Song: Wires by The Neighborhood
"Holy fuckin' shit..." Kenny said to nobody in particular. He smiled and laughed stupidly. Smoke blew out of his mouth, leaving the air to smell like this particular herb.
By this time, it was very evident that he didn't care about the fact he was smoking pot in the school bathroom.
Kenny stopped caring a while ago.
The time where he just stopped caring about everything was when his last friend died brutally in a car crash. Then again, who wouldn't be pushed to suicide?
"Fuck... I feel so fuckin great." Kenny said to himself yet again.
Truth was, he wanted to badly to kill himself. He prayed to god every day to die permanently, but no luck. He tried already every day this week so far.
Kenny then stood up and started pacing around the bathroom. He was alone, and luckily could do this for as long as he wanted. Nobody would come looking for him. Nobody cared.
He laughed, "All my friends are fuckin' dead..." He muttered to himself. "All died... I was with most of 'em recently before they died... Fuck... It's all my fault... My fault..."
He continued muttering this to himself for the next ten minutes, still pacing around the small, rundown room. Finally, he had to stop when the bell rang.
Flinching a bit at the sudden noise, Kenny inhaled deeply. "Oh shit alright fam." He said.
He got rid of the visual evidence that he was high, and shrugged his bag over his shoulder. He slowly started to head to class. It was pretty pointless to do so, however. Kenny was failing all of his classes already, and he never even bothered to pay attention.
What was the point when all his friends were dead?
In the middle of 7th period, Kenny was called down to the guidance office. "Oh joy," He thought, "They gonna see that I'm high all the time, or get me a grieving counselor?"
Kenny walked as slowly as possible down to guidance. He sighed to himself, dreading this. The only benefit he saw of this was that he got to get out of class.
He then made it to his destination, sadly enough. He walked up to the front desk and signed in.
"You're Kenneth McCormick, correct?" The secretary asked.
"Yep."
"Alright, your counselor's office is straight ahead and to the left."
This random lady appeared to have a look of sympathy, or some other emotion that Kenny didn't really care to pay attention to.
"Okay."
With a dragging feeling of dread, he walked into the room he was directed to. In the office, he saw two people: his guidance counselor, Mrs. Taylor, and a woman who looked semi-familiar.
"Hello, Kenneth, I'm glad to see you could make it." Mrs. Taylor said with a fake smile plastered on her face. "Here, take a seat."
Kenny took a seat across from the two women without a word.
"Now, the past while has had to have been very... Difficult for you to cope through."
"Difficult?" Kenny couldn't help but chuckle. "Pretty much everyone I knew in elementary school is dead."
"Yes... All very unfortunate circumstances..." Mrs. Taylor said slowly. "Seeing as I talked to your parents, and they can't afford to pay for a therapist, I decided that I will have you meet with someone with no charge."
Mrs. Taylor gestured to the woman next to her. "This is Poppy Miller. I'll have you meet with her every study hall and every other lunch from now on, and you can come down to talk whenever you need to."
"Oh... Okay." Kenny said, giving a very underwhelming reaction.
"Okay..." Mrs. Taylor sighed a bit. "I'll leave you two alone to talk for a bit, but I'll be back soon, okay?"
"Sure."
The brunette lady left the room, leaving Kenny alone with Poppy. She looked ahead at him.
"Hello Kenneth," She said, "How are you feeling?"
"Awful, how do you think?"
Ahead of time, Poppy was told about his sarcastic and rude remarks, but even so she was a tad taken aback.
"Yes, I suspected so..." She said slowly. "The death of your classmates must've taken an incredible toll on you..."
"Yep."
"Well, would you like to talk through anything? Or tell me how it negatively affected you?"
"Well, I'm completely fucking alone now," Kenny started, rolling his eyes. "And now I can never see them again because they fucking died."
"Okay... Okay, have you thought of joining a new friend group?" Poppy suggested.
"What, to replace them or some shit?"
"No, no, of course not, there's no way to replace people you were so close to...! Just, to have more people that can relate to your struggles, and to help you through things..."
Kenny started getting pissed.
He didn't need some lady coming in here and giving him useless advice. Actually, he could tell she didn't even really know how to help. Whether she was unqualified, or Kenny was just different from other grieving kids, he didn't know. But nonetheless, this was all pointless.
"Cool, can I go now?"
"No, Kenneth, I'll have you here for the rest of the period."
This made him sigh heavily.
Poppy was clearly started to feel defeated.
"Alright, you want me to talk through it?" Kenny finally asked, exasperated.
"Yes... Yes, I would, if you think it'll help you."
"Alright," Kenny sighed. "Sit tight."
He then proceeded to go on a rant.
"So, the first kid to die was Token, back in September. He was one of two black kids in the school, dealed with racism constantly... I don't know it for sure, but I think that cops had a close eye on him his whole life. Because when he accidentally stole a small item and acted in self defense after being hurt, one of the officers shot him.
"Then that same month, Butters... Butters Stotch. I found out he was being beaten by his parents, and they weren't fast enough to get him away from those assholes."
