Chapter Four
It was two years ago when my life was destroyed before my eyes. I was married and happy. Utterly and blindingly happy. I was naive to all the world, and rejoiced in it. I laughed and smiled everyday. I was young and inexperience about the world. At that time, I did not care one bit. I thought that there was good in everyone. How naive I was!
It was when my husband and I were on a trip into Virginia that my world of stupid bliss ended. How could a simple trip we had done many times change my life so horribly and profoundly? We were just driving along enjoying being together. There was a lot of traffic for a Tuesday, but we did not think anything of it. Just the normal traffic outside DC.
I was staring out the window thinking that it was a beautiful day when a truck veered right into my side of the vehicle. It was going far too fast for all of this traffic. My body easily moved and I felt pain along my right side from the impact. Everything was happening so fast that fear was all I could comprehend. All that I knew at the time was of fear.
The truck forced us into three other cars. Soon our car was tumbling over and over sideways down the interstate. I felt so weightless the whole time. When our car final stopped, I was unconscious. The moment I came to, I was aware that voices were screaming and shouting. I was upside down with my arms hanging down to the roof of the car. People were trying to scramble to all the vehicles involved in the accident, including ours.
I moved my head over to my husband. My vision was blurry, but I could make him out. He was laboring for air worse than I was. He was covered with blood that was pouring down from him as he hung where his seatbelt held him. Slowly his laboring grew still and his eyes grew empty as he died. I tried to scream and shout at him not to leave me, but I had no voice. I could not move. I had broken almost every bone in my body. I was slipping away from the scene again when the ambulances had shown up. I never felt the struggle they had removing me from the car.
The next time I woke was in a hospital. I was aware of two things. First would be that I could feel the most horrendous pain ever throughout my body. The pain was everywhere with no end. Second would be the most intense numbing sensation throughout my body that tried to mask the pain, but failed. It was like being hypersensitive and feeling nothing at all at the same time.
The doctors would come into my room periodically and would remark about my condition. Most gave me three days to live. I had overheard that I had several lacerations on many of my vital organs. I would have surely died on an operation table if they tried to fix them all. So they let me die slowly. Painfully slow because they thought I was not conscious to any pain. There was no way for me to tell them they were wrong.
The second day was when a new doctor came into my room with one of the many doctors that have looked in on me. They looked over my chart and discussed transferring me to another hospital. People there specialized in lost causes such as mine. I had a bad feeling about that place, but I could not say anything.
~
"Her vitals are starting to fail. If we don't admit her now, she will surely die. She is perfect for the experimental treatment we have created." The new doctor was telling my current urgent care doctor. He really wanted me. I was a lost cause. Just let me die already.
"Its not my call. You need to get permission from her family."
I heard the rustle of papers. "We already have their permission. Now please step aside. You have done your best up until now. Let us help her the rest of the way."
I heard the huff of resignation. "I will get the paperwork started then." My doctor left my room.
The new doctor walked forward. I felt him close to me as I laid on the hospital bed. "Welcome to your new life my dear. Lets just see what you will become for us." I felt a stick of something in my arm, and then the world was gone from me again.
The next time I knew what was going on was when I felt like someone was moving me. My body moved restrained on what I would guess was an ambulance girny. "Is this the new subject you had talked about?" A new voice. He seemed skeptical of me. His voice was empty of anything resembling emotions.
"Yes. You should look at her chart. She is far more perfect than the others. We are lucky that she was in a car accident and near death." The new doctor from the hospital. Perfect? For what? He sounded too happy to have me near death.
Slowly I was lifting up off my body. This feeling was odd. I looked at my hands. They were glowing with a light from under my skin. Was I a ghost? I twisted around and saw myself laying on an ambulance stretcher. I looked horrible! Man, totally and completely messed up!
