Discussion question! If you could make any reoccurring Glee Character into a main character, who would it be?
For me, other than Sebastian, obviously, I'd really like to see more of Rory or Ryder. Ryder really got the short end of the stick, and no one really talks about the fact that Marley literally dumped him because he rescheduled a date to see a doctor that specialized in dyslexia, which he had just found out he had. I felt like this was super unfair of Marley and no one ever really mentions it again. And Rory is my baby and deserved more than that weird episode where he and Artie fight over Sugar.
Sebastian stared at the purple discoloring on his wrist. It was almost beautiful, really. A swirl of color on his pale skin that had the faint shaping of fingers gripping too hard. He knew he shouldn't let Hunter get away with everything he does, but he also knew what it would look like if he told anyone. He'd be the spoiled rich kid throwing a tantrum when he didn't get what he wanted. No, he wouldn't say anything, for now.
He tore his gaze away from his wrist as he pulled down his sleeve and looked at the text from Sam Evans for what felt like the hundredth time.
Here's Barry's phone number and address. In case you change your mind.
Followed by a phone number and Aunt Millie's address. He wanted to call his brother so badly it almost hurt. But Barry had made it clear he didn't want to talk to him. It had to be done. With a deep breath, Sebastian deleted the message, and it felt like he was officially cutting himself out of Barry's life, for good.
Sebastian forced himself to stand and walked towards the choir room, ready to face another rehearsal with Hunter.
*****
"As president and vice president, we can pretty much decree whichever parts we want, right?" Sam asked Blaine as they signed up for Grease auditions.
"I'm not sure I'm gonna do the musical this year," Blaine said miserably as he leaned against the bulletin board. "I'm not in the right headspace to do a project like Grease. Since Kurt and I broke up, I haven't slept, I lost my appetite. I don't even gel on weekends."
"This is pretty serious, then," Sam said somewhat sarcastically.
"Sam, Kurt was my soul mate. We talked about spending the rest of our lives together. About retiring in Provincetown and buying a lighthouse and starting an artists' colony. And now he won't even return my calls. He won't text me. And that Gilmore girls box set I sent him was returned to me, unopened. He's gone. Maybe forever.
"Dude, I get it, except for the lighthouse part.," Sam said, comfortingly. "But look, everybody's been there. You'll get through it."
Blaine sighed and walked away slowly with a far-off look on his face.
"What's up with Blaine?" Barry asked as he walked up and stared at Blaine.
"Relationship issues," Sam said simply. "Hey, I'm sorry about Friday, by the way. We shouldn't have gotten involved like that."
Barry shrugged, "It's okay, you guys were just trying to help. My relationship with my brother is complicated, though."
Sam thought for a moment. Sebastian wouldn't make the first move and talk to Barry because he thought Barry didn't want to talk to him. Maybe. . .
"Hey, Barry. I have his number, do you want to talk to him? You guys could work things out, and I'm sure Seb-Nathaniel misses you."
Barry shook his head, "If he missed me he wouldn't have left in the first place. Besides, I have nothing to say to him."
Sam sighed. Maybe Sebastian was right not to reach out to his brother, "Anyways, you doing the play?"
"Mr. Schuester already said I could work backstage," Barry answered.
"You're not going to try out for a part?"
"No way! The glee club is one thing, but the school musical, not my thing. I worked backstage at my old school and that was pretty fun. Which part are you going for?"
"Kenickie," Sam said instantly. The rest of the conversation was about the musical, Glee Club, and their upcoming history test, but Sam couldn't help but think about Sebastian and Barry.
*****
Barry had had enough of Blaine's moping. He walked up to him during lunch and asked, "Okay, I don't care what happened between you and Kurt, but you need to snap out of this."
"How can I?" Blaine asked. "He won't even talk to me. We haven't even officially broken up."
Barry sighed, "I've never had a relationship like your's, Blaine, and I won't pretend to know what I'm talking about, but If he won't talk to you, it's probably because he knows it won't change anything. You'll still be broken up."
Blaine shook his head, "I know, but I-we can't move on unless we talk. Even if we never make up, even if we never speak again, we can't leave it like this. We need some kind of closure."
"What if he doesn't want to talk?" Barry asked.
"Then he can listen," Blaine answered. "I just want to talk to him when we've both had time to think and know what we want. In New York, we didn't talk because I had just told him. It was too hard. Now that he's had time to think about it, I just want to know where we stand. Even if that means breaking up."
*****
Barry was walking down the hallway and saw Finn coming from the other way with two other people about his age. One was an Asian guy and the other a dark-skinned girl.
"Hey, Finn," Barry smiled as they passed.
"Hey, Barry! Are you sure you don't want a part in the musical? We're going to need someone to play Danny Zuko since Blaine's not up for it," Finn said, giving him a hopeful smile.
