- 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚌𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚀 & 𝙰 -
[ 𝓼𝓮𝓻𝓮𝓷𝓲𝓽𝔂 ]
𝐐 : if you could give one advice about love, what would it be?
𝐀 : make sure to love yourself first. grow with yourself, be with yourself through thick and thin, pick yourself up through the struggles and lift yourself higher at the celebrations. and only go into a relationship when you're ready .. ready to fall in love and give your all. welcome love with open arms but also keep a distance- be aware of the flaws, be aware.
𝐐 : if not jungkook, who would you want to get married to?
𝐀 : me myself & i
𝐐 : aside from jungkook, who do you think about the most?
𝐀 : namjoon [nods slowly] it's hard not having him in my future.
𝐐 : who do you think cared the most about you and why?
𝐀 : [hums, deep in thought] honestly yoongi because he never gave up on me, despite everything ... i know for sure that he would've done anything for me.
𝐐 : how's jungkook in bed ;))))
𝐀 : [whistles] too fine .. too bad you don't get to find out ;)
𝐐 : would you have taken yoongi back if jungkook or one of the other guys weren't there?
𝐀 : nope i would never take yoongi back, what we had wasn't right.
𝐐 : if you weren't with jungkook now, who would you think about taking back? (or being with at all in general)
𝐀 : none because the chapters of my life containing them all ended. but the ones who are still present are as my friends, my soulmates, simply because it's meant to be unfinished for us.
𝐐 : what are your personal views on love?
𝐀 : [lets out deep breath] big question thanks! [rests head on palm and thinks hard] love isn't everything everyone makes it out to be. at one point, i gave it too much importance and at one point i didn't. my view is that it's the most beautiful gift and it is an essential part of life .. but be careful of it's dark side- you know?
𝐐 : first of all, you're an angel. second of all, would you really say you 'loved' every one of the boys? if so— define love and if it's romantic or something else ... maybe how your feelings have changed as time passed for each boy?
𝐀 : you're an angel [blushes] that's a good question ... i wouldn't say i loved every single one of the boys. for example, Jin i don't think i loved, maybe i could have as a friend?
love to me is defined as a broad concept, it can be present in any relationship, it can vary .. whether that be family, friends, romantically with your partner- anyone, even a celebrity who doesn't know your name [winks]
and yes definitely! as time passed, my feelings did change for each person. for example, Jin i liked .. a lot but that soon turned into nothing because my feelings became negative. and with Hoseok, Taehyung, Yoongi and Jimin, i once felt romantically for them but those feelings have changed too.
𝐐 : who broke your heart the most?
𝐀 : yoongi [sad smile]
𝐐 : how did you deal with your emotions throughout high school? and how do you think it changed you as a person? (personally, i think it made you stronger as a person, emotionally and mentally)
𝐀 : i dealt with my emotions by pushing them away, avoiding them instead of confronting them .. which i do not recommend! [uneasy laugh] my experience of high school changed me, i think everyone changes in that period. i agree with you! i think it made me stronger, made me learn more about the different kinds of people, situations, the innocence of myself and the vulnerability of love.
𝐐 : how does it feel to know that 7 men once loved you uncontrollably?
𝐀 : sometimes i feel like i don't deserve what i had with all seven men. but i loved them, some i still do and i like to think they loved me too so .. it feels very valuable, because they all helped me to be Serenity and feel loved :)
𝐐 : what would have happened to you if you hadn't met Jungkook?
𝐀 : i ... shit [emotional] i would be waiting for something i need, all my life. Serenity would never have truly lived.
[ 𝓳𝓾𝓷𝓰 𝓱𝓸𝓼𝓮𝓸𝓴 ]
𝐐 : do you regret everything you did? would you go back in time to fix your mistakes? would you have expressed your feelings to serenity?
𝐀 : hm [looks at Serenity] i do regret most things because i made a lot of wrong decisions, when all i had to do was stay with the one person who was loyal to me. i could've saved myself a lot of toxicity that way. i would love to go back in time and fix my mistakes, confess my feelings- i'd sit with Serenity at the lonely lunch table, stay away from the dominant groups in high school and stick by her side by being there for her. it's now that i realise how much i wasn't there for her when we were broken teenagers.
𝐐 : was popularity that much for you to abandon things?
𝐀 : it was .. i'm not happy that it was but it happened [clicks tongue] i felt so alone in my teenage years that i thought i needed everyone. i wanted friends, to be known, to be in a group, but i should've realised that all i needed was one person. she was always a good influence.
