(Flashback chapter:
Harry's first birthday with a flatmate,
Y/N realizes her feelings for him)
...
Harry hated birthday parties.
He didn't have a terrible childhood as everyone might assume, he just thought birthday parties were flashy. A bunch of people gathering around him to sing a stupid song while he must stand there like an awkward fool, waiting for the song to end to make a wish that would never come true. If that wasn't flashy, what was?
Harry's last birthday party was in third grade. And he couldn't remember what happened except for his parents inviting a bunch of kids from his class, most of whom didn't even like him and only showed up for free food. That was the reason Harry had sworn to let nobody know his actual birthday.
This took place a couple of months ago, it was Y/N's turn to do the laundry, and by accident, she found Harry's ID card in his pants pocket and discovered his date of birth. He didn't know that she knew and she wasn't planning on telling him. Otherwise, she wouldn't be able to throw him a surprise party which she had planned one month prior to the special day.
"Harry hates birthday parties. And he's gonna hate you for this." Niall stood with his arms crossed and his back against the fridge, watching Y/N struggle with flour and raw eggs to follow this birthday cake recipe she'd found online. She was practicing to make a real one for the party this weekend. Her last three trials had all failed miserably but she was never the kind of person who gave up so easily.
"If you think this is a bad idea then why are you helping me?" She grumbled. Her tongue stuck out from the corner of her mouth as she turned on the egg-beater to mix the ingredients in the big bowl, careful not to spill the mixture all over the counter like last time. Niall couldn't help but snort at how funny she looked.
"I want to see his reaction," he said.
"But you're his best friend. You should be the one to throw him a birthday party, not me!"
"Yeah, I'm his best friend and that's how I know he won't like this. I'm only helping you because there's free cake, and very likely, a pissed-off Harry."
Y/N rolled her eyes. She believed no one could hate his own birthday this much. Birthdays were supposed to be the most important events of one's life. She was always so excited about hers, just thinking of all the gifts and special treatments from her loved ones made her the happiest already. Maybe Harry had never properly experienced something like that, to realize how fun birthdays could be. Thus she determined to throw the best party ever for him, of course, with a little help from Niall.
Meanwhile, Harry was sitting in a coffee shop on campus, having no idea that his flatmate and best friend were secretly planning a surprise party for him. He had to study on a Sunday because there was an exam coming up, and he couldn't concentrate with Y/N breathing down his neck. She would either tell him stories he found no interest in, or nag him about doing chores and complain when he forgot. Harry didn't hate his flatmate, she could be fun occasionally. Sometimes when he'd had a bad day, listening to her dumb facts about whales during dinner actually boosted his mood. But that was just sometimes, most of the times, he found her annoying.
"Here's your drink."
The soft voice got Harry's attention, and his green eyes shifted up to see a pretty waitress. He'd come to this place many times before, but he had never seen her. He doubted he'd forgotten such an attractive human being.
"Are you new?" He spoke as the girl put his black coffee down right by his laptop.
"Yeah, this is my first day here." She gave him a flirty grin while he was sizing her up. She must love the attention, he assumed. Without waiting for her to go on, he introduced himself and asked for her name.
"Alyssa."
"Alyssa," he repeated, smiling as her fingers 'accidentally' brushed against his arm. She didn't need to tell him how much she wanted him to take her on this table. Her body language already gave herself away. As he watched her leave, there was only one thing on his mind: he needed to have her, one way or another.
Harry came back in the afternoon, looking very happy, which was unusual to Y/N. The first thing he would always say when he entered their flat was either "I'm tired" or "is there anything to eat?" So when he was this elated, there must be something wrong with him, or with the world. And so she had to ask. His reaction, however, wasn't something she could've seen coming.
"Why do you suddenly care about me?" He grumbled instead of giving her a proper answer. His eyes were glued to the phone, not sparing her a single glimpse.
