|Revised|
TAEJOON/VMON WARNING
This chapter has been heavily revised in certain parts, so please re-read it
•••
Missed Calls (3) My VanGogh
Unread Messages (7) My Van Gogh
Namjoon smiled and unlocked his phone, quickly dialing the number back and not even bothering to read the messages. He waited. And waited.
And waited.
But no one picked up.
His smiled faded and he stared at the screen. "Dammit. Please...." He wasn't worried that his lover wasn't' picking up the phone, he was more worried about the reason as to why. Did he think that Joon moved on after going eight months without seeing or talking to him? Think he gave up and tried to pursue the guy he was infatuated with?
Well anyone would, honestly. In fact, would a good boyfriend even allow that to happen?
The thought made Namjoon coward away from the phone, lowering his hand. He was a terrible boyfriend, but he wasn't a liar, not anymore. Or a cheater. He was honest and told his lover straight up that he was infatuated with someone else. Like any boyfriend, he acted quite pissed off at the fact that his boyfriend had grown feelings for someone else but it wasn't really that he had grown feelings. Those feelings were always there.
Just like his feelings for Taehyung.
But V never understood...
He sucked in a breath and redialed the number with a smile and just as the phone rang once, the line picked up. "Hello?" a deep voice asked.
"Taehyung!" Namjoon said as he perked up, spinning around. "God I- I'm so sorry I didn't answer earlier! I left my phone home and I've been training."
"It's okay. You're forgetful, lovely, don't worry," the other chuckled, making Namjoon smile. Namjoon may have not felt the same as he did for V or Taehyung but he sure as hell missed him and he knew there was still some kind of love there.
"I haven't heard from you for a while-"
"Since I went on tour."
"I miss you," Namjoon sighed, hearing nothing but silence for a few minutes. He thought the line died but then he heard the husky voice chuckle lightly.
"You don't know how bad I missed you, Joonie."
"When will you be back? I...It's been lonely- I've been lonely without you. I miss our little surprise ice cream dates and-and those little surprise cards you'd leave in my backstage dressing room and in my studio."
".....those are all things V does with you, love.....if anything, I'd think hanging out with Jin would fill in any loneliness," Taehyung laughed dryly.
Namjoon gulped. "You know he hates me, Tae, and you know V is mad at me-"
"But you don't hate him. You feel quite the opposite...and just give V time. He'll come around, don't worry."
"Tae" Namjoon said firmly. "Please don't start....I just...I don't want our first phone call to turn badly. To turn into another fight..."
"......"
"How's V?"
"He's fine. Tired."
"He's been busy?" Joon scoffed.
"We are on tour, so...."
"I know," Namjoon chuckled. "But you're both the idol. It's not like he's talented and you're talentless. You're both gifted."
"Just because we're on tour doesn't mean he doesn't need to deal with stuff, too...I Just...I hate having to do tasks on top of not being home....." Taehyung whined out and Namjoon could picture him pouting, his bottom lip slightly overlapping his upper as his brows furrowed.
"I know, baby. Just-You can do it, okay? When you get back I'll....shower you with affection."
"Are....Are kisses included this time?" he stammered and Namjoon only grinned.
"Only if V- you want, okay? just hold out longer. You'll be back soon."
"Well....I actually wanted to talk to you about that."
Namjoon gulped and thought his lover would break the horrible news of tour dates being added, postponing him from returning for even longer. Namjoon tried to stay calm as he nodded as if Taehyung could see him. "Wh-what's wrong?"
"I.....Joon, Can we meet tonight?"
"What? Tae, you know I can't fly out there, I'm working-"
"Joon," Taehyung whispered, voice laced with a smirk. "I'm already back in Seoul."
Namjoon's eyes widened and he jumped in place. "Kim Taehyung! You asshat, you scared me!" he hissed out, earning a light laugh. "God- I thought you were going to tell me some bad news- don't do that to me!"
"Awe, but I didn't even do anything, pumpkin." Namjoon blushed and rubbed the tip of his nose, not wanting to reply because he knew he'd stutter. "Anyways. I want to meet tonight. Let's celebrate. I'm finally going to do something I should've done a while ago. I've been thinking about it for a few weeks so...i think tonight, with you, would be......I'll finally be able to do it. Okay?"
"Just the two of us?"
"Unless you want to invite others. We could go to a club? I'm bringing Jimin along with me- well, I'm being forced to. He knows I'm going to meet up with you so he's tagging along. Bring Jin if you want."
Namjoon frowned at the mention of that name. "Taehyung, it's to celebrate you being back, don't you think it should just be you and me?"
"Whatever you want, buttercup."
This would be an excellent time for Namjoon to redeem himself. Show Taehyung, maybe V, that he really did care about him. Both of them. And that he wasn't ready to let go of either of them. "I just want it to be us, Tae."
"Great. Honestly....so did I. Then, I'll see you later on? At 9?"
"Of course."
".......Hey, Joonie?"
