Chapter Fifteen
“Carly Ann, will you be my girlfriend?”
I stared at Aiden like a fumbling idiot, not blinking and certainly not saying anything, hell; I don’t think I was even breathing.
“Umm,” I fumbled and his bright blue eyes dimmed slightly. The flowers that he held in his hands lowered to his side and he breathed in. “I mean, um, we only went on one date? Are you sure?”
Are you sure? Seriously, Carly?
Aiden gave a strained laugh. “I’m pretty sure,” he stepped closer to me so our toes touched. He managed a small smile. “I really like you, Carly Ann.”
I swallowed. “I like you too,” do I? “I just–isn’t this a little fast?”
He wobbled back and forth on his heels. “Not really?”
Great, neither one of us can give a sure answer.
“Umm,” I mumbled again. Aiden’s expression got dimmer and dimmer. “Can you give me time to decide?”
Time to decide? He’s not asking you to marry him, make up you damn mind! Yes or no. Simple.
It doesn’t feel simple.
Aiden brightened slightly and he bobbed his head rapidly. “Of course,” He shoved the flowers in my arms and smiled softly. “I’ll meet you at your locker at the end of the day and I’ll leave you only for the rest of the day so you can decide.”
He bent and kissed my cheek softly, his lips lingering for a little longer than a second. “See you soon.”
He was gone in a second, waving behind his back.
I collapsed on my locker with the stupid roses staring up at me with their stupid prettiness and racked a hand through my hair. That was totally not what I expected when I showed up this morning. Aiden had cornered me at my locker and waited before the halls were empty to ask me that question and shove his stupidly pretty flowers in my face.
All I wanted to do today was hopefully get back and into a normal routine and I also had plans to patch things up with Cherry, mostly so I could have her as a backup if Aiden went south and I didn’t have to seem pathetic and cling off of Noah all senior year.
This, this question from Aiden, this I was not expecting.
And too be honest, I have absolutely no idea what my answer is. Sure, Aiden’s a decent guy, but do I really want to be dating him? And, I think I was right when I said this is a bit fast. I mean, in the movies they at least go on a couple dates before taking that leap to couple’s town. Also, why would a guy like Aiden be interested in dating me? A date was shocking enough but to actually be boyfriend and girlfriend, that’s just plain weird. Something deep inside of me wanted to believe that maybe he really did just like me but that seems just too farfetched.
Aiden is supposed to date girls like Brittany Shaw, not geeks like me. And maybe I’m being a bit too old fashioned and stereotypical but I just can’t seem to wrap my head around it. I’m not exactly a complete social reject either; I mostly just keep to myself and don’t talk. I’m not one of those geeks that where unicorn sweaters and have my cat as my phone screen saver. Also, I certainty ain’t some super genius. I do alright in English and I’m passing Chemistry with a B- on the best of days so I’m not exactly a keener nor am I a flunker.
I’m just ordinary, mundane Carly Ann Summers.
I managed to somehow stuff the flowers in my locker and make my way to English on time, despite my state of shock. Before I knew it I was sitting in my regular seat in Mr. James class and trying my hardest not to fall asleep. We ran out of coffee this morning so I was forced to suffer through some orange juice that helped nothing to wake me up. Noah had stayed late after we got back to Brooklyn, watching old Disney movies and blasting Disney tunes from his iPod. I finally shoved him out the door at quarter to twelve when I told him Becky was going to be home in fifteen minutes and she’d skin him alive if she saw him in our apartment.
I looked to my side to see Noah with his head on his desk, his blue eyes shut and his blonde curls framing his face like a halo. I poked his side with my pencil. “Noah, wake up,”
Noah mumbled something incoherent and shifted away from me. I rolled my eyes and turned to the front. Mr. James hadn’t showed up yet and he was already ten minutes late. Not that I’m surprised, Mr. James starts class when he wants to start class.
I needed to talk to Noah about Aiden asking me to be his girlfriend, mostly because I wanted his advice. I have absolutely no clue what I’m doing. Like, is this too early? Should I say no? Should I say yes? Do I even like him?
Brittany Shaw sauntered her way into the room five minutes before Mr. James did. She walked over towards Noah and me with a bright smile, showing off her pearly white teeth.
“Hi, Carly Ann,” she perked and rested her hands on my desk so she could gaze down at me. “Aiden’s been looking for you all morning,” she gave me a knowing wink.
