"Are you sure your head's okay?" Josh asked me as we got into his car after the bus dropped us off at school.
"Yeah, it's fine," I assured him with a sigh.
Losing was never fun and I really didn't want to talk to Josh since I was in a mood after how badly I played tonight. Not to mention, I was frustrated by the fact that I couldn't stop thinking about Fox Ridley.
Fox was consuming my every thought. I was practically drowning in handsome images of him in my head. My own brain hated me and wanted me to suffer.
"By the way don't make any plans next Friday and Saturday," Josh told me as he drove out of the school parking lot and toward our home.
"You mean don't make plans on my birthday?" I asked in an annoyed tone.
"Right," Josh confirmed.
"Not like I have anyone to make plans with," I muttered, resting my head against the window.
"You have plans with me, I just told you that," Josh responded in a light tone.
I didn't reply as Josh continued driving us home. By the time we got there, I saw that the lights were still on, meaning Dad had waited for us to get home like he always did. I sighed as I grabbed my stuff out of the car and made my way toward the house.
"How was the game?" Dad asked as soon as I stepped foot in the house, Josh right behind me. Dad sat in the living room on the couch with his glasses perched on his nose and a book in his hands.
"We lost," Josh told him with a shrug.
I waited for Josh to rat me out about hitting my head, but he never did. Usually Josh couldn't wait for the chance to tell Dad something about me, but surprisingly, he kept his mouth shut.
"You can't win them all," Dad reassured us with a smile.
After nodding in agreement, tried making my way to the stairs before my father called out my name. I sighed and shut my eyes for a moment in frustration before turning around to face him.
"Can I talk to you for a minute alone?" Dad asked with a hopeful look, motioning for me to sit beside him on the couch. Josh took that as his cue to leave and quickly jogged up the stairs.
"Yeah?" I muttered as I took a seat beside my father on the couch.
"I wanted to talk to you about what happened on Thanksgiving," he told me. I had already figured that was where this conversation was going.
"Dad, it's fine," I sighed, running a frustrated hand through my hair. "I'm over it."
Dad shook his head and gave me a serious look. "It's not fine. I'm sorry we talked about you behind your back. We shouldn't have done that."
I hummed in agreement, hoping to be done with this conversation.
"But I am concerned about you," Dad continued, eliciting a groan from me.
This was what I didn't want to talk about. His concern only made me feel fragile, like I was nothing but an emotional wreck and it was obvious to everyone who knew me.
"I promise you, I'm fine," I urged him, leaning back on the couch.
"You don't seem happy," he pointed out, his voice wavering a bit.
An uncomfortable feeling crept up in my stomach and I averted my gaze from my father, keeping my eyes situated on my hands that were in my lap.
"I think you could benefit from talking to somebody," Dad continued when I didn't say anything.
"I really don't want to," I mumbled, keeping my eyes down.
Dad placed a comforting hand on my shoulder. "And I don't want to force you into anything that you don't want to do, but I'm worried about you."
I swallowed a lump in my throat and tilted my head back to look up at the ceiling.
"How about we make a deal?" Dad suggested, causing me to look toward him. "You talk to me about what's bothering you and we can make a decision together about what your best option is."
"Okay," I quietly uttered, knowing he wouldn't budge on this.
"Great," Dad replied with a smile, clapping his hand down on my shoulder. "Go get some rest."
As soon as he dismissed me, I scurried up the stairs and into my room and fell asleep that night wishing I could go back to a time when I didn't feel like such a burden.
***
The week went by and soon enough it was Friday night, the day before my birthday, and Josh insisted on the two of us going out after hockey practice, just the two of us. I spent the whole day dreading it, but didn't have the heart to decline his offer since he was making an effort to be closer to me.
I nearly groaned aloud when Josh pulled into the movie theater parking lot. The last thing I wanted to do was sit in the theater for two hours to watch a movie I didn't even want to see. At least I wouldn't have to speak to Josh much.