𝐐 : what did you actually think when you read serenity's letter?
𝐀 : i thought that it meant something now, to her .. for us. and it terrified me because the way we are in the present is exactly how i want us to stay. the letter made our bond stronger [fighting!] but i'll never send mine, that's a no!
𝐐 : if things turned out different, could you have seen yourself with serenity?
𝐀 : maybe? [shrugs] there was a time where i saw us together romantically, but that was when i didn't leave her for materialistic desires, before i messed up. so if things turned out differently, then yes .. maybe we would've been together. we did both like each other.
𝐐 : was serenity your first love as you were hers?
𝐀 : she was mine, correct [forced laugh] but yoongi was always hers.
𝐐 : i know high school can change people but, how could you forget about your childhood best friend?
𝐀 : it happened without me even realising and you're all probably thinking- how stupid are you? but i was, i chose something of no value instead of Serenity and that shows how selfish i was- i never took her feelings into consideration.
𝐐 : are you still serenity's bestie?
𝐀 : STILL GOING STRONG SISTER
SERENITY : how to lower hoseok's volume? i'm kidding, be as loud as ever.
𝐐 : if you could love serenity once more, would you do it?
𝐀 : no, not romantically [scoffs] she always belonged with jungkook ... everything happens for a reason.
[ 𝓴𝓲𝓶 𝓼𝓮𝓸𝓴𝓳𝓲𝓷 ]
𝐐 : if serenity were to given you a second chance, would you not fuck it up (opps) and actually care for her? like actually take it seriously?
𝐀 : [scoffs] she never gave me a chance in the first place?
SERENITY : because your bitch ass wanted to jump right into a relationship without respecting my decision, or wanting to get to know me first-
JUNGKOOK : you're better than this baby [picks her up] let's go
𝐐 : whose your girl now?
𝐀 : i wish i had an answer to that question [covers up sadness quickly with raised brows and flirtatious looks] anyone want to hit me up?
𝐐 : do you still miss serenity? did you actually love her?
𝐀 : i do miss her [starts to regret confession] i know for a fact that she doesn't miss me ... i tried so many times to contact her later but she just cut me off. all i wanted was for us to be together but i should've not played with her feelings [regrets second confession] and no, i wouldn't say i actually love her or ever did.
𝐐 : do you still play with girls? i hope you've learned your lesson even if i love you in real life
𝐀 : i never did mate
SERENITY : the amount of bullshit i'm hearing today- [pulls out phone to contact her friends for receipts]
𝐐 : what's been the biggest life lesson for you? i hope you're well...
𝐀 : life lesson ah .. that sometimes things are out of your control, don't try to make things happen- you'll be disappointed and exhausted mentally.
𝐐 : do you regret cutting off ties with serenity?
𝐀 : she's the one who cut off ties with me [scoffs] didn't even give me a chance, how self absorbed can she be-
TAEHYUNG : heY YOU
JIN : [confused] what?
JIMIN : SHUT UP
TAEHYUNG : [shoulders slump down] i was going to say that :(
𝐐 : what were your true feelings for serenity? did you just have a small crush and not know how to deal with it?
𝐀 : i had a huge crush on Serenity since high school. i realised the feelings never went away after 3 years so i guess you could say i didn't handle it in the best way .. but i genuinely liked her.
𝐐 : who did you think you were, playing with serenity like that?
𝐀 : [tries not to get offended] i didn't come here for this abuse-
𝐐 : why did you become a playboy?
𝐀 : playboy? nah not me [wide smile]
𝐐 : Jin who broke your heart and made you the player that you are?
𝐀 : no one broke my heart, no one is the reason for the person i am today.
[ 𝓴𝓲𝓶 𝓷𝓪𝓶𝓳𝓸𝓸𝓷 ]
𝐐 : why didn't you tell serenity about jimin?
𝐀 : i didn't tell anyone, it was mine and Jimin's secret- ours [plays with fingers whilst a small smile slips onto his lips]
𝐐 : serenity or jimin? if you were alive or lived longer, who would you end up with?
𝐀 : Serenity and me were nothing but friends and i don't exactly know what me and Jimin were .. so none?
𝐐 : do you still watch over serenity from above?
𝐀 : always.
𝐐 : i miss you, and i hope you're well. please take care of serenity and the boys from above okay? :')
𝐀 : that's a promise i intend to keep. i hope you're well too love.
