The next four weeks turned into some kind of distorted blur, where days ran into nights and nights ran into days. I had been moving through the month like a mechanical robot, high on adrenalin, and how I hadn't totally combusted yet was unknown.
It was the month before I left for Exchange, which meant everything had to be organised in those last few weeks.
As I was leaving for half a semester, I would miss a whole syllabise in each subject, so I had been attending extra lessons each day to help me get slightly ahead. This meant that every free afternoon I'd had in the last month had been taken up by math and biology and old, substitute teachers who were three times my age.
Mason and I were then sent all of the details about the school we'd be attending and its location. The school was called Prescott Boarding Academy, co-educational, and was based in a small town twenty minutes out of London.
I looked up the school's website and was met with a grand, red bricked structure which looked very similar to that of a castle. Reading more about the school, I found out that it was over one-hundred and fifty years old, it had 11 different fields used for sport and whatnot, ten tennis courts, two swimming pools, an astro turf, a rock climbing wall, a gym, an indoor centre and even its own stables and arena for horse-riding.
And that was just for physical activities, I couldn't imagine how advanced they were when it came to academics and music.
Mason and I would both be boarding at Prescott, as both of the exchanges we would be switching places with were boarders.
I discovered that I'd be swopping places with a girl called Annabel Lesley. She seemed nice enough from the few obligated emails I'd had to send her. Thus, her current roommate, Molly Colton, would be mine for the next three months.
Mason would be boarding in the boy's dormitories, obviously, with an assigned roommate too. However who he was sharing with, I didn't know. After stumbling across the photographs in Mason's house that day, I had avoided him at all costs.
Well to be fair, that hadn't been my initial plan. The day after, I found Mason in the hallway.
~4 weeks earlier~
He was leaning against a locker and chatting with a bunch of his friends. I had stood a couple steps away from them and watched him as he talked, having a mental debate in my head. I still felt guilty about what had happened, because hey, I did have a heart.
So I decided to stall in the hallway and wait for Mason to finish his conversation. I must have looked like a creep, hanging around a random locker and shooting him impatient glances every couple of seconds. Had they even heard the bell?
Right before I was about to give up and sprint to class, Mason and his friends finally dispersed and breathing a sigh of relief, I quickly pushed myself from the locker. I caught Mason walking down the hallway alone, hands in his pocket, whistling nonchalantly, and not caring whatsoever that he was ten minutes late to class.
"Mason!" I called, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
His whistling stopped and he turned around in surprise. When his eyes fell on me though, they instantly turned into a dry exasperation. "And once again, I'm graced with the presence of Rose Pierce."
I narrowed my eyes and held my books tighter against my chest. "I'm not here to argue Mason, I just-"
A mocking laugh left his lips and his eyes glinted. "What else do we do?"
I curled my hand into a tight fist.
"Look." I said tightly. "I just wanted to apologise. That's it. I'm sorry."
Mason folded his arms and raised an eyebrow. "For what?" he replied casually and his face went smooth, covering all emotion whatsoever.
I stared at him in anger. Did he really need me to spell it out for him?
"For what happened yesterday." I clarified impatiently.
He cocked his head and rubbed his jaw. "Yeah, slapping me was uncalled for, however it is you we're talking about and-"
"What?" I interrupted, completely confused and getting more impatient by the second. "No! I'm not apologising for that-"
"Of course you're not."
"I'm apologising for what happened afterwards. In all fairness, I did get lost because your house is like a freaking mansion, and somehow I stumbled into... into that hall. I know that I should have left but- but I..." I trailed off, unsure of how to finish.
"But you just didn't." Mason finished, regarding me cooly.
"I'm sorry." I repeated, looking down.
I waited for him to reply, staring hard at the chipped, tiled floor. He could shout or call me names, I didn't really care. I had just wanted to get the guilt off of my chest.
However when the silence was eventually broken, it wasn't from insults or sharp words; instead it was broken with a sigh. I looked up at Mason and found him wearing a look of what seemed to be boredom. He raised a hand and ran it through his hair, something of which I was noticing to be a habit of his. Out of annoyance, anger, nervousness, I didn't know.
But then Mason was shrugging and he was wearing that superior, I'm-too-cool-for-you-and-everyone-else look, that had me gritting my teeth in annoyance.
"Whatever." He replied, nonchalantly. His eyes were steady on mine and unreadable. "It's just a musty room with a bunch of old photographs. Nothing special."
