"Oh God," Dean groaned. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."
He sits up, putting his head into his hands, covering his face.
He doesn't mean it?
"I mean, yes I do love you but now you're only going to think I do because we had sex," He explained and I looked at him confused. "No, I've been meaning to say it and it kind of just slipped out at a bad time, it's early in our relationship to, I'll understand if you do not feel the same."
I sit up, placing a hand on his shoulder, The blanket that was covering my torso fell, exposing my breast. God, what a terrible time, now I'm blushing. Luckily, Dean seemed to be only looking at my face with concern.
"Dean," I pause, trying to swallow the tension building up in my neck. "I love you too."
His eyes widen in shock before he tackles me in a hug, making me release uncontrollable giggles. He chuckles on top of me as he puts either arm on each side of me and lifts up, looking down at me with a smile.
"You have no idea how nervous I was to say it, I thought you'd think I was weird for saying it so early," he confessed.
I reach up and place my hands on each of his cheeks, smiling warmly at him. "I felt exactly the same way, Dean.
He chuckles, leaning down lightly and placing a passionate kiss on my lips. I kiss him back with just as much passion, smiling with joy into the kiss.
Dean loves me.
I doubted myself for no reason when he felt the same. Why must I always hide how I truly feel? It just makes me regret it in the long run. I knew I loved him and I should have just said.
This is the first relationship I have been in were when the person says I love you, I can tell that they mean it. From the kisses Dean gives me, to the look he always has in his eyes, to even just about twenty minutes ago in the careful way he took care of me, how was I so oblivious to his love? Yes, we may have fallen early, but we fell in the right direction, even if we still have so much to learn about each other. That will come as we continue to show just how much we love each other.
My mind was racing as his words bounced around in my head. He loved me, he really fucking loved me.
Dean pulls and looks me in the eyes, "I love you."
My heart fluttered, filling my eyes lightly with tears. "Yeah Dean, I love you too."
■■■
I slept the best I ever slept last night.
Dean and I's confession of love for each other has kept me in such an amazing mood. We both woke up happy and even went for a breakfast date.
We spent the entire date just laughing and joking around with each other. It was nothing we hadn't done before yet this time, it felt so different. It felt better.
After breakfast, we both went to the gym to work out for a bit. As we worked out, I texted Drew, Jeff, and Matt if they wanted to hang out later at a local bar with Dean and I. They immediately all said yes and that made my good mood increase even me. It was a good thing that Drew had to be in town for something last minute.
I told Dean and he said he'd love to but I could tell he was nervous. He would be alone with me and my friends for the first time and he hasn't even met them properly except Drew. Sure, he's worked with them but it's different when it's not at work and it regards your girlfriend's friends.
I suggested we bring Roman so he doesn't feel outnumbered and he was happy with that. He asked Roman if he wanted to and Roman agreed.
After we worked out for a good two hours, we raced each other upstairs like little kids, laughing the entire way. Luckily no one uses steps because we definitely could've hurt someone.
Once we reached the hotel room, we literally fought over who would shower first. He insisted that he go first because he was older which I quickly protested, calling him childish. After five minutes of fighting over the shower, he just let me go and I cheered. He just rolled his eyes at me playfully.
Now we both lay in one of the hotel beds just relaxing as we just wait until we go to the bar. My head rested on his chest as our legs intertwined at the end of the bed. His arms wrapped tightly around me as if he didn't want me to leave as his chin rested gently on the top of my head. The thought of that produced a small smile on my face.
"Alex," Dean suddenly said my name and I looked at him with concern. "Do you think we can make this last?"
His question threw me back a lot. We could make it work, what is he talking about? Can we?
"I mean," He clears his throat shakily and I place my hand on top of his, giving him a reassuring squeeze. "I'm screwed up, there's no doubt about that, but it's too much to handle. I can barely handle it. I don't want my problems to burden and embarrass you. I'm trying my best to hide them from you but it just gets harder and harder every day because we are so close already. I don't want to disappoint you."