𝐐 : i hope you're having a blast up in heaven and i hope your pain is gone ❤️):
𝐀 : thank you for your kind words! [dimple smile] i'm resting in peace.
𝐐 : how would you respond to serenity's letter if you were alive?
𝐀 : i would respond with tears- both happy and sad. Serenity has always been a woman of sincerity so every aspect of her letter would hit hard. i would respond with gratitude, thanking her for noticing the small things, for remembering the memories even the worst ones, for being there for me until my last breath.
𝐐 : if you could have done anything different— changed your fate in any way, even if an early death was inevitable— what would you have done and how?
𝐀 : i would wish for a later death so i could have the chance to do all the things on my bucket list, continue to do the things i took for granted, for example: tickling Jimin, giving my scarf to Serenity or greeting my cat when coming home. but .. [tearful] fate is cruel and took me away from a life that could have been extraordinary. i hope Serenity and Jimin live lives that make me proud and joyful.
𝐐 : my lovely baby i'm so sorry life did you so wrong : ( were you happy with jimin and did you see serenity as no more than a best friend?
𝐀 : i was happy with Jimin but there were so many complications, we were together but not together .. i don't know what we were and it's the uncertainty that i think ate Jimin alive [feels guilty] i saw Serenity as no more than a best friend, she was so good to me and i miss them both.
AUTHOR & SERENITY & JIMIN : heY YOU you're not allowed to feel guilty when you had no control over your death do you hear me you gorgeous angel ??
𝐐 : also wow ilysm hope you're resting well because that is what you deserve after being such a great and hard working person 😙
𝐀 : hi omg ! [waves] thank you, please take care of you and love you.
𝐐 : it's not a question but, serenity loved you, jimin loved you & so much more people did too. the memories that they had with you will forever stay in their hearts. your in a better place now though, and i hope you are happy there. you are missed.
𝐀 : [wipes falling tears] to be aware of that love, is hard .. i loved them both so much, i wish i could have lived longer in order to create more beautiful memories with them. i'm glad i had more good memories than bad with each of them. i am at peace, thank you. take care of you! you are loved, needed and amazing!
𝐐 : if your time was extended, how would you react with serenity going through all this? what's your say on these seven letters and seven experiences?
𝐀 : the thought of my time being extended [shakes head with tired smile] i wouldn't react in the best way to be honest .. i would react irrationally. because a lot of the things Serenity had to go through were depressing and she had no one. these seven letters shaped Serenity to the person she is today and she's a fighter. she knows they don't define her but she's thankful for every experience- good or bad and that makes me really proud [tear falls]
𝐐 : if u were able to see how serenity is now, what would u think of her and what would u tell her if u had an opportunity somehow?
𝐀 : i would think she's the most amazing woman in my life. i would feel inspired, proud and tearful because when i met her she was broken, unhappy [takes a long time to think] what would i tell her? i'd tell her that i'm proud of her, that even on the days she's giving up .. i'm there even though she can't see me.
𝐐 : my baby, R.I.P. but if you did live, who would u marry?
𝐀 : whoever life and destiny brought me to, whoever embraced my heart and stayed with me forever .. guess i'll never know [suddenly sad]
𝐐 : why didn't you tell serenity about jimin?
𝐀 : time ran out before i could [devastated] plus, i didn't know what to say, how to bring it up- i didn't want to be judged.
[ 𝓴𝓲𝓶 𝓽𝓪𝓮𝓱𝔂𝓾𝓷𝓰 ]
𝐐 : are you happy that you and serenity have reconnected and ended in good terms?
𝐀 : HECK YEAH
SERENITY : [fist bump]
𝐐 : do you think serenity really belonged to jungkook? I mean like it was meant to be or you knew from the start?
𝐀 : i didn't know from the start .. no, because i genuinely liked Serenity and never thought of her going out with my best friend. so when she did and i saw them being intimate after our break up, it did hurt and i was confused. but after talking things through with kookie, knowing him all these years, he's family to me and i've learnt so much about his connection with Serenity. when i saw how much their time together impacted them both, i knew they were meant to be happy together because they deserved that.
𝐐 : who's your husband?