My hair was dirty and nasty looking, not to mention a greasy rat's nest. My face was bruised and battered. Cuts and gashes were everywhere on my body. The beauty I was had turned into a lump of bumped and bruised deformed girl. I was a stranger from a horror flick. A zombie about to raise or something like that. No one could ever recognize me like this. I even had just a sheet on me, covering my naked body up. Thankfully the sheet was very solid.
I saw a line of light that flowed between of my two hearts. The bruised and battered body's heart to the glowing spiritual heart. That must be my connection to being alive. If that were to break, I would be died.
"Docs? She starting to crash." I looked at the light from my hearts. It was fading slowly. Oh heavens! I was dying. I didn't know if I wanted to or not. Did I want to die? Why did I feel like panicking then?
"Lets get her inside then and get started with the injections." The skeptical doctor informed the MT. I had to hold onto the stretcher as the MT started to wheel me into this old style hospital. No one could see me. I was a ghost after all. Looks more like a mental institute instead of a real hospital.
They wheeled my bruised body into a simple room with tiles all over the walls and floor. Looks more like a room for butchering people than saving them. They just position the stretcher in the middle of the room below the only light. I looked over to the skeptical doctor who was next to a table on the wall with the door where ten syringes filled with a strange liquid rested. It was a substance made up of swirls of red and white. The white seemed to shimmer and glow on its own. The red looked to be like strange blood, but deeper in color. More of a burgundy red too.
I looked at my heart monitor that was on the gurney. I was most likely seconds away from dying. Quickly the skeptical doctor picked up one of the ten syringes and sank it deep into my heart. He passed right through my spiritual shoulder to do so. I just misted and then came back together. The light that linked my hearts seemed to strengthen immediately and the glow from my hands did the same as he emptied the syringe into my heart. The world seemed to pound and move with my heart beat now.
I watched as he was quickly handed each syringe by the other doctor. He put the liquid into nine other points on my body. One of my temples. My neck near the jugular. The top of both of my arms. Both thighs. Both calves. Finally into my abdomen just below my belly button. He managed to keep me covered the whole time while he moved the sheet away from my body.
I could really feel my heart now. I did not have to look at the monitor, though I did hear it. My heart was gaining strength because of that serum. But I was not going back into my body. I was still floating above it becoming brighter and brighter. I watched as my bruised and battered body started to heal right before my eyes. Too quickly to be normal. The MT was started unhooking everything from my body, and moving it out of the room. Why?
With everything unhooked and away from me, everyone left the room. They left me to lay on the gurney all alone. The light dimmed after I was alone. I stared at my now healed body. Slowly the injection sights were glowing and that glow was spreading down my body. Once my whole body was glowing, I felt a snap and I was opening my eyes with a gasp. I was alive!
That happy moment did not last long as an incredible pain rippled through my body. I could feel every cell. Every molecule shifting and changing. My nails felt like something as prying each one out and shoving something else into its place. My back felt like something was about to claw and explode out from it. All my muscles were tight and constricted. My eyes were the worst. How could I describe that pain? I tried to open them again, but the minimal light in the room felt like a thousand suns. They also burned like a thousand suns were on them even closed. My scalp burned and seared as if something was pulling itself through the skin. Like the sting of jelly fish testicles being pulled off ones skin. One by one.
I wretched myself to the floor with a loud painful thud, screaming the whole time though I could not hear my voice. My back hurt too much for me to remain on the ambulance gurney. I got to my hands and knees and just curled up into a ball as the pain spiked to a new high. I screamed and wither in that pain. What was time with this pain? It meant nothing to me now.
Slowly that pain ended in all but my back. Now all the pain seemed to pool there. I took my hands and used my nails to create thin cuts in my back where the pain was the worst. Right near my shoulder blades. I needed to get whatever was in there out and make the pain go away.
Suddenly whatever wanted to come out of my back did and the pain ended. I spread out along the floor, thanking whoever everyone prayed to, for ending all my pain. The floor felt so nice being cold against my naked skin. My skin felt a bit hot and needed to cool down. My skin was fire incarnate. Like every cell was a tiny bulb of light and all of them were on at the same time. The floor acted like a light switch turning off the light bulbs for me.
