Will you marry me?
Usal na lumabas sa labi ko ang pangalang iyon. Ang ngising tila normal na naka-plaster sa kaniyang labi ay lalong lumawak.
"You remember me, huh?" he sounds so silly while murmuring that.
Tumikhim ako. Hindi pa rin ako makapaniwala na makakasalubong ko siya rito.
"T-tyron... ikaw pala..." kunwang nakahuma na ako sa gulat kahit ang totoo ay hindi pa naman.
Tumayo siya ng tuwid. He put both of his hand on the pocket of his jeans. Mas nagmukang nanunudyo siya sa ginawa lalo at 'di nawawala ang pamilyar na kaangasan sa kaniya. Batid kong ang pinakikitang ekspresyon ng mukha niya at aura ay iba sa ipinakikita ng kaniyang mapaglaro ngunit madidilim na mga mata.
"Di I startle you?" he asked. He shook his head on a funny way.
"I just happen to know I'll find you here," he wiggled his brows.
Nangunot ang noo ko. He knows that I am here?
"One of the body guards that Troi sent you is my friend," he reasoned out. Mas may bahid na ng kaseryosohan ang boses.
Umawang ang labi ko pero pagkuway tumango. So, we didn't bump to each other accidentally. He came here on his own.
Ito na ba ang pagkakataon para makapagtanong ako? About what he said on his mother's party? About our past? If we really have one.
I heard his sighed. Bumalik ako sa reyalidad.
"Look, Rosalie. It's not my intention to confuse you..." He pursed his lips.
Mukhang may gusto pa siyang sabihin pero nagtatalo ang isip niya kung itutuloy.
"I didn't know this is fucking hard to do," I heard him cursed himself.
Nag-iwas siya ng tingin sandali. Ilang ulit niyang binasa ang kaniyang labi bago sinalubong uli ang tingin ko.
"Rosalie, aren't you curious of your past?" The last part of his question slowed down.
I can tell that he's trying to see if this is the right time to ask me that. Why? Sasabihin niya ba sa akin lahat? Tutulungan niya ba akong makaalala? Is it because he wants his twin mad at him again or is it something more?
"What is it to you, Tyron?"
I made my voice cold. I really wanted to remember everything and he will help me, that will be my advantage. However, I need to be certain that he won't cause harm to me. Na wala siyang hidden agenda sa gagawin niya at bukal ang magiging pagtulong.
Baka mamaya, ginagawa niya lang 'to just so in the end, sabihin niya sa kapatid niya at pagsimulan namin ng away ni Troi. Sa ngayon, hindi ko kailangan ng problema sa buhay mag-asawa namin dahil hindi ko pa tapos ang issues sa sarili kong nakaraan.
I watched as his jaw tightened when I dropped my question. Mukhang hindi niya inaasahan na magiging malamig ang pakikitungo ko sa kaniya. I just want to trigger something, though. Para siya na ang magkumpirma.
"Look, babe- I mean, Rosalie..." pinakawalan niya ang mga kamay sa bulsa.
"I just want to help you remember. Like you, may mga katanungan din ako at alam mo na kung ano iyon."
Naging seryoso ang kaniyang mga mata. Miski boses ay tinakasan na rin ng mapaglarong tono.
"I don't know how did you end up with Troi? anim na buwan kang hindi nagpakita and then I'll found you beside my brother? Married?"
I can hear frustrations on his voice. Indeed, he's here not to be playful. I guess this is the answer to my question whether he's up to something or he just really want to help.
Dali-dali kong hinila ang kamay niya at hinatak siya patungo sa pinakadulo ng bookstore. Hindi ako nahirapan dahil mukhang alam niya na ang gusto kong mangyari. Malalaki ang mga hakbang ko.
"God, I miss this..." I heard him whispered.
Hindi ko na iyon pinagtuunan ng pansin.
Nang madala ko siya sa pinakadulong bahagi ay saka ko siya hinarap.
"Tell me about it, Tyron," I demanded.
Binasa ko ang labi ko at luminga-linga bago sumulyap uli sa kaniya.
"Tell me everything you can tell me," pag-uulit ko. Mas madiin na ang bawat banggit ng salita.
He nodded, inhaled before he speak.
"You went out of my contact for six months now, Rosalie. I didn't know if you went mad at me because I am demanding for label or what. You no longer go to work. Ang manager mo, walang alam kung bakit bigla ka na lamang nag-AWOL. Even your office mates. Lahat kami wala. Even your relatives in the province knows nothing about your whereabouts."
He bit his lips. I just watched him let go of his frustrations. Pinanonood ko kung nagsasabi ba siya ng totoo base sa reaksyon niya. Label? Then we must be really something!