𝐀 : a handsome man who admires me in all my glory and-
AUTHOR : the amount of people who asked this question [laughs] you can imagine tae's husband as whoever
𝐐 : uh my brother is looking for someone, so uhhh HMU-
𝐀 : MATCH MAKER TAE IS READY
JUNGKOOK : i still cant believe i swore in front of your son [guilty after flashback of him chasing tae]
𝐐 : did you know about your sexuality when you were with serenity?
𝐀 : not entirely, no [plays with rings on fingers] i didn't want to believe that i wasn't straight and i felt better when i started to actually like Serenity. i did eventually lose interest which i now know is because i'm gay .. but i didn't want to hurt her. my temptation got the best out of me- we both ended up getting hurt.
𝐐 : how's your son?
𝐀 : thank you for asking this! [uwu] he's good, he's currently watching Mulan, the disney movie and eating cookies and cream ice cream wooooo!
𝐐 : whO do yoU ship serenity with more?
𝐀 : do you want me to say myself? [confused] obviously i ship serenity with my best friend kookie.
𝐐 : who would you want serenity to end up with, if not jungkook, out of all the boys and why?
𝐀 : maybe .. Hoseok but he's taken, he's a kind hearted guy but then again he did make a shitty mistake in the past by ditching our dear Serenity. what about .. what's his name again? [hears whisper in ear] Jimin! he's a good guy too, adorable but isn't he the one who left Serenity too? bitch, all these men did her dirty-
SERENITY : including you [whispers]
TAEHYUNG : huh?
SERENITY : nothing gucci ass
𝐐 : did you realise early on in the relationship with serenity that you were gay, or did it come later? if early, what were you feeling at the time?
𝐀 : i always had an idea that maybe i'm interested in men too? but the definite realisation of me and my sexuality came later on when Serenity left me. the kiss with the boy in the library triggered me, so it came later in the relationship. i owe so much to Serenity because she truly allowed me to find myself.
SERENITY : [wiping away tears with yeontan in her arms] well said
𝐐 : so did you ever have feelings for jungkook?
𝐀 : wHO TF STOLE MY DIARY-
𝐐 : are you proud that you played matchmaker?
𝐀 : A BITCH IS PROUD AND DESERVES ALL THE RECOGNITION [wants award]
𝐐 : if you weren't gay, would you love and marry Serenity?
𝐀 : who knows? what do you think?
[ 𝓳𝓮𝓸𝓷 𝓳𝓾𝓷𝓰𝓴𝓸𝓸𝓴 ]
𝐐 : what if serenity ended up with someone else? would you try to do something so she could love you or drop it for her happiness?
𝐀 : knowing the wimp that i am .. i wouldn't have chased after her [shrugs] i would've dropped it for her happiness, that he must deserve her .. that he must've done something better than me to deserve someone like Serenity. it wouldn't matter to me because i know in my heart even when we faded apart, that a small part of her did love me in some way.
𝐐 : how long did you wait for her? love or lust?
𝐀 : years didn't i? [huffs] love always, love wins doesn't it?
𝐐 : how's serenity in bed ;)))
𝐀 : ...
𝐐 : what is love to you? and how does it feel to be in love?
𝐀 : love to me is a gift and a blessing. it's something you don't receive easily and i know it has its bad side .. but i'm optimistic and i love love. because the feeling of being in love is unique. it's fast heartbeats, sweaty palms, hand holding, kisses against forehead, screaming at the walls with pleads of stay's and why's, gentle goodbye kisses and it's like a home.
𝐐 : were you secretly happy that tae sent the letter?
𝐀 : yeah but don't tell him, i like making him feel guilty [grins]
TAE : you brat!
SERENITY : thank you for sending the letter you absolute legend!
𝐐 : how does it feel now that the girl you were in love with forever, is now your fiancé?
𝐀 : it feels like a dream. i've thought about this day for so long .. her coming back to me was pure happiness, embracing her, loving her with passionate kisses, hearing her say i love you out loud. and now to call her my fiancé, i waited so long- years, i like to think that i deserve this euphoria.
𝐐 : how many kids do you potentially want to have with serenity?
𝐀 : we're not planning on having kids any time soon but [whispers] i want 6 or 7 but my wife goes mental when-
SERENITY : [eavesdropping] I TOLD YOU THE LIMIT IS 3 JUNGKOOK
JIMIN : why won't you give the man what he wants? [sticks up for kookie]
SERENITY : oh soRRY are you going to pop out seven humans whilst being in agonising pain? [throws tantrum]
𝐐 : how did it feel to finally hold her in your arms and say she's all mine?