His words came out smooth and uncaring.
I opened my mouth, wanting to say something, to defend the beautiful pictures, however I couldn't seem to find my own words.
"Whatever." I finally muttered, turning to leave him.
"That's it?" He called from behind me. "No kiss to seal the deal?"
I stopped, clenching my jaw. "We didn't make any deal. I just came to apologise and now I have. Goodbye."
"Don't worry. I was only kidding. I know the prestigeous Miss Rose Pierce would never risk scandalising herself in public. You got that rep' to maintain, right?"
I growled before whipping around to face him. "I actually give up. You're always just going to be a self-conceited prick.
Mason cocked his head, causing a lock of blond hair to fall across his forehead.
"Wasn't this meant to be an apology? If so, calling someone a prick doesn't usually assist in getting you back into their good books."
He threw me an arrogant smirk, his eyes glowing like a cat.
I stared at him, lost for words. Almost in resignation, I muttered, "I can't believe that I'm going to be spending three months with you. On another continent. Alone."
The horrible reality of this washed through me and suddenly, I felt ill.
At the word 'alone' however, Mason's eyes glittered and he gave me a devilish smirk. "You know, most girls would be begging at their knees to have some alone time with me."
I threw him a look of disgust. "Ew."
Mason grinned and took a step closer to me. Everything in my body screamed for me to move away, but because I was stubborn, I stood my ground, not wanting to show any weakness in front of Mason Tanner.
"I bet I could make you change your mind." He said, his voice taunting.
He had moved under one of the cheap, fluorescent ceiling lights, and with it casting downwards onto his face, his jaw line became much more prominent on his face, standing out sharp and angled. Somehow, the look made him more intimidating. His eyes were devilish, and his body only got leaner and bigger as he moved towards me.
I scoffed. "Keep telling yourself that. I'd rather take Chinese water torture over you."
Mason responded with a slow and bemused look, and suddenly, I felt nervous. He took another leisurely step towards me, scanning my face for a reaction.
I however kept my gaze steady on his, except now my head was angled slightly upwards because of the height difference. I pushed my shoulders back however, trying to show that he wasn't bothering me in the slightest.
It felt more like I was trying to convince myself though.
"Chinese water torture huh?" he questioned in a soft, provoking voice. I swallowed and tried to answer, but the task of remaining calm was becoming harder by the second. Mason's toned chest was an inch away from mine and his closeness was putting me on edge. And the fresh, spicy smell of his cologne wasn't helping my thought process either.
I managed to nod.
He tilted his head a fraction more so that his eyes were looking directly into mine. They were intense and smouldering and held a deep amusement. He breathed softly, deliberately, and his minty breath fanned over my face.
"You would really undergo torture instead of kissing me?" He murmured tantalisingly.
Slowly, carefully, he moved his face until his lips were hovering just above my ear. "Honestly," he murmured, "I don't think you have it in you."
His lips brushing against my skin was sending goosebumps down my neck and arms and suddenly, it was becoming a bit too much.
My arms were clutching my books to my chest in some kind of desperate death-lock, and all of the oxygen that had passed through my lips was getting trapped in my throat, preventing me from speaking or breathing. I was so tempted to step back and give up on whatever point I was trying to prove. All I could see, feel and smell was Mason, and it was causing my hands to shake between our bodies.
But, still, for some unknown reason, I didn't move. I didn't know if was still because of my stubborn pride or something else entirely, but I remained rooted to the spot, and tried to control my breathing.
I could feel Mason's mouth pulling up into a grin against my skin and I bit my lip hard. Then with all of the strength I could muster I said, "I do... have it in me." Instead of the forcefulness I was hoping for, my voice came out weak and dry.
Mason let out a low, soft chuckle which vibrated against my ear and tightened something in my stomach. "You sure?" he crooned. And then as if I were watching in slow motion, he brought his hand up to my face. My eyes widened and my heart was pounding so loudly that I was pretty sure the whole damn school could hear it.
Mason did. He looked me in the eyes, challenging my fear. "Everything all right?" he asked innocently.
I forced down a teeth-gritting nod. Words had finally escaped me. Mason's glittering eyes turned thoughtful. "And this?" His fingertips brushed my cheek lightly and a small, inaudible gasp broke from my lips. "I... I-"
"And what about this?" At a deliberately slow pace, Mason then trailed his fingers up the side of my face, spreading goosebumps across my body, and eventually came to my hair. My hair was hanging loosely down my back, and before I knew what he was doing, Mason was running his fingers through the long locks.