The two of us walked into the theater and up to the ticket booth.
"I got it, it's your birthday," Josh said when I started to take my wallet out. I wasn't about to argue with him about it, so I left my wallet in my pocket and allowed him to buy the tickets.
We ended up seeing some movie that I had never even heard of and it wasn't a complete snooze fest, so I wasn't too annoyed by my outing with Josh. He kept checking his phone during the entire thing, seemingly uninterested, but I didn't care.
"So, uh, how did you like the movie?" Josh awkwardly asked once we were in the car.
"It was alright," I replied.
"Yeah..." he trailed, pausing for a moment before he started the car. "So I've been meaning to talk to you about something."
I tried not to groan at his words. It seemed like all I ever did with him or my Dad was talk about serious things that I didn't care to speak about.
"Yeah?"
"Don't take this the wrong way," he quickly let out, looking at me briefly before looking back at the road. That probably meant I was going to take it the wrong way.
"What is it?" I asked in an irritated tone after he took a long pause.
"Okay, I'm just going to ask," he let out a deep breath, "do you have a thing for Fox?"
My eyes widened and I smacked my hand down on that center console as I whipped my head to face him.
"What?" I nearly screeched. "Why the hell would you ask me that?"
Was the way I was affected by Fox really that noticeable that I had Josh asking me about it?
Josh tightly pressed his lips together, looking uncomfortable.
He let out another breath before continuing, "Look, it's totally fine if you have a thing for him, but—"
"I do not," I assured him, even though I wasn't too sure myself.
"But, Fox isn't— he's not—" Josh let out an exaggerated sigh after stammering his words.
"Spit it out, Josh," I snapped, heat rising on my cheeks.
"Um... he's not... he's not into dudes," Josh stuttered. "I just don't want you to get hurt or upset."
I almost laughed out loud at Josh's concerns. If only he knew just how 'not into dudes' Fox actually was.
I kept my laughs to myself and stared straight ahead at the road, my lips in a thin line.
"Okay," I finally said, not able to think of anything else to say.
"So you like him?" Josh asked lightly.
I sighed. "I guess."
I knew I felt something for him. I just didn't know exactly what it was.
Josh just nodded and the two of us didn't say much to each other for the rest of the ride home. When we got back to the house, I noticed there were more cars than usual parked on the road.
I raised my eyebrows in confusion and followed Josh out of the car and up toward the house.
"Who's here?" I asked him as we walked up the porch steps.
Josh just shrugged as he opened the door. He motioned for me to follow him toward the kitchen to which I reluctantly obliged.
The kitchen was dark when we walked in, but suddenly the lights flicked on and a chorus of people shouted "Surprise!" which caused me to jump back a bit.
After my eyes adjusted to the light, I looked around the room, my eyes immediately finding Fox who had a wide smile on his face. My breath hitched as I took in the way he looked. Josh nudged me with his elbow as if he caught me staring. I looked around the room again to see who else was here.
Along with Fox, our group from the team and the GSA kids, including Claudia, stood around the kitchen table where there was a birthday cake in the center.
"What's this?" I asked after the initial shock wore off.
Fox's smile fell into a sneer. "What the hell's it look like? It's a birthday cake."
I rolled my eyes, walking over to him. "I meant this." I motioned to everyone in the kitchen.
"I may or may not have planned a gathering to celebrate your birthday," Fox replied with a smirk.
My smile broadened so wide I felt as though my cheek bones would be sore later. This was probably the first real smile on my face since I had come out. It was the first time I had felt genuinely happy. I felt like I could cry at my happiness.
"You didn't have to do this," I told him, looking around at the group in the kitchen, sharing a smile with Trevor.
"What? Did you think we weren't going to celebrate your birthday?"
Fox was looking at me like I was crazy, his lips pursed and his eyebrows raised in confusion. I wanted to kiss the look right off his face.