I sit up and turn to face him, a frown displayed on his face.
I reach up and place my hands softly on either side of his face, looking into his eyes.
He looked so defeated, his eyes were so haunted. I knew he had a bad past and I still have no idea about but I'm willing to work with him because I love him. I want this to work because I love him.
I know I can't fix his problems but I can tolerate them. all he needs is someone to be there to guide him with support.
"Dean," I finally speak, smiling softly. "We will make it work because I love you and you love me. Your problems will never defeat that feeling because something like that is so rare."
I watch as he processed my words before a big smile spread across his face. He suddenly placed his lips against mine and laid me on the bed, hovering over me.
I kiss him back just as hard, wrapping my arms around his neck to get closer.
He pulls away out of breath before looking into my eyes. "I love you."
My heart fluttered at that and I quickly kissed him back, bringing him back down on top of me.
Let's just say, the next hour was filled with pleasure and fun.
■■■
The bar roared with music as Dean opened the door for me, letting me go first. I thanked him, placing my hand in his and intertwining our fingers. The boys had said that they were already here and were in a booth all the way in the back.
I lead Dean through the booming crowd of the dance floor. Why was it so packed? It was only a Wednesday.
I spot Jeff and smile, pulling Dean next to me.
"You ready?" I ask him, noticing he looked nervous.
"Do I have a choice?" He jokes and I smack his chest playfully.
He leans down slightly and places a quick kiss on my lips.
"What was that for?" I ask as we get close to the table.
"You look beautiful," was his answer.
No matter how many compliments he gives me, my cheeks will always get red. He is the only person who has that effect on me. Besides my fifth grade crush but that doesn't count, I was a child.
We make it to the table finally to find the joys in a heated discussion. About what? I don't know or care.
"Hello," I yell out slightly and they all stop to look at me.
Matt spotted us first and immediately stood up, opening his arms to me with a big smile.
"Matt!" I hug him tightly, smiling into his chest.
It's been so long since I've seen him. When he's not wrestling, he's with his family so I never see him backstage.
I pull away only to hug Jeff, "Jeff!"
I see him rarely backstage because his life is pretty much like Matt'.s They are big family men and I love that about them. I knew them when their life wasn't working out and to see how much they've grown makes me so happy. They deserve to be happy.
I give Drew a hug next but quickly pull away as he begins tickling me. Fucking asshole.
I push him to the side and turn to Roman. He gives me a big smile and I return it, hugging him slightly. It's crazy how we hated each other weeks ago and now we're friends.
I turn around to see Dean just standing there looking awkward. God, I hate how he has to feel like this. He deserves to feel happy and comfortable in his own skin and in public.
I walk up to him and grab his hand, letting my eyes find his. He intertwines our fingers and gives a smile that I know is fake.
"You'll be okay, they're nice people," I try to comfort him. "Just follow me."
I turn around, guiding him to the table. "I'm pretty sure you know each other but Jeff and Matt, this is my boyfriend, Dean Ambrose," Roman hollers and I send him a playful glare, causing everyone to chuckle.
Roman must know Dean as much as I do because he was the only one who really talked to him. I could tell he was just trying to make Dean comfortable.
"Now, we're here to have fun so don't none of y' all start your shit, " I playfully warn them, "I don't need y' all to play father I got my own for that."
The boys put their arms up in surrender jokingly as I slide into the booth next to Matt, Dean sitting next to me on the end. As soon as we sit, a waitress immediately comes up and ask us what we want to drink. We all answer as she places two menus down for us, quickly leaving to get our drinks.
I find Dean's hand under the table and intertwine it with mine. I give him a light squeeze for reassurance and he gives me a smile, unhooking our hands to throw it around our shoulder. Meanwhile, while we did this, the boys, more Roman and Jeff, began arguing about who was the best football team.
"Personally, I believe it's the Browns," Dean spoke up and all the boys looked at him with their mouths open.