"Yes?"
"I'll see you tonight..." the voice said, sounding a bit huskier than before and Namjoon bit the inside of his lip. V? He smiled and blushed while staring down at his feet.
"You, too...."
The latter hung up and Joon just stood there smiling to himself. He was happy he'd finally be able to see his boyfriend after eight months of having absolutely no contact. He knew the man must've been tired and exhausted, and his lack of calling him only proved it.
He knew that a month before he left he was assigned a task that he was having trouble with and he only wished that Taehyung wasn't still stressing over it. "I'm surprised he wants to meet up at a club..." Joon hummed to himself as he heard a knock on the door. Before he could go answer it he heard it open, followed by a
"Why the hell isn't your door locked?!"
Namjoon gulped and walked out of his room to see a slightly shorter male with his arms folded, a bag in one hand full of who knew what. His plump lips were in a pout but his eyes were set in a glare.
"Kim, what the hell, are you trying to get murdered or something?"
"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. Not much concern to you, Jin-hyung."
Jin only rolled his eyes and held his arm out, handing him the bag. "Here. Jungkook wanted me to give it to you as an early birthday present."
Namjoon took the bag and frowned. "It's June. My birthday isn't for another 3 months?"
"Jungkook's taking an entrance exam for some cheap schooling. He wants to get back into it with the money he's saved up from working with me and from the money you've been secretly putting in his account." Jin looked at Namjoon with uncertainty. "If he passes he'll be going there next month and won't be here when your birthday arrives."
"O-oh," Namjoon said, looking into the bag and grinning at the suckers that were scattered on top. "Clothes?"
"He said you needed some help with your fashion and for once I agreed with him. Why do you always wear this kind of jeans? Aren't you supposed to be, like...a wannabe rapper?"
"I am a rapper, Jin."
"Hm. Could've fooled me."
Namjoon felt his heart flutter and he frowned, looking back into the bag. Why did he have to be so infatuated by someone who was such an asshole to him? TO someone who pole danced and stripped in secret just to make enough money to spoil Jungkook? Why couldn't he have stayed so infatuated with Taehyung and V? Why did the feelings he had for this hyung grow over time with no talking rather than diminish???
"Your apartment is complete shit," Jin said, walking to the door. "You're making more money than needed, why don't you move out of this shithole?"
"Unlike some people, I don't just spend money whenever I have it," Namjoon replied. "I like saving. I'm still humble. Plus, this place isn't that bad-"
"Looks like a motel," Jin cut him off as he opened the door.
"Well, we like it."
Jin froze and looked over his shoulder. "You talked to him?"
"Just barely."
"I swear...I won't hesitate to hurt you if Jungkook finds out. You'd break the poor boy. You haven't told Jungkook, right?"
"Of course not!"
Jin nodded. "Keep it that way, Namjoon." Jin swiftly exited the apartment, leaving Namjoon to stand there with the bag. He set it down on the couch and looked over at the clock. It was only 5, so he had three more hours to go until he had to leave, so he decided he'd take a nap to pass the time.
And it worked amazingly.
Namjoon woke up and took a quick shower before dumping out the bag, seeing the clothes Jungkook got him. He pulled on the white shoulder-length shirt and pulled on the black jeans that came with it. The two buttons near his chest were unbuttoned and the neck opening was quite big, revealing his collarbones in a low-cut V-neck.
He let his pink hair hang down in his face as he checked himself out in the mirror. When he thought he was ready he grabbed his keys and darted out of the house and practically ran to the club they use to go to a lot.
Once he was there he stood in a line, not wanting to go through the VIP section. He didn't want to attract attention to him, he just wanted to see his boyfriend and make up for all the things he hadn't said. He was nervous about what Taehyung had planned. What was he going to do? Maybe announce them to the public? They'd get fired, wouldn't they? Namjoon smiled at the thought.
At the thought of finally being able to quit this shit hole with someone he knew would support him.
The line moved slowly and it took Namjoon about another hour to get inside, but when he was in he felt adrenaline pump through his veins as all of his senses were heightened. He texted Taehyung to meet him by the bar area. He ordered a couple of alcoholic beverages as he waited, more nervous than he really should be.
It wasn't like they had left things on good terms before the tour. Both angry and pissed at each other. V angry at Joon for confessing those feelings and Taehyung angry at Joon for making V so upset and Joon upset at Taehyung for not taking his side. He was never mad at V though, because he understood where he was coming from. He knew how it felt to know the one you loved...loved someone or something else.
V was uptight and seemed to become snappy at Namjoon, but Namjoon knew he had every right to. Hell, V learned that Namjoon was wanting to pursue another man. Any significant other would react the way he did. But it wasn't Namjoon's fault, he couldn't help the things he felt.
The things he had felt way before he met V.
He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around, eyes wide as he saw silver hair that was curled, covering deep brown eyes that stared at him fondly. A single long piercing hanged from his left ear and he wore a baggy dress shirt.