Barry shook his head no, "Thanks, but Marley couldn't even convince me to try out to be an extra. No way am I going out for the lead. I don't even think I could do it. Sorry, but you'd be better off with someone else."
"You sure?" the other guy asked. "Even if it's not Danny, we're going to need more guys."
"It's not every day you find a guy who likes musicals and can sing," the girl added.
Barry shrugged, "Maybe. If you need any more people, let me know, but I'm not a good enough dancer to play Danny and I have no acting experience whatsoever."
"Okay, see you later," Finn said and the three walked off, talking to each other about other guys who might want to play Danny.
Barry made his way to the auditorium to watch Marley and Unique audition. They did Blow Me One Last Kiss by P!nk. After telling Finn, Artie, and the others what parts they were interested in, they ran off the stage together, and Barry gave them both a hug.
"You guys killed it!" Barry said, smiling.
"That was so much fun!" Marley said, "I hope I get the part. I want to do that again."
"If they don't give both of you the parts you want, I would think they're crazy."
"I don't know," Unique said, uncertainly. "I asked to play Rizzo."
"So? I've been watching everyone's auditions, you were definitely the best out of everyone who wanted that role."
"I know I was the best singer, obviously, but I don't know if they'd give me a girl's part."
Barry frowned, "I haven't known Finn and Artie for long, but I do know that they'll give the role to whoever's the most talented."
Unique nodded, still frowning, though. Barry gestured for them to follow him, "C'mon. I told Aunt Millie you were auditioning today and she said she would save us some pie."
"Yes!" Marley said excitedly, walking towards the exit. "Nothing like mediocre cafeteria pie to either celebrate or make yourself feel better about failure."
*****
"What are you so happy about?" Barry asked Sam, who was practically bouncing up and down in his seat.
"My younger siblings are coming to visit this weekend," Sam said, happily. "I haven't seen them in a month."
"Why not, if you don't mind me asking," Barry said as he took his seat.
"I'm staying with Finn's parents until I graduate since my parents live in Kentucky so I can go to McKinley. My siblings still live with them, though, so I don't get to see them often."
Barry smiled at how happy Sam was just to see his siblings, "You must really love them."
Sam nodded, "I love my parents and everything, but it's different with siblings, you know? Sometimes it feels like it's just you and them against the world. There's a special bond there. I'm just glad they have each other. I don't know if I could have left if they had to do it alone."
Barry just smiled and silently wondered if the universe was trying to send him a message. If so, the universe is a jerk.
*****
"Hey, Marls?" Barry said, carefully. He and Marley were in the lunch line. "Can I ask you something?"
"Sure. What is it, Barry?" Marley asked.
Barry bit at his lip, "I-uh. I found out Nate lives just a few towns over. And I'm wondering if I should talk to him."
Marley gave him a sad smile, "I was wondering when you would find out."
"You knew?"
"Of course I knew," Marley said. "Mom and I spent Christmas at Uncle Hayden and Aunt Lily's. I asked Nate if he was planning on getting in touch with you since he was back in the country and he said no."
"So he doesn't want to talk to me," Barry didn't blame his brother for not wanting to see him. After all, he had been awful to him when he had moved in with their uncle.
"He wants that more than anything in the world, Barry," Marley smiled, sadly. "But he said he wasn't going to force you to talk to him when you obviously didn't want anything to do with him."
Barry sighed, "I have to talk to him, don't I?"
"You don't have to do anything, Barry. But I think you owe it to yourself and Nate to at least talk about what happened. You guys were eleven when he left, you've both changed."
Barry nodded but didn't mention how he hadn't changed at all. It had taken all for this for him to realize that he was the one being unfair, not Nate. Barry had been used to getting bullied before his mom died, he could handle a little more. But Nate had been one of the most popular guys in school. And, instead of being there for him, Barry had cut everyone off. He had refused to talk to anyone and he was even colder to Nate when he didn't do the same. Then he never answered him when he sent letters or called. He had to make this right.
"My sixth period is Study Hall. Cover for me in Glee?" Barry said to Marley as they paid.
"Of course."
*****
Barry walked from McKinley to the bus stop and rode to Westerville. Luckily, the bus station was only a few blocks away from Dalton Academy. He took a few moments to take in the huge building. He had known Uncle Hayden was well off, but he hadn't expected this.
He walked in and found his way to the front office. The secretary, a young woman with long brown hair and kind eyes, gave him a smile, "Hi, how can I help you?"
"Um, I'm looking for Nathaniel Allen?" Barry said uncertainly.
The woman typed on her computer before frowning, "Hm, there's no student by that name."
"I think he may have changed his last name to Smythe," Barry remembered the conversation with Blaine and the others.
The woman typed again, "Oh, here he is. What's your name, honey? You can't visit him unless your name is on his visitor's list."
