Caspian's POV
"Caspian, come on. You've been sitting inside for weeks. Come outside and do something," Jaelyn begged.
"I don't feel like it, Jae," I said back, sighing. Her and Anastasia had been taking turns harassing me for hours and it was getting to be really draining. "I just want to sit here and write my letter."
"You haven't written anything down in the past two hours," she pointed out.
"Well I'm working on it," I shot back.
"Sure you are," she said, clearly not believing me, "why are you so hesitant to write to her anyway?"
I considered pretending that I didn't know what she was talking about, but decided against it. If I didn't tell her, then she would just have another thing to harass me about. "Because she never responds."
"She probably would if you actually sent any of the letters you write."
"I've sent every letter I've written," I defended, "she just hasn't replied. To any of them."
"Caspian," she said sadly, "if you don't want to send them then fine, but you don't need to lie to me about it."
"I'm not lying," I told her, getting annoyed, "she sends her wolf down here every few days, and I send all the letters I've written with him, and then she never responds. It doesn't even make sense to send the wolf in the first place if the communication is one-sided."
"So if you send all the letters, how do you explain the pile of them right there?" She asked, sounding irritated and pointing in the direction of Anastasia's corner of the cave.
"Jaelyn, there isn't anything over there," I told her snappily, "even if I did never send the letters, why would I keep them with Anastasia's stuff?"
She huffed at me, walking away. I sighed in relief, turning back to the pen and paper in my hand. All I could do was stare at it blankly. What do you say to someone who's been avoiding you for 3 weeks? "Hi Zariah. Was just wondering why you've been ignoring me. Hope it wasn't that kiss"? I shook my head at the thought. That was stupid.
There was suddenly a huge stack of letters thrown in my lap. "Still gonna keep lying to me?" Jaelyn asked irritably.
"Lie about wh-" my sentence was cut off when I looked down at the letters. Zariah, the top one read. Ok, that's weird, I thought to myself. There was no way they were all labelled Zariah though. I had sent all the letters. That top one must have been a fluke. The second one also had her name on it. The third too, and the fourth. I was quickly shuffling through the massive pile, all of the envelopes having the same addressee on them.
"This doesn't make any sense," I muttered to myself, "I sent them all. I put them in Statera's collar and watched him leave with them..."
"Wait, so you actually didn't deliberately not send them?" Jaelyn asked, shocked.
"No," I said annoyed, "I've been telling you that for the past ten minutes."
"But then why are they here?" she questioned.
"I'd like to know the same thing."
"And why are they with Anastasia's things?"
"Another good question," I responded, "maybe-wait!" I said, suddenly realizing something.
"What?" Jaelyn asked.
"Kind of strange isn't it? How Anastasia doesn't like Zariah and the letters I thought I had sent to her have mysteriously ended up with Anastasia's stuff?"
"Caspian, you don't think Anastasia-"
"Yes I do think Anastasia," I interrupted her.
"Caspian, wait!" Jaelyn said, but she was too late. I was already outside, glaring at the girl in question.
"Caspian," she grinned, "I'm glad to see you finally decided to join us!" She clearly hadn't seen my glare, because she would not be that cheerful if she had.
"Care to explain these?" I said, tossing a handful into her lap. Her and Alistaire were sitting by the fire pit, cooking lunch.
"Why are you throwing-oh." she said, finally looking at what I had thrown at her.
"Yeah," I snapped, "oh." She didn't say anything back and I got more pissed. "Well," I said loudly, "why the Hell do you have those?"
"Um," she said.
The longer it took for her to answer, the more pissed I got. I felt my hands heating up, my skin tingling from the feeling of fire just below its surface. "Why do you have them," I asked again through gritted teeth.
"If I told you, you would just get more pissed."
"That's making me more pissed," I shot back.
"Caspian-" she said, stopping again. It was getting very frustrating.
"Were you even going to tell me that you were stealing my letters? Or were you just going to let me think Zariah hated me forever?"
"No, I planned to tell you," she said, "I've just been trying to think of a way to bring it up without pissing you off."