Instead, I took a step forward and hugged him, causing him to stumble back a bit. Fox looped his arm around my waist and patted my back with a chuckle.
"Thank you," I said, nearly breathlessly, in his ear.
We pulled apart and stared at each other with matching smiles. Josh cleared his throat and walked in between us.
"Let's do the cake," Josh suggested, glancing at me with a look of urgency.
I took my eyes off of Fox long enough to greet everyone and Josh started lighting the candles.
"You guys don't have to sing to me," I told them, looking around the room at everyone.
"It's your birthday, of course we do!" Trevor exclaimed, eliciting sounds of agreement from the rest of the crowd.
"I–"
"We're singing to you. Get over it," Nadia interrupted me.
I sent a pleading look over to Fox who just ended up snickering at my expense.
"Get ready, Ellis, because we're singing to you," Alex spoke up, Ryan and Jude nodding in agreement as they chuckled.
I groaned as the group started singing and kept my eyes trained down on the cake. Fox came over and hooked his arm around my shoulders, causing me to look up. He gave me a boastful look as they all finished singing and then he released me.
"Make a wish," he said. "And make it a good one."
I smiled lightly at him before turning to the cake. I thought for a few moments and then blew out the candles which was quickly followed by cheers from the group. All cheered except for Ian who just stood there with his arms crossed. For once, I was slightly grateful for his hostility.
"Now let's eat this thing, I'm starving," Ryan joked, approaching the table.
"You can cut it," I told him, gesturing toward the cake.
"That's supposed to be the job for the birthday boy," he told me pointedly.
I gave him and unimpressed look to which he just chuckled and picked up the knife to start cutting the cake.
Trevor came over to me as Ryan started handing out pieces of cake.
"Did you wish for anything good?" Trevor asked me with a friendly smile, almost bumping his hip into mine.
I nodded. "I think so."
My wish was vague, but I truly hoped that it would be granted to me. All I wanted was happiness, the same happiness I felt at this moment, and that was my birthday wish.
"It was really nice of Fox to plan this for you," Trevor commented. "I didn't know you two were so close."
Before I could reply to his statement, Fox leaned over to be part of our conversation.
"Oh yeah, Elijah and I are best buds," Fox interjected, looking Trevor up and down.
Trevor just smiled kindly at him, seeming as if he didn't notice that Fox appeared to be sizing him up or asserting his dominance in some way. I smacked Fox's shoulder with the back of my hand and gave him a pointed look as if telling him to back off.
"Here," Ryan said as he shoved a plate with cake on it in my hands. "The best piece for you."
"What makes it the best piece?" I asked with a strange look on my face.
Ryan shrugged with a goofy smile. "Because I cut it just for you?"
I chuckled and playfully shook my head. "Thanks."
We all stood around and chatted while we ate our cake. Fox took the opportunity to leave me with Trevor and walk over to Claudia, causing my mind to turn green in jealousy. I hated watching the two of them interact. The way they laughed together and how he stood so close made them appear to be the perfect couple. I couldn't keep my jaw from clenching as I watched Fox smile down at her. The sound of my teeth grinding got the attention of Trevor.
"You alright?" he asked me, a concerned look on his face.
I cleared my throat, tearing my gaze away from the subject of my torment.
"Fine," I assured him as I mustered up a fake smile.
Trevor looked around the room, as if making sure no one was watching, before leaning closer to me and bringing his mouth to my ear.
"Do you mind if I give you your present in private?" he whispered.
My mind immediately filled with dread at the thought of what Trevor had planned for me, but it wasn't like I could tell him no.
"Sure," I whispered back with that same fake smile.
The two of us were able to quickly slip out of the room and into the hallway without being noticed by anyone. Trevor grabbed his gift for me before we left the room and stood in front of me with it in his hands.
"I just wanted to be able to explain why I got this for you without everyone around," Trevor told me and then chuckled when he saw the look on my face, "Don't worry, it's nothing bad."