I became still at his touch, staring over his shoulder and losing myself. He went at a deathly slow pace, starting from the top of my forehead, gently moving through the strands, grazing against my scalp in a way that broke shivers throughout my body.
And against my own defiant will, my eyes fluttered to a close, and all I could think about or focus on was the texture of Mason's fingers running through my hair and how good it felt.
I could hear his breathing in my ear, sounding somewhat shallow, and could feel his breath rising and falling against my skin. His fingers then eventually reached the back of my skull, and slowly they splayed out, cupping my head with a gentle ease.
Not aware of what I was doing, I leaned into him; felt the vibrations of his chest against mine, felt the strength that ran through his arm and into the hand which held me with a reassuring firmness. His thumb began to move in circles against the nape of my neck and more shivers of pleasure ran down my spine.
Only when I heard a hitch in Mason's breath did I finally wake up from the limb-binding, mind-numbing trance I had fallen into. My eyes suddenly snapped open and the shock of what had just happened ploughed into me like a car. My books crashed to the floor and I pushed myself away from Mason's chest with both my hands.
Mason stumbled back, clearly taken by surprise, and stared at me with wide eyes and a look of utter confusion.
"What the hell was that?" I demanded in anger. Though my anger wasn't directed towards him, it was at me. What had gotten into me? What... what the hell had just happened? My mind was whirring with wild thoughts as I stared at Mason, my chest rising and falling underneath me.
Mason for a second looked as lost as I felt. He ran a slightly unsteady hand through his hair, and opened and closed his mouth. But then he swallowed and a smug smile that looked incredibly forced fell upon his face. "Just proving a point."
I stared at him in fury, and suddenly there was nothing I wanted more than to just get out of the hallway which had all of a sudden become way too cramped. I marched forward and yanked my books off of the floor, not sparing him a glance.
Finally I stood up straight and looked him directly in the eyes. "There was no point proven." I snapped.
Mason responded with a devilish grin. "Whatever you say, sweetheart." He then chuckled softly and leant back against the locker.
I stood there for another second, anger steaming out of every pore in my body, and debated on responding, but quickly decided that I had been there long enough. So without another word I spun around and marched in the opposite direction, away from Mason.
Just before I turned the corner though, Mason called my name in a low, easy voice. I stopped, but didn't turn around. I didn't want to look at Mason after what had just happened, I felt embarrassed and angry and stupid.
So instead I stood with my back to him and waited for his words. They came out low and smug.
"Chinese water torture, my ass."
I bit my lip in rage... breathed in deeply in, and then carried on walking.
~~~
So ever since that... moment in the hallway, I had been avoiding him. Well, as much as I could. I was obliged to speak to him nearly every day as there were endless meetings and preparations that included both Mason and I, so it wasn't as though I was totally separate from him.
I spoke to him when I had to, he responded with his usual sarcastic quips, and then we parted. So really, nothing much had changed.
However, although the month had been a chaotic mess, it had slowly and finally begun to pull together. Last weekend I went to the mall to equip myself for England and its icy weather. We were going during their winter, which I guess, I didn't really mind. I liked the cold.
I had invited Kate, Adrianna and Beth to the mall with me to help me pick out some new outfits. Big mistake. A couple new outfits turned out to be an entire new wardrobe. Seriously, somehow they, they being mostly Kate and Ade, coaxed and convinced me into buying everything on the shelves, stating things like, 'It's a necessity Rose', or 'You'll freeze without this jacket.'
Eventually my last day did draw to an end and I welcomed it with excitement as well as nervous anticipation. Of course I was excited beyond comprehension to be finally leaving home, however, I couldn't help but get a bitter taste in my mouth at the thought of leaving my mother for three months.
She had always been with me throughout my entire life, and I with her, and now I would be leaving her to stay in a city that was over three thousand miles way.
I was also worried about her. Would she be okay all by herself? I found myself wishing once again that my father was still alive. It didn't even have to be for me, but for my mother, who I feared was lonely.
This was what I was doing on my last night. Sitting at my bedside table with an empty suitcase open on my right, and staring at my reflection, wondering if I was being selfish.
I stared worriedly into the mirror before exhaling heavily.
"What's the sigh for?" Asked my mother's voice, as she suddenly entered into my room. "You're not being sent to military camp."