His cheeks immediately heated up and he gulped. "Tae?"
"Geez, I thought you had already drunk to the point of slurring," Tae laughed before he scoffed, leaning against the bar and taking Namjoon's drink from his hand. He stared into Namjoon's eyes while downing the shot.
Namjoon was stuck in awe. Taehyung was such a beautiful man. So gorgeous. Kind. Sweet. He knew how good he was. You could see it in his eyes.
Taehyung leaned closer and buttoned the only buttons near Namjoon's neck before tugging on the shirt and pulling him closer, noses touching. "I don't like when you're so exposed, Namjoonie."
"S-sorry," Namjoon breathed out, eyes focusing on Taehyung's lips, which formed a soft smirk.
So fucking gorgeous...
"My eyes, Joonie. My eyes while I'm talking." Namjoon looked up at Taehyung and swallowed the lump in his throat as Taehyung's thumb caressed his bottom lip. "I missed you so damn much, Joon. So much more than V did. I missed you...felt so empty without you. I felt bad for leaving things the way they were," the dark voice whispered.
Namjoon just stayed quiet. From what he knew, Taehyung didn't like him in that sense. He loved him dearly as a friend. V was the one who loved him as something more. Who had fallen for him. Not Taehyung. Not the one that Namjoon truly liked.
So seeing Taehyung act like this was...odd and unusual because it was definitely unexpected. Then again Taehyung didn't know V had told Joon that he had absolutely no romantic interest in him.
But Joon was surely not complaining.
"Missed you, Tae," Namjoon whispered back. Taehyung pulled away and reached for another one of Namjoon's drinks, drinking it and pressing his lips to Namjoon's, parting his lips. Namjoon also parted his lips and felt the cold liquid transfer over to his mouth, his tongue savoring the taste of his boyfriend and alcohol.
Taehyung pulled away and licked at Namjoon's bottom lip. Grinning. "Tonight is all about us. Let's make the most of it."
"Of course," Namjoon slurred, drunk off of Taehyung, not the alcohol.
The two began mingling around, dancing with each other, grinding to the thumping beats of the music that blared through the building. Namjoon gripped Taehyung's hips and pulled him closer, breath tickling Taehyung's ear. Taehyung stared at him with grave eyes, one hand on his shoulder while the other gripped the nape of his neck.
"You're making me sweat," Taehyung hummed.
"You're making me wet," Namjoon goofily joked and Taehyung laughed.
"You're drunk."
"Am not. You're drunk," Namjoon shot back,
"I'm not drunk, idiot," Taehyung chuckled, both hands sliding down Namjoon and resting on his hips, fingers looping through the belt loops of his jeans, pressing their crotches against each other. Namjoon let out a weak moan and relaxed his forehead against Taehyung's shoulder. "M' not- can't right now, tae."
"I'll treat you good, baby.. You know that, right, pumpkin?" Taehyung whispered, kissing his chin. Namjoon wrapped his arms around Taehyung's shoulders, drunk to the fact that what was being said was something Tae would never say. All these nicknames...the teasing. The only nickname the male gave him was my sweetheart. And lovely on one of his good days....
But it was oblivious.
He was drunk.
"M'know. Don't worry." He grinned and kissed Taehyung deeply and Taehyung happily complied, molding their lips together. Namjoon gripped the long collar of his shirt and smiled against his boyfriend's lips.
"Namjoon?"
The two pulled away to spot a man with plump lips, back pressed to some stranger, hands resting on his hips as they stopped in mid-dance. Namjoon gulped and his mouth went dry, eyes widening as he glanced at Taehyung, who's brow seemed to be lowered in anger.
"Jin?"
"Huh. See you two actually are...good. Thought you were lying earlier."
"You two were together earlier?" Taehyung questioned and Jin shook his head as the guy behind him grinded against his ass.
"Not really. I dropped off a present from a mutual. That's all."
"Ah..." Taehyung's grip loosened around Namjoon and he raised a brow. "I'll go get us some more drinks."
"I can go with-"
"You're drunk enough you can barely stand. Just wait here, buttercup, okay?" Taehyung grinned and walked off, leaving Namjoon to just watch as Jin grinded against another guy. He felt mad. Why? Because his crush was about to get fucked on the dance floor if someone didn't intervene.
"Didn't expect you to take a liking to blondes."
Jin shot him a glare and pressed his hand against the stranger's chest. "He has a big dick. Why wouldn't i?"
"Is that your type, Jin?" Namjoon hummed as he raised a brow. "Cute and big dick? Hm?"
Jin glared at him. "Fuck you," he pointed, dragging the stranger to another section of the club. Namjoon took a step to follow, wanting to make sure Jin was okay but Taehyung returned with drinks, handing one to Namjoon with a scowl.
Sorry if it's strong. Didn't know what you wanted."
"You know what I like-"
"True," he chuckled, waiting for Namjoon to drink his beverage.
