Aubrey
Desire came back in the house and smiled at me.
"Mommy did Augie leave?" Imani asked.
"Yes baby. He said he would see you later." She said.
"Mommy do you love Augie?" Da'sani asked.
I just looked at Desire to see how she would answer this question.
It felt like the world had stopped. Hell I felt like I had stopped breathing.
"Mommy cares about Augie. He is a very good friend." She said.
I blew out a breathe not even realizing that I was really holding my breath.
"Mommy he makes you smile and laugh. He doesn't make you sad and cry all the time like daddy did." Imani said.
That broke my heart into a million pieces.
My daughter's were young and for them to have the understanding that I made their mother cry and August didn't just screamed volumes in my ear.
"Daddy doesn't make me cry baby. Sometimes mommy just gets emotional." Desire said trying to make me feel better.
"Don't tell stories mommy. You said to Auntie Keya that daddy just keep hurting you." Imani said.
Tears fell from my eyes. I couldn't believe that this was coming from my children.
"Daddy stop making mommy cry okay." Da'sani said.
I just shook my head. I had to excuse myself from the table.
I went out back and I broke down. My daughter's knew that I was the cause of their mother's unhappiness.
Did my daughter's secret hate me for hurting their mother?
Desire
I saw the hurt in his eyes. Hearing his daughter's tell him all that and hear the questions they were asking hurt him.
"Girls let's clean up and go to the playroom." I said to them.
We cleaned up and AD fell asleep. I put him down and the girls went and watched Frozen in the theatre.
I went outside to find Aubrey breaking down.
"My daughter's think I'm a bad daddy." He said.
I sat next to him and tried to comfort him.
"You are a great father. This is why I wanted out. I never wanted them to see us just fighting all the time. Aubrey they are getting older and they are smart." I said.
"Des am I that bad?" He asked with red eyes.
"When it's good it's great, but when it's bad it's terrible. We have a chance now to show them something different and better." I said to him.
I feel like this was the eye opener he needed. Will it get us back together? I don't know.
The only thing that I do know is that I don't want my girls to think that they have a terrible father.
"Let's set a better example." He said and I agreed.
We went back inside and watched Frozen with the girls.
As Da'sani sang Let It Go, Imani sat on her daddies lap. She turned to him and kissed his cheek.
"I love you Daddy. I just want you to be nice to mommy okay." She called herself whispering to him.
I saw the tears fall from his eyes.
"Okay baby girl." He said hugging her tightly.
That brought tears to my eyes.
What was I going to do?