"So Raelyn really left Evangeline to you?" Levi purses his lips. "No offense, but you have the maternal instincts of a pencil sharpener."
I don't defend myself. I can't, really. He isn't wrong. Every time I've been in a position to care for something helpless—babysitting my younger cousins, taking care of the family dog, remembering to feed my beta fish—I've failed wretchedly. Raelyn knew this. It makes no sense why she'd trust me to feed, clothe, and nurture the person she loved most on this entire planet.
"She must have been really desperate," he goes on. "Like, of all people, she picked you."
"I get it. I'm terrible with kids." I hug a heart-shaped pillow to my chest and close my eyes. "That's the thing, though, Levi. She had no one else. Her mom lost custody of her. Her grandmother died. Her dad abandoned her when she was still in diapers. There's only me."
"Well, there is one other option," he says.
I open my eyes. "And who might that be?"
"Evangeline's father. Duh."
I roll my eyes. I haven't thought about Marco Diaz in years. He's the douchebag who got Raelyn pregnant at sixteen and then bailed before the pee stick came back positive. I never approved of him, even before he walked out on Raelyn and Evangeline. He might be the only person on the planet who has less parental make-ups than me.
"Marco's not an option," I reply.
"Why not?"
"Because he just isn't, okay?"
"Then you have a choice to make," Levi says. "You can either let Evangeline become a foster kid, or you can step up and become her legal guardian like Raelyn wanted."
I let out a sigh. "Maybe," I begin, "we could just talk to Marco and, you know, see where he's at in life."
He smirks. "So now he's an option?"
I shake my head. "No, he's not. I hate him. He was a jerk to Rae and doesn't deserve to have Evangeline in his life, but he should at least know what's going on."
"Fair enough. When do you want to go?" Levi asks.
"How about tomorrow night?"
"Night? Why not during the day?"
"Because I have work tomorrow," I tell him.
He raises his eyebrows, a flabbergasted expression on his face. "You're going back to work already?"
"Well, yeah," I respond. "I don't really have a choice."
"I think your boss would understand if you took a few more days off."
"You obviously don't know Seth Lyon very well."
"I know he's a billionaire who owns half the city," Levi replies. "I also know that he's human, and he might understand if you need to take a few more personal days to cope with the death of your oldest friend."
"Sitting at home won't help me get over it. I need to get back to my life." And it's true. Eating ice cream in my pajamas was nice for a few days, but I can't make a habit of it. I still have a plan that I intend to stick to. "Besides, don't you have work, too?"
He shrugs his shoulders. "When I heard about Raelyn's passing, I told my manager I'd need some time off. She understood."
"Why'd you take time off? Like you said in your speech earlier, you barely knew Raelyn," I remind him.
"I know, but she was an important part of your life," he says, "and you're an important part of my life, so...."
I smile, and for the first time in five days, it's sincere. Levi Barnes is an angel among us. I'm lucky he deems me worthy of his time.
"We'll pay Marco a visit tomorrow night," I say, letting my eyes drift shut again. I'm both mentally and physically exhausted. "For now we should rest."
"You know that we don't actually live here, right?" he says with a chuckle.
"Right." I sit up and rub my tired eyes. "We should go home, shouldn't we?"
"Or you two could stay for dinner." My dad appears in the doorway, giving me a sense of déjà vu. "Mom and I ordered pizza. We got enough for everyone. Benson's already digging in, so I'd hurry if I were you."
Levi turns to me. "I'm in if you are."
"Yeah," I reply, "pizza sounds great."
Levi and I are about to head downstairs when I see Bowie poke his head into the hallway. He's still dressed in his suit and tie from the service. I want to scream at him—what he did today was deplorable—but his deer-in-headlights countenance stops me. Instead, I hold out my hand, gesturing for him to take it.
"Thought you were mad at me," he grumbles.
"I was," I admit, "but like you said, today isn't about me. It's about Raelyn."
A faint smile tugs at his lips. He slips his hand into mine and says, "I guess you can't help it. You've always been a princess."
"Ain't that the truth," Levi mutters.
I ignore him. "Mom and Dad got pizza," I tell my little brother. "We should eat it while it's hot. I guess Benson started without us."
I expect him to be happy. Pizza—or anything loaded with cheese, really—has always been his favorite meal. However, his mouth curves into a tight frown as he releases his grip on my hand.
"What's wrong, man?" Levi asks.
"I, uh, should get changed first. I don't want to get sauce on my suit coat," he says, retreating back into his bedroom. "I'll... I'll meet you guys down there."
He closes the door so fast that it gives me whiplash. Levi and I exchange a look.
"That was weird, right?" I whisper.
"Very," he agrees.
The reporter in me wants answers, but my mother's words of wisdom resound in my head: People handle grief differently, sweetheart. Maybe mood swings and psychotic outbursts are his way of dealing with Raelyn's death.
Maybe I should just let Bowie be.