"Oh," Barry felt his heart sink. "Bartholomew Allen. But I'm probably not-"
"There you are!" The woman said. "Do you have any kind of ID?"
Barry pulled out his driver's license and showed it to her, "I'm actually on his list?"
"You're the first name on it," she said, nonchalantly, printing out a visitor's badge for him. "Here you go, just stick that on and you're good to go. Classes should be letting out in a few minutes, and his dorm is number 405."
Barry took the sticker badge from here and managed a "Thank you" before walking out. He was surprised that his name was on Nate's visitors' list in the first place. Let alone the first one. Barry barely gave a second of the day to thinking about his brother. He suddenly felt increasingly worse about how long it had taken him to get over something that had happened when they were kids.
He found room 405 and found that the door was unlocked. Barry couldn't help a smile as he remembered all the times Nate had forgotten to lock the door to the bathroom or their bedroom when they were kids. It would appear the saying "old habits die hard" applies in this situation.
Barry walked in and took in the room. One side was neatly organized, photographs and other mementos arranged neatly, though there was a jacket on hanging on the back of the desk chair. The other side, however, looked practically bare. There were no photos, trinkets, or any kind of personalization. In fact, the only indication that someone else was living in the room was a cup of pens and pencils on the desk.
Barry sat in the desk chair on the side with photos, mostly because he was bored and wanted to look. There was a snow globe with the Eiffel tower inside, tiny people going about their day. A photo of a calico cat laying upside down on a white couch. It was a very cute cat. A small poster for the Broadway production of "The Lion King" from a few years prior was hanging on the wall above the headboard.
Then an 8x10 photo in a simple white frame caught Barry's eye. It was of Barry and his mom. It looked like the Christmas before she had died while they were making cookies. Barry was sticking his tongue out playfully at the camera while his mom had a handful of flour, about to throw it at the person taking the picture. Barry smiled as a memory he had long since forgotten forced its way back into his mind.
"Are you sure you don't want any help?" His dad asked, he and Nate watching from behind the kitchen counter as Barry and his mom tried to make cookies.
"No!" His mom said. "You and Nate make the cookies every year. I should be able to do this,"
"Mom," Nate smiled, "Remember what happened when you tried to make spaghetti for dinner last week?"
"Shh, be quiet, honey, I'm trying to win a bet here."
His dad laughed, "Great lesson to be teaching the kids, honey. You should always gamble on something you don't know how to do."
"You be quiet too, Henry."
"Uh, mom?" Barry said, hesitantly. "Is it supposed to look like that?"
Their sugar cookie dough had somehow come out looking more like cake batter. It was way too thin as well as pure white instead of cream-colored and they had no idea what they had done wrong.
Nate slipped away and grabbed the camera, "Smile. We are forever remembering this day as that time Mom and Barry realized they should stay out of the kitchen until it's time to decorate."
Nate snapped a quick picture as Barry stuck his tongue out at his brother and their mom grabbed a large pinch of flour and flicked it at him, "Hey!"
Nate grabbed the extra bag they had gotten and threw a handful back at her. She laughed and, before long, the kitchen was a white, powdery mess and they all looked like ghosts.
Barry smiled. He had forgotten all about that year. It had taken forever to clean up the kitchen, and his dad and Nate had ended up making the cookies, but they still decorated them together, like always, and his dad had given his mom a bag of flour as a gift that year.
He remembered the next Christmas, too. It's was just him, Joe and Iris. And, as much as he wanted to forget it, another memory made its way through Barry's mental block.
"Hey, Barry, this one came for you a few days ago," Joe held out a cardboard box with their address on it. There was a white note card taped to the outside, as well.
Barry, I wanted to come back to Central for Christmas, but Aunt Lily had a last-minute business trip to California and I had to go with her. I'm planning on visiting Dad in the new year, so maybe we can meet up then. I hope you like the gift, I wasn't sure what to get you.
Love, Nate.
Barry stared at the package for a few minutes before putting it on the floor and sliding it towards the front door.
"Barry?" Iris asked.
"I don't want it."
"Come on, Barry, you sent back his birthday present, too," Joe pleaded. "At least open it."
Barry grabbed his gift for Joe and shoved it at him, "No. I don't want to talk to him, and I certainly don't want any of his bribes."
"He's not bribing you, Barry," Iris said, defensively. "He's being a good brother."
"Then why did he leave?"
"We've been over this, Barry, Nate just wasn't happy here anymore. I've talked to him a few times and he's doing well in Ohio," Joe said, putting the gift down, gently. "I wish you would at least talk to him."
"I don't want to talk to him. I don't want to hear about him. I don't even want to think about him."
Barry tore his gaze away from the photo. Even after everything. After the way he had treated him, Nate still kept a photo of him next to his bed. Granted, it could have been because of their mom, but he must have hundreds of other pictures of her.