The night started to turn into one big blur. The flashing lights confused Namjoon and the thumping music started to hurt his head. He was sweating, pink hair sticking to his forehead even though he was seated on a barstool, not moving a muscle other than to down another drink.
Taehyung licked his lips and stared at Namjoon as he stared off into space, lips parts and eyes tired and droopy. Taehyung reached out and grabbed Namjoon's wrist. "You're so beautiful, princess. So pretty....I want you."
"Tae~" Namjoon hummed, cupping his cheek and kissing him. "M'want you."
"Let's go back home."
Namjoon nodded and held onto the shorter male as he dragged him out of the crowded place, standing outside and letting the air hit their faces. Taehyung called a taxi and helped the other get inside and Namjoon plopped down onto the seat, letting Taehyung crawl in next to him.
"Gonna be inside me tonight? Or am I gonna fuck you?" Namjoon slurred, swaying back and forth despite sitting down. Taehyung just stared at him with a cold gaze before grabbing his hand.
"You're too drunk tonight," Taehyung cooed out, sounding a little...forced. But Namjoon was too intoxicated, high, to even notice. When the Taxi stopped Taehyung paid him and carried Namjoon into the apartment, opening the door and walking in. he kicked it closed with his foot, then slammed Namjoon into the wall, a growl erupting from him as his eyes were set in stone, the cold, icy stare definitely freezing him in place.
"I'm fucking you tonight, Namjoon."
Namjoon lazily stared at the man. ".....not Taehyung."
"What makes you say that?" he spat, sinking his teeth into Namjoon's neck, causing him to buck his hips and moan softly.
"Tae doesn't swear. V-V, please," Namjoon whined, gripping his shoulders. V just stared down at him with glossy eyes. The grey-haired male was feeling more emotional than he had in years. It scared him how vulnerable Namjoon was. How vulnerable he got for Taehyung and him. He cupped both of his cheeks and his sadness and worry were replaced by anger.
"You'll never be able to stay with him now, Joon."
"V...?" Namjoon moaned as V gripped his clothed cock.
"Never....he'll be mine whether you're alive or not," the other whispered, voice oddly lighter in tone than it normally was for V. He sunk his teeth into Namjoon's skin again, making Namjoon moan and not register the angry slurs from the other. V was too conscious. And he would think part of him would hold him back.
But, no, it didn't. The rage, anger, and disappointment in him overwhelmed all other emotions, flushing them down the drain. He gripped Namjoon's thighs and lifted him up. Namjoon instinctively wrapped his legs around V's waist and V took one last look at his face.
"God, I hate you." He pressed their lips together and hummed at the taste while Namjoon tugged at V's hair, nudging him to the room. V took him there swiftly and tossed him onto the bed, removing his button-up and jeans, revealing his semi-hard cock in his boxers. Namjoon only licked his lips, scanning V as he unbuttoned his own shirt. He saw double, one stable V and a slightly blurred one that was out of focus.
He tried his best focus on the bare chest that came into focus. V was never the one to have hard abs, and Namjoon never blamed him. It was Taehyung's wish. After the incident years ago, Taehyung said he preferred staying in shape but he didn't want to have the body of a swimming suit model. V agreed. He said it would be too hard to maintain.
V had a hard, flat chest, no abs but his body was toned with slight belly fat that was hardly noticeable unless you grabbed it with your fingers. And Namjoon actually preferred V to have that body. He was comfortable to hold and cuddle, not having to deal with leaning against a hard rock chest or a very squishy one, either.
Namjoon reached up and placed a hand on V's heart as V was trying to remove his pants. His dark eyes flicked down as Namjoon caught his attention. Namjoon opened his mouth to say something but his words were caught in his throat when V grabbed the hand on his chest and pinned it above Namjoon's head. Namjoon laced his fingers with V's and used his other hand to grab the back of his neck. V stared into Namjoon's eyes before doing the same thing, pinning both hands above his head.
"Let me-"
"Don't touch me," he whispered softly, eyes shut tight. "Please don't touch me, Namjoon."
Namjoon just nodded, too drunk to think about anything other than getting laid.
Usually, Taehyung and V would be the 'top' in their sexual lives. There was just something so comforting about it that Namjoon enjoyed. In other relationships or hook ups, Namjoon was always in one on top or who called the shots.
But with the way Taehyung and V were, so gentle and caring, it made Namjoon feel like he could finally relax and have someone else take care of him for once. It wasn't a consistency for a certain person to top, though, the other just usually took it. For some part. it was pretty fair between the two.
The last time they had a sexual encounter was a month before V left for the tour, and that night V stuck to his usual and kept the position he was mainly use to. So the feeling of being dominated after a while felt weird to Namjoon, especially in this scenario. But that didn't mean he didn't want it. He missed the sense of comfort.
Even while masturbating he'd just jack off without fingering himself. Just fist his dick while thinking about V under him, grasping the sheets of his bed while letting out his deep grunts and groans.