"I did my best to find you. I found out something but this marriage of you with my brother? Wala akong nalaman tungkol dito. That's why I was rigid when I saw you with him. The woman I've been missing and looking for months is with my rival!" he almost hiss the last words.
I can hear him panting. Sunod-sunod ang naging paglunok ko.
He found out something except for my marriage with his brother? Why? Troi told me his family had met me before? Bakit si Tyron, hindi? How come no one knows that I am married to him? Sikreto ba ang naging kasal namin?
He introduced me to his cousins and they don't look like they are happy for us. Mukhang miski sila ay walang alam sa nangyaring kasal?
But the pictures he showed me... mukhang engrande iyon. I am smiling widely at that and so is he. Nandoon pa ang pamilya ni Troi sa litrato. Paanong...
"Rosalie, I know this is too much for you. Sabihin mo sa akin kung hanggang saan lang ang naalala mo?"
I gritted my teeth. I can remember my college memories and none of them were close to me. Ni hindi nga ako sinusulyapan ni Tyron at si Troi, he's just always in the clinic but we never interact with each other.
"P-paano mo ako nakilala?" Nanginginig ang boses ko nang magtanong.
"You told me you're courting me. Paano tayo nauwi sa pagliligawan?"
He held his breathe for a minute.
"I... I happened to date one of your officemate and then I... you caught my attention and I tried my luck. Although I know you're out of reach, I still tried my best," he wet his lips and continued. "You blocked me first, told me you don't want a manwhore in your life but I showed you how sincere I am and I melted your walls, babe. You ended up having feelings for me, too. It's just that you're afraid of commiting yourself to something you're not sure if it'll work."
My fist crumpled. So, Tyron and I...
"I've been courting you for almost a year, Rosalie. At kahit isang beses, hindi ka nagtanong tungkol kay Troi o kay Tross. I am the one who told you about them. Wala kang kilala sa kanila personally."
Tumango-tango ako. I'm trying my best to absorb all the information from him. He courted me and I went out of reached that no one could tell him where am I. Nag-AWOL sa trabaho at most importantly, kahit sila Tita walang alam sa nangyari sa akin?
Hindi nila alam na kinasal ako at naaksidente? Sa mga kwento ni Tyron, nasaan ang bahagi ng nakaraan namin ni Troi?
I flinched when he tried to hold my hand. Mukhang nagulat siya roon kaya umatras. Pain crossed his eyes.
"I was in so much pain after I found out about your marriage. It's real, Rosalie..." his voice cracked.
Wala akong nagawa kundi titigan ang ekspresyon niyang unti-unting nababasag.
"You married my brother instead of me..."
I sobbed. My heart twisted in pain. Apektadong-apektado ako sa mga salita niyang binitawan. As if I did him really wrong. How? How does this happened?
Lumapit siya sa akin. He cuffed my face and his thumbs brushed my tears. Nagiging malabo ang paningin ko pero malinaw sa akin ang emosyon sa kaniyang mata.
"Shhh... Stop crying. You know I hate to see you crying," he said, trying to make his voice playful.
I sniffed. He's trying to lighten the situation.
"I'm sorry, Tyron..." nanginginig ang mga labi ko nang bitawan ang mga salitang iyon.
Kinalma ko ang sarili ko. Ilang beses kong pinahiran ang pisngi ko gamit ang panyo. He watched me composed myself and when I did, he avoided my eyes. Bumagsak ang tingin niya sa kamay ko.
Nagtagal iyong tingin niya roon. His brows furrowed. Sinundan ko ang tingin niya at napagtantong sa singsing sa daliri ko siya nakatingin.
Tumikhim ako.
"I wanted to remember so bad, Tyron. So bad that I will believe your story. I will hold on to it." My voice was hoarse due to crying.
"I will try to remember everything so I could explain why I left you hanging. Sa ngayon," suminghot ako at mapait na ngumiti. "Magpapanggap muna akong walang alam."
His eyes never leave mine. He nodded after a brief moment.
"I hope for your memories fast recovery, Rosalie. Because I know, there is something more with your marriage. I'll do my best to help you find it out."
Isang ngiti ang pinakawalan ko. I sniffed once again.
"We should part ways now..." I said and was about to turn my back against him when he stopped me by holding my elbow.
Muli, naalala ko ang isang pagkakataong kasama si Tyron sa memoryang bumalik sa akin.
"Give me your number. I'll give you some information when I find one."
Nilingon ko siya nang nakakunot ang noo. Maaring mahuli kami kung sakali.
"Secretly..." he begged.
Lumunok ako at pagkuway kinuha ang cellphone niya at doon ay nagtipa. Inabot ko sa kaniya iyon nang matapos at dali-daling tumalikod.