I bit my lip, following her body in the mirror as she walked over to my bed. Her eyes landed on my empty suitcase and then screwed up in confusion. "I thought you were packing? What have you been doing?"
I glanced down at my hands. "Nothing." I mumbled. "I was just... um... I don't know what to pack?"
The sentence came out more as a question than a statement. My mum raised a disbelieving eyebrow at me. "Really? Even after buying out the entire mall, you still can't find something to take?"
I didn't respond and instead looked back down at my lap. My mum noticed my silence though and I heard the creak of the bed strings as she got up from it. I felt her hand come down on my arm, soft and familiar.
"What is it darling? What's bothering you?"
I bit my lip harder and continued to stare at my fingers, not knowing how to put my worries into words.
"It's nothing... I just...-" A ragged sigh left my lips and I brought my head up to look at her reflection.
"Are you going to be alright? You know, after I leave, will you be okay? I just... I just don't want you to be lonely, because you will be, for three whole months. And I guess I never really thought about you in this whole Exchange thing, and I'm sorry, it was selfish of me, and-"
"Rose!" My mother interrupted, frowning at me through the reflection. She then turned me in the chair to face her. "What on earth made you think of all of this?"
I shrugged tiredly. "I don't know, I guess I sort of just started worrying."
My mother shook her head with a firm expression on her gentle face. "Well you're wasting your thoughts on those worries. Honey, I am telling you right now that you do not have to worry about me. I'm going to be fine; of course I'm going to be fine. Hell, I'm going to be doing laundry for one, who wouldn't be happy about that?"
I shot her a dry look. "The love you have for me is marvelling."
My mother chuckled softly and stroked my cheek, fixing her calm gaze onto me. "Baby, I want you to go on this trip. I want it more than anything! I want you to get out of this town, see London, meet people, travel on a plane! I want you to have the time of your life and not worry about me for one second. Are we understood?"
A smile crept onto my lips and I gave her a fake salute. "Yes ma'am."
My mother grinned then and sat up rather abruptly from her haunches. "Right now, let's get you packed. Otherwise you're going to be staying at home and my speech would have been for nothing."
I stood up and shot her an amused smirk. "And somehow you've managed to make this about yourself."
A spark twinkled in her eyes like two winking stars. "Always is."
***
"Alright- are you absolutely and positively sure that you have everything? Passports, plane tickets, money- will you need some sleeping pills for the flight? It is long and-"
"Mom!" I interrupted in a loud and very embarrassed voice.
We were standing in the middle of the bustling airport, five o'clock in the evening, getting barged left right and centre by people who were on their own personal missions and had apparently developed impaired visions while doing so. It was an hour before our plane would be boarding and we were currently in the middle of saying goodbye.
However this 'goodbye' was becoming extremely delayed thanks to my wonderful, yet ever-paranoid, mother. She had been asking question after question for the last twenty minutes, triple checking for passports, worrying about us finding the boarding gate, what the aeroplane food would be like, and fretting if I had enough warm clothes.
Her cool and easy demeanour from last night had melted away and left an anxious, panicky mother in its place. I knew she was just worried and normally I wouldn't have minded... that much, however unfortunately, she was having her melt-down in front my friends, Mason, and half of the football team.
Kate, Ade and Beth had all come to see me off, and the same for Mason and his friends. We had all said our goodbyes and I had given Kate an extra bone-crushing hug. For us, this would be the longest time apart from each other, and I promised Kate that I'd Skype often and keep her in the loop.
At the same time, the guys were embracing Mason with manly hugs, ruffling his hair, and landing hard pats on his back for good measure. However between the teasing and joking, I caught actual glimpses of genuine sadness on each of their faces.
Despite Mason's popularity throughout the entire school, I could see now that these were his true friends. The ones who weren't with him only to climb up some shallow social ladder. And despite mine and Mason's shady relationship, I was happy that he had them. Everyone, even Mason, deserved real friends.
While my mother had been lecturing me about kidnappers and dodgy strangers, I had been stealing secretive glances towards Mason and his father who were off to the right saying goodbye. Despite the differences in hair and eyes colours, Mason and his father were extremely similar.
Their broad shoulders were both set back in an almost proud manner, their backs both upright. Looking more closely I picked up subtler details. The strong set of their jaws, the shape of their eyebrows, the effect they both had, no matter the age difference, on every woman who walked past the two men, all sending furtive glances in their direction.