"Just curious, that's all," she replied, indifferent on the outside, disappointed on the inside. She wished he knew she'd spent most of her Sunday in the kitchen, trying to figure out how to make him a cake. The least he could do was try not to be so rude. Oh well, he would find out eventually, until then, she would just have to tolerate.
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"Who's Y/N?"
Harry flinched when Alyssa mentioned the name, that was when he saw the text on his phone that said: We're out of eggs.
"I just bought some yesterday, did she really finish them all?" He muttered under his breath. For a second, he forgot that Alyssa had to ditch her shift to sit here with him. He should be talking to her, instead of writing a whole paragraph to tell Y/N that she should only consume three eggs a week. Even he couldn't explain why he must worry. When it came to Y/N, he just did.
"Is she your girlfriend?" Alyssa asked as she noticed the change in his expression. It was then that Harry put the device down, shaking his head. "No, she's my flatmate."
"So you're living with just her?"
"Yeah."
Although the girl said nothing else, Harry could guess what was on her mind. "There's nothing going on between us," he quickly added. If Alyssa thought he had feelings for Y/N, she wouldn't want to see him anymore, and he couldn't let that happen.
But her next comment was what he would never expect. "It's funny." She laughed. "A guy, and a girl, living together. You've never looked at her and wondered if it could be something more?"
Harry snorted as he shook his head no. Him and Y/N? Pssst. Only when pigs fly.
"I'd love to meet her," Alyssa said, causing Harry's eyes to grow wide. None of his past hookups had ever asked to meet his flatmate, so he wasn't sure how to respond. But on second thought, Alyssa wasn't another hookup. They hadn't had sex, and he was genuinely interested in her. He hated to admit, but he was expecting something more than just casual sex. Of course, he thought she was attractive and definitely still wanted to her naked in his bed. But she felt different from the others, and he'd like to see how far this would go.
"You can come to my flat sometimes, and I'll introduce you two to each other," he said after thinking twice, watching the smile grow on Alyssa's face.
"How about this Friday night?" She asked, and he agreed.
"Friday night it is."
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One week had passed in a blink of an eye, and Harry's birthday finally arrived.
Y/N placed the last candle on the cake she'd spent hours in the kitchen on making. She secretly prided herself on how it didn't look like a pile of vomit, nor taste like one. Now she couldn't wait to hear Harry's comment on it.
She knew he would go to that coffee shop to study like he'd been doing this entire week. So as soon as he left their flat in the morning, she got the ingredients ready, and phoned Niall to make sure there wouldn't be just the three of them at the party. When she finished preparing the food, she had to run out to buy the decorations. Of course, shedidn't get any help from his friends, so she had to decorate the flat all on her own. Her hard work did pay off though. Everything was now ready for Harry to come home.
She asked him when he would be back and he said at around 7 PM. Now it was 6:45, the guests were all here and Y/N was extremely nervous. She felt like she was going to war when it was just a party. She had thrown surprise birthday parties so many times before. What made his so different from the others? She would love to figure that out, but at a different time. Now she must make sure everything went as planned.
"Martin just texted me saying Harry is in the parking lot. He'll be here any minute. Remember not to make a sound, everyone! When he opens the door, we'll turn the lights on and shout happy birthday, okay?"
"Why are we here again?" A guy whispered to Niall, and Niall shushed him immediately. As soon as Y/N turned off all the lights, everyone got into their position and put on their party hats. Y/N stood right by the door with both hands on her heaving chest. She couldn't wait to see the look on Harry's face when he saw everything she'd set up for him.
The lift finally arrived and Harry stepped out, followed by Alyssa. He checked his phone but there was no message from his flatmate. He'd texted her about Alyssa coming over, and it wasn't like her to not reply in less than three seconds. Still, he didn't think much of it and assumed she was just busy making dinner or taking a shower.
"So before I meet Y/N, tell me a bit about her," Alyssa spoke up when Harry pulled out the keys.