𝐀 : like all the years i waited for her were worth it [wraps arm around Serenity's shoulder, kisses the side of her pretty head and leaves happily]
𝐐 : would there be a part of yourself that would thank tae for sending the letter? what happened after?
𝐀 : of course, i'm very grateful to the man i call my best friend [rolls eyes] it was quite funny actually, since he locked himself in his bedroom and knew that if he came out he would be tackled to the floor by me. so then, he escaped through his window and posted my letter. he came back, greeted me energetically even though he was drenched in rain. "what a fine day for romance!" and he kissed my head.
then days later, i was too nervous to confront Serenity about the letter. i knew that she had received it and i wanted to see her again, talk to her. so me and Taehyung arranged a way to. i joined her on her bus ride home, afraid .. and now the rest is history [blushes]
𝐐 : did you know that serenity had also sent a few letters to the people she had loved before? how did you feel after knowing/seeing those letters?
𝐀 : i didn't know until she told me [rubs eyes cutely] it did make me feel less special, but i thought it was needed ... such a Serenity thing to do and it's her life- a life that i'm happy to be a part of.
𝐐 : how long did you have to wait for serenity until she finally came back to you? also, what motivated you to keep on waiting for her?
𝐀 : years, my heart couldn't move on. what motivated me? hm [dazed] the hope that she remembered what i said to her the day she left me, about her acknowledging me with any action.
𝐐 : would you move on if you hadn't met serenity again?
𝐀 : maybe, i don't know. eventually, i think i would have but there would be a part of me that was always hers.
[ 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓴 𝓳𝓲𝓶𝓲𝓷 ]
𝐐 : if namjoon were to live longer, would you confessed your feelings to him?
𝐀 : i did .. we didn't work out the way we wanted to [sad smile]
𝐐 : did you think about serenity when you travelled?
𝐀 : i tried not to because the guilt in my mind was horrible [shivers] but of course, it was hard not to think about her. everytime i visited a bar in a foreign country, i wondered what she'd think- would she laugh and think about how we hooked up? what would it be like to travel with her?
𝐐 : do you regret leaving serenity?
𝐀 : yes but no?
𝐐 : would you be back in a relationship with serenity?
𝐀 : maybe [quiet] i should've come back earlier right?
𝐐 : did you like Namjoon?
𝐀 : no, i loved him. still do.
𝐐 : do you regret leaving serenity? was it the right decision?
𝐀 : personally, for me it was [leans back in chair] there's a part of me that regrets leaving her but the other part of me doesn't because it helped me. my travels around the world, suitcase in my hand, passport in my pocket, meeting strangers, inhaling the sense of a new country where no one knew me or my past .. it was refreshing and i learnt so much about myself, that i finally
felt content living with the person i had grown up to be.
𝐐 : did you take all the time you needed to feel at peace with everything again?
𝐀 : i did, a couple of years and they helped me to feel okay.
𝐐 : would you see namjoon as your first love or someone who you'll always love unconditionally?
𝐀 : both [quick to answer] he was someone i wanted to spend the rest of my life with but he got sick [clenches fist] he's always going to be my unconditional first love .. because how could anyone forget a charming man like Namjoon?
𝐐 : what would you want someone who's just lost a loved one to know?
𝐀 : just hold on [nod] time is full of healing and promises, trust me.
𝐐 : when you were with serenity how often did you think about namjoon?
𝐀 : more than she knew, i found myself lost in my thoughts of him constantly. me and Serenity used each other to heal from heartbreaks that weren't our fault and we knew that. also, it was inevitable to think about him because she reminded me of him in so many ways- we both had the honour of knowing him too.
𝐐 : why did you leave when there were other people mourning over his death too? you could have found comfort within each other
𝐀 : don't get me wrong, me and Serenity did find comfort within each other [thankful] but we used each other and we would've continued to do so if i hadn't left. we were both people who didn't like to be alone and now we've learned. other people were mourning too .. but everyone grieves differently.
𝐐 : when you travelled, were the nights lonely? was your past able to reach you as you travelled?
𝐀 : the nights were very lonely. it was a long process to get used to being alone on the nights i craved for a hand to hold, a shoulder to cry on. my past never seems to leave me alone [chuckles] it reaches me fast, i could travel to the edge of the earth and i would still feel suffocated.
𝐐 : was it fun travelling the world and leaving someone who loved you behind?
