I should be on my way to India by now, but I'm not and it's all my mum's fault, she's the reason that I missed my flight; okay, so maybe I did neglect the fact that I needed a visa to get into India but that's beside the point.
She must have a sixth sense or something because it wasn't even as if I'd told her about my plans to flee the country, but when I went downstairs mid-morning yesterday, she was sat at the breakfast bar — the kettle was boiling and she had a box of Maltesers, and they're my absolute faves.
"Have you got five minutes love?" she said to me with a smile.
And I wanted to tell her that no I didn't have five minutes, in fact, I barely had any time at all, I needed to pack. Thanks to lastminutesdeals.com I had less than twelve hours until my flight. But she put her arm around my shoulders, sat me down and placed a cup of tea and the chocolates in front of me, how could I say no?
"How are you love? I know things have been a bit tough lately, but they'll get better, it always does."
"I'm fine. Honestly, I'm fine." I didn't want to have a heart to heart with my mum, firstly because I would probably end up bloody crying again, and I'd already cried enough — more importantly, though I had a flight to catch. But still, I sat with my mum in the kitchen talking about everything, well almost everything.
"Let's get a takeaway tonight, and I got you some new pyjamas upstairs - I know how you love new pyjamas," my mum said.
Eating my Chinese takeaway while wearing my fluffy new pyjamas I knew everything would be okay because doing this kind of thing when I was a kid always made everything okay again. Even at that point, I was still convinced that I would be leaving for India — I would be starting a new life; I would be spending six or maybe twelve months travelling and on a journey of self-discovery, broadening my horizons and becoming a better me.
And then I missed my flight
I had to drag myself back into work today, Aaron wasn't exactly surprised to see me walking through the door. Maybe he's right though; maybe I don't have to leave town. Getting wasted and snogging Shaun isn't exactly the end of the world; it's not going to ruin my life — mainly because Ben has already done that.