"Whilst the party is ongoing, I would like you to stay down here and clean up, I'll be cooking for most of the day, so I will need this kitchen spotless for the next day. After that, you can do whatever you see fit just make sure you stay down here. Clear?" Miss Jenkins said, not even looking up from her scribbling.
"Crystal," I replied, pinning my hair up with one final hairpin.
"I know this isn't the best of situations, but it's Miss Matilda's wishes and we cannot go against them."
"I understand. I don't mind staying down here, had she not demanded it, I may have suggested it myself."
Miss Jenkins didn't reply, she continued to lean over the table in the middle of the kitchen and scribble out the remaining items on the shopping list. I had been shaken awake early that morning to join Dr Ealing, Robert and Zachariah on a trip to London City in order to purchase whatever Miss Jenkins didn't have for the party. Why she had chosen me and not Esther was a mystery seeing as my reading wasn't particularly good and I would have to rely on someone else to make sure I was getting it right. I wasn't too keen on the idea of leaning on someone else to make sure I didn't make a mistake but, as I found out later, it was the only job I could have done that morning.
The party was to take place the next evening and Miss Jenkins was running herself ragged trying to make sure everything was perfect. When she had heard that Dr Ealing would be taking Zachariah to the City to buy Matilda a gift, she had jumped at the chance to ask if I could tag along in order to get her missing food items. I had not been told that I was going until that morning when I was woken at the crack of dawn and asked to get dressed. I was still bleary-eyed, half-asleep and wishing I was anywhere but standing in the middle of a relatively cold kitchen waiting for Miss Jenkins to hand me the list. Although the idea of being up so early wasn't ideal, I was glad to be getting out of the house for the first time since I had arrived.
"Make sure you get everything on this list if you can't read something, ask Robert. I can't change my menu so double check it before you get into the carriage. Here is the money." She handed me the list and a small bag of coins that rattled around. "It should be enough, but if not, Dr Ealing has gladly said he would cover whatever shortages there are."
"This is one thing I don't think I can get wrong," I said, smiling.
"We shall see. Dr Ealing should be waiting for you in the hallway, so I won't keep you. Just make sure you check the list and try not to get distracted too much, remember, you have a job to do."
Nodding in response, I tucked the list and the money into the pocket of my apron and left the kitchen, taking the stairs two at a time before stumbling out onto the landing. As I walked towards the front door, Miss Jenkins last words spun through my head at a rapid pace. She had been unhappy with me for listening to Robert playing the piano on the day I pulled Zachariah from the river and had been frustrated that I had paused for an hour to play with Charlotte. Although I knew that was what she was getting at, I couldn't help but wonder if my arm was causing her more hassle then it was me. All my jobs had to be worked around the burn and the bruising, even if that was starting to heal. If the Ealing's kept me on I would have been surprised, if Miss Jenkins had turned around and said she didn't want me, I wouldn't be surprised.
I hated how much the burn was ruining my life. It was like the foreman was haunting me, forever reminding me of the life I had hated for so long. All I wanted was to forget about him, forget about that life, but the burn stopped me from doing that. It was the burden I had to carry and the reminder I never wanted. Although it had been a few days since my dismissal, it felt as though I was never going to leave that life behind. It was always going to be part of me.
"I would give anything to still be in bed right about now," Robert groaned, his voice pulling me out of my thoughts. I watched as he skipped the last two steps and walking down the hallway towards me. With his eyes half open and his hair still sticking up from how he had been laying against his pillow, it looked as though he had only just woken up.
"You look as though you've only just woken up," I said, pointing at his messy hair and inability to keep his eyes open.
"You would be correct. I was having a marvellous dream in which I was eating several blocks of toffee and chocolate, who would want to wake from that? It was Father who had to ruin the moment and force me to get out of bed, though I protested as much as I dared to." He laughed. "I see you are to do the last minute grocery run for Miss Jenkins, normally it is Esther, so I wondered who would be doing it."
"Once again my arm is being more of a hindrance than a help. Since I cannot help set-up for tomorrow, I'm doing the groceries. Though my reading isn't the greatest, so it'll be a challenge."
"Well, I can help with that. I'm only going so I have something to do and don't get asked to help with setting up. Zachariah is the only one to not get a present for Matilda, so we can leave him and Father and get everything on your list. That way I will be doing something, and you have someone who can read the list, so nothing is missed."
"I suppose that is better then trying to guess what it says and getting something that is not on the list," I said, "if it wouldn't trouble you too much."
"Not at all. I would rather be buying groceries then waiting for Zachariah to make his mind up."
"If you insist," I said, knowing I couldn't argue against him.
I enjoyed spending time with Robert, it felt as though it was the only time I was able to be myself without having to worry about getting in trouble or having my position taken away. The only problem was, he had become the main source of distraction for me and I didn't want that to be the case any longer. I needed to prove myself worthy of a position and with my arm holding me back more then I would have liked, I had to start avoiding distractions, and Robert was one of those. Back at the factory, distraction didn't exist, and if they did, we had learnt to avoid them. A new environment meant new distractions and new ways to avoid them, I just had to figure out how.
