Sirius and several other miscreants sat quietly, mulling over their misfortune as Filch lectured them. It was a Hogsmeade weekend, so everyone one was extra sullen about being in detention. Kat suddenly entered the room, interrupting Filch mid-lecture. Sirius met her eyes and gave her a questioning glance, but she just winked at him.
"Um, sir? I have some ideas on how we can improve the cleaning of this school." Kat said confidently.
"Are you daft?" sneered Filch. "Get out."
"McGonagall sent me." Kat added, hoping to change his mind.
Filch sighed and said "Let's talk about it later." He turned toward a Gryffindor 3rd-year who was attempting to sneak out the door behind him and sent her a nasty glare until the poor girl sat back down.
As Filch was turned away, Kat used the opportunity to motion to Sirius. She pointed to the back of the room emphatically. He just gave her confused looks.
"The window." she angrily mouthed. She was disappointed to find that Sirius still didn't understand. She increased her volume. "Window!"
Filch turned back around and she smiled innocently. "Why are you still here?" Filch frowned.
"As you know, we have a couple really important Ministry officials coming to visit... " Kat said quickly. Filch grunted in response. Sirius, finally realizing what she was trying to tell him, slowly made his way to the back of the room as Kat continued to distract Filch. Filch began to turn, but Kat quickly grabbed his arm to stop him. She inwardly cringed as his sleeve was slimy.
"And?" Filch said, annoyance clear on his face.
"Oh my god. You're quite muscular! You don't take steroids, do you? Because I've heard steroids can severely disintegrate your brain capacity... and also your package." Kat ranted. Taking in Filch's perplexed expression, she continued. "You don't know what steroids are do you? Must be solely a muggle thing. Though I figured the magical world would have an equivalent? I guess they're not called steroids but- "
"Why are you still touching me?" Filch narrowed his eyes at her and Kat obediently let go. The classroom murmured, and Kat looked behind Filch to see that that Sirius had made it to the back and was struggling to open the centuries-old window.
"That's not the point." Kat continued.
"Alright. What is?" Filch asked, wrinkling his nose at her. He tried to turn again after hearing creaking noises but Kat stopped him.
"The point is, Peeves is a nuisance. He spilled orange juice on a poor kid this morning and I was thinking. I devised a plan that will enable us to finally get rid of him."
"Which is?" Filch gave her a yellowed smile. She had his attention now.
"To a man as smart as you it must be obvious..." Kat declared, racking her brain for an idea.
"Which is?" Filch repeated, his ugly smile becoming more terrifying. Sirius promptly wrestled the window open and glanced back at Kat.
"A vanishing spell?" Kat said finally.
"No, that wouldn't work. I got Dumbledore to try that years ago." Filch grumbled. Sirius took this moment to jump out the window. A loud crashing noise could be heard from outside. A couple of the students chuckled and Filch turned around to glare at them.
"Oh!" Kat said loudly. "Guess I won't waste your time then. Bye!"
By the time Filch turned back around, the door had banged shut and Kat was sprinting down the hall. She was really hoping Alice's levitating charm had worked, but judging by the sound she heard, Sirius might have broken a couple of bones.
She made it outside and found Alice crouched in a bush with a groaning Sirius.
"I'm so sorry! Are you hurt?" Alice squeaked.
"What the bloody hell happened?" Kat asked.
"I used a levitating charm on him for a while... " Alice started to say.
"Then she dropped me!" Sirius cried out. "Into freezing snow!"
"I'm sorry! I haven't practiced that much so it was honestly a miracle it worked at all." Alice said. Sirius' eyes widened and he looked over at Kat, who was laughing.
"You left me in her hands?" Sirius questioned. Kat just shrugged. "I thought you liked me!"
"It wasn't even that high!" Alice defended. "You landed in a pile of snow!"
"I think my arm is broken, Alice! How could you?" Sirius continued dramatically.
"If you're still in one piece, we can go on that date now." Kat said, handing him his coat. "Unless you changed your mind?"
Sirius immediately got up. He planted a soft kiss on her lips and grabbed her hand. "Let's go."
Kat didn't fight it. She turned away and waved goodbye to Alice so that Sirius wouldn't see her smile.
"Where do you wanna go first?" asked Sirius.
"Three Broomsticks."
"Not Madame Puddifoot or whatever?"
Kat stopped walking and gave him a look. "Do you really think I want to go to that sappy cafe?"
"Alright, alright." chuckled Sirius, squeezing her hand. "I can't thank you enough for helping me sneak out of detention."
"No problem."
"I thought for sure I was busted when I slammed into the bush. So how did you keep him distracted?"
"I dazzled him with my Ravenclaw wits."
"You fooled Filch! You're basically a legend now." Sirius said and she laughed. There was a short silence and then Sirius continued. "So what's your excuse?"
"For?"
"Acting the way you do. Once you're not angry at me, you're a really cool person."
"I don't like to do what people expect. Why should I live up to other people's expectations instead of my own?"
"So you disappoint them from the start and then you're covered?"
"Something like that"
"Then you screwed up."
"What?"
"You never disappointed me." Sirius said, watching her face turn pink.
"Not even when I dumped water on your head?" Kat asked, meeting his steady gaze.
Sirius let out a bark-like laugh and said, "I was actually pretty impressed by that."
Kat smiled in response. Sirius stopped walking and pulled Kat to a stop as well. When she turned to him in confusion, he left a lingering kiss on her lips.
"I couldn't wait until we got there." Sirius grinned at her. Kat just roller her eyes and punched him lightly.
"I hate you."
"See that, there? Who needs affection when I have blind hatred?" Sirius joked and Kat giggled.
Then, they walked hand in hand down the long, cobblestone road to Hogsmeade, talking about quidditch the rest of the way.
****
"He got in much trouble for this. I said grand romantic gesture, not humiliate yourself in public while breaking multiple school rules." Remus sighed. It was late Saturday night, and after having fun at Hogsmeade and then coming back to Hogwarts to plant some pranks, Peter, James, and Remus were waiting for Sirius to get done with detention.
"You have to admit, it was pretty funny to watch." James objected.
"At least your CD player wasn't broken to bits by Slughorn." Peter pouted.
The door opened and several disgruntled students filed out, cursing under their breath. Sirius was not among them.
James stopped one of the Gryffindor kids and asked "Wasn't Sirius in detention with you?"
"He was. Then his girlfriend helped him escape. Lucky duck." the girl said sourly, pushing past the flabbergasted trio.
"Girlfriend?" James exclaimed.
"Escape?" Remus called after her.
"Lucky duck?" Peter blurted out. "What a weird saying."