The next day at breakfast I skipped again, but this time Malfoy did not follow me, instead it was Fred. While Harry eyed Ginny and Ron dealt with stupid Lavender Brown, Fred laced his hand in mine and lead me out onto the grounds. He took me on a walk on the edge of the forbidden forest.
Casually I say, “George, I thought this stupid rivalry was over.” I take my hand out of his and put them on my hips.
The pretend Fred starts cracking up, “I swear ‘Mione, you should have been our mother. You seem to be the only one able to tell us apart the quickest.”
I roll my eyes, but I smile at this stupid trickery. “Well last night was definitely Fred, so does he know you’re here George?” I kick a few pebbles into the forest as our strides seem to lessen and we walk slower as though hanging onto all the time we could.
“He doesn’t need to know. You know you only chose him because you didn’t want to break Fred and I apart. He was the only one not willing to share you.” He gestures as though this is the only reason I ended it with Fred this summer.
“Me dating both of you would never work George and anyways I’m with Fred now so drop it.”
“It’s ok to be in love with two people Hermione.” He turns around and stands in front of me. I stop walking and think, ‘But am I allowed to be in love with three?’ I look away from George and stare at the castle.
“No George it’s not ok when the person you’re dating will be hurt from it,” I look back at him, and I can see the old hurt from this summer begin to show up in his eyes. “If you cared for your brother, you would leave it be.” I begin to walk away, the grass blurring together with the tears growing in my eyes.
“If you cared about yourself you wouldn’t have leashed yourself to my brother while you were trying to get over Malfoy.” I keep walking trying to hide the small hesitate step I had when he said Draco’s name. George was the only one I ever purposely told about Malfoy. Once I was in the castle I ran to the girls lavatory and screamed and kicked the wall. When did I become so pathetic, able to be reduced to tears so easily. I used to be the unbreakable one out of everyone, but here I am pathetically crying in a girls lavatory. I was so caught up in my thoughts that I hadn’t heard the door open and close, and I felt a hand touch my shoulder.
I spun around pulling my wand out of my pocket and pointing it threateningly at this unwanted guest. It’s Ginny, she raises her hands in a surrender style and backs up a few steps. I lower my wand, “Sorry Ginny you startled me…”
“Obviously…” She lowers her hands when I pocketed my wand again. “So…” She begins awkwardly, “Why are you crying… this time?” I know she’s only trying to be nice and not really acting out of friendship, since she hasn’t really talked to me since last year and it just got worse over the summer.
“It’s complicated..” I struggle so much to continue, that I end up being silent for a few minutes as I stare at the marble floor.
“Not willing to talk to me still? I see how it is.” She turns away in anger and begins to storm out of the lavatory.
“Wait!?” I yell desperately trying to stop her, and she did. She turned back with a hopeful glimmer in her eyes.
“If you sit with me somewhere, I swear I’ll tell you everything, you just need to give me time.” She seems to think about this for a second. She nods her head and gives a hand gestured as to say 'follow me'.
We walk in silence down very empty corridors, it is a Sunday with wonderful weather. Obviously everyone will be outside by the lake for some lounging around on the grounds. She enters the staircase leading up to the astronomy tower, I hesitate at the bottom step but in the end I follow Ginny up. Once I reach the top of the tower I found Ginny sitting in one of the windows and I go to join her. She stares at me at first as I retell my secrets from the last two years, some she already knew. About halfway through she started staring out the window almost like she was so disturbed she couldn’t look at me.
I recount the night of the yule ball all the way up to the walk I just went on with George. After I’ve finish, I feel I’ve bared my soul to someone and it felt good to let someone else know the whole truth. Ginny however says nothing, she sits there in agonizing silence for what seems like forever.
Finally she looks at me, “So you’re in love with three guys and two of them are my twin brothers and the other one is literally all your friends arch nemesis?” I slowly nod my head, feeling a scolding or a row about to begin. She instead surprises me and hugs me so hard we fell out of the window into the tower.
“You’ve gotten yourself into such a sticky situation Hermione.” She giggles as she hugs me so tight I thought I would never be able to breath again. She finally lets go, sits back, and if she was sitting on a chair she would have definitely been on the edge. “So, what are you gonna do?”