"Oh, and how is that going for you?" I asked bitterly.
"Well it was going fine until now," she muttered. I don't think I was supposed to hear it, but unluckily for her, I did.
My anger increased, and the fire that was itching to be used came to the surface, forming fireballs around my clenched fists.
"Caspian, calm down," Anastasia said. As if that's going to work, I thought, rolling my eyes. The fireballs got bigger, growing to engulf my forearms as well.
Fire was not an element I used often, despite the fact that I couldn't control which element I used when. Fire usually happened when I was pissed, and I had to be really pissed. I didn't even get mildly pisssed very often, so it made sense that fire was rare.
Before I could accidentally do something stupid I left, walking toward the ocean.
Fucking Anastasia. She could at least try to get along with Zariah. Just a little bit of effort would be nice.
Caspian?
Wait, what? I looked around quickly, trying to find out where she was. She was nowhere to be found.
Ok, awesome. I'm fucking crazy. Hearing voices and shit.
The voices in my head are talking about hearing voices. What the actual fuck?
Of course the voices in my head sound like Zariah. Why the heck not, right?
I can think of lots of reasons why not.
Apparently the voices don't understand sarcasm.
I was so confused. It sounded so much like Zariah, but just wasn't. It was disorienting and weird. I decided to ignore it for now.
Maybe it's fine. Maybe I'm just being paranoid. Yeah, that must be it; paranoia.
I don't think paranoia causes your head voices to be paranoid and weird.
Well apparently it does, considering that's literally what's happening right now.
Capsian, I don't think that's what's happening...
Ok, Creepy Zariah Voice, if you're going to be stuck in my head and refuse to go away, you don't get to address me directly.
Caspian, I'm not a voice in your head.
What do you mean? Of course you are.
I am not. I mean, technically I am, but not one your brain made up on its own.
Well obviously. Zariah is a real person; you aren't completely made up.
I'm not made up at all. Caspian, I think I'm actually in your head.
That's impossible. People can't hear each other's thoughts in real life. That's made up movie stuff.
It seems not.
Ok, Weird Voice, you may exist in my mind but you aren't going to make me believe that I can hear people's thoughts. I'm not crazy. Despite the fact that you exist.
You're right, you're not crazy. But you're also wrong. It's actually Zariah. I'm actually in your head.
Bullshit.
I can prove it.
Sure you can.
I can. Do you remember that horrifying scary dream Hell?
Yeah?
Well, like I said then, we are mates. That explains the weirdness.
That proves nothing. A made up voice can come up with explanations for its existence.
Ok, fair enough. That's a valid point. I can still prove it though.
Good luck with that.
I can tell you exactly what happened in the dream Hell.
My mind knows what happened too; it was present when it was happening. That proves nothing.
.......... ok, maybe I can't prove it. But that doesn't mean it isn't true.
It kind of does.
Ugh, Caspian, would you just chill for a second and listen to me?
At least you sound more like Zariah now, but you still aren't her.
I am too! Shut up and listen for a second. The Earth goddess woman- she said we were going through some sort of mating ritual, remember?
Yes, I remember. I also remember the real Zariah saying it was bullshit, further proving you're not her.
Yeah, but I changed my mind after that.
You're a made up voice, you don't have a mind to change.
I'm not a made up voice, so I do too have a mind to change. And I expressed to you in my mind Hell that I had changed my mind and thought we were mates. Anyways, I think Cessatia was right. She said we were in Stage 2 when we talked to her. Maybe this is Stage 3.
If I had any doubt before, I definitely don't now. Zariah would never change her mind and admit someone was right.
Wow, thanks Caspian. Your Faith in my character is astounding. And I also told you already, in person (well, sort of) that I changed my mind and she was right.
I ignored the last comment, shaking my head back and forth to clear it. That was literally the craziest thing to ever happen to me. At least I had calmed down now and wasn't on fire anymore.
I debated turning back around to get some damn answers but decided against it. I hadn't completely calmed down yet, and I didn't need to go getting all fiery again. I could confront Anastasia later. Or maybe I could just not confront her and never speak to her again.