As some time passed, the exhaustion of what happened faded. My eyes opened with no more pain. I lifted up from the floor and froze part of the way up. My hair had fallen into my view. It was WHITE! Not to mention long now. It pooled around my hands that were on the floor. I had shoulder length hair before, now it was floor length by the look of it. I always wanted long white hair, but to get it was strange.
Then I saw a feather on the floor. A beautiful white feather. I picked it up and sat back onto my heels. I stared at it. I twirled it in my fingers admiring how it looked in the low light. It was the most beautiful feather I had every seen. Gold and silver seemed to shine when the light hit it at points. This must be from something rare. Something remarkable.
The door to the room opened and I scrambled to the farthest corner away from it. I was surprised when white wings wrapped around me. The feather was from ME! I instinctual used the wings to cover up my naked body. I will have to deal with the fact I had wings later. Staying covered up was more important.
Both the doctors came into the room. The skeptical one was much older than the one who brought me here. His face was full of wrinkles and he had white hair from age. His eyes were black and he wore glassed that were dignified. He reminded me so much of a male version of my grandmother. He eyed me like I was a science experiment, which I was.
The other doctor seemed to be in awe over me. His jaw seemed to be forced closed. He looked to be in his mid thirties with the start of a salt and pepper hair coloring. He stood just a tiny bit taller than the skeptical doctor. He also did not look as dignified as the sceptically doctor.
The younger doctor stepped forward and took the sheet that was on the stretcher. The gurney had been pushed closer to the door. That must have happened when I fell to the floor. "Its alright my dear. No one will hurt you." The younger doctor looked at me in a reassuring way.
"Toss the sheet please." My voice was timid but beautiful. Oh so beautiful. Sort of like I was singing though I was just speaking. I covered up my mouth partially with one of my wings. My voice had shocked me and made me feel very shy.
He tried to walk to me but that made me cringe where I stood. He gave a reluctant smile then tossed the sheet to me. I grimaced when I heard fabric tearing when I grasped the fabric with my hand. The doctors seemed to raise an eyebrow at the sound and give each other a quick glance. I looked at the sheet and saw my nails had made some holes into it. I sighed and wrapped the sheet around my naked body.
I looked down at my hands and they looked normal. Though they seemed a bit longer than usual. "Why did you do this to me?" I looked up at the two doctors.
"We wanted to save you my dear. There are those living that hold great potential. You are one of those few." The younger doctor said stepping a little closer to me. "Though your potential seems to be greater than any other."
I tilted my head to the side. "Explain."
"Well... None of the others changed so dramatically as you. Usually just one trait appears with the healing, but you seemed to have more than one." He walked forward a few more steps. "May I examine you?"
"I don't like hospitals or doctors just so you know." I have always hated doctors. I avoided them as much as possible. Growing up, I was in and out of hospitals till I was twelve. There was always one thing or the other wrong with me.
"I will be gentle." He held out his hand to me. I timidly reached to him and took his hand. I uncovered my body of my wings and stood fully upright. He looked in my eyes as his grew wide. "Your eyes are spectacular. They are icy blue." Something about the way he looked at me and talk to me sounded wrong. I turned my eyes away from him. "You don't have to be shy. Lets get you out of this room."
He led me out as I kept my wings closely around shoulders to protect myself. My hair draped over both of my shoulders as well as down my back over the sheet. My right hand stayed crossed over my chest as the younger doctor held my left hand. Everyone we passed seemed to want to drop to their knees at the sight of me. All their legs seemed to shake slightly. Was I that shocking to see?
The older doctor walked behind us as I was being guided to an elevator at the end of the hall of this first floor. I never looked around as we walked, though I did notice that the floor and walls were also covered with white tiles. I just hung my head still feeling tired and sore.
He took me to the third floor of the hospital. This floor was different from the first. Where there was tile nearly everywhere on the first, there was wood and actual walls on this one. The floor was cherrywood with the wood going up a quarter of the walls here. It felt warmer and homier to me. Not like a hospital at all.
