^ Park Sooyoung/Joy
"You wanted to see me?" Jisoo shifted the book in her arms and held it tightly to her chest. She thought she had done well in her midterm but Professor Lee asking her to stay after class didn't seem like a good sign.
"Yes, I wanted you to take a look at your exam." Professor Lee flipped through a stack of tests till he found the one with Jisoo's name on it. Swirly 'J' and finished with a smiley face.
Jisoo took the test and reluctantly let her eyes fall on the red mark in the top right corner.
"Are you serious?" Jisoo asked, wide eyed.
Professor lee chuckled and held out his hand for Jisoo to return her test.
"But thats an A right? 93 is an A, Isn't it?" Jisoo asked, still a little shocked.
"It is." He placed Jisoo's test back in its place, "It seems you've improved."
"Uh, yeah!" Jisoo was over being shocked and had moved onto being extremely excited.
"With the improvements you've made I wanted to give you the option of putting a stop to the tutoring." Lee attention was only half on Jisoo and half on the new students entering the room for his next class.
Stop tutoring? But that would mean no more Jennie, wouldn't it? Sure Jisoo considered them to be friends but up to this point it was mostly based on circumstance. They had become friends because Jennie didn't have the choice not to spend time with Jisoo. Given the option would she still spend time with her?
"I think I'd like to keep up with the tutoring." Her words came out fast, like if she didn't say it right away she might not have the option anymore. "I mean, it's been really helpful."
"Very well." He offered her a small smile before moving around her to get ready to start his class, "I just wanted to give you the choice."
And just like that he was diving into his next class, leaving Jisoo to make her exit while overthinking what had just happened.
Was it fair to trap Jennie like that? Was trap even the right word? Was she being silly in thinking Jennie wouldn't hang out with her without being forced to? She did say yes to the carnival, after all. But that was after Jisoo had brought up using it as a study date to watch people. Why had she done that? Or right, cause she's an idiot.
—
Jennie had slipped in while Jisoo was talking to Professor Lee at the front of the room. Like usual she made her way up to the back of the auditorium and dropped down into one of the seats near the wall. She kicked her foot up onto the seat in front of her and sank down low in it.
Showing up to class was such a boring way to spend her day and it was severely cutting into her regular naps.
She had yet to call her mother back and honestly had no intention to. Her mother would find her if she really wanted to. But the email from Lee was something she was actually nervous about. Especially seeing the face Jisoo was making up front.
For the first time in her life Jennie wished she had sat closer to the front so she could hear what they were talking about. The only thing she could think of was Jisoo's test. Had she done poorly and now they were both in trouble? If that was the case it wasn't Jisoo's fault at all. It had to be her fault.
She was about to march down to the front of the room and take the blame but Jisoo turned and left before she could. Jennie would have to set the record straight after class, then. Maybe she could get Jisoo a retake.
—
"She what?" Jennie's mouth hung agape at the news.
"Next time you start demanding a retake make sure they actually need it first." Lee shook his head and packed up his things.
"If she passed, why did you want to see us both?" Jennie's asked slightly confused. She had never been asked to see a teacher for being good before.
"I wanted to congratulate Jisoo, and give you the option of stepping down as her tutor." He grabbed his bag and gestured for Jennie to follow him out.
"Step down?" Jennie followed him into the hallway, avoiding crashing into other students making their way to class.
"Your attendance over the past few weeks has been great, and with the obvious success of you taking the time to tutor Miss Kim, I believe you have more than earned the extra credit needed to bring your grade up." He pushed open the door leading outside and let Jennie lead him out, "If you keep up the attendance and class participation you're going to pass without a problem."
"What about Jisoo?" Jennie asked, gripping her jacket and pulling. It tighter around herself.
"I can assign her another tutor."
"That's ok."
"What's ok?" Lee asked, pulling open the door to the administration building.
"I'll keep tutoring her." Jennie shrugged and followed him in.
Lee stopped walking and turned to her with a perplexed expression, "Really?"
"Yeah, really."
"Even though I'm telling you that you don't have to?" He seemed positively lost at the idea of Jennie volunteering to do extra work.
Jennie scoffed, "Yeah, what's the big deal?"
He looked at her for a second trying to decide if she was being serious or not. He was well acquainted with her sarcasm and overall lazy attitude so he knew full well this was out of character.