𝐀 : i feel the shade [presses hand to heart and pretends to be offended] it was fun i guess .. but the regret was not appreciated in my travels [frowns]
𝐐 : would you have married or be partners with namjoon if he lived ?
𝐀 : i'd like to think so :)
𝐐 : what made you leave so suddenly? you had so many opportunities to leave her, yet you chose that one moment. what was going through your head that made you decide to leave?
𝐀 : leaving Serenity was on my mind for days because using her, the possibility of never truly loving her and the guilt was eating away at me. we were both still healing and i needed to leave, not just for myself but for her too. i only left because i knew Serenity held a nature so understanding.
[ 𝓶𝓲𝓷 𝔂𝓸𝓸𝓷𝓰𝓲 ]
𝐐 : hey love, have you found someone else?
𝐀 : my old answer was 'not yet' but i have actually. let's see how it goes!
𝐐 : even though serenity is your first love, do you think you'll find someone and love them the same way you did like with serenity?
𝐀 : i like to think that maybe there's someone out there for me [crosses legs] i'm slowly starting to regret not moving on from Serenity fast enough.
𝐐 : you've learned your lesson, you are able to move on, learn to find yourself/ love yourself, and love others. obviously it'll take time, but do you think you'll be able to do that?
𝐀 : i've never seen myself in a positive light and when Serenity left, it got worse. i'm lazy and depressed [scoffs] i don't know honestly. but if Yoongi in the future learns his lesson, learns that he's human, moves on, learns to find himself, love himself and other people .. then i'll give you all my money [laughs] i have a lot to learn, let's hope it happens!
𝐐 : hey boo, what's good?
𝐀 : my-
AUTHOR : don't say it bitch
YOONGI : [sighs] life's good, back at you boo, how are you doing?
𝐐 : do you think you'd be able to finally move on? find happiness?
𝐀 : i hope so, i want to give up most days.
𝐐 : serenity changed after y'all breakup, what happened with you after it?
𝐀 : it fucked me up more
𝐐 : please give a short summary of your life after everything happened?
𝐀 : Serenity left me and i'm still finding it hard to come to terms with. i've let myself down so many times, desperately wanting her to come back. i didn't let her move on for years after we broke up, i constantly brought up the subject and i shouldn't have. years later and i'm trying to forget her, move on .. but it's hard. i'm simply surviving life as it passes me blankly.
𝐐 : do you hope to be good friends with serenity again?
𝐀 : to be honest, i don't think we could ever be really good friends. impossible.
𝐐 : oh and, were you aware that you were hurting serenity by your actions?
𝐀 : yes .. i'm not proud of it
𝐐 : do you ever plan to send that letter?
𝐀 : never
𝐐 : did you ever find happiness after?
𝐀 : i wish the answer was yes
𝐐 : my gummy, did you find love?
𝐀 : not yet [irritated] let's share a pack of gummy bears?
𝐐 : how are you? i miss you :'))
𝐀 : i could be better mate, how are you? i miss you too cutie ;)
𝐐 : though I wanted serenity to be with Jungkook, a part of me wanted her to be with you. If serenity had actually come back for you, would you have accepted her ?
𝐀 : really? Serenity wouldn't be happy to hear that [scoffs] if she did .. that's a fucking laugh, impossible. i would accept her no matter what.
[ 𝓜𝓔- 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓪𝓾𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓻]
𝐐 : which is your favorite chapter/letter?
𝐀 : i have too many! thank you for this question [thumbs up] my favourite letters were jimin, jungkook and namjoon. my favourite chapters were come back!, good out of bad, just the beginning and restful soul restless soul.
𝐐 : why you sad?
𝐀 : IDK NAN MOLLA (ya'll sing it with me)
𝐐 : do any of the boys' personalities remind u of someone u have in ur life? or is it purely from ur imagination?
𝐀 : yes! definitely! i'm the kind of writer who brings personal experiences and characters from my own story into my fictional stories [laughs] so Jin and Yoongi are based on real stories, they are real characters.
but aspects of the boys personalities reflect some people i know. for example, Jungkook's purity, Taehyung's playful side, Jimin's adventurous side etc. but i did make them all into characters that everyone would fall in love with. they all hold characteristics that are perfect to me but at the same time there's their flaws. so i do wish i had people like them entirely.
Serenity is of course based off my imagination, but she reflects my personality in many ways such as, giving too much of yourself to others, growth and self love, making everything seem Romantic and overthinking. so she's the most important person to me.