"Well, I don't know," he murmured. Nobody had ever asked him this question before, so he had never thought of how he would answer it. "She's quite...annoying, I guess. She always speaks too much. Sometimes I only pretend to listen because I don't want to be rude. And she's very uptight, not someone I'd hang out with, you know what I mean?" He shrugged and turned the key. "I'm only living with her because she pays half the rent. If it weren't for the money, I-"
That sentence was forever unfinished because the first thing Harry saw when he opened the door was the hurtful look on his flatmate's face. The lights came on. Niall and many of his friends were standing in the living room with balloons in their hands. And there was a whole freaking cake on the table. This was a nightmare come true, but nothing could be worse than the look Y/N was giving him.
"Well, this is awkward..." Niall spoke but nobody paid attention to him. All the guests were waiting for Y/N's reaction to what Harry had just said about her.
"Y/N, I-" He stuttered, but she didn't want to wait for his insincere apology. She pulled off her hat, tossed it in a corner, and stormed off without a word to him. It took him two seconds to realize what had happened and hurriedly follow her
"Okay, the party's over! Get out everyone, get out!" Niall clapped loudly to get people's attention. Then he forced everyone out of the flat, holding the door open for them. "Trix, stay away from those cupcakes! Okay, fine, you can have one! Just one! Hurry! Jake, why are you still standing there? Move it! And you too, the pretty lady I've never seen before!"
Alyssa was probably the most confused when Niall kicked her out with the rest of the guests. But since Harry was nowhere to be found, she had no choice but to leave with the others. Niall was the last to go, after that, the flat became too quiet. Not even the fun and colorful decorations could tone down the gloomy atmosphere within the place.
Harry hesitated at the kitchen door as Y/N stood with her back facing him. She was cleaning the mess she'd left on the counter after making the cake. At first, he was just surprised, but soon guilt began to sink in. He didn't expect someone to even remember his birthday let alone spend time on doing all of this for him. What had he done for her in return? He'd talked shit about her to another person and embarrassed her in front of his friends. Now she didn't even want to look at him. It didn't just stop there though. It got much worse.
"Are-Are you crying?" Harry was terrified to see her shoulders tremble. "Y/N, I'm really sorry about what I said, I-I didn't mean it."
His flatmate finally turned around. And yes, she was crying. This was the first time he had seen a girl other than his sister or his mum cry, and no word was awful enough to describe this situation. He wanted to comfort her, to make her stop, yet he didn't know what to do but stand there, feeling like a piece of shit.
"I'll move out...so you can find a better flatmate if...that's what you want," Y/N sobbed into her palms. Her words made his chest tighten and freeze him to the spot.
"Of course that's not what I want. I said the stupidest things, but I meant none of-"
"I'm going to bed now," she cut him off and ran back to her room without a single look at him. When she slammed the door, he was still standing in the kitchen. Blood had drained from his face, and his heart was pounding so hard he forgot to breathe. What to do now? Should he knock on her door to beg for her forgiveness? Or should he wait outside for her to come out? Or should he do nothing and expect her to let this go? He didn't know the answer. All that he knew was that he'd fucked up.
Harry returned to the living room after what seemed like an eternity. In silence, he took a seat on the sofa, eyes on the birthday cake that Y/N had made for him. Sighing, he grabbed the lighter to light up one candle in the middle.
"Happy birthday, asshole," he mumbled to himself, then blew it off.
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The next morning, Harry waited right outside Y/N's bedroom door to greet her with a huge smile while wearing a birthday hat. He didn't expect much, but she gave him nothing at all, not even a twitch of her lips to show that she was amused. She stayed silent and pushed him aside as to head to the kitchen. For the first time, he followed her like a lost puppy.
Y/N stopped as she reached the door, startled to see the cake she'd made lying on the table. Harry, now standing next to her, spoke up fast, "I think it's not too late to celebrate my birthday."
She inhaled deeply, not looking at him. "I made that cake for you. Eat it alone."
"I can't. It's a huge cake!"
"I'm not eating with you. That's that."