"Okay..." I trailed, holding out my hand for the rectangular gift.
Trevor handed it over to me and urged me to open it. When I pulled the paper off, I was met with a painting that held every color of the rainbow. It was strange, yet beautiful and intriguing.
"What's this?" I asked as I smiled down at the painting.
"Well, when I was in your room, I noticed you didn't really have anything in there," Trevor started, "So I decided to get you something to decorate with."
"I love it," I truthfully told him. I never would have thought to hang art in my room, but the painting was too amazing to keep hidden.
Trevor smiled widely. "It's by one of my favorite contemporary painters. It reminded me of you as soon as I saw it. That's why I wanted to get it for you."
I quirked my head to the side. "Reminded you of me?"
"It's beautiful, yet kind of chaotic and complex," Trevor explained in an even tone, a calm look on his face.
I stared blankly at him for a few moments, unsure of how to respond.
"Thank you, Trev," I finally let out.
I leaned forward to place a chaste kiss on his cheek, despite my better judgement. And just as I did, Fox came sauntering into the hallway and cleared his throat. I pulled away from Trevor to face Fox and was met with his not too happy, disapproving stare.
"We wanted to do your presents, unless you're too busy out here," Fox said in an almost accusing tone, crossing his arms over his chest.
I sent Fox an annoyed glare. Even though he probably didn't intend to, he made me jealous with his interactions with Claudia tonight. And I wasn't about to let him shame me for my own with Trevor. Just a few weeks ago he was encouraging me to hook up with him, and now it seemed as if he wanted me to have nothing to do with him.
"No, we're all done," Trevor kindly told him as I kept my scowl on Fox.
Trevor walked back into the kitchen, leaving Fox and I standing alone in the hallway. Fox didn't say anything which only caused me to get more annoyed.
"What?" I snapped.
"I thought you weren't into Trevor," Fox said, his eyes narrowed in accusation.
I scoffed. "I'm not. I don't know why you care anyway."
"I don't," he obviously lied, trying to act nonchalant.
He smiled at me, wiping the accusatory look off of his face.
"Let's go do your presents," Fox suggested, turning around to head back to the kitchen.
I couldn't hold back my irritated groan as I followed him. All he seemed to do was confuse me. Even when he was being aggravating, I couldn't atop myself from being attracted to him.
As soon as I got back into the kitchen, Ryan motioned me over to him and handed me a card.
"Here you go, birthday boy," he said.
I thanked him as I opened the card to reveal a gift card. Most of the gifts from the group were either money or gift cards. Ian didn't even get me anything, but I wasn't bothered by it. I didn't really expect him to.
The last gift I opened was Fox's. Fox handed me the card with an excited, expectant look.
When I opened the card, a ticket fell out. Fox was quick to bend down and pick it up before handing it to me. Once I realized what it was, feelings of excitement and shock consumed me.
"Surprise?" Fox said, sounding slightly unsure.
All of my annoyance at him earlier washed away as I smiled widely at him, wanting to just throw my arms around him in a hug. I looked from him, to the Bruins ticket in my hand, and back up to him.
"You didn't have to do this," I told him.
Fox rolled his eyes. "It's not a big deal. Hope you're not busy tomorrow because we're going."
I chuckled and looked around at the rest of the group, most of which were smiling warmly.
"Thank you, Fox," I quietly said.
Fox smiled and tossed his arm around my shoulder. I couldn't help but notice the state we were getting from Josh.
I didn't care what Josh had to say about it. He didn't know Fox like I did, and I wasn't going to let him make me feel bad about the way I felt.
**
So as I was working on today's chapter I realized Elijah's birthday is in this chapter and today is my birthday so I felt like I should post it today. Here's my birthday present to you!
What did you think about Elijah's talk with his dad? And what he admitted to Josh? What about the surprise party Fox and Josh planned? And Fox's reaction to seeing Elijah with Trevor? Also, Elijah's gifts!
Let me know!