He nodded slowly before starting down the hall again, "No big deal. Makes my life easier, actually. Now I don't have to find her a new tutor."
Jennie was following slowly but noticed they were fast approaching the deans office, "Great, that all then?"
She didn't wait for an answer after seeing her mother through the open office door. They made eye contact and Chaerin was on her feet the same time Jennie turned and rushed back towards the doors leading out of the building.
Lee watched the Dean speed walk past him after Jennie. He turned just in time to see Jennie smash open the doors and make a break for it. He let out a chuckle and shook his head. There was the Jennie he enjoyed so much.
——
"How about this one?" Jisoo turned around and pulled gently on the hem of her shirt as she looked down at her outfit.
"What— is that even yours?" Lisa raised an eyebrow and leaned back on her hands on Jisoo's bed.
Jisoo looked down at the shirt and smiled, "Well no. I kind of borrow it from someone and just haven't given it back yet."
"Its Jennie's isn't it?" Lisa grinned knowingly.
"What? Why would you—" Jisoo looked up embarrassed and noticed Lisa's smug grin and let out a laugh, "Ok yeah, it is. How'd you know?"
"Because your face did that thing." Lisa stood up and walked to the closet and started sifting through the things hung up.
"That thing?" Jisoo's eyebrows pushed together as they ignored Lisa pulling things from the closet and dropping them to the floor.
"Yeah, you know, that thing it does when you talk about Jennie." Lisa held up a dress to Jisoo and looked it over before tossing it to the ground.
"Thats crazy, my face doesn't do a thing." Jisoo scoffed but was suddenly worried that Lisa was right. Did her face do a thing? Because lately she had noticed her heart did a thing...
"This." Lisa lifted a hanger, "Wear this."
Jisoo grabbed the hanger and held the dress up against herself with a frown, "This will be too cold."
"Not if you wear this, and this too." Lisa tossed some tights and a sweater on the bed and placed her hands on her hips with a grin.
"You're good at this." Jisoo looked at the outfit they had picked out and smiled at her. "And my face doesn't do a thing."
"Sure it doesn't, Chu." Lisa grinned and turned and walked out of the bedroom with a little extra strut.
Lisa walked into the kitchen and grabbed a brownie from off the counter and took a bite. She hummed at how good they tasted but frowned when she saw Chaeyoung sitting on the couch with a worried expression. Stress baking. Tasted so good, but the pouting was always a little distracting.
"Everything ok Chaeng?" Lisa shoved the rest of the brownie in her mouth before making her way over to Chaeyoung and sitting down next to her.
"Of course. Why wouldn't everything be ok?" Chaeyoung's face was strained in a grimace trying to be a smile.
Lisa twisted her lips to the side and ran a hand through her hair, "You know, I think you're pretty great."
"You do?" Chaeyoung turned quickly, the worry clear in her eyes.
"Yeah." Lisa nodded assuredly, "Like, I think its great that you have a big heart and care about a lot of people." She scooted a little closer to Chaeyoung and put her arm around her shoulder, "And I think its great that your friends are so important to you and you'd do anything for them. And I think its great that you do your best to help people."
Chaeyoung gave her a small smile, her face relaxing with each new compliment.
"But you know what I think is the greatest?" Lisa asked, tilting her head and giving Chaeyoung's shoulder a squeeze.
"What?" Chaeyoung asked innocently, her expression more curious than worried now.
"Your brownies." Lisa grinned.
"Oh, you." Chaeyoung giggled and leaned her shoulder into her.
"Feeling better?" Lisa asked, smiling brightly as Chaeyoung's smile started to grow bigger.
"Much." Chaeyoung smiled brightly at Lisa before leaning over and placing a soft kiss on her cheek.
Lisa looked down bashfully, her smile wide and cheeks dangerously close to matching Chaeyoung's hair color while Chaeng let out a giggle and stood up.
"Oh my!" Chaeyoung dashed towards the kitchen, "I left this place a mess!"
Lisa chuckled as she watched Chaeyoung make quick work of gathering dishes and wiping the counter. She must be feeling better if she's moved on from baking to cleaning.
—
This is stupid. Jennie drummed her fingers on the steering wheel as she let out another heavy sigh. She had been sitting outside Jisoo's apartment for a good 10 minutes trying to decide if she should go in and knock on her door or just text her letting her know she was there. It wasn't a date. Or was it? This is so stupid.