As she attempted to walk, Harry immediately blocked her path, spreading his arms and legs so she had no choice but to face him. Y/N didn't give in, and neither did he. She moved to her right, and he shifted to his left. They shuffled back and forth a couple of times until she lost it and finally yelled at him. "Oh my God! How old are you? Six?! Get out of my way!"
"Please forgive me!" He clutched her shoulders before she could turn away. "You know I didn't mean what I said..."
"I don't care if you meant it, you still embarrassed me in front of your friends." Y/N pushed him off, crossing her arms as she furrowed her eyebrows at him. Harry hoped she wouldn't burst into tears again, otherwise, he'd have to dig himself a hole.
"You have no idea what I went through to throw you that party, Harry," she spoke at last. Her voice was small yet stern. "I spent the past week learning how to make a birthday cake, decorated the house on my own, I had to spend a lot of time with Niall."
"I told you I never celebrated my birthday. You didn't have to throw me a party..."
"I know." She nodded. "But I wanted to, and I started planning one month ago. I just thought...if I could make you feel special on your birthday, then maybe you wouldn't hate it so much."
As a response to Y/N's confession, a tiny oblivious smile spread across Harry's face. In that instant, he forgot that he looked silly in this birthday hat, that he was supposed to hate everything she had set up for him, including that birthday cake on the table. None of that mattered now that he had heard those words from her lips.
"Why are you smiling? I haven't forgiven you yet." Y/N's voice brought Harry back to reality. "I'm still extremely pissed at you!"
"How many times do I have to apologize?"
"Your apology won't make me feel better."
"Then what will?"
"This."
Right before he could question, she smashed a fistful of cake directly in his face and cracked up when he wiped away the frosting on his eyelids. But the sound of her laugh made everything better. He licked the cream on his lips and exhaled a chuckle. "Okay, I deserve this...am I forgiven?"
"Not yet!" Y/N cackled as she grabbed her phone and snapped a quick shot of him wearing a birthday hat and covered in cake. Despite the discomfort, Harry still posed for the picture with his iconic peace sign that she always made fun of.
"Now you're forgiven." She checked the photo, grinning like a Cheshire Cat and told him this would go on her Instagram. To be honest, she could send that photo to her whole contact list and he couldn't care less. The cheerful Y/N he knew had returned, and Harry hoped this time she wouldn't leave away ever again.
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"I think there's still a bit in my hair."
"You can wash it off later." Y/N giggled and wiped his chin one last time before tossing the paper towel into the bin at her feet. "Done. You're good to go."
"Thank you."
His response made her snort. "Why? I was the one who caked you."
"No, that's not what I meant." Harry swallowed, scratching the back of his head. "Thank you for throwing me a surprise party. That was very nice of you."
Those words sounded so simple, but as soon as he'd said them, his entire face turned scarlet. He looked away so she wouldn't notice. Little did he know, she was also blushing. This was the nicest they'd ever been to each other, so in no doubt, a 'thank you' was a big deal to them.
"Why did you say the things you said about me last night?" She asked after a moment of awkward silence and avoiding eye contact. Harry heaved a sigh, now he had to tell her the truth or else she'd continue to think he hated her.
"Remember the girl I brought home last night?" Y/N nodded. "Yeah, I've known her for a couple of days now. The other day she found out I was sharing a flat with you, and she suspected there was something going on between us. She didn't seem to believe me when I explained, so I had to convince her that I hated you. If I'd known you were behind the door, I wouldn't have said it...I was such a dick..."
Y/N couldn't decide which shocked her more, her flatmate admitting that he was a dick, or him possibly having feelings for a girl.
"Do you like this girl, Harry?"
"I don't know...Maybe."
"It's okay if you do. That's just human nature."
Harry quickly rose from his chair and told her he was done with this conversation. When he turned away, however, she stopped him immediately.
"There's one more thing. Stay put and I'll be right back!" She said with excitement and ran out of the kitchen, leaving him dumbfounded. Only twenty seconds later, she returned, this time, holding a new pair of socks, and not just any pair of socks, they were Batman socks!