However there was one thing that did stand out differently, and that was their facial expressions. Mason's was closed, hard, sharpened with a sarcasm that I knew all too well, whilst his father's was softer, sadder. I watched as Mason's father said something quietly, cautiously, with an almost pleading in his eyes, and then watched Mason as he sneered in response, crossed his arms and moved his mouth to shape a few, quick words.
Looking more closely at Mason's father, I couldn't help but notice a certain... sadness that lingered on his face. A weary, tired sadness that made me feel sorry for Mason's father. Especially since he had a son like Mason, someone I'm sure wasn't the easiest person to live with.
My examination of the two Tanners came to an abrupt end when Mason's eyes suddenly flickered over to my face. I quickly averted my own gaze before any expression could fall onto his face.
Getting caught staring? Really?
Soon though his dad left, and I noticed through the corner of my eye that the two hadn't even embraced, there were just a few more short words, and then abruptly Mason turned around, leaving his father to stare after him.
A hot spike of anger flared inside of me towards Mason. Could he not see how miserable his father looked? Or did he not care? I sighed, deciding to stay out of it. I didn't know the relationship between them, and frankly, I didn't want to. One Tanner was enough for me to handle.
Mason then sauntered over towards my direction, where our friends were talking in a group, and I suddenly realised that my mum was still rambling on about my safety. Catching an amused smirk from Mason I quickly decided that enough was enough.
"Mom!" I exclaimed and literally covered her moving mouth with my hand.
Her eyes widened slightly.
"Mom." I repeated again, but this time more calmly. "Stop. I am going to be fine, I promise. I will look after my passport, and avoid dodgy strangers. I will call you every day if need be. But please just relax. Okay?"
She stared back at me and then her eyes softened and she nodded. I removed my hand and stared at her sceptically. "Are you okay now?"
My mom let out a breathless laugh and shook her head. "I'm sorry baby... I just...-"
"I know." I told her quietly. Taking her hand in mine, I said, "I know. I'm scared too. But everything's going to be fine. I promise."
My mother stared at me for a long second before an easy, warm smile fell onto her face. "Of course it is. Sorry, I guess being ridiculously paranoid is under the motherly requirements." Her eyes then glanced down at her watch. "You should go now." She said. "Go and get checked in and then at least you will have a bit of time to relax before the flight."
I nodded and looked around for Mason to see that he was standing amongst our group of friends, lightly chuckling over something. As if sensing my eyes on him, he looked towards me and I gestured my head towards the check-in gates. He nodded, gave his friends a last goodbye, while I did the same with mine, and then it was just us and my mother left.
Suddenly feeling a little emotional with having to say goodbye, I pulled my mum into a strong, hard hug. I breathed in her warm, clean smell, and murmured quietly. "I love you."
I felt her hand stroke down my hair. "I love you too, sweetheart."
Slowly I pulled apart and saw that my mother's eyes had a slight sheen to them although she was trying very hard not to show it. Glancing to my left I saw that Mason had averted his eyes and had been looking down at the floor. As I was about to say that we should go, my mother then turned to Mason, surprising him and me.
She rested her hand on his toned arm, immediately making him stiffen, and gave him a warm smile. Looking him in the eyes she said, "I hope you have an amazing time too, sweetheart. Stay safe alright? The both of you."
I rolled my eyes at her words and turned to Mason to say that we should go but was halted by his expression. He was staring at my mother with a look of shock on his face. Or maybe it was confusion. I couldn't tell. And then something else ran across his face. Sadness. It was short and brief and gone within one second to the next, but it had been there, stark and sharp as a knife tip.
"Mason?" I questioned, and then he was suddenly picking up his suitcase and running a hand through his hair and muttering that we should head. I nodded, slightly baffled, and gave my mum one last hug, promising that I would call as soon as we landed, before following Mason to the check-in gates.
Passing my bag through the foreign scanners, I could suddenly feel the excitement fluttering deep in my stomach. I bit my lip, hardly containing my grin, when I walked through the tall metal detector.
Whilst moving through it though, a loud beeping noise erupted and in a total reflex of fear, I jerked both of my arms into the air and exclaimed in a panicked voice, "I didn't do anything! I swear, I didn't do anything!"
Everybody stared at me and the man dressed in uniform in front of me said in a rather amused voice, "Ma'am, I think it's just your belt."
And then Mason Tanner burst out laughing.
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