It's something that Namjoon was fond of when it came to their sex life. When V bottomed he didn't change and act so submissively or bratty. He acted like himself, the same he'd act if he was topping him.
Those were the kind of guys Namjoon enjoyed. He didn't want someone whining and being bratty beneath him. He wanted someone who could also act aggressively while bottoming and V was the definition of that.
Taehyung, on the other hand, was someone he rarely had sex with and it made sense since the boy didn't actually like him; didn't like guys. He did once or twice, but both times Namjoon was forced to be a bottom in the situation without a say like V would give him. He didn't mind, though, since he loved Tae.
V's hands slid away from Namjoon's hands to his hips, one sliding further and pulling his boxers off. Namjoon laid nude beneath V, staring up at him, pink strands of hair sprawled across the bed and his forehead. His pupils were blown and lips were parted, his dimples faintly showing.
The other bent down and buried his face in Namjoon's neck, nuzzling him. His breathing was slow and controlled while Namjoon's was heavy and fast even though he was just laying down. Limp. V pulled away and pulled out a condom from his pocket.
V studied his face for a moment and gulped, looking away and fumbling with his pants, pulling them off along with his shirt and boxers. He pressed himself in between Namjoon's legs, one hand pulling on the condom and the other resting next to Namjoon's head. Namjoon felt his eyes fluttered shut when warm lips came in contact with his jaw, his breath hitching.
"Joon," V whispered. Namjoon reopened his eyes to see how close their faces were. V's nose brushed against Namjoon's as his hand cupped his cheek. Both eyes flicked from Namjoon's left eye to his right before nodding. "Keep your eyes open for me, okay?"
Namjoon just nodded and V frowned, letting an inaudible curse slip from him. "Can you say 'yes, V'?"
Namjoon opened his mouth and nuzzled his hand. "Yes, Tae..."
He gulped and nodded, glancing down and wiping some lube from the condom onto three of his fingers. One finger didn't show to have any effect on Namjoon for he just squirmed. V took this as an okay to slide a second in, causing Namjoon to flinch and breathe through his mouth, eyes fluttering. "Does it hurt?"
"No," Namjoon whispered, reaching to wrap his arms around him but soon retracting, remembering how V told him not to touch him. Two fingers slowly pressed against velvet walls that constricted around him, pulling him in when V tried pulling them out.
Namjoon's hands were cluelessly playing with the sheets, mouth hanging open. His eyes were hooded when he felt a third finger push its way inside.
Namjoon groaned and closed his eyes, letting his head roll to the side just as his hips bucked, cock leaking onto his stomach as the fingers pumped in and out of him. Namjoon let out strained grunts, the sounds trying to push their way out of the tight throat that was trying to suppress them. "V-V-"
V looked at Namjoon's face and grunted, slamming his fingers inside of him.
"Oh~" Namjoon's eyes flew open and he gasped, his head pushing into the covers more. V began thrusting three fingers in and out of Namjoon, his eyes fluttering every so often as he hit a bundle of nerves easily.
It wasn't hard for V to find it. He was very familiar with Namjoon's body and all of his sweet spots.
"V-V-!" Namjoon moaned, V pulled his fingers out and sat up, positioning himself near Namjoon's entrance. The older male let out an airy chuckle as he felt the hard member rub against his hole, instinctively pushing against him.
V held Namjoon's face with one hand and pressed their lips together, giving him a sweet kiss and, in the moment, Namjoon felt nothing but pure bliss and he couldn't tell if it was the effects from the alcohol or the effects of his love for V resurfacing. He was so soft and kind towards the older one. Always making sure he was safe. Okay. Comfortable.
Just like how he always was.
He was so sweet and kind and gentle with him, then with everyone else he was hard and cold. It made Namjoon feel special because he was treated differently. Taehyung didn't treat him different, though, he treated him like he would a fanboy for fan service.
The kiss had so much passion in it and when V's tongue pushed into his mouth he could taste the last drink V had before they left.
Their tongues moved in sync and earned a few muffled moans from Namjoon. This was what he wanted. To be in a nice relationship, to have these kisses with the one he loved every day and night or after every fight and argument. The enjoyment from it sent chills down his spine and-
"!!-"
Pain snapped Namjoon from cloud nine and he opened his mouth, exhaling heavily. His hands gripped V's shoulders and his head lifted. He pressed his forehead to V's and opened his eyes to see V staring right back at him, forehead damp and hair sticking around his face.
The stretch from three fingers to V's dick was....massive, in a way. The hard shaft pushed through Namjoon's tight walls, going in slowly. V knew how tight Namjoon Would be and he didn't want to rush this. Didn't want to rush their night..
When he was buried in Namjoon he pushed his hips against Joon's even more, sliding him up the bed, letting his knees hold him up while his hands pried Namjoon's from his shoulders. He held them tightly in his and pinned them above his head, staring at his face one Namjoon fell back. "Please, Joonie..." V whispered, and it almost sounded like a desperate plea of some sort, like he was asking for help. But help with what?