Nagtungo ako sa book shelves na nasa gitnang bahagi. Kumuha lang ako ng ilan doon nang 'di na binabasa ang mga blurb o even ang title. Sa tingin ko ay mahabang oras na ang ginugol ko sa loob at ayaw kong magtaka na ang mga bodyguards na iniwan ko sa labas.
Five steps away from the bookstore's entrance when I spotted one of them talking to someone over the phone. Nagmamadali akong marating ang pwesto nila.
"She's here now, Sir. Kalalabas lang po," ani isang bodyguard sa kausap.
He must be talking to my husband. I confirmed it when he handed me his phone.
"H-hello..."
I bit my lowerlip when I stuttered.
"Are you okay, love?" There is worries on his voice.
I smiled. "Yeah. I am. Aren't you busy? Bakit ka napatawag?"
Sinulyapan ko ang mga bodyguard na ngayon ay nasa gilid ko na.
"I just asked them if you're enjoying. I'm sorry I'm not there," aniya sa kabilang linya.
"Ayos lang naman. Ilang book lang naman 'to..."
"Buy anything for yourself. You can have the whole day."
I scoffed at that. "You know I won't do that, love. We'll go home now. Medyo pagod na rin kasi ako," pagdadahilan ko.
Sa usapan namin ni Tyron, sa tingin ko ay sapat na iyon sa impormasyon na hinangad kong makuha ngayong araw. Hindi man ako nakaalala ngayon, may nalaman naman ako sa nakaraan ko.
"You sure?" he asked.
I hummed. Voices filled my ears when the other line went chaos. May umiiyak at may nagmamadali sa pagsasalita.
"I'm sorry, love. I need to hang up." Kalmado ang pagsasalita niya pero hindi ang background niya.
Hindi na ako sumagot at hinayaang maputol ang linya. Matipid ang ngiting ibinalik ko iyon sa bodyguard before I told them that I wanted to go home. Agad naman itong sumunod.
Sa sasakyan pa lang, nararamdaman ko na ang sunod-sunod na pagba-vibrate ng cellphone ko sa purse. Hindi ko nga lang iyon binibigyang pansin dahil ayaw kong makita ng driver na nakakatanggap ako ng texts. He might tell Troi about it.
Napapapikit ako nang mariin kapag naiisip kong malaking kasalanan ang ginagawa kong paglilihim sa asawa ko. Kaya lang, kung hindi ko ito gagawin para makaalala, habangbuhay na kulang ang pagkatao ko.
I bid my goodbye to the bodyguards before shutting the door. Mabilis kong kinuha ang cellphone ko sa purse at dali-daling nagtungo sa comfort room malapit dito sa living area.
I was indeed bombarded with texts messages.
Unregistered number:
About what I've found out. Although I don't want to tell you this because it might break you but I need to. I'm sorry, Rosalie. You were raped.
My heart clenched. I know that already but to confirm it is another thing.
Unregistered number:
I'm doing my best to give you justice. Wait for it, Rosalie. I won't let those fuckers get away from their crime.
I managed to type a reply.
I browsed more with my heavy breathing.
Unregistered number:
Don't blame yourself. I will always be here for you. We'll find out everything, babe.
Unregistered number:
And Rosalie, six months ago, Troi was humored to get married.
I gasped. I bit my lips as I stared blankly and confused by the last message he sent.
Unregistered number:
Not to you but to his long-term girlfriend, Evangeline.
My hands started to tremble. The informations that Tyron gave me earlier about our past connection is already too much to handle. What more now that this information is burning something inside me.
Was this all true?
Nanginginig akong nagtipa. I wanted to know who it is. Who is Evangeline? And where is she right now? I want to know whether the information he gave me is true.
My phone vibrated once again. I am holding my breathe as I opened it.
Unregistered number:
Evangeline Raquel Mejares. Troi's girlfriend for three years.
My eyes started to water as I delete all of Tyron's messages after I thank him. The next thing I did is search about a woman named Evangeline Raquel Mejares.
Indeed, she is quite popular. A lot of news headlines popped up after I pressed the search button.
"A well-known socialite from a family of politicians, Evangeline Mejares. The youngest daughter of senatorial candidate, Ivanson Mejares Sr..." I read the first headline.
There's a picture of a woman wearing a simple yet elegant white dress. A bright angelic smile was plastered on her lips as she looks straight to the camera.
I swiped upwards. Another headlines welcomed me.
Evangeline Mejares went popular for being an eye-catcher as she graced the Yuan fashion week on July 23rd.
The same woman is wearing a hot pink top which hugged her curves perfectly while her bottom is a pleated skirt which gives volume to her body shape. Her intimidating eyes speaks power as she posed in front of the camera.