Kenny kept the section about Butters very short. He just couldn't handle talking about Butters's death.
"Then there was Tweek, the next month. A kid fuckin' beat him to death because he was gay. Although I guess he didn't really mean to kill him. Not gonna lie, that made me pretty fucking paranoid. I like guys and girls, so if they found out, I'd be crucified." He laughed a bit.
"Anyway, the next kid was his boyfriend, Craig, which happened the same day. Swallowed some pills to kill himself. Before this, he was told by his friend that Tweek was killed. I even witnessed this, he went fucking mad. He was punching walls and hitting anyone who even talked to him, he was crying... It was... Sad.
"After this was Eric Cartman, in November. He was one of the last people I suspected to have fucking bulimia." Kenny then blurted out.
This was the first time he admitted that he knew Cartman had an eating disorder.
He paused for a minute.
"Uh, anyway, yeah. I found out the day prior. Was going to get him help later that day, but... It was too late, I guess. He had a heart attack in P.E. They found out later in the autopsy or whatever that he was bulimic for a long time. Guess that weakened his heart a lot, and he couldn't handle much physical exertion.
"Then in December, one of my closer friends, Kyle died. He was Jewish, bullied heavily, and depressed as all hell. He also smoked cigs a lot to cope, and didn't know what to do with his life. Wanted to run away, change his name, or just disappear... But he got his wish..."
Kenny looked down.
"He killed himself too. Hung himself on his ceiling fan... God, his little brother saw his body..."
He sniffled a bit, but didn't stop talking.
"Then in May, I watched Clyde die. The kid was crying constantly, but we never really knew why. He also lost his mom when he was nine.
"Anyway, his dad took us and some other kids out on vacation. He snuck some drinks all that day, and when we went out on a hike, he was completely out of it. He wandered off while we were all distracted. Once we got back to the hotel, he was complaining about his stomach. I got him Advil, but it didn't help.
"Soon enough, he was talking about seeing all the others... Token, Butters, Tweek, Craig, Cartman and Kyle... That's when I got the adults, but it was too late. Saw his dead body laying on the bed...
"Autopsy showed he had poisonous berries."
Kenny sighed as he started to feel some tears well up in his eyes. He hated it. He didn't want to show that he was in pain. He didn't want to cry in front of anyone.
"The last one to go was Stan, a few weeks ago. The dude was a depressed alcoholic. I tried to help, but... I won't bullshit you, I didn't know how. So he kept on drinking, and I didn't stop him, because we were both depressed and making... Unhealthy choices." He said vaguely.
"Anyway, he was drunk in school one normal day. Turned out it was the anniversary of him and his girlfriend, and he forgot to get her something. So he drove to get her something, still drunk, and... He got in a car crash. And I... I fucking allowed it... I didn't help any of them..."
At this moment, Kenny couldn't take it anymore. He started sobbing uncontrollably, burying his face in his hands.
"Holy fucking shit I let all of them die!"
Poppy was undoubtedly surprised by all the information Kenny gave her, and almost didn't know how to take it all in. She was even more shocked to see Kenny sobbing like this.
At this moment, Mrs. Taylor walked back into the room with a small stack of papers.
"...Kenneth...?"
~~~~
"Fuck..." Kenny winced a bit at the stinging on and around his eyes.
The hot June air did not mix well with puffy, red eyes.
The sun rays made it feel much, much worse.
But, luckily enough, he had just made it home. He tried to wash his face in the school bathroom to make it look like he wasn't sobbing his eyes out. In reality, it didn't look too convincing, but he could at least blame it on a cold or something.
He didn't want Karen of all people to see how much pain he was in.
Kenny made it into the old, worn down house. He saw both of his parents knocked out on the couch, drunk.
Karen was sitting in the kitchen, reading a book and drinking some water. She looked over and noticed Kenny coming in.
"Hey big bro." She greeted.
"Hey lil sis." He tried to sound as happy as he could, but his voice cracked a bit when he spoke. Luckily, Karen only laughed it off a bit, so he did as well.
Without another word, Kenny headed up to his room. He and Karen shared a room at this point, and Kevin was already moved out.
He shut the door behind him and plopped down on his mattress. Immediately, he started crying again. To hide the noise, he hid his face in his orange parka.
He felt awful.
What if Poppy told someone else about his rant today? Would they bring him to a mental institution? Did they even care? Would they try to give him more therapy? The truth was that he had no idea, and that honestly scared him.
Shaking a bit, Kenny reached under his pillow and got out his razor blade. The top part of it was a shiny silver, but the bottom was covered in dried blood.
Kenny wiped away his remaining tears and pulled off his parka. He was wearing a grey t-shirt with a faded logo on the front. His wrists were covered in scars.
Some of them went straight down his wrists, almost as if it were an intent to kill himself. They didn't look all that old.
Others went across his wrists, some even overlapping. A good amount of them were fairly faded, but the rest were reddish and more fresh.
Kenny glided the razor across his skin and drew blood easily. This one overlapped as well, this time with the vertical cut, making almost a cross symbol.
He found that pretty ironic.
"Fuck I fucking hate myself I hate myself I hate myself I hate myself I hate myself..."