I heard a giggle from somewhere ahead of me, and a confused look crossed my face as I ran a few feet ahead and saw nothing. Caspian, you better not be actually going crazy...I heard the giggle again, but saw nothing when I looked around to find the source. What the Hell is going on?
I continued walking for a little while, not hearing anymore giggles. I had almost made it down to the beach, and I started to feel more calm. I was approaching a small hill, the beach just on the other side. I could hear the waves crashing onto the sand and it was soothing.
I was about halfway up the hill when I heard another giggle. For fuck's sakes, I thought to myself, convinced I was actually imagining things. Until I made it to the crest of the hill, that is. As I got to the top, I could see a woman dancing in the water. Her long, white dress was visibly soaked through with water, but still seemed light, as if the water didn't weigh it down at all.
In the midst of her dancing, she caught a glimpse of me and stopped. "You mortals are so strange," she giggled, "you're in denial about all of the fun parts of life." I had no idea how I could hear her from up here; she had to be a few metres away. "Caspian, don't look so confused, just come down here," she said.
I was dubious at first, but then I remembered what she had said earlier, 'you mortals are so strange.' I assumed she was another goddess, so I went down to meet her.
When I got to her, she smiled at me. "Hello, Caspian. I'm Vivacie."
"A-another elem-mental deit-ty I assume?" I suggested. Meeting strangers always made me stutter. I hated it.
"Well of course," she said, giggling, "who else could bring you to Elementum?"
"E-element-tum? Wh-what's tha-at?"
"Well it's this plane of existence, Child. Honestly, Cessatia makes everything so difficult," she huffed. I hadn't noticed that I was in the weird spirit realm place again until she had said something, but I noticed now. It was much quieter and everything just looked and felt ever so slightly different than the real world.
"Wh-what do y-you me-ean?" I asked, not sure what Cessatia had to do with this.
"She brings you Elementals here, but only gives you half the information. It makes everyone else's jobs difficult."
"H-how man-many of y-you are th-there?"
"Well, each Elemental has their own deities, and there are about 500 Elementals in the world right now, each with 4-5 deities, so I'd say there are currently about 2500 or so elemental deities."
I was about to say something, but she continued talking before I could, "but that's not what I wanted to talk about. I have answers to your questions about Zariah."
"Y-you do?"
"Why of course, Caspian," she said, giggling again, "I know everything about your destiny and your life and all that."
"Wh-what did Cess-cessatia mean wh-when she s-said Zariah was the k-key to con-controlling my pow-powers?" I noticed that I didn't stutter when saying Zariah's name, and decided to think on that later.
"Caspian," she chastised, "I can't give you all the answers. And that one is especially important for you to figure out on your own."
"W-well wha-what can y-you te-tell me?"
"I'll tell you what," she said, an exciting grin appearing on her face, "let's play a game. If you win, I'll give you all of the answers I can give you right now. If you lose, I will answer one question, so long as it's one I can answer."
"A g-game? Th-this see-seems lik-like s-something t-too ser-serious for a-a game."
"Caspian, don't be such a party pooper. There's always time for a game. Nothing is too serious."
I just glared at her, strongly disagreeing and really not wanting to play a stupid game. I just wanted answers.
"Why are you so serious all the time?" she questioned, "it'll be fun, come on."
I continued glaring.
"I'm not going to answer any questions if you don't play," she said in a singsong-y voice.
"F-fine," I huffed, "wh-what's th-the g-game?"
"The game is super easy. I'll throw balls of water at you, and you'll try to use Earth to block them."
"B-but I c-can't con-control my p-powers."
"Well then this will be good practice," she said, giggling cheerfully, "and who knows? Maybe answers will motivate you to try harder to have that control."
"A-and ev-even if I l-lose, I get o-one ans-answer, r-right?"
"Yep, that's the deal," she said cheerfully.
"O-ok," I agreed.
"Wonderful," she said.