Noah’s head snapped up. He narrowed his blue eyes at us and his lips slipped into a thin line. My brows furrowed at his expression. It was one of those rare times that I’ve seen Noah with an unpleasant expression.
I turned back to Brittany. “Oh yeah? Did he say what he wants?”
I swallowed softly on the inside. Hopefully, he hadn’t gone blabbing to everyone that he was going ask me out then I’m the idiot that said I need to ‘think about it.’
Brittany’s smile widened. “No, but he seemed really desperate to find you. Your date must’ve gone splendidly.”
Splendid? Did she just say splendid? Who the heck says splendid anymore?
I shifted uncomfortable. “Umm…”
Thankfully, Mr. James bustled his way into the classroom in a flurry of papers and a crazy long scarf. Brittany stared at Mr. James with distaste before strutting to her seat.
“Oh Captain, my Captain.” Mr. James slammed his books down on the desk and swung his over extravagant scarf to the side. He narrowed his intelligent eyes on us and expected us like some strange specimen. He perched himself on his cluttered desk and rested his elbows on his pants.
“A poem by Walt Wittmen and also commonly know from the outstandingly genius and by far the best movie of this generation—”
“The Dead Poets Society.” It took me a moment to realize that it was me who blurted out the words with an unconcealed amount of passion that could only be described as nerdy. I flushed a red and let my long curls cover my face in a curtain.
Even my hair couldn’t hide the face splitting smile Mr. James sent my way. “Yes, Carly, the Dead Poets Society.” He turned to the rest of the class and leaned back, his eyes gaining that crazy passionate look to them again. “A movie that touches the harsh and unfair realities of this world but also dips into the passion which makes many of us gather the courage to crawl out of bed every day. It expands and delves into poetry so rich it pours words of wisdom but also touches on sadness and depression. It’s a movie that’s beautiful and realistic and does not have a happy ending but does have a ending which makes you want to irrevocable believe in people and poetry and all the beautifully simplest things in life.”
I found myself nodding at Mr. James every word and letting them sink deep inside my bones.
God, I love this man…
In a strictly professional way.
Mr. James jumped up from the desk and swiveled his way to his desk, knocking half his papers of and sending them spiraling across the room. He didn’t seem to mind. He lifted up a movie case and waved it back and forth so rapidly none of us had any hope of reading it. “And yes, we are of course going to be watching this wonderful work of genius placed in movie form.”
Then, he popped the movie in and yelled at someone to shut the lights so we can see this great masterpiece in the proper movie lighting before hitting play.
“Noah,” I whispered. I poked him in the side with my pencil again. He had fallen back asleep on the desk; I guess if it doesn’t involve talking mice and cartoon characters, he isn’t interested.
“Noah,” I poked him harder, watching as the pencil traveled under his t-shirt and his minimal arm fat with a somewhat sadistic, yet satisfied grin.
He yelped and shot his head up, his blue eyes glaring down at me. “What?” he snapped. I think he was trying to be intimidating but his messy blonde curls and sleepy eyes just made him more adorable.
“I need to talk to you,” I whispered, sneaking a glance at Mr. James. He was too entranced with the movie to care what was going on with us. I would be too if I wasn’t so stressed about the Aiden thing and plus, I’ve already seen the movie around seven times, not that it could ever get boring.
His brows furrowed in confusion. “You are talking to me,” he whispered back, staring at me as if I hit my head and knocked some sense out.
I scowled. “Really? I thought I was mind communicating with you.”
Okay, stress might make me slightly more b!tchy than normal.
Noah grinned at my irritation.
I leaned forward. “I’m going to the bathroom, meet me in the hall in exactly five minutes. Mr. James is too into the movie to even think straight, he’ll let you go.”
His lips dipped into a frown but he nodded, trusting me. “Okay.”
I excused myself and waited in the hall for exactly seven minutes and twenty two seconds before I saw Noah sauntering his way towards me.
He stopped in front of me and folded his arms. “Okay, what’s this about?”
“Aiden asked me to be his girlfriend!” I blurted.
Noah’s jaw dropped open. Literally flew open like some gobsmacked fool. His blue eyes grew wider and wider as he stared at me in shock. His expression changed slowly and he closed his mouth, his eyes sliding back to regular only slightly less emotional. Actually, he hardly carried any emotion at all.
“What did you say?” was the first thing he managed, his body tense and rigid. I didn’t answer. “Carly, what did you say?”