After several minutes of nothing but the ticking of a distance clock, Dr Ealing appeared at the bottom of the stairs with Zachariah clinging to his hand. I had not seen Zachariah since pulling him from the river two days before, but as he passed, he gave me a toothy grin and a small wave. I followed the Ealing family from the hallway and outside where Samuel was waiting with the carriage I had arrived in. As I climbed in beside Robert, Samuel handed the reins of the horses over to somebody else and walked away, sending a little nod in my direction as he passed. I hadn't seen him since our first meeting, but I was glad I could still consider him a friend.
With all of us now on the carriage, the driver pulled down the gravel path, leaving the house behind. As we trundled down the country lanes and towards the city, I found myself once again gazing out the window, remembering how I felt the first time I had taken this ride. The first time I had travelled these roads towards the Ealing household felt like it had been a lifetime ago, even if it had only been a few days. I remembered the anxiety and apprehension that was running through my entire body as we left London, the fear of not knowing what the future was likely to hold for me. This trip was different. It was a chance to escape the work and be able to experience London from a different perspective, although that didn't stop the fear.
As we moved into the city, I felt my hands start to tremble and quickly shoved them into my apron pocket, grabbing hold of the money bag in order to try and stop the trembling. When the carriage came to a stop, the trembling in my fingers had calmed to the point I could remove them from my pocket without fear of someone noticing. Climbing out the carriage, I was met with the sounds of the busy London streets, the sounds I had only heard from a distance. They were selling loaves of bread, meats, milk, anything a person could want, they were selling. With any luck, I would be able to purchase everything I needed for Miss Jenkins.
"I'm going to take Zachariah to some of the shops a little further in the City. We will meet you two back here in exactly two hours, understood?" Dr Ealing said, taking a small pocket watch from his pocket and flipping it open to check the time.
"Understood. See you in two hours," Robert replied.
"Don't go getting yourself into any trouble!" Dr Ealing called as Zachariah dragged him away from us and into the crowds.
"We'll try," Robert muttered, knowing his father couldn't hear him. "Right, let's take a look at this list then, shall we?"
"Right." I fished around in my apron pocket and pulled out the list Miss Jenkins had given me, unfolding it and attempting to smooth out the paper before I handed it to Robert who quickly scanned over it with his eyes.
"It won't take us too long to get all of this. We should have some free time before have to meet Father. If we hurry that is."
"Where do we start?"
"I propose we get the almonds first, they're Matilda's favourite and she will throw a fit if we don't have them."
"Lead the way."
Robert took the lead and led me through the confusing, winding streets of London. He had a knack for knowing just where everything was, which stall was where and where the best places were to buy what was on the list. Although he lived outside of the City, he seemed to know an awful lot about the streets and just how they worked. I was glad he had agreed to come along with me, had I been left to find these items for myself, I would have been lost within a matter of minutes. London was a confusing city and it was easy to get lost in if you didn't know the way. Luckily, Robert did and he was also remarkably well at getting sellers to decrease their prices if we brought enough of the item. By the time the list was completed, we had more almonds and flour then we needed.
Within an hour and a half of the two-hour time limit, everything on Miss Jenkins list had been brought and with time to spare, Robert decided to show me a little more of London. He took me through back alleyways that spilled out onto bigger streets lined with shops selling all sorts of items. From pens to notepads, books to dolls, these shops sold everything, and I wanted nothing more than to get my hands on something and own it for myself. It had been seven years since I had had something I could call my own, an item I wanted rather than needed. I hoped that one day I could have an item I could call my own. Something that really belonged to me.
After showing me some of the shops, Robert and I spilled out onto another street and that was when I saw it.
For the first time in days, I saw the building that had been my home for seven years of my life. I saw the building that hit the factory, the red-bricked structure that was protected by a metal fence. Behind that building, behind the lies, was the factory. It was where my friends were working in dangerous conditions for a man who only cared about the money. I was on the outside, I was free, but my friends were still suffering and there was nothing I could have done about it. I wanted to run up to that gate, to break it down take Isabel, Suzanna and Lucy away from it all, to show them that not everyone is bad. Only I couldn't. I could only look on knowing what was going on behind those iron bars.
I had always said I would protect Isabel, everything I did I did for her. That had ended the moment the Foreman had thrown me from those gates. I was on the outside with no way of getting in and she was unprotected. After seven years, I had failed to do the one thing I promised I would.
"Are you alright?" Robert asked, his hand on my upper arm pulling me out of the thoughts.
"Fine, just lost in my own head, I suppose," I replied, turning my back on the factory.
"That happens an awful lot. You know, if you ever need to talk about anything, I will listen without telling anyone else. You can trust me."