𝐐 : WHY WERE MESSING W MY FEELINGS??? YOU MADE ME CRY SO FUCKING MUCH LIKE ICANT SJKSNJSS ;-; ily tho
𝐀 : ily ily ily I APOLOGISE BUT IT HAD TO BE DONE WKSJS
𝐐 : but what else made you inspired to create your story? how do you come up with these heartbreaks? like holy crap they actually did made me cry- ESPECIALLY THAT NAMJOON LETTER OH MY GAWD N WHEN SERENITY WENT TO VISIT HIM LM SKSBKSBSJS
𝐀 : other than the movie, scenes from other movies, books, real life experiences, everything around me- even the media and other fanfics inspire me! i don't know how i came up with these heartbreaks .. all i know is that i wanted my readers to feel, to feel so much that they felt exactly what the characters felt. i wanted every heartbreak to be realistic and difficult.
𝐐 : how did you decide that serenity would end up with jungkook?
𝐀 : i couldn't decide that's the thing [shrugs] which is why i asked for everyone's opinions. it was either going to be Jungkook/Jimin i knew that. but i felt like Jungkook deserved a happy ending .. a happy ending with Serenity :")
i finally created a happy ending in a book!
𝐐 : how do you manage to be so amazing at what you do?
𝐀 : this is too much :") i don't have an answer to that tysm
𝐐 : how are you so precious and talented and ... and how are you real i mean i love you
𝐀 : what if i said i'm nOT REAL [rolls eyes at myself] i actually love you
𝐐 : how tf do you manage to make me cry even with you breathing?
𝐀 : it's a talent my flower- i hope they weren't always sad/angry tears !! if so, give me a hug will you?
𝐐 : how did you find the actual plot, or what inspired you? which character other than serenity you liked most?
𝐀 : the actual plot was inspired by the movie TATBILB !! (now there's a sequel coming out, i'm excited) but of course, i wanted it to be more than just high school crushes. so i changed up the characters massively. i was going to leave it at that but then asked my friends, how should i continue the book? they all said- SEND THE LETTERS MAKE SERENITY SEND THE LETTERS !!
so that's exactly what i did ;)
and i know in order to make it as realistic as possible, i had to make Serenity not have a happy ending with all of them. i wanted closure for the characters. i apologise because my memory sucks and i don't remember exactly how i came up with the individual scenes.
other than Serenity hm [huff] i loved Jimin, Taehyung and Namjoon :) what about you guys?
𝐐 : hOW ARE YOU SO DAMN CREATIVE LIKE DAMN BOB
𝐀 : bOB IS YOUR BIGGEST FAN
𝐐 : what was your favorite chapter to write? did you originally have serenity ending up with one of the other boys?
𝐀 : my favourite chapter to write was when Serenity came to see Taehyung. i had it all planned out in my head, how i wanted Serenity to see Jungkook from across the room- the intense eye contact .. etc. also! i was excited for Jimin and Serenity to reunite [claps hands] i think you can tell from that .. that i originally wanted it to be either Jimin or Jungkook.
𝐐 : how does it feel to know that you own my entire heart?
𝐀 : unreal, euphoric-
JUNGKOOK : taKE MY HANDS NOW-
JIN : i'm thE ONE I SHOULD-
HOSEOK : [here to steal the spotlight] i really wanna wanna wanna-
YOONGI : [gets off seesaw] i win now shut up all of you
𝐐 : where do you get inspiration for your books, especially this one?
𝐀 : usually i get inspiration from everything and everyone around me. from the weather to my friends experiences, there's a huge variety and i get inspired by even the smallest things. but especially for this book, i got inspired by the movie of course, how much i love writing letters, putting bangtan into seven meaningful letters differently- all relating to one specific person just grabbed my attention.
𝐐 : how does it feel so be an amazing adorable awesome lovely human being? that writes touching pieces of art? that literally? deserves? the? world?
𝐀 : i? love? you? more? than? food? thank you my sweet. please take care of you and it feels unreal :") thank you ALL so much for your support !!
𝐐 : how does one write such deep content?
𝐀 : one lives
𝐐 : will you add smut and was that last chapter the epilogue?
𝐀 : i LOVE this question because who the hell doesn't love good smut??? but i'm sorry to say that i won't :// i suck at it and i used to but not anymore [boo] also, yes the last chapter, which was a time jump, was the epilogue!