We walked into the third room on the left which had its door open. It did not look like a typical hospital room. The younger doctor helped me to sit on the bed that was in the middle of the room. It was bigger than a twin size bed and had soft cotton sheets. Nothing like the sheet that was draped around my body. There was a flat screen TV on top of a dresser to the right of the bed. A glass and metal desk with a computer to the left. Looks more like a high scale dorm room than one found in a hospital.
The young doctor turned to the older one. "I think she would feel more comfortable if I examined her alone."
"Fine. I will be right outside checking on the others." The older doctor turned and closed the door behind him as he left. The young doctor retrieved a chart that was on the back of the door. He grabbed the chair from the desk and sat in front of me. I stared at the floor the whole time. This was going to be uncomfortable having to be examined by a stranger. Its like having a new primary physician.
"How are you feeling right now?" He sounded very kind, but something inside me was telling me to not be fooled. Not to be naive to him. I was more than an experiment to him. He wanted something else from me.
"Scared, tired, sore, and overwhelmed." I did not want to lie, especially since I am an angel now. Lying was wrong. Especially with a singsong voice.
"It is all new, isn't it?"
"Yes."
He retrieved a tiny flashlight from his doctor's jacket side pocket. "I want to see what reactions your eyes have." He placed the chart on the bed beside me and lifted my chin so he could see my eyes better. He passed the flashlight back and forth in front of my eyes. The light hurt for a moment at its height, but I was able to ignore it. The light had the entire color spectrum including ultravoilet and inferred. I could see so much now. Everything was clearer too. "Remarkable. Your eyes are feline yet you have wings." He let go of me and picked up the chart.
"That hurt a bit. The light. But I was able to ignore the pain."
"Thank you for informing me."
"My grandma always told me to tell a doctor everything."
"Smart grandma."
Next he checked my ears and hearing. I got everything no matter how silent. Then it was on to my reflexes. I nearly kicked him through the wall, but I grabbed him just before he did. I was strong and fast. He tested my nails which kind of broke the device and made no dent in my nails. He tried to cut my hair for a sample, but my hair just dulled and broke the shears.
When he was examining my wings, he was too delicate with them. I would burst into laughs because he tickled me so easily. He slowly realized he could have a firmer hand with them. Each of my wings were six foot long and three feet wide at their height. He could not even pull a feather out when he tried, but I could and did. Just one feather, and another formed in its place.
I yawned after the twentieth test. "Excuse me. I am just getting more tired."
"We can stop for now. I have all we can do in here. Get some rest."
I laid down on the bed and slipped into my first sleep since I became what I am now. I was frightened of why they did this to me. I was also sad that I was alone now in a strange place filled with strange people. Not to mention doctors everywhere. I could hear odd sounds in this place that did not seem to fit the normal hospital sounds. Where there other people who looked different like me? Only time would tell me there was.
~~~~~
I heard Darien sigh and there was the closing of my journal. "That's what happened to her that lead to her being this way." I heard him sigh again. "How could I hope that she would want me if she was happy once?"
I felt Keith patting my hair as he finished with fixing it. "Dear Darien, don't think like that. You have not seen her since she met you. Hello... She even made her gown for the other night just for you."
"She made the dress for me?"
"She wanted to impress you. You have no idea how she feels about you." His voice came from right above my head. It almost sounded like Keith wanted to go tisk tisk to Darien.
"I have a clue how she feels for me if it was really how she feels. Though she may have done it because she thought she was about to sacrifice herself for everyone. She kissed me before she charged that Karl guy."
Keith moved quickly to the foot of my hospital bed. "Karl? Oh damn!" I could hear his voice shake.
"You looked like your about to be sick. Who was Karl?"
"Dude... you really should read more of that journal."
Darien was speechless for a while. He also did not move by the lack of sound from where he sat. Shortly I heard him shift another page in my journal. He was going to continue to read.