2019
As brief as his cat nap had been Zacky felt refreshed. Sleep was still a precious commodity and both he and Kelly grabbed it when they could. Provided that Sloane didn't need them. Whilst he was thrilled with Laine's help he still hadn't been able to step back enough to allow her to take control of the baby upon occasion. Her help with their meals though? That had been a godsend. It was good to know that someone was ensuring that he and Kelly weren't left to survive on a diet composed almost entirely of brie and crackers. It allowed him to focus on working with his band mates on their next album.
"Yo, Zack." Brian caught his attention. He hadn't even noticed his friend stand up. "You want one?" Brian gestured to the mini-fridge standing open with its selection of beers and other beverages on display. Brian held a bottle of water in one hand a beer in the other.
"A water?" Zacky asked confused because on the bashed up old coffee table sat Brian's nearly full bottle of beer. Why the fuck was he getting another one? He hoped that Matt was recording everything Brian played because if the guy was getting this wasted this early there was a good chance he wouldn't remember a single idea he'd had.
"No dickhead, a fucking beer. The water's for me. Steph is cool with me drinking while we work but she told me that if I wind up with a hangover because I've not been hydrating she's going to hide the pomegranate juice, the Coke, the coffee and every other good thing as well as serving me salad for the following three meals. In short, she'll make me suffer," Brian grimaced and then raised an ironic eyebrow. "So I'm making self-care a priority."
Zacky couldn't hold back his laughter. Sometimes Brian sounded like such a douche but he loved the guy. And Steph? She was one of the best things that had ever happened to the guy. She had her own series of quirks and in her own quiet way was just as much of a show off as his friend. Together they were magic.
"I hate to break it to you bro but drinking water while you knock back your second beer of the day before," Zacky glanced at his watch, "eleven in the morning doesn't exactly strike me as a high level of self-care. Maybe forgo the beer entirely?'
As if that was going to happen.
Brian gave him the expected look of deep offence before shaking his head adamantly. "I'm Synyster-fucking-Gates. Forgoing the beer would fuck with my process. So I'm drinking the water. Steph has inserted a microscopically tiny spy into our midst to report back on my water consumption." Brian gave Johnny, who was cheerfully refilling his own wine glass, a heavy dose of side-eye before turning back to Zacky and waving the beer bottle. "So do you want this or not so I can close the fridge door before Matt starts to complain about his electricity account like the old man that he is?"
"Fuck off asshole," Matt responded without heat as he once more focused on his notebook.
Zacky couldn't suppress his smile. It felt good to be back doing what they did. Although none of them would admit it the events of the last couple of years had shaken them all up. It was good to know that regardless of the changes in their personal lives when it came to the band their dynamic worked as well as it ever had. Even if the recent news of Elliot's death had put Jimmy back in the forefront of their minds. Brooks, being the chilled and considerate guy that he was, hadn't let it get to him. It was good to know that he felt secure in his place in the band.
"Fine," Zacky held out an imperative hand, "give me a fucking beer. Kelly told me that she'd cut my nuts off if I let anything to do with her and Sloane affect our writing process."
Matt looked up from his notebook and raised his eyebrows. "So you're back on the sauce? Was she serious man?"
Brian handed Zacky his beer and sat down. Zacky gave him a nod of thanks and took a sip before he responded to Matt. "I don't know but I'm not going to risk it. It wasn't that long ago that she gave birth so it's not like she needs a whole lot of incentive to castrate me."
"Ouch," Brian winced in sympathy and took a convulsive swallow of his beer. Matt, Johnny and Brooks all cringed and reached for their drinks. Zacky couldn't blame them, he was fond of his balls.
"Jesus, I don't know how you managed to find yourself a woman who is simultaneously cool as fuck and terrifying. And she's my sister-in-law," Matt reflected.
"I'd just like to point out that my wife bought me a boat and the only things she does to my nuts are good things," Brooks pointed out with a small smile. Damn, the dude was so fucking cool, Zacky wanted to be just like him when he grew up.
"And I introduced my wife to Thor and my balls have never been happier," Johnny interjected with a smirk and a salute of his wine glass.
"Oi, asshole. I like your wife, is sharing that shit absolutely necessary?" Zacky frowned at Johnny and flicked his bottle cap at him as Matt tossed a balled up piece of paper and Brian threw a guitar pick in the same direction. Johnny just grinned in the face of their assault.