Next to it was their parents' wedding photo. Barry smiled and thought about the identical one in his own bedroom. He had put it there more as a symbol than a memory. It was a reminder that his dad was innocent and that, one day, he would prove that.
And then there was a sick feeling again as he realized that Nate had a photo that he certainly shouldn't have if Barry's thoughts about him were true. He had always thought Nate had left because he actually believed their dad killed their mom and that he was ashamed. This picture, out in plain sight in a room that wasn't even locked, proved that wasn't true.
"Calm down, Hunter, I'm just going to put my bag down," A somewhat familiar voice said from the other side of the door.
The doorknob turned and Barry felt a brief wave of panic and regret. What was the thinking? He should have just called. What are the odds that he dies jumping out of a fourth-floor window?
But then he looked his brother in the eye for the first time in over four years and he felt nothing but regret that he hadn't done this sooner.
"Barry?" Nate asked after a moment of silence between the two. "What. . . What are you doing here?"
"I-I needed to talk to you. I'm sorry. For everything. I shouldn't have been so mad at you for leaving. I shouldn't have shut you out after Mom died. I-"
He was cut off by his brother taking a few steps forward and pulling him into a hug, "Shut up for once."
Barry smiled over his brother's shoulder, "What makes you think I'm going to start listening to you now?"
"I'm the oldest," Nate pulled back with a huge smile. "You have to."
He rolled his eyes, affectionately, "By twelve minutes."
Nate sat down on his bed and Barry followed suit, "So what made you decide to come to my school out of the blue instead of just calling? I'm guessing you didn't decide to forgive me out of the blue."
Barry looked down at his hands, a little embarrassed, "It was a lot of different things. I realized I wasn't being fair just cutting you off like that. We're brothers, we're supposed to be there for each other. But I opened up to Iris and Joe before I even spared you a glance. And then I came here. And I saw your photos."
Barry looked at the pictures on the wall, "After all this time, after everything I did, you keep a picture of me. And Dad. I thought you gave up on him. On us. But I know better now. I hope you'll forgive me."
Nate opened the desk drawer and pulled out a folded picture and handed it to Barry, who opened it. It was the two of them on their eleventh birthday, "Barry, the only thing I've wanted these past years was for you to know I still believe in Dad. I didn't care if you still hated me for leaving, I just wanted you to know that I know he didn't do it. And since you do, I couldn't be happier."
Barry didn't know what to say, but it didn't matter, because the door opened at that moment and he saw the briefest flash of panic on Nate's face as a blonde boy opened the door, "Sebastian, what are you doing? Hunter's about to blow a casket!"
"Uh," Sebastian stuttered for a minute before Jeff locked eyes with Barry and he smiled.
"Oh, hey! So you're Seb's brother."
"Wait?" Sebastian suddenly regained the ability to speak. "You knew?"
"Of course I knew."
"How?"
Jeff rolled his eyes, "You left that birthday picture out on your desk one day and I came in looking for you and saw it."
"Why didn't you say anything?" Sebastian asked. Jeff couldn't even keep the tiniest of secrets. How on earth did he keep from mentioning this one to anybody?
Jeff shrugged, "Because you didn't. You never mentioned that you had a brother, so I wasn't sure what the deal with him was. For all I knew, he could have died or something and you didn't like to talk about him, I don't know. I know I'm no Einstein, but I'm not stupid to social cues."
Sebastian just blinked at him before Barry rolled his eyes at him and stood to leave, "I'm Barry. And, It sounds like you've got places to be, so I'll call you later, Na-Sebastian."
Sebastian nodded and stood to follow Jeff to the choir room when he realized Barry didn't have his number, "How-"
"I'll get in from Blaine!" Barry called from the hallway.
Sebastian laughed to himself and he and Jeff headed towards the choir room and he told him a brief summary of what the deal with him and Barry was. When they walked in, the room was dead silent, which was unusual. Hunter had his arms crossed and he looked ticked off, but that wasn't anything too out of the ordinary.
"There you are!" Hunter turned as they entered and scowled at him. "What took you so long?"
"I had something to deal with, Hunter, and I'm only fifteen minutes late. Surely you could have started without me, though I'm flattered you waited for me."
Hunter scoffed, "I was merely explaining our new training method. It proved to be very effective at my old school, and I believe it should be enough to get you all into shape in time for Sectionals."
Sebastian's eyes darted to the other Warblers, some of whom were whispering amongst themselves, but most looked shocked or scared, "And what is this method of yours?"
"Steroids."
Hey, so I know this wasn't my best work, and I'll probably edit it a bit later, but I really wanted to get something out for all of you who read this book. Thanks so much for the support, and be proud of yourselves for giving me a reason to upload twice in one month!
Until next time, stay weird, stay wonderful, and stay you!