“You think if I knew I would have been crying in the lavatory?” I ask giggling, glad to have my best girl friend back in my life. We talked all day up in the astronomy tower until the sun had set and we realized we should probably make our way to dinner and show our friends we’re still alive. We stopped by the common room to grab a few things.
As we were making our way down to the Great Hall, one of the twins found us. “Hiya Fred, you running late like usual?” Ginny asks her brother teasingly as he wraps his arms around my waist. I do not return the lovingly gesture, even if I wanted to I was carrying my ancient runes, muggle studies, and potions textbooks in my arms. I was planning on stopping by the library after dinner to get a few last edits on my essay in potions and study for my other two classes before I went to the Gryffindor tower where I would most likely get distracted. I give the twin a quick look and a half-hearted smile. I noticed that this time it is Fred and not George pretending again.
“Haha very funny little sis, I just wanted to see my girl for a little bit before I headed down to Hogsmeade.” He says this with his innocent tone. I look up at him suspiciously, “Are you running late Fred?” He runs his hand through his hair, which is in fact a nervous tick of his that I found quite adorable this summer. “Would you kill me if I said yes?” I come to a stop and turn to Fred hitting him with my books. “Fred Weasley you go to Hogsmeade this minute.” He backs away rubbing his arm and laughing through the corridor leading outside. He winks at me before he jogs away.
I follow Ginny into the Great Hall, she raises her eyebrow at me. “I’m excited and all to know about your boy trouble, but the longer you take to choose one of them the more they will get hurt.” she whispers in my ear as we make our way to Ron and Harry.
“I did choose, I’m choosing Fred.” I say with as much confidence as I can.
“You may choose him in public and in front of everyone, but do you really choose him with your heart?”
“You sound like you’re in a cheesy love movie.” I mutter and glare at her, even though I knew she was right no matter how much I wanted to deny it.
“A cheesy what?” She looks at me with confusion as she sits down across from Harry and Ron and I sit down next to her.
“Nothing it’s a muggle thing.” I giggle to myself.
I stare off as my friends talked about the soon to start apparition classes. My gaze involuntarily lands on Draco across the Great Hall. He was already looking at me and I sit up a little bit and look to make sure Harry, Ron, and Ginny didn’t see. By the time I looked back Draco was halfway out of the room.
“Umm, I’m gonna go start working on homework for tonight. See you later.” I rush, tripping over the seats and catching my balance, and out of the Hall before they could say anything in response. I stop myself the moment I’m out the Great Hall door and shake my head. ‘What are you playing at Hermione.’ I turn on my heel and head to the library where I’m supposed to be going.
…
I swirl my quill in my hand staring at the shelves of dusty books. I was currently reading my ancient runes spellbook, well I was trying to at least, at a very unsuccessful rate. I began humming a song I heard over the summer unconsciously.
“Shhhhh” I turn around to the hiss expecting to see the librarian and apologize to her.
“I’m so-” I realize it’s only Draco and so I turn back around and pretend like I’ve been focused on my spellbook this whole time and he was only being a pest.
Draco walks around me and sits across from me. “So part-ner, wanna work on the winter solstice dance?” He pulls an apple out of his bag and takes a very huge bite. I raise my eyebrow, “Fine, but let’s go to the room of requirements. I don’t want people thinking we’re good friends.” I close my spellbook and stack my books.
“Hmph, we’re forced head party planners, we’re expected to hang out now.” He says harshly and walks ahead of me. I roll my eyes and storm after him wondering why I ever dated him.
...
‘I giggled but Draco being a quidditch player, he’s much faster and stronger than me, so I was stumbling and tripping after him. We were running from that stupid ghost Peeves, we’re out of bed after curfew and Peeves almost found us. I watch Draco’s platinum hair falling out of it’s perfect, slick back style that he always makes it in. I like it messy much better. He looks over his shoulder with a huge smile on his face and winks at me, causing me to start giggling again. He pulls me between a pillar and the wall and puts his pointer finger across his lips to tell me to be quiet. I pretend to zip my lips and throw away the key making him chuckle with me this time. “My little lion, you’re gonna get us caught.” I run my hand through his hair.
“You gotta break rules once in a while.” I whisper.
“What have you done with my Hermione? Imposter!” He holds his hand to his chest as though he’s been wounded. I giggle again and he chuckles before leaning in and kissing me to get me to be quiet.’