"I'm fine now," he croaked out.
V inhaled sharply and pulled his hips back, his cock dragging against Namjoon's tight walls before he pushed back in, shakily exhaling. Namjoon whined at the push and pull, almost feeling like his stomach would flip inside out if V kept pressing so hard against him.
V's grip tightened on Namjoon's hands as he started up a smooth rhythm, hips rolling into Namjoon's at a reasonable pace, making Namjoon breathlessly moan out his name, straining to keep his eyes open.
He did find it weird that V was so persistent on him keeping his eyes open and it was really hard to do so. He didn't feel tired but, despite feeling pleasure in his lower half, his body was still tingling and had that numbing feeling to it.
At first, it was only near his lower abdomen but at this point it had traveled all the way to his head, making the bliss he was feeling double in a way.
"Sh-shit-" Namjoon slurred as he moved his hips against V's. "-ah...harder-"
"Joon, I don't wanna-"
"Not gonna hurt me, baby."
V huffed and released his hands, placing them both on Namjoon's waist. His thumbs rubbed circles against his skin while he gripped him tightly, pumping his cock in and out of the taller man beneath him as sweat started coating his bare back. Namjoon yelled out and fisted the sheets, his breathing hard and ragged as he rolled his hips against V, feeling the swollen head push against his prostate.
"V-"
"Namjoon," V breathed sternly, trying to compose himself from the immense pleasure. Namjoon stared at V's face and saw how it twisted in pleasure, brows relaxed and turned upwards towards the center, lips parted and eyes glazed. But something about the emotion in his eyes was...different. They weren't as soft or as caring and they even seemed to be a little angered.
And that color....
"!!!" When Namjoon's mind finally felt the numbing effect leave, something else seemed to strike him, causing him to feel dizzy. He closed his eyes again and wrapped his legs around V's waist, pulling him in deeper with a lewd moan that escaped his throat.
"Namjoon...eyes," V husked out but Namjoon just shook his head.
"Hurts."
V slowed down his thrusts and stared at him before Namjoon grunted.
V frowned and looked away, letting out a dry tsk while shaking his head and almost immediately speeding up his pace, slamming into the poor man beneath him, who moaned loudly, letting his smooth voice utter stammered curses and slurred words from the immense pleasure.
Namjoon cracked open his eyes and looked down, feeling sweat cover his abdomen. Eyes grew when he saw it wasn't sweat and that he, what looked like, came multiple times on himself.
Fuck, he was feeling overstimulated and felt his insides burn along with the sting that seemed to crawl under his skin, irritating his body.
He made a sound of protest that was barely audible and went to sit up. But he couldn't. He was frozen and couldn't move, his arms and legs feeling heavy and it was then that he noticed his legs had unhooked themselves from V's waist and were now laying on the bed.
Fear struck him but he tried his best not to let it bother him and instead continued to moan, trying to feel the pleasure rather than the pain. But when he went to speak and warn V of him cumming again his throat tensed and no words came out.
That same fear he was trying to push away came back within seconds and it was the only thing he could think of. He couldn't move. And it was hard for him to breathed. His eyes were big and crazed, trying to tell the other what was wrong but he didn't have to.
V panted and stared at Namjoon's face with guilt written all over, his eyes not leaving Namjoon's scared eyes. Namjoon was so scared not being able to feel anything. He didn't even feel pain anymore. The only feeling he had was V inside of him, the small spurts of pleasure making him twitch.
"...B...Ah...V," Namjoon shakily stuttered, trembling as he inhaled, feeling enormous amounts of pressure on his chest. V nodded and stopped his thrusting, leaning forward and kissing Namjoon's nose. "C-an...V...brea...the...breathe," he cried out, a tear sliding down his cheek.
V suddenly stopped and the look on his face changed as he pulled out of Namjoon, staying in between his legs as elbows framed Joon's head. V's hands raked through Namjoon's pink hair as he touched their foreheads together, still nodding his head.
"I know," he whispered in a rush. "I know. Keep your eyes open for me, yeah?"
"V-V-...V"
"Namjoon, talking will make it worse. Don't talk." The aggravation in his voice startled Namjoon. V would never talk to him like that.
The older one Trembled as the one above him shuffled around, holding his face in his palms as he sat on the edge of the bed.
"V-V-"
"Why...why the fuck did you do it???? Why?? Why why why why do you always take people from me," V whispered out, voice sounding gruff and cracking with emotion. He looked over at Namjoon as he mumbled his name again, and he went close to him.
His eyes still had that hard look in them as they turned hesitant before he spoke, "Shh...It'll be okay."
Taehyung stood up and looked around the room, rummaging through drawers and the jacket he had brought with him, only finding some bagged wipes and a pair of black gloves that were wrapped in a black mouth mask.