She pulled her phone out and hovered over Jisoo's number with her thumb for a second before pressing it an putting the phone to her ear. Calling her seemed like fair middle ground between a text and knocking.
it was on the 4th ring when Jennie starts regretting her choice to call. Was she early? Had Jisoo changed her mind?
There was the sound of shuffling, what sounded like Jisoo tripping then an out of breath, "hello?" Broke through the phone.
"Um, hey." Jennie greeted, still completely unsure she made the right choice in calling.
"Chaeyoung stop doing the dishes, we have to go!"
"I'm sorry?" Jennie spoke slowly, sinking back into the drivers seat.
"No sorry, not you!" Jisoo was back and this time probably talking to Jennie, "Chaeyoung was just- oh never mind. What's up?"
Jennie chuckled at Jisoo's attempt to seem calm but she could practically imagine her face scrunched up and fingers clenched. "Did you want me to come up? I'm outside and wasn't sure if.."
"Oh! No! That's great!" Jisoo exclaimed a little less frazzled and more excited, "I'll gather the troops and we will be down in a minute!"
Jennie sat up quickly, "wait, we?"
But it was too late. Jisoo had already hung up and Jennie was left to try to figure out this increasingly confusing evening on her own.
A few minutes later Jisoo followed behind the other two as they made their way towards Jennie's car.
"I still don't understand why we are going with you." Lisa walked ahead of Jisoo, "isn't this a date?"
"No, I don't think so." Jisoo whined, "I mean I thought it might be or could be but then I said we could go as a way to study so I don't know if she thinks it's a date or studying and I don't want to assume it's a date I she doesn't think it is and look like an idiot."
"So in order to not look like an idiot, you are bringing your two roommates with you, and your psych textbook?" Lisa shook her head in disbelief.
"I panicked." Jisoo grumbled, ushering the two girls towards the car.
"Well I'm excited." Chaeyoung chirped happily, "I love carnivals!"
Jisoo waved to Jennie as they got closer to the car and smiled when Jennie lifted her fingers off the steering wheel in a half assed gesture of waving back.
"Shotgun!" Lisa called out as she stepped up to the car.
Jennie heard her claim to the front seat and her jaw dropped and her hands gripped the wheel tighter.
Seriously?
"Seriously?" Jisoo turned wide eyed to face Lisa.
Lisa just shrugged and reached for the door handle, "I get car sick in the back."
"Oh my god." Jisoo was a mixture of embarrassed and flustered over this whole thing already and she hadn't even gotten into the car yet.
Jennie watched straight faced as Lisa climbed in the front seat and put on her seat belt. Lisa turned to face her with a goofy grin and was met with a few slow blinks before Jennie rolled her eyes and sighed before looking straight ahead.
"Hey Jen!" Jisoo greeted as she climbed in the back seat, trying to hide her disappointment in Lisa stealing the better seat, "I hope you don't mind us giving these guys a ride?"
"Why would I mind?" Jennie turned around ready to give her signature smirk to Jisoo. Then she saw the textbook and had to fight the urge to frown. She turned back to the front and sank a little lower in her seat. Her voice changed from light and playful to down right closed off. "We are just going to study, right?"
She was hoping Jisoo would correct her, tell her they were hanging out more than studying, that she had in fact asked her out like Jennie had originally thought. But Jisoo didn't say anything. And because Jennie was focused on driving, she didn't catch the disappointed look on Jisoo's face through the rear view mirror.
Jisoo sighed and looked out the window. Guess that answered that question. Chaeyoung gave her leg a gentle squeeze and tried to offer her a smile but Jisoo just turned back to the window and watched as the carnival lights drew closer.
They pulled into the campus parking lot and as soon as the car had shut off Lisa and Chaeyoung were jumping out of the car. Apparently they loved carnivals.
Jennie climbed out and pulled her leather jacket over her flannel and grabbed a beanie and shoved the end of it in her back pocket. It wasn't too cold out with the sun still up but nights were definitely starting to cool off now that it was nearing the end of October.
"Ready?" Jennie asked, shutting her door and locking the car.
"Yep." Jisoo smiled and gripped her hands together behind her back.
"Aren't you forgetting something?" Jennie raised an eyebrow as she looked through the window at the psych book sitting on the back seat.