Kenny mumbled this to himself for a while as he left more cuts on his pale, scarred skin.
But he had to stop before Karen came in and saw this.
So he just cleaned up the blood and kept on his parka.
The next day at school, Kenny was called down to the guidance office during lunch. He walked down slowly and dreadfully, not wanting to talk about anything or do anything anymore.
Once he did finally make it, he was greeted with Poppy waiting for him
by the front desk.
"Hi Kenneth," She said, "Come in. We have the office for ourselves today, since your guidance counselor is at a meeting currently."
"Okay." Kenny shrugged a bit and went along with it, not caring at this point if they were alone or not.
The two walked into the small room and sat down in their respectful places.
"So, tell me," Poppy started, "Has anything happened worth noting since we last met?"
Kenny wasn't really in the mood to tell this lady that he was cutting open his wrists last night.
"No."
Nodding a bit, she added, "Then would you like to continue talking as we were yesterday?"
Kenny started to feel anger and desperation build up.
"I don't know."
"Okay... Have you tried what I suggested? Like, going to talk with your peers to make more friends?"
"Not really."
"And how come?"
He started to snap.
"Because I don't fucking want to." Kenny said aggressively.
"I... Um..." Poppy was at a loss for words.
"You know what, fuck it, what's the worst that could happen if I tell you this?" Kenny said, sighing heavily.
"Aight, fuckin prepare yourself. I can't die. Trust me, I've died a million times before, but no matter what has happened, I always just woke up in my bed like nothing happened. And I hate it, because since I'm fucking immortal, all I can do is watch everyone I care about dies.
"Meanwhile, the amount of times I've tried to kill myself is uncountable. But I just can't stay dead, no matter how hard I try." Kenny sighed and looked down.
"What I'm really saying is... What's the point of living when I just keep dying? But what's the point of dying when I just keep coming back?"
As Kenny looked up, he saw Poppy with her jaw practically on the floor, and speechless. This didn't surprise him, though. He didn't expect her to believe him.
"Yeah, this was pointless." Kenny said with a sigh and stood up.
"Kenneth, don't get up, we need to talk-"
Kenny rushed out and ran into the rundown bathroom. He felt so done with all of this bullshit.
He couldn't take it anymore.
He dug through his bag before finally finding the same razor he had used on himself last night.
With close to no hesitation, Kenny took the razor and slid it deep across his throat. Blood started to gush out of his neck messily, and caused an immense amount of pain.
But he just had to try at least at one more time. He just wanted to see them all again.
He just wanted so badly to truly die. Was that so much to ask for?
Kenny went as deep as he possibly could before dropping the razor and clutching his neck. This made the bleeding even worse.
Crimson red blood was coughed out from his mouth and ran down his hands, on all of his clothes and onto the floor beneath him.
He never did get used to the pain of dying this way.
Kenny's vision started to grey, rather than black, like it usually did. And despite the pain and agony he was in, his eyes lit up for a moment at his new sight.
In front of him stood none other than Token, Butters, Tweek, Craig, Cartman, Kyle, Clyde, and Stan.
His moment of happiness quickly disappeared.
"What the fuck are you doing?" Stan asked him angrily.
With the gash in his throat, Kenny couldn't speak. All he could do was make inaudible squeaks and grunts.
"You're not welcome here. Stop trying so hard." Kyle glared down at his once friend.
All of their demeanors scared and disappointed Kenny.
"Stay away from us, stupid fucking immortal." Cartman joined in.
Even his whole friend group was turning against him.
Kenny looked over at Butters hopefully. He was the one person who was always nice to him, and supported him.
But Butters seemed to feel the same way as all the others. He then said, "Wake up. You're never going to die. Not really."
Kenny's vision started to go completely black as everyone he thought he knew walked right away from him.
Kenny shot up from his bed in a cold sweat.
His neck felt... Odd, and wet. As he touched it, he felt that the gash from his "dream" was still there.
Looking forward, everyone was ahead of him.
Token had some parts of his skin bleached white, and had a bullet lodged in his chest.
Butters lied there, covered in bruises, blood, and an intact ribcage.
Tweek had his skull crushed and intact.
Craig had blood-vomit and pills spilling out of his mouth.
Cartman was surrounded in vomit and his heart was taken out, beating swiftly.
Kyle was hanging from the ceiling with blood around his neck and on his fingertips.
Clyde was surrounded by berries and vomit.
Stan's whole body was mangled, with bits of his car penetrating his chest and back, and with empty beer bottles surrounding him.
Then there was Karen.
She laid right on the bed in front of Kenny in a puddle of blood and brain matter.
Kenny tried to scream, but only more blood came out.
"H-heee-eeeeel-"
Everything went black.
A/N: Well shit guys, that's the end. I decided that instead of having two chapters for Kenny to have one long, final chapter.
Ended up taking a lot of work, and I wrote around 3000 words for this one, but overall, I'm happy with the ending.
Kenny might not be, but it's okay. I like writing his suffering for my entertainment.
I hope you enjoyed reading his suffering for your entertainment.