...
Draco walks back and forth in front of the wall where the room of requirements main entrance is on the seventh floor. The door appears and Draco is through the door before I can move a muscle. ‘This is gonna be a long night.’ I think as I follow him through the door.
The room is the same as last time but when I look back at the wall next to the door, the photo of Draco and me is gone. I look around and found it was nowhere to be seen in the room. I huff and pretend like I wasn’t looking for it and it didn’t bother me. I obviously couldn’t fool a hippogriff, luckily Draco wasn’t paying much attention to me. He was sitting in one of the arm chairs next to the fire eating his stupid apple and had a book open. When I sat down next to the coffee table I realize the book he had was a copy of the book I had shown him yesterday. I don’t questions it because this would have been a waste of my time if I made him mad and storm out.
“So… You on board for the 1880’s muggle ball?” I ask him without looking up at him as I pull out a piece of parchment, quill, and ink.
“Yea, sure, whatever.” He mumbles in response. I smirk and we go back to designing the decorations. He decided we were gonna change out the candles for crystalised lanterns. I was in charge of sending an owl to The Weird Sisters and asking them to play at the ball. It was close to sun down when our conversations changed from the winter solstice ball. We had been quiet for a few minutes, I was staring at the fire as it cackled and the wood seemed to never break down. Draco was still reading that book, which we found quite helpful with this timeline style.
“Did you mean any of it?” I said suddenly, breaking the silence. I see him stiffen in the corner of my eye, but I continue staring at the fire keeping my face as still as possible. It’s silent again besides the popping of the fire, but the noise of turning page doesn’t accompany the sound anymore.
“Would you even believe me if I say yes?” He says so inaudible that I barely heard him.
“Would you even mean it?” I say back after a few seconds.
He closes his book and sets it on the coffee table. “Yes,” He leans forward putting his forearms on his legs, “I would.”
I turn to look at him, his grey eyes are storming again and a rough piece of hair was out of line with his “perfect” hairline and was laying around his forehead. “But how do I know that isn’t a lie?” I stood up and walked to the book shelves just to get Draco out of my sight of vision. I grab onto a shelf to hold my shaking body still.
“Why would I lie about that Hermione?” His voice is filled with what he always portrayed to me as sadness, but how could I know for sure.
“I don’t know, why’d you lie to me the past two years?” I whispered loud enough for him to hear me.
“Hermione, listen I-” He began and I hear him get from the armchair.
I spin around and point my finger accusingly towards. “No Draco, you listen to me!” He’s lucky the coach is between us or I probably would have lost my cool and punched him again. “You ‘dated’ me,” I physically did air quotes, “only to get the accidental information I slipped about Harry so you could get him in trouble. And it so happens Professor Umbridge came around and YOU were the one who she gave the stupid job to find out what we were doing. You used me to figure that out so you could get that and one up him and Ron and the rest of us. How could I possible believe you?” I feel tears stinging my eyes but I refuse to cry and try to hold it in as much as possible.
He stand there for a second not saying anything, just being the beautiful, pale boy role he was handed by his father and mother when he was so young. “I understand how you feel Hermione.” He sits down on the coffee table, not daring to look me in the eyes and just stared at the ground. “But believe me that I am truly sorry, I’ve realized that there are things more important than my silly schoolboy rivalry with Harry and Ron. I want you to know I did love you…” He looks up at me and the storm has gone to a foggy morning in his eyes, “I do love you.”
I’m tempted to believe him, “No I don’t-” I turn away from him when I hear him stand up quickly.
“GODDAMMIT HERMIONE!” I jump frightened, I don’t think I’ve ever heard him raise his voice like this. “HOW COULD I FAKE THAT! ARE YOU SAYING THROUGH EVERYTHING THAT WENT ON YOU DIDN’T FEEL HOW REAL IT WAS?” I shake my head no as I shrug my shoulders.
“I don’t know what to think or feel Draco…” I no longer feel the one in power of this conversation and I begin to feel my tears silently slip down my cheeks.
“Then let me show you again how real it was and I mean let me.” I hear Draco moving closer to me and I whip around just as he gets to me and he pushes me against the bookshelves, I grab the shelves behind me to steady myself, and he kisses me.
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