I started to mentally prepare myself for the use of Earth. I closed my eyes, clearing all thoughts from my mind. I focused on the Earth around me, feeling my mind connecting with the element. When I opened my eyes a couple seconds later, there was already a ball of water headed directly for my face. I instinctively moved my hands to block my face, and when I did, the dirt underneath me shifted, a section of the ground moving upwards along with my hands, and blocking the water.
"Good, Caspian," Vivacie said, "you might actually do better than I thought." I was overcome by a sense of pride and got so absorbed in the fact that I had done something right that I almost missed the ball of water heading for the left side of my body. I moved my left arm up to block myself, the Earth following.
"Nicely done," Vivacie said, "you should always be careful not to lose focus. Always be paying attention to your surroundings."
I successfully blocked three more attacks, and was shocked at my accomplishment. "Five successful blocks, Caspian," Vivacie counted, "if you block 10, you win."
I had now been attacked from the front twice, the top once, left once, and right once, and had successfully blocked all of them. "You're doing exceptionally well. Based on what I've heard from the others, I wasn't sure you would make it this far. I want you to try something else," she suggested, attacking from the front again.
"While maintaining focus, continuing your connection with Earth, and paying attention to your surroundings, I want you to try to also connect with water. See if you can sense where it's going to be coming from."
Well how am I going to do that? I thought to myself. To connect with the elements, I always had to close my eyes and clear my head. I very clearly couldn't close my eyes while blocking these attacks; that was setting myself up for failure. I couldn't clear my mind either; I needed to stay connected to Earth.
I blocked another attack from the left, trying to think of a solution. Ok, Caspian. The way you connect to elements is by focusing on a specific area and reaching out with your mind. What is the nearest water source? The ocean! Ok, so maybe if we reach out to the ocean, we can make a connection.
I tried reaching out to the ocean. I thought of the saltiness of the water and the calming sounds of the waves, and felt the connection happen. Yes! Another attack was coming at me from behind and I spun around and moved my arm in an upwards arcing motion. It successfully moved the earth and blocked the attack. "I see you've made the connection with water, Caspian. You've successfully blocked seven water balls. Two more and you win. Try to use your water connection to sense where the next attack is coming from."
I tried to do as she asked. I forgot about the ocean, and focused on whatever water was nearest to me. It took me a second, but I found it. It was underneath me. I directed my hands toward my feet, attempting to solidify the Earth and block the water from coming through, but instead, the water splashed in my face.
I lowered the raised earth around me back to its original position, setting it back to normal and fixing all the cracks. I felt a mixed sense of disappointment and pride; I had lost, but at the same time I had blocked 7 consecutive attacks and connected with two elements at one time.
"Caspian, I am so impressed!" she shouted in excitement, "that was phenomenal. I thought you couldn't control your powers?" she said.
I just smiled at her, too out of breath to respond. It had taken a lot of effort to keep up with all of Vivacie's attacks, and it had been exhausting.
"Your skills are coming along swimmingly and everything is on the right track. However, a deal is a deal; you didn't block 10 balls of water, which means you lost. I'll answer one question."
I wanted to ask her again how Zariah was meant to be the key to controlling my powers, but she had said earlier that she couldn't tell me that, and I didn't think she would change her mind now. I didn't want to ask anything too extreme in case she wasn't allowed to answer that either, and I didn't know if I could ask a different question if that was the case. So I stuck with something that seemed to be a really minor question that didn't interrupt me discovering my destiny on my own, "c-can Zariah r-read my mi-mind?"
"Yes and no," Vivacie replied. For a second, I worried that she was just going to simply answer like that without actually giving me any helpful information, but she continued, "you and Zariah have a super deep mental connection now. You completed stage 2 of your mating ritual and can hear each other's thoughts now. It isn't really reading; you can only hear each other when the thoughts are, for lack of better word, loud. If you're feeling really strongly about something or are thinking really hard and are really focused on something, the other one will patch into that and be able to hear what it is you're so emotional about or focused on."
"So-"
"I have to go now, Caspian. This has been fun. I'm sure I'll see you again," she grinned, and then I was back in the real world.
Well, Zariah, I thought to myself, not sure if I was thinking 'loud' enough for her to hear, it seems you were right. Again.