Jisoo smiled and started walking towards the carnival before spinning around to walk backwards, "Nope."
She was determined to turn this night around. There may have been a massive mix up due to her uncanny ability to talk when she should really just shut up, but it only took a minute into the drive over for her to decide she was going to fix it.
Step one: get rid of any sign that she was actually doing homework on this outing.
Step two: well... She hadn't really figured out what step two was. But once she figured it out, boy was she going to rock at step two.
Jennie took a few long strides and caught up with Jisoo just before walking into the carnival. She still wasn't sure what was going on. Jisoo had her roommates but they had already seemed to have disappeared into the craziness of the carnival. She had also brought her book, which she suddenly decided she didn't need.
If there was ever an award for sending mixed signals, Kim Jisoo would be the winner. Every time.
"Where to first, cutie?" Jennie asked, stopping to look around the chaos of lights and music.
She had to admit, the university did know how to throw a party. There was a Ferris wheel, carousel, inflatable obstacle courses, cotton candy, hot dogs, dozens of carnival games, even a petting zoo. And that was all within the small space Jennie could see from where her feet were firmly planted.
When Jisoo didn't answer she turned to make sure she was ok and couldn't help but laugh at the sight.
Jisoo's eyes were wide, her smile even wider, and it looked like she wanted to do everything all at once and would never be able to choose where to begin.
"Oh no, cupcake." Jennie shook her head. "We are here to study, not have fun, remember?"
"Oh come on grumpy, one ride won't hurt." Jisoo was determined to get that first step out of the way. Not there to study. Not at all. She just had to make Jennie believe that.
"Fine." Jennie said flatly, "One ride."
"Yes!" Jisoo made a fist and pumped it in the air in victory, "To the ferris wheel!"
"Nope." Jennie quickly shoved her hands in her pockets, "Any ride but that one."
Jisoo gave her a sad look but quickly saw she wasn't going to change her mind, "Fine. Carousel then." She smiled and started walking towards it, "I want to see you ride that giant panther."
Jennie rolled her eyes and started to drag her feet to follow after Jisoo. Her composed demeanor was going to be hard to keep up with if she was going to have to watch Jisoo bounce around excitedly all night. She was pretty adorable and every time she turned with that wide smile of hers, Jennie felt her hard exterior melting just a little bit more.
——
"You sure they won't mind is ditching them?" Joy asked as she looped her arm through Matthew's.
"I have a feeling they won't mind at all." Lisa grinned and led the group away from Jisoo and Jennie who were settling down at a table with a bag of popcorn.
Chaeyoung looked over her shoulder with a worried expression. Jennie hadn't said a word to her all night and she didn't really blame her. She had been awful to her. And even though Chaeyoung was still worried for Jisoo, she decided to take the advice she had given Jisoo not too long ago and try to give Jennie a chance to be more than her reputation. Reluctantly she followed Lisa, Matthew and Joy to the row of carnival games.
"Babe, watch." Matthew smiled as Joy before taking a small ring and tossing it forward, trying to loop it around the top of one of the glass bottles placed together.
6 rings later and they were all on the ground and not on bottles. Joy giggled at the confused expression on Matthew's face. Apparently he thought it was going to be easy to win her a stuffed animal.
Lisa shook their head, "this games impossible." They scoffed, "it's rigged to take your money and leave you with broken confidence."
"I think you're right dude." Matthew turned to look at them, "I threw those rings like, perfectly bro, and none of them landed right."
Chaeyoung and Joy smiled at each other before Joy patted Matthew's back, "why don't we go try a different game. I don't like those prizes anyway."
"Don't worry babe, I'll get you the best prize here." Matthew smiled and started leading them to another game.
—
"Ok, this one should be easy." Lisa grinned at Matthew while Chaeyoung and Joy stood behind them with amused expressions. "You just have to get the ball to land in one of the cups and you win the goldfish."
"I'll bet you I win before you do." Matthew narrowed his eyes at Lisa and held up one of his ping pong balls.
"You're on." Lisa nodded confidently as she lined up her shot.
—
"Ok maybe it's harder than I thought." Lisa frowned and shoved her hands in her pockets.