"Hello?" a soft voice called down the stairs. Along with the sound of approaching footsteps came the scent of pizza. Laine appeared in the doorway with two pizza boxes. Ever the gentleman Brooks jumped up and took them from her. "I've been instructed by your wives that you need to line your stomachs. Apparently the empties accumulate at a rapid pace when you're working down here."
"Thanks Laine," Zacky smiled at her. Damn it was crazy how much like Elliot she looked. He wished that it had been easier back then to take and save photos. Of them all Elliot had been the only one who had regularly carried a camera. Kids these days with their camera phones had no idea how easy it was to take and save photos as opposed to when he was a teenager. They didn't have a clue how good they had it. Shit, he was a heartbeat away from shouting at them to get off his lawn.
Laine seemed to be a nice kid, quiet but nice. It was strange although she was quiet she didn't seem shy just...self-contained, that was it. It shouldn't have been surprising, her mother had been the same except when she and Brian had been raging at and tormenting each other. Still there was something about her, her mannerisms or something, that wasn't entirely Elliot but still tugged at his memory. When he'd asked Brian about it he'd not noticed anything. Maybe it was a Haner thing - although Elliot hadn't been a Haner – maybe genetics had supplied Laine with some mannerism that belonged to Brian's family that Elliot had never shared.
"Thanks Laine," Brian was gesturing to a seat, "Do you want to join us? Maybe get some first-hand insight into the process of writing and recording an album?"
It was interesting to see Brian so awkward. As his friend, Zacky knew that the guy was one of the best friends you could ever have but to say that Brian gave a lot away emotionally to strangers would be wrong. He was generous with his time but not his emotions. It was one of the reasons Zacky had initially had an issue with Brian bringing Steph around, Brian had lots of friends but few made into the inner circle. Zacky had felt it was disrespectful of Brian to introduce a hook-up while he was in the middle of a divorce from the woman who was not only family but a long-time friend. When Zacky had realised exactly who Steph was it had set the alarm bells ringing even louder. Zacky had worried that Brian hooking up with Steph would have detrimentally affected his, at the time only platonic, friendship with Kelly. It hadn't taken long to realise that for what might have been the first time in forever Brian had attempted to open himself up to Steph almost immediately. It seemed as though Brian was trying to let Laine in as well.
Laine glanced around the room her gaze pausing briefly on each of them before she said, "Thanks for the offer but I have stuff to do upstairs."
"Like what?" Brian asked and Zacky wanted to smack the overly confident smirk off his face, that was not the way to get this girl to trust them. "I know that Matt's boys are at school and my kid is with Michelle. I'm almost positive that Sloane is sleeping like the tiny angel she is after keeping her parents awake all night like a tiny demon which means that Kelly is also asleep. And you can't even pretend that Caitie isn't either napping or holed up in her craft room sketching. What's stopping you?"
With a blank look that would have done Brian himself proud Laine said, "Caitie is sketching but only because I told her that I'd take care of the laundry." With a nod in Matt's direction she turned on her heel and disappeared up the stairs.
"Fuck Syn," Matt groaned, "Do you need to be so confrontational when we're trying to get to know her?"
"Well if Elliot hadn't dropped the lot of us we'd already know Laine," Brian said with a hint of petulance. Oh yeah, there it was, just a hint of the great Brian and Elliot rivalry from way back when.
"Bullshit Brian! You can't blame Laine for whatever it was that upset Elliot all those years back!" Johnny snapped and Zacky wasn't sure if it was a new high or a new low in their friendship when Johnny had suddenly become the voice of reason. The ring of red wine around his mouth somewhat diminished his authority. Apparently Brian, Matt and Brooks were similarly stunned by the reasonableness of Johnny's statement because they all just sat looking at him in open mouthed awe.
Eventually it was Brooks who spoke up. "Do you have any idea why Elliot lost touch with you all? Who was the last of you all to speak with her? You said she and Jimmy were close, was it him?"
Zacky turned to look at Brian and out the corner of his eye he could see Matt and Johnny do tha same thing.
Brian cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably. "No, it was me." Brooks wasn't an idiot, Zacky could see him rapidly running through everything he knew about Brian and Elliot's tumultuous relationship in his head.
"Oh," Brooks said and there was a world of meaning in that one word.