I found another one.
Evangeline Mejares was spotted dinning with someone in Paris.
A picture of the woman titling her head while smiling adorably to a man who's face is hidden by Evangeline's figure.
I browse more when I found something that caught my attention.
Instagram.com (@evangelinemdr)
Out of curiosity, I downloaded the app. Lumabas ako sa comfort room at nagtungo sa kusina para kumuha ng maiinom at mapakalma ang sarili.
When the app is finally on my screen, I immediately made an account. Kung anong username na lang ang inilagay ko. I don't intend on using it often. Gusto ko lang ma-stalk ang babaeng sinabi ni Tyron.
I typed her username at agad na lumabas iyon. She has one point seven million followers. Sa profile pa lang, halatang may sinasabi na. Bumungad sa akin ang kauna-unahang post niya.
It's a picture of a Evangeline's tummy and the second one is a copy of ultrasound result. Her captions says, 'excited to meet you soon, baby...'
Namumuo na ang kung ano sa loob ng tiyan ko paakyat sa dibdib.
I browse more.
A picture of a stethoscope. A brand new one in a box.
'for my beloved doctor.'
A picture of a wedding invitations with some of stunning giveaways with a caption...
'preparing...'
Kumabog ang dibdib ko. Naghuhuramentado iyon at nakakasakit na. Pinagpatuloy ko ang pagtingin sa mga posts niya hanggang sa marating ko ang isang post na halos gumimbal sa akin.
'soon to be a del rico. so excited to be a part of your fam. thanks mom, dad, for the blessing.'
The first slide is a diamond ring on her finger. Someone's hand is holding hers while she's flexing the diamond. A familiar hand. The second slide is a picture of her fiance's smiling widely while she kissed him on the side of his lips. Her hand is encircled on his nape.
Those pictures already wreck me inside but the third and last picture... it's Evangeline and my husband, Troi, in the middle, with all of his cousins and parents, smiling happily and their background says,
'will you marry me?'
I got dizzy while my eyes are blurred. Even with that, my mind can still perfectly see the happy moments of my husband with Evangeline. My phone vibrated again. I had a glimpse of my husband's name on it.
Hindi ko na iyon nabigyang pansin nang nag-uunahang kumawala ang hikbi sa labi ko hanggang sa mauwi ito sa paghagulgol. Parang sinsilaban ang dibdib ko at nagdudulot iyon ng walang humpay na sakit.
Walang katumbas ang sakit noon kaysa pisikal na sakit na maaring natamo ko sa aksidente.
Parang pinupukpok ang ulo ko dahil din sa mga nalaman. I can hear the buzzing of my phone. Kahit malabo, nakita kong tawag iyon. Hindi mula kay Troi kundi sa unregistered number.
Nanginginig ang mga kamay na sinagot ko iyon. Hindi ako makapagsalita.
"Rosalie, Evangeline. She's dead. She died in an accident six months ago."
I gasped for air. What could've gone wrong? What happened? How did she die?
"Rosalie?" the voice called my name with worries and hesitations.
"Rosalie, are you there? Answer me, please..."
He begged but I can no longer do that when I am gasping for air. I cannot breathe properly. Gaano ko man hagilapin ang hangin, hindi ko magawa. I clutched at my chest due to the uncontrollable pain. I tried to stand up and dragged my feet to the cabinet where I store my inhalers.
With my shaky hands trying to have a grip of the cabinet's handle, my phone slipped and crashed through the cold floor. The screen went off as my consciousness followed.
"She seems stress, dude. What are you doing to her? Are you that heartless?" I heard a somehow familiar voice inches away from me.
There is a hand caressing my cheek and it stopped for a moment.
"Shut up, Syg! I didn't do anything to her. I haven't done anything yet..." his last few words tone down.
I heard someone huffed sarcastically.
"Putting her in this kind of fucking situation is already off, dude. Baliw ka na."
"You know what I've been through, Sygfrid..."
The voice, it took me a minute before I could recognized my husband's voice. And Syg...frid?
Something crossed my memory. Someone uttered the same name and it happened that the man I heard right now has the same voice in my memory.
I tried not to winced because of headache. I don't want them to know that I am already conscious now.
"Yes, I know the pain you've been through because of Evangeline. But I'm warning you now, Troi. The next thing you'll be, it's hell. And that's because you're playing with fire and I can see that you're starting to get burnt."
Troi's heavy sighed followed the vanishing footsteps I've heard before I could finally breathe properly.
The white ceiling of our bedroom welcomed me once again. I smiled bitterly.
What now, Rosalie? What's the next thing you're going to find out? What's Sygfrid's talking about?