Chaeyoung covered her mouth to hide her snickering at how disappointed she was. This truly was a sight. Matthew and Lisa competing (poorly) for silly carnival prizes. They were already down $30 worth of games lost, they should have just paid for the prize instead of playing these silly games just to keep losing.
"Oh! Dude!" Matthew lit up as he saw the next game, "this one will be easy!" He grabbed Joy's hand and tugged her to the next booth.
Lisa and Chaeyoung followed a little less excited. Lisa stepped up next to Matthew and Joy nudged Chaeyoung's shoulder.
"Maybe we should be the ones trying to win them prizes." She whispered with a smile. "At this rate we will be here all night."
Chaeyoung just nodded and smiled watching the pair step up for their shots.
A stack of milk jugs sat on a table in front of them. All they had to do was knock over the stack and they would win. Easy enough, right?
Matthew sent a wink over his shoulder to Joy before he wound back his arm. He threw it forward, launching the softball with impressive force and even more impressive speed. It would have been more impressive if he had hit *any* of the milk jugs, though.
"Ha!" Lisa belted, pointing at his still standing stack with a huge smile.
"Shut up." Matthew frowned and tried to secretly look over his shoulder at Joy. His frown deepened when he saw her trying to fight the smile on her face from him completely missing his Target. "You try it. It's not that easy."
Lisa stepped up to the counter and picked up a softball and tossed it straight up in the air a couple times before squaring their feet and pulling her arm back. Her tongue poked out of the corner of her mouth and one of her eyes closed.
Matthew watched with pursed lips and crossed arms at their slow set up. There's no way she can throw harder than him. No way.
Lisa took a breath then gently tossed the ball underhand towards the stack of bottles. Matthew's mouth dropped open as it went right to the stack and knocked down the bottle sitting on the very bottom row right in the middle.
The bottle barely teetered before falling over, the rest stacked on top crumbling down after it.
"No way!" Matthew hollered, cheers from behind them being louder than his cry of disbelief.
Lisa lifted her hand in the shape of a gun and blew on their finger to brag about their shot. "Brain before brawn big guy."
"That was amazing!!" Chaeyoung yelled as her arms wrapped around Lisa's neck in a hug.
Lisa chuckled and wrapped her arms around her waist and whispered, "think so?"
"Yes!" Chaeyoung smiled as she pulled back. "That was very impressive"
Lisa smiled bashfully, "it was nothing really. It's more about placement of the ball than force."
The game attendant walked over and handed Lisa her prize. A small teddy bear holding a heart between his paws. Lisa immediately took it and handed it to Chaeyoung with a wide smile.
Chaeyoung accepted it and hugged it to her chest with a smile as Matthew and Joy walked over.
"Come on." Matthew nodded toward a few games they hadn't tried yet, "you're not the only one that needs to win their girl a prize." He wiggled his eyebrows before leaning over and giving Joy a kiss.
Lisa's face started turning red and she immediately followed after Matthew who had already started walking to another booth.
Joy gave Chaeyoung a smile and Chaeyoung started turning redder than Lisa and couldn't even begin to hide the smile on her face.
"Oh we aren't- I mean she isn't my.." Chaeyoung stammered with a high voice.
"Uh huh." Joy teased, "all I know is they've both been playing these dumb games for forever and as soon as she won a prize she immediately gave it to you."
Chaeyoung felt a flutter in her stomach as she walked with Joy, teddy bear clutched in a hug against her chest. "We are just best friends. We've known each other forever."
"You can still be best friends and be more." Joy shrugged before skipping up to grab onto Matthew's hand.
Chaeyoung thought about it for a second, the possibility of it all. Lisa had always been her best friend. Her person. Its just the way it was. But maybe... the idea of being more wouldn't be so bad. She hid her smile in the fur of the teddy bear in her hands as she sped up to walk with Lisa, bumping their shoulder playfully once she caught up. Lisa gave her the warmest smile back and Chaeyoung could feel how much she loved her simply by the look in her eyes.
Yeah, maybe it wouldn't be too crazy to think about it.
——
"How about them?" Jennie asked before throwing another popcorn in her mouth.
Jisoo sat on the edge of the table, her legs hanging over the side and her feet swinging back and forth slowly. She reached over into the bag of popcorn in Jennie's hand and grabbed a handful.
"I don't know how you can just..." Jisoo shrugged and filled her mouth with popcorn, "tell just by watching someone."