At hearing the worried cried from the other Taehyung went back to the bed, holding Namjoon's face. One of his hands grabbed Namjoon's hands and held them, squeezing them. "Can you feel it? Are you cold? Can you feel me squeeze your hands?"
Namjoon couldn't even shake or nod his head and he just blinked, staring blankly at Taehyung as tears made their way down his cheeks. Taehyung hissed and kissed Namjoon's lips, whispering against them. "No No, don't cry. You're going to be fine. You're going to be okay. Just try to breathe slowly." He placed Namjoon's hands on his heart. "Feel that? Feel how fast it's beating? Focus in it. It'll help with the pain."
Namjoon tried to listen to Taehyung but he couldn't' comprehend much of what was being said to him as he breathed rapidly, his breath getting caught in his throat every so often. His skin was becoming hot and slightly red and he started sweating.
As a drop of sweat landing in his eye, he shut them both tightly and Taehyung whimpered. "Joon. Joon, I need you to keep your eyes open," he cooed, wiping the tears from his face along with the sweat. "C'mon, I need to know if you're awake."
With much force, Namjoon's eyes cracked open, looking pale and lifeless as he breathed in and out shakily, chest seeming to convulse with each intake. Taehyung's hands ran through Namjoon's hair to soothe him and he shook his head. "You'll be okay. As long as you stay awake it won't hurt as much."
"T-t-tae-hyung-"
"I'm right here."
The pain was subsiding and the numbing effect was slowly fading. He held his breath for a few seconds to force his arm up, reaching to touch Taehyung's cheek. He caressed it with trembling fingers, his arm already sore from all the muscle straining going into holding it up.
"Taehyungie-" he whispered. Taehyung rapidly nodded and wasted no time in kissing Namjoon, holding him in place as one hand gripped the hand touching his face.
"Thirsty-" Namjoon whimpered and Taehyung just stared at him before pulling away, sitting on the edge of the bed again in silence.
Namjoon laid there, trying to get his thoughts together but his mind still seemed to be in shambles. When he tried thinking about something other thoughts immediately occupied his brain, not allowing there to be any freedom in his thinking. But one thought that he was able to hold onto was something Taehyung had said.
He tried to stop him.
Was V trying to kill him?
He coughed and looked at the other who looked back with a frown. He went close to the man and caressed his cheek, a hard glare settled on his face.
The look in his eyes changed and the ligthness seemed to dim as panic overtook the silver haired beauty, gasping as he gripped the sides of Namjoon's face. "Joon? Oh my god- Joon, can you talk? Hey, Joon-"
"mm.."
Taehyung's eyes turned more worried than they had been the entire night, and tears pricked the corners of his eyes, bottom lip quivering. "Pumpkin-" his voice cracked as he crawled off the bed, hurriedly pulling on pants before gently picking Namjoon up bridal style, holding him close. "You're still warm...Okay. Okay. Okay, come on. I need to get you to the doctors. I can still make it, it's not too late." He adjusted himself so Namjoon settled his chin on the other's shoulder, Taehyung's arms holding him against his chest.
"I-I'm so sorry," he sobbed, sounding rushed as he held Namjoon close against him.
"T...tae.."
"Shhh...No no. It's not- don't think that. It's me, pumpkin," the grey-haired male whispered, hands now caressing Namjoon to try and soothe him. "I-I'm so sorry. So sorry- I-I tried stopping him, Joon, I tried. Please just keep your eyes open, please.
"....Nnn..."
"I'll-I'll call Hoseok to meet us there so he can help us- at the hospital. I'll call him. I'll-" he seemed to be in a sudden pain as he cringed, phone slipping from his hand and his grip on Namjoon tightening, his body quivering as he let out a choked sob. He almost dropped Namjoon as he tried to gripped his hair, gasping in pain.
His body twitched and went still, and in a slow motion he laid Namjoon back onto the bed. Dark brown eyes looked at Namjoon, and the older one couldn't believe it. Was he wrong. Was it the other who was trying to kill him?
"You'll be okay as long as I'm by your side. You'll be okay. And I won't leave you."
'I want those eyes' Namjoon thought as he tried struggling. 'Those beautiful light brown ones. Not these ones. Please...This isn't right.'
The male picked up the phone and tossed it out of the room, crawling back onto the bed and pulling the covers up and over both of them, one hand gently rubbing Namjoon's head. The pink haired male wanted to shriek our for help, to tell the other he was hardly able to breathe and needed help, needed to go to the hospital, to yell for the other to get away from him.
But the silver haired male didn't seem to pay him attention. He turned facing away and just left Namjoon their, gasping for air. His lungs felt like they were on fire and like he had been inhaling smoke, the stinging slowly starting to crawl up his throat and REALLY making him feel like he was suffocating. Small wheezing left him, and his entire body turned numb.
Vision blurred as he tried looking around only to catch himself staring up at the dark ceiling, the covers hugging his body. Hallucinations were next from the lack of oxygen, and he could feel the blankets wrapping around him more in a tight hug. Images flashed before his mind and he wanted to latch onto a certain one to go back to that day.