"We're not doing this shit again Ambrose," Roman rubs his temple and I giggle.
"What, Ohio is where it is at!" Dean protested and the boys snorted.
"Please educate your boyfriend Alex and tell him that the Steelers are the best," Jeff said.
I shrug, 'My boyfriend's team is my team, sorry guys."
They all groan loudly causing Dean and me to laugh. He leans down and gives me a quick peck on my lips making the boys only grown louder.
"Sorry y' all don't have anyone," I joke and they roll their eyes.
"I'm married," Jeff, Roman, and Matt say in unison causing all of us to laugh.
"I'm single as hell what the fuck," Drew sighs making us all laugh even harder.
"It's because you're ugly," I say, immediately hiding behind Dean as Drew tries to smack me from across the table.
"Stop that shit," Matt said, swatting Drew's hand away.
Always the dad of the group.
I watch as the boys continue taking and I feel a smile find its way on my lips. I was happy that Dean got comfortable quick. He was talking to my family basically and they were getting along great.
I look over as Roman has a smile on his lips. It takes a few seconds before he realizes me staring. His smile only seems to grow wider.
"You changed him," Roman said quietly to me. "I don't know how but you did something to him because I've never seen him get so comfortable so fast."
I feel my heart squeeze a bit, hearing that meant everything. It made me feel important.
"Thank you," I tell him just as the waiter came back with our drinks.
"Alright now, what can I get y'all?"
■■■
After a long yet fun dinner, Dean and I were back in our hotel room swimming through whatever the hotel tv provided. I was so full, all I wanted to do was lay down and sleep.
When we got back to the hotel room, I all but stripped from my outfit and threw on one of Dean's shirts because it looked so much more comfortable. Of course, he made remarks that I looked good in it which, of course, made me blush.
He laid down first, kicking his shoes off before opening his arms for me to lay between. I did just that and we've been in this position since.
My head rested on his chest and every three seconds, I could hear his heartbeat. Something about it was soothing and it made me tired.
"Hey Alex," Dean suddenly said.
"Yeah babe?" I ask sleepily, moving my head so that I was now looking up at him and my chin rested on his stomach.
He smiles down at me, "You look so cute right now."
I smile back lazily, running my hand up his leg until it meets his hand and I intertwine them.
"Anyway, today made me realize something," he behins and I nod for him to continue. "You made me feel comfortable in my own skin today, something you've been able to do since I've met you and I've never had anyone else do that for me. You make me become a person I always wanted to be but was restricted to be."
My cheeks flush with color slightly, giving his hand a slight squeeze.
"What I mean to say is, I trust you so much and I did so quickly," he clears his throat. "I know it should scare me. but it doesn't. I want to let you in on everything in my life, something I've never done with anyone, not even Roman. You make me just want to spill everything about myself and I know it wouldn't matter because you don't care about that shit.
"I want to be honest with you, and I know you never rushed me to do it but I feel like I should," he concludes, leaving me to decide if I want to hear it or not.
I sit up and climb into his lap, putting each leg on either side of him. My hands travel up his body until they rest on his cheeks. The entire time, his eyes followed hands, now he was looking into my eyes.
"I love you and want to know everything about you," I tell him. "I don't care what is, at the end of the day I care about you and that's all that matters to me."
He smiles wide before pressing his lips softly to mine. I smile into the kiss, my heart beating fast.
He trusts me.
He loves me.
He is comfortable with me.
Everything that I feel with him is how he feels with me.
Nothing could ever beat how amazing this is. I'm happy and I want it to stay.
We pull away and I slide next to him, intertwining my hand with his as I lean my head on his shoulder.
"I'm ready," I tell him, giving his hand a little squeeze.
God, was I in for a show.
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I'm so sorry that my updated are so late and sloppy but school is consuming my life. I hope that once summer comes I can give this story what it deserves!
For the meantime, let me know what y'all think about the story. I love reading comments.