"Happy birthday! These are for you!"
Harry scoffed when he saw them, almost bursting out laughing but he didn't want to hurt her feelings.
"Batman?" He grinned at her, making the poor girl flustered as her eyebrows knitted together. "You don't like them? Niall told me you're obsessed with Batman."
"Do I look like I'm obsessed with Batman? How many times do I have to tell you not to trust Niall?" He said with a chuckle, his heart fluttered when he saw her pouting face. The last thing he wanted was to disappoint her again, so he threw on a smile, tapping her nose lightly. "Thank you anyway. Definitely not gonna wear these, but at least you got me something."
"This is the last time I acknowledge your birthday, asshole." She scoffed and playfully hit him on the arm.
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A couple of days later, Y/N walked past a coffee shop and found Harry sitting with another girl. She'd only seen the girl once before, so she didn't remember her face. But even from the distance, she could tell that they were having fun. Were they on a date? The Harry she knew never went on dates. Y/N wasn't the kind to stick her nose in other people's business, but she couldn't help it this time. She ended up standing outside looking in for longer than intended. Harry was too busy paying attention to the pretty blonde to notice her. It took Y/N a moment, but eventually she figured it out. That was the one he'd brought back on his birthday.
They were laughing at something on his phone, and he looked so...happy. The same happy he'd been every time he came back from the coffee shop. And now Y/N knew why. She kept on staring at the two, trying to remember if he'd ever laughed that much when he was with her. No, he had never. And now she began to feel differently. Something inside her didn't seem right. Her fingers gathered into fists and the lumps in her throats made it impossible to breathe. She didn't know why, but she didn't like this at all.
Taking a deep breath, she quickly walked away, trying not to overthink, but her mind didn't want to let her off so easily. Now she couldn't stop comparing herself to that girl who was a thousand times prettier than she was. No wonder Harry liked that girl...
When Y/N got back to their flat, she couldn't rest as her insides were on fire. She was biting her nails and pacing back and forth in her room, trying to make sense of her own emotions, but she could not. She thought about what to say to him, or how she would act when he came back. But he didn't come back that night. He spent the night with the pretty girl. And for the first time since she moved into this flat, Y/N could barely sleep.
When he returned in the morning, she was in the kitchen making breakfast. It was weird to face him after all the changes she'd gone through in just half a day. She told herself act normal, but while trying too hard, her effort backfired. She ended up rambling on about meaningless things, which probably confused him even more than how excited she'd been to see him walk in.
"Are you high on coffee, Y/N?" He asked, making her blush.
"What are you talking about? I'm perfectly normal!"
Harry didn't believe it, yet he only flashed her a smile and changed the subject. "I'm having someone over tonight."
"Who?" Y/N asked right away, eyes widening. "Is it the girl you told me about?" Please don't be that girl. Please don't be that girl.
"No, I won't see her again."
"Why? I thought you liked her."
"I don't know." He gave her a shrug. "I thought I did, but after we slept together, I was instantly over it. I blame it on the coffee in that shop, it probably gave me hallucination. I'm never going there again."
Y/N couldn't help but chuckle. "It's not the coffee, idiot. Maybe deep down you were so desperate to know what it's like to like someone for real, your brain created hallucination on its own."
Harry squinted his eyes at her, thinking for a second before shaking his head. "Definitely the coffee."
Y/N rolled her eyes, but she actually felt relieved, and that was something else for her to worry about.
"Hey, need a ride to campus?" Harry's question pulled her back to reality. She blinked at him, raising an eyebrow when she realized what he'd just asked.
"Why?"
"I'm taking you."
"Just today or-"
"From now on," he said with a straight face. "But when I'm skipping class, you still have to take the bus."
"That means I'm still taking the bus almost every day then."
"Hey, at least be grateful," he said but couldn't hold back another smile. Y/N watched her flatmate walk out of the kitchen, and only then did she notice, the face of Batman on his socked feet.