𝐐 : was your intention to spread a message about self love through this book? okay so, what do u believe is the purpose of this book, if any?
𝐀 : i never saw it as that but oh my [claps hands happily] yes! now that i look at it like that, i would say the book spreads the message of self love, doing things like letting go of a toxic person for yourself even though it'll destroy you, the growth of a person, the importance of memories and the past, how time does heal. the purpose of this book hm, would be celebration. because yeah, we all love people more than we should in our life on earth .. it's inevitable and some experiences hurt more than others. but it makes us, us. the purpose is to do things with love always, despite how cruel life can challenge us.
𝐐 : what did it feel like writing this & has this made you realise anything? like some lessons?
𝐀 : it was fun writing this, i enjoyed every second of it. i usually draft at least ten chapters before posting a book and with this one i didn't! so i challenged myself and gave myself a week for every chapter. it was exciting thanks to you guys and the plot itself was too.
i realised a lot of things, but most importantly i realised how much i've grown :") but yeah, this book- the experience of writing such a plot has taught me a lot. although i am not Serenity and some of the experiences in this book i haven't been through, i still feel connected.
i've learnt life lessons like, love comes in different shapes and sizes, there's always two sides to every story- every situation, how writing gives closure and comfort and how having a physical copy of a letter brings something different to oneself, some people get happy endings and some don't and sometimes that can be due to the individual themselves, internal struggles are temporary and lastly, whatever you're going through right now doesn't last forever- some of the best days of your life haven't even happened yet.
𝐐 : if Jungkook was never in here, who would she end up with?
𝐀 : probably Jimin, he was a close second due to my opinion and the answer from the question i had asked :)
𝐐 : what was the experience writing this book?
𝐀 : a rollercoaster [claps hands] and this one was exciting, joyful and emotional. my experience of writing this book became more motivating when i realised people were reading it, people wanted me to carry on .. even after the letters. you guys! you guys inspired me to continue, do more with this book and therefore create the adrenaline rushing storyline of the letters getting sent so thank you! this experience holds some of the best feelings and i'm so sad that it's over.
𝐐 : sweetheart, how do u come up with these sort of ideas which can make a person weep in their sleep?
𝐀 : i honestly don't know? my ideas come to me randomly [shrugs] usually in the shower, i think of the characters or different scenarios etc :) i kind of wish now that i made a diary of when i was writing every chapter of this book!
𝐐 : puppeteer? did you enjoy playing with my hearts strings?
𝐀 : i enjoyed it with every atom in my body thank you very much ;) ily
𝐐 : how to write good like you?
𝐀 : bless you [wipes tears] i'm sure you're just as good of an author, keep writing .. don't ever lose your love for the things you write about! strive to achieve more, improve more and be more you.
𝐐 : first of all, i love the way you write. i was instantly captured by your writing and i loved every letter. i'd love to write like you one day! was serenity originally meant to end up with someone else, or was it jungkook all along?
𝐀 : thank you! thank you for reading and leaving this comment. you're such a splendid person :") it was either going to be Jimin/Jungkook !!
𝐐 : you are such an amazing author I love you so much for writing this book. I came here because someone on Instagram commented on a post about this book. And I am glad that I came here to read this.
𝐀 : i love you for reading and leaving me this fab comment :") i'm so glad you found me and decided to read !!
𝐐 : this isn't a question buT i just wanna say ily for this it couldn't have been written better🤧
𝐀 : ily & thanks for being here
𝐐 : how does it feel to be the cause of my physical and emotional heartache hmm? when are you gonna send me my check to pay for the hospital bills? no but seriously you are literally the epitome of amazing and talented. I've been stuck on this period of being bored with all the books I try to read but I was recommended yours through a post on insta. let me say I feel so much privileged to read such art. Love you author <3
𝐀 : i'm broke :"( lsidks
i so understand this, it takes me a while to find good books to read on this app .. they're usually cliche but the ones i do find are lovelier than ever. so glad you found me! i heart you <33
—
𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜
xxx
if you're still unsatisfied and have more questions after this, then pm me! my inbox is always open loves!
i hope i managed to answer your questions, some were really hard omg
thank you all so much for your questions, they held honesty and thought which meant so much to me! i loved answering every single of the questions and i made sure to take my time with this Q&A so i gave the best answers for you guys <3
happy holidays!
wishing you all the blessings, love and happiness :)