I wanted to tell him there and then. To confess everything I had been keeping inside for the past few days, but I didn't. I couldn't bring myself to admit the truth, not even to Robert. Had he asked, I would tell him about my family, about the mess that landed me on my own but my life in the factory was an area I was not willing to fall into. There was a time and place for that story, and it had yet to arrive.
"I will keep that in mind, thank you. For now, I suggest we make our way back to meeting place, we wouldn't want to be late," I said.
"I suppose you're right. You are starting to be a better influence on me then I would like, Rosie," Robert said, laughing to himself.
"Maybe that's not such a bad thing."
"Hmm, I'm sure Mother and Father would agree with you." He paused. "Don't tell them I said that. In fact, don't tell them that I actually did what I was told for once, they'll expect it on a regular basis and I don't think I can keep that up."
"Don't worry, your secret is safe with me."
"It better be," Robert said, a serious tone to his voice. He followed it up with a grin before nodding towards the street we had just come from. Taking one last glance back towards the factory, I turned and followed Robert through the maze of streets and back to the carriage where Dr Ealing and Zachariah were waiting for us.
The whole ride back to the house, I couldn't shake the thoughts of seeing the factory for the first time since my dismissal. I had been so close to the building, so close to my friends, but there was nothing I could have done to help them. Deep down, I felt like I had betrayed them. Since being dismissed I had had the opportunity to tell someone, to let someone know just what was happening behind those gates. I didn't. I could have told anyone I had met. I didn't. That day, I stood just meters from the gate, just a small distance away from my friends whose lives were at risk, and I did nothing. The idea that I could have helped played on my mind on the way back to the house and I couldn't shake the feeling that something bad would happen because I hadn't said anything.
Throughout the carriage ride, I felt Robert's eyes glance at me occasionally, though he didn't speak. When the carriage came to a stop and we climbed out, I went to grab the two baskets from the floor of the carriage only to have one grabbed by Robert who sent me another smile. I grabbed the other with my left hand and followed Robert, Zachariah and Dr Ealing into the house where Dr Ealing and Zachariah disappeared towards the parlour and Robert and I headed down to the kitchen where Miss Jenkins was waiting for us. She regarded Robert with a tilt of her head and furrowed eyebrows before checking the items in the baskets against a second list she had written.
"Well, it seems you got everything I asked you to get, and more," she said.
"We managed to get money off if we brought more," Robert said. "Might I had, Rosie's reading isn't actually that bad, it could do with some fine-tuning, but she has the basics."
"Is that so? I may send you on our grocery runs in the future, Rosie, though you will have to prove to me that could read the full list before I let you go on your own."
"You might be better off sending Esther, I wouldn't have known what half of this was if it hadn't been for Robert."
"I'll think about it. For now, you have chores to do."
"Before you give her a new task, I was wondering if I could have a word with Rosie about something, it won't take too long, I promise."
"Very well, but make it quick, we have a lot to do for tomorrow."
Robert placed his basket on the table and gestured for me to follow, taking me from the kitchen and up the staircase, to the room I shared with Esther. Throughout the climb, I wondered why he wanted to talk to me. Part of me wondered if he knew, if he knew that something wasn't quite right and that my reaction to seeing the factory was unusual. Part of me hoped that was it, that everything would come out. Only, I knew that wasn't likely to be the case. Another part of me thought I had done something wrong, that my comment in the kitchen had crossed some sort of line so he was going to tell at me. Neither of those were right.
"I have something for you," he said, coming to a stop in the middle of the room. "Do you remember how I asked you to wait outside whilst I went into one of the toy shops?"
"Yes," I said, unsure of where he was going with this.
"Well, I got you this." From his pocket, Robert pulled a small, dark brown teddy bear, just like one of the bears in the window.
"You shouldn't have spent your money on me."
"It's my money to spend on what I please. I saw how you were looking at those toys and I remembered how you had owned nothing when we met the other day and you still owned nothing. Charlotte had told me about the rabbit and how you had said you had something similar as a child. It might not be a rabbit, but it's something you can call your own."
"Really, you shou-"
"I won't take no for an answer. If you won't take it as a simple gesture, consider it a gift for saving my brother's life, no one really thanked you for that."
"Thank you, Robert," I said, taking the teddy bear and running my fingers over the soft fabric.
"You're welcome," he replied, sending me a warm smile.
I finally had something I could call my own, and I had Robert to thank.
~~~
A/N - We are back with our four consecutive update! I'm already working on Chapter Fourteen with the plan of uploading it on Sunday the 23rd since Christmas falls on a Tuesday! Watch out for that update in the coming days!
Anyway, we got more of Robsie! We seem to be getting a lot of scenes with the two of them recently, I'm not sure if it's accidental or my subconscious loves them too much xD. What about Robert getting her the toy? Sooo cute!
Comment below what you think!
Dedication - This chapter is dedicated to frjohnson who wrote a fabulous review of this book! It meant a lot :)
First Published - December 18th, 2018