Shit, Carly. No, Carly Ann and no Wendy. Just Carly. Crap, he’s mad.
“I haven’t given him an answer yet.”
His eyes narrowed further. “What is your answer?”
I squirmed under his unyielding gaze. “I don’t know.”
He stepped closer to me. “You’re going to say no.”
It wasn’t a question. It was a statement. And for some reason, that made me angry, irrationally angry.
“It’s my decision, Noah.” My voice was calm but my fists were clenched at my sides.
He glared down at me and I found myself flinching. I hated this look. I hated seeing him like this. “Not if you’re going to make the wrong one. Aiden only wants one thing. Don’t be stupid, Carly.”
I grit my teeth. “I’m not being stupid—”
Noah cut me off. He grabbed me by the shoulders and lowered his head so we’re eye to eye. “You are being stupid if you think for a second you’re going to be something special to Aiden Kelly.” He scoffed as if the idea itself was ridiculous. “As soon as he gets what he wants, he’ll dump you quicker than it took him to get you.”
I swallowed and shoved his hands off me. “And what is that, Noah? What is it he wants?”
Noah glared at me. “Don’t act coy.”
“No, Noah, tell me what the only thing Aiden Kelly wants from me.”
He stepped closer and his eyes turned darker. “Sex, Carly. The only thing he wants from any girl.”
“Oh,” I gave a dry laugh. “So, as soon as I give that to him and of course I will, because I’m just a big ole slut, you’re saying he’ll dump me?”
Noah gritted his teeth. “I never called you a slut.”
“No, you just called me stupid and implied that I’m a slut.”
His fists clenched at his sides. “I never said that! Stop putting words in my mouth! I’m just trying to protect you, Carly. That’s it. You’re too naïve to understand that boys like Aiden don’t go out with girls like you.”
“Girls like me?” I visibly flinched. My voice sounded weak, the hurt oozing out like an open flesh wound. I hated it. Hated that Noah made me feel like this, the boy who promised he would make everything better.
I had already decided that it was too good to be true that Aiden wanted to go out with a girl like me but hearing it from Noah hurt all the more.
“Wendy,” Noah murmured, stepping close to me and reaching a hand out. I jerked back and he let his hand fall.
“I know I’m not a Brittany Shaw or anything but I thought maybe it couldn’t hurt to think that a guy like Aiden Kelly would actually be interested in a girl like me.”
“Wendy,” he murmured again, his face twisting as if in pain. “I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Then what did you mean it like, Noah? Cause I can only find one meaning from those words and I think it’s pretty straight forward.” My voice had risen to a hoarse shout. Noah opened his mouth but I held up a hand. “You know what, I don’t even care. I shouldn’t have asked you out here.”
Noah clenched his jaw again, the anger reappearing in his eyes. “So what? You were just going to decide on your own and tell me tomorrow ‘surprise, Aiden and I are dating!’ ”
I practically growled. “Stop putting words in my mouth! I already told you I haven’t decided yet so no, I wasn’t going to do that. I asked you out here so you could give me your honest opinion. Because I trust and appreciate you and whatever you have to say besides when you act like an irrational prick, like you are now! Two days ago you wanted to talk about what it was like to kiss Aiden Kelly and now you’re blowing up because he actually asked me out? What happened?”
“Nothing,” he murmured. “Apparently absolutely nothing happened.”
I ripped my hands through my hair in frustration and screeched. “Stop talking in riddles and give me a God damm straight answer!”
Noah’s jaw tightened and he stepped closer to me again. “My answer is that you’re acting childish and stupid and not thinking clearly. Aiden Kelly is not your boy next door kind of type; he’s manipulative and he will use you. You need to open your eyes and see it for yourself because I’m not going to be here for when what I tell you comes true.”
“I’m leaving; I shouldn’t have asked you out here in the first place.”
I turned on my heel, getting ready to storm out of there when Noah’s words stopped me cold.
“If you say yes to him, I’m done. He’s only going to break your heart and I don’t want to be around for when it happens.” Noah’s voice was cold and it reminded me of when he talked about his sister’s health; detached, emotionless.
I squared my shoulders and didn’t turn around. “Then I guess we’re done.”
A/N: First day of high school was today, cry. My updates might slow a bit but I'll try to get them out as much as possible. By the way, The Dead Poets Society wasn’t featured in this book because of the recent passing of Robin Williams and only because I thought it would relate to some major themes in this story and it has been and always will be my favorite movie.