"Oh come on man!" Brian protested and if you didn't know him you'd never even have noticed the hint of guilt in the lines pinching around his eyes. "I didn't say anything bad." Brian glanced aroud at his friends knowing that this was the first time they'd ever discussed the last time he'd spoken with Elliot. "Her parents called my dad and after they spoke Elliot wanted to talk to me. She asked about Jimmy. You know how upset he was after she left...I didn't want her to worry about him." Zacky could see that Brian was serious but at times Brian wasn't the most self-aware one among their friend group. Zacky was almost certain that whatever Brian had told Elliot he believed was for her, and Jimmy's own good, but he wasn't as certain that Brian's jealousy of their friendship hadn't coloured his perceptions.
"What did you tell her?" Matt asked with a frown. Johnny was watching avidly but in a rare display of tact he was sipping his wine and keeping his opinion to himself.
"Nothing!" Brian couldn't keep the defensive note out of his voice. "Only that we were all partying on like usual, working on our music, that I was considering dating Michelle and that Jimmy was getting close with that chick Ashley who was a friend of the Berrys."
As one everyone but Brooks groaned. As far as Zacky was concerned the only reason Brooks hadn't groaned was because he didn't realise how big a conversational bomb Brian had lobbed in Elliot's direction.
Brooks frowned, "That was it? She never contacted you guys again? She didn't respond when you tried to contact her?"
Zacky wished that was all. "No, even though that's basically it, there's a bit more. We didn't contact her."
"Why?" Brooks had every right to be confused.
"I was a fucking kid but even I remember what happened," Johnny spoke up. "I don't know about everyone else but I didn't expect to hear from Elliot until she came back from England. It was back before Facebook and not everyone had email or even affordable access to international phone calls, so that wasn't unusual, it's not like any of us were big letter writers. But what I do remember was what happened when we heard she was back. Jimmy was stoked, thinking that she'd be back to see us any day." He turned to Brian and frowned. "For the record Jimmy never dated that Ashley girl, I don't even know why Brian would have said that!"
"I thought he liked her okay?" Brian's objection lacked commitment.
"So I still don't understand what happened," Brooks was confused.
It was Zacky's turn to speak up, "Next thing we heard was that she'd come home with a kid. Laine. She'd had a kid with some English guy. Jimmy kind of lost it. We were all partying hard at that stage but he went at it like it was his job. I mean he'd always partied hard but by that stage there'd been plenty of girls hanging around and Jimmy had avoided them all up until that point. After he heard about Laine? All bets were off." It didn't need to be said that their loyalty was to Jimmy, if he didn't want to contact Elliot none of them would either.
"Okay, I think I get it now," Brooks was thoughtful.
"Yeah, I think I'm finally starting to get it as well," Matt agreed. Zacky was with Matt but the tension in Brian's jaw kept him from saying anything. They all sat in silence contemplating a million different scenarios for what might have gone through both Elliot and Jimmy's minds.
"Come on Matt, I didn't do anything," Brian finally said. It wasn't up to Zacky to point out that it sounded like he felt as though he had.
"Maybe they had an arrangement," Matt fidgeted with his pen.
Brian raised an eyebrow, "No one has an arrangement at eighteen."
Matt scribbled down a couple of lines on his notebook – great it looked like Brian's fuckup when it came to Elliot and Jimmy was going to become a song – before he said, "Some people do."
"You don't marry the person you date at eighteen," Brian argued.
"You married Michelle," Johnny pointed out.
"First we didn't date when I was eighteen, we only hooked up a couple of times and secondly, look how well that worked out." Brian drained his beer bottle.
"Val and I were younger than that when we got together," Matt stated and Zacky felt everything that he left unsaid. The only reason that Val and Matt were no longer together was because she'd died. Matt was blissfully happy with Caitie but no one doubted just how real his feelings for Val had been.
Brian looked abashed, "Sorry."
The twist of Matt's lips showed that Brian was forgiven.
Brian looked troubled. "Surely what I said wasn't the trigger to fuck everything up between Jimmy and Elliot? There had to be more to it than that right? Right?"
Zacky wasn't so sure but Brian seemed genuinely troubled by the idea so when everyone rushed to reassure him Zacky didn't hesitate to join in.
Still everyone knew how incendiary teenage emotions could be. Zacky wasn't entirely convinced that Brian hadn't lit the match that had blown Jimmy and Elliot's, and by association the entire group's friendship with her to shreds.