to clap around you.