Where there was V, not Taehyung, and the two were seated at a park near the pond.
V was leaning in the bench and Joon rested on his lap just staring at the man. And those soft brown eyes; so light and mesmerizing.
No words were exchanged for multiple hours. And it was comfortable.
And just by sitting there, he knew V loved him just like he said he did. Exactly like he said he did. Even though once they left the park, there were no exchanging of words. Just a look, a nod, and a departure.
It was towards their fall out, a week after Namjoon had confessed he had feelings for someone else. That day he wanted to tell V he still loved him. That he was the one he was currently choosing over the other because he didn't want to give it up.
During their fight there was yelling and words thrown. And at the end, with balled fists and angry tears in his eyes, V had told Namjoon that he loved him. But Namjoon didn't reply, feeling confused. And he left.
He never replied it back, not for 10 months.
And he wanted nothing more than to tell him he loved him back. It was Namjoon's fault they left on bad terms. Because he walked out and didn't talk to him face to face for months, only over the phone.
The image seemed to become a reality he was stuck in and he found himself staring up at beautiful features as wind blew, moving the silver hair around. Namjoon could almost feel the breeze, and the soft blow felt smooth against his face. He blinked, watching as V breathed slowly.
He moved around and saw V hitch a breath, eyes straining from looking down.
"V," Namjoon choked out. The other made a sound of acknowledgement but didn't look at him. The older used a weak hand to grab his shirt gently. "I love you."
V was quiet before looking down at Joon with those light brown eyes, so caring and loving, and his rare boxy smile- one he would only ever show Namjoon- appeared as he grabbed Namjoon's hand, thumb rubbing it.
"I know you do. I love you, too."
'I told him. I finally told him I loved him. He knows he loves me. He knows.......I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.' Namjoon choked softly as the image wavered and his entire world went black and cold.
'I was so blind-'
•••
"So. You'll be able to finish any task we give you, right? There won't be any more emotional connections...correct? We can't have another case of you and RM happening."
"You have my word," V muttered as he sat upright in the comfy chair across from the man in the suit who wrote down some things on the paper.
"Good. It would be a shame to lose our best idol and worker." The man slid the paper across the table to V. "Now do you understand why we, at Bighit, don't allow dating? And don't worry. No officials will see you didn't finish off Namjoon and that boy. It'll be our secret. I'll write it off."
V looked down at the paper he was about to sign, eyes scanning the words right above the blank box.
Task 93: ON HOLD SIGNED BY W. JACKSON
Task 94: Finished KT
Task 95: ON HOLD SIGNED BY W. JACKSON
ABOVE TASKS HAVE BEEN TERMINATED BY IDOL OF CHOICE OR REMOVED BY MANAGER OF CHOICE. CONTRACT RENEWAL FOR IDOL V HAS BEEN APPROVED BY MANAGER WANG JACKSON AND WILL FINISH ANY MISSING TASKS FROM MID-NOVEMBER TO THE END OF NOVEMBER/BEGINNING OF JANUARY. OFFICIAL CONTRACT SIGNING OF RENEWAL WILL TAKE PLACE IN JANUARY.
IDOL SIGNATURE X: VKT____
ABOVE TASKS HAVE BEEN TERMINATED BY IDOL OF CHOICE OR REMOVED BY MANAGER OF CHOICE. MANAGER WANG JACKSON HAS APPROVED CONTRACT TERMINATION FOR IDOL KIM TAEHYUNG. ALL TASKS UP TO THIS POINT WILL BE STORED IN CONFIDENTIAL FILES FOR FUTURE PURPOSES AND REFERENCES. PLEASE SEE OFFICIALS AND ASSIGNED MANAGER FOR ANY QUESTIONS CONSIDERING SAID IDOLS TERMINATION.
IDOL SIGNATURE X: _________
V stared down at the paper and gulped as Jackson grinned, tapping his pen to the table. "So. You can guarantee he won't be a problem anymore?"
"That's what I said."
"Don't be a smartass, Kim." Jackson nodded towards V and the paper. "Taehyung has no control, right?"
V sneered at the man. "He never did."
Jackson only smirked at this. "demonstrate for me. How he has no control now. He has to sign his half of the paper, anyway. I know that it's going to be hard to push him back when he finds out he'll be terminated- but I'm excited to see how you'll take back control."
V nodded and stared at the paper. Not being the prey and being the Tiger had always been a wish from his grandma that was passed down to him. He created another persona, someone who could fit society standards, to become the tiger and not be prey.
But was it worth it.
This place?
This home?
His tiger persona was nothing to these people. Because his true self had become the tiger here. The biggest and baddest tiger in the music industry. In Seoul. In all of South Korea.
He no longer needed that side of him. Not the side who fit into society. Who could laugh and smile and joke. It was useless to him. He didn't need it. Because here?
Here, his original self was the tiger.