| Selin~POV |
Dedicated @Amani55555
"You signed up for this," in a deep voice he answers.
I saunter toward him, upon hearing his words.
" Why don't you just disappear if you don't like it". he groans, clearly displaying dislikeness.
That didn't stop me from getting closer to him.
The moment my hand begins to reach toward his face, he starts to fade. I panicked seeing him fading so soon.
Disappearing.
I double over in laughter from the beautiful illusion I created for myself about him.
These days with Saama out of the picture he is coming more and more in my thoughts and dreams. He is so much in my thoughts that sometimes I can feel him and I can smell his musky manly scent grasping me. Whenever I see him, my urge to hold him grows stronger.
But I can't do that and if I do he will take ten steps back from my one step toward him. I can't do anything but to gaze him from afar. And that's what I do, I long for him from afar. Restraining my heart to limits. I think of him. I let my mind to do at least in my mind I am free.
A rough knock on the bathroom door halts my supposed action when a boorish voice orders me to come out.
I hurriedly dress up into my training uniform, wearing a black T-shirt, the center dominated by a logo of Special Service Group which is a silver sword and golden thunder accompanying on either side. Tucking my black shirt into greenish brown combat pant, once satisfied I started to fix my hair into a neat low bun, cleaning the blood from the surrounding area.
Giving myself a quick glance, I look immaculate.
Turning on my feet, I run out of the toilet in my beige commando boots.
The sun setting low in the mountains, sucking away the light from the sky. The darkness blanketing the once clear blue sky. Concealing the fact that the devil is lurking around them, unbeknownst who is hiding their true faces. Darkness may conceal one's face but not their true self. And that's what I hate about darkness because it is when my true inner bloodthirsty devil awakens that is hard to satiate.
It taunts me because I can't do it.
It's agitating when you feel helpless about it.
Darkness is what I run away from but it always comes back, displaying all my inner faces.
Running toward the survival range I could feel the frosty wind, sweeping from the ice-covered sloppy mountains. Filling my lungs with balmy air, its refreshing and sweet. And yet, it doesn't soothe the shriveling fear that is slithering my heart.
By the time I made it to the range, I could feel the tip of my nose numb from the cold. On the vast training ground, the members have started a bonfire and surrounded it with dead trees trunk as a seat. The fire crackling and fracking and dancing to the tunes of the wind.
Taking my seat, my obsessed eyes scanning for the person of my undivided attention. Glancing around restlessly to seek a glance of him before anyone else does. He is nowhere to be seen. The sun to my darkness. The light to my life. The therapist to my brokenness. The silencer to my random thoughts. The snatcher of my fears.
Sensing a company to my right, I shifted my body to the left to form some distance. I look at the person in a disinterested manner with a single eyebrow raised in an annoying way.
"Who are you looking for so desperately? " he questions sleekly.
Turning around and staring at him in the eyes, I offer.
"Looking for your father to teach you some manners".
Giving a contemptuous smile, making him uncomfortable to the extent that he gets up and whisper the word bitch for only my ears to be graced by. In reply, I give him the same scornful look and showing him the middle finger.
His ears turn red from anger and walk away, leaving me laughing to myself.
The hair at the back of my neck rises when I feel Zaabit presence. I turn around, getting up while looking at him.
His black eyes, that were once filled with shine are now dull. His appearance has totally changed, the once slender man is now buffed up. His nose had seen better days. I could see new scars which once didn't exist on his handsome face, especially the scar on his chin. His once short hair is now in sleek shoulder length ponytail. All the boyish look withered away.
A fine strong looking man has emerged. My eyes enthralled by his dignified demeanor. I can finally mark him as mine. Listening to him talk so smoothly and quizing us on the previous topics he becomes quiet for awhile and then continues again shortly by saying.
" For a team to work, you have to be comfortable with each other ...knowing each other strength and weaknesses will help you achieve that, knowing from today task I felt like there is a block of ice within you guys that haven't thawed. You have to warm up to eachother, not killing eachother with the gaze you are giving. We are gonna have days where you will need each other because that is all you have. You have to become each other's family" he breathes out, making us nod our head in alignment.
"Selin."
I smile inwardly as Zaabit calls me casually.
"What would you have become if not a soldier, " he questions.
With a dead face, I look up and reply.
" A serial killer."
Finding him stunned, I fortune him with a smile.
He comes closer as I watch him raise his hand to hit me but I don't give him a chance as I bend down to pretend like I am fixing my boots. I sit up straight, noticing his eyes fix on my every movement. Hearing the members whispering about how I embarrassed him I whished I had let him hit me. He has hit all the members in a friendly manner except for me. He always stiffens when I appear in front of him.
He clears his throat, narrowing his eyes at me he speaks
"All jokes aside, what made you become a soldier? "
In a monotonous bland voice, I pronounce a series of consistent words in one sentence "serial killer, murder, manslaughter, killer, mutilater, cannibalistic and do you want me to continue."
Staring with unwavering expression, looking at nothing but him. The chilly air silencing as I see conflicting emotion rising in his eyes.
"Why come here if you wanted to become that" he exclaims.
A rush of happiness waves in my heart as we are finally having one on one talk. Having him all to myself. His attention that I have been craving for the past week. I felt rejected but now it doesn't seem like. He is finally talking like he wants to rather than doing his job.
Oh, Zaabit.
Do you know what happiness feels like...this is happiness. When the man you want finally acknowledges you.
"Why have you, Selin."
Snapping me out.
"It's because of you," I declare.
Hi Guysss!!!!! I am sure you guys are doing ur best...Hopefully the next chapter is from Zaabit POV...the story is just starting off and the further chapters are gonna expose y she is like this and how she met zaabit and all....
So Please do stay with me as it will encourages me to work on it...
so I hope u like this chapter and ur thoughts would be gladly appreciated.
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Be happy!!!