"Come on, it's totally obvious." She tossed another piece in her mouth before hopping up on the table next to Jisoo.
They had been there for an hour and so far things were going pretty great. Lisa and Chaeyoung had reappeared with Matthew and Joy. The blush on Chaeyoung's face at the new couple joining them was a shade of red Jennie had never seen before.
No matter how much teasing and prodding, Chaeyoung couldn't manage to string together a coherent sentence while looking at either of them. The best part was Jennie and the art models were the only ones that knew why.
After embarrassing Chaeyoung a good amount, they all went on a few rides together. Correction... Chaeyoung, Lisa, Matthew, Joy and Jisoo had gone on a few rides. Jennie stood nearby and pretended to look bored.
She actually couldn't take her eyes off Jisoo, though. And even though she wasn't a fan of rides, she was definitely becoming very a fan of watching Jisoo go on rides. She was so innocent, and happy. Her laugh carried with it a lightness then made Jennie smile even if she was trying not to. She could pick out Jisoo's laugh from anywhere. If didn't matter how loud it had gotten or if she lost sight of her. The sound of Jisoo laughing was like her own personal homing beacon.
With all the rides and lines, talking came and went fairly easily. Matthew, Joy and the duo seemed to be extremely good at dominating whatever discussion was happening at the time and that left Jennie and Jisoo to steal glances and hide smiled from each other while they pretending to listen to whatever the other ones were saying.
This was actually the first time since walking into the carnival that Jisoo and Jennie were actually alone and Jisoo couldn't help but notice how comfortable it felt.
It started with Jennie making fun of people, naturally. And then morphed into people watching. It wasn't exactly the turn Jisoo was hoping for, but it definitely didn't feel like studying even if they technically were.
"You can't just say he's only doing it to impress the girl." Jisoo argued. Taking another handful of popcorn.
"Oh please. Watch him." Jennie scooted closer to Jisoo so their thighs were pressed together and their shoulders bumped gently.
Jisoo tried to focus on the couple they had been talking about but couldn't get her mind to focus on anything but the warmth of Jennie's body. The sun was just about set and the air was growing colder and Jennie's warmth was an obvious contrast to the fall breeze surrounding them.
Jisoo slowly leaned into Jennie, pressing their bodies slightly tighter together and watched out of the corner of her eye as Jennie's lips turned up into the slightest smile at her movement.
Step two... Sure, this could be step two. It seemed to be working so why not?
"See?" Jennie turned to look at Jisoo and was surprised to find the girls soft brown eyes already on her.
Jisoo locked eyes with Jennie and smiled shyly before turning to look where she was supposed to be looking in the first place. Jennie watched her turn her head and her cheeks turn pink before turning back to the couple herself.
"He looks perfectly happy to-" Jisoo s posture stiffened then deflated, "oh."
Jennie chuckled and leaned back on the palms on her hands on the table, "Told you. Changing ones own actions to appease or impress another person, thereby ignoring ones own wants and desires."
Jisoo rolled her eyes, "you could have just said, guy does something he doesn't want to do to impress a girl."
"I could have." Jennie smirked and twisted her leg so her knee bumped into Jisoo's playfully. "But it's Maslows hierarchy of needs."
Jisoo turned her head around to stick her tongue out at Jennie quickly before hopping off the table, "I'm going to grab more food. Want anything?"
Jennie was up and on her feel faster than Jisoo had ever seen her move, "I got it."
Jisoo gave her a questioning look, "You sure? Cause you got the popcorn."
Jennie took a step forward into Jisoo's space and leaned closer to her ear, "I'm sure."
Jisoo shook her head but had a smile. At least playful flirty Jennie was back and whatever bad mood that had been lingering in the car was gone. She hopped back up on the table and pulled her cardigan tighter around herself as she watched Jennie disappear into the crowds near all the food trucks.
"Jisoo, hey!" Soojoo zigzagged between people to approach Jisoo, "there you are, I've been looking for you."
"You have?" Jisoo looked around to see if Soojoo was with anyone before realizing she wasn't.
"Well yeah silly." Soojoo smiled wide and was quick to sit next to Jisoo and put her arm around her shoulder.
"Um, well you found me." Jisoo smiled awkwardly and twisted slightly to face Soojoo, causing her arm to move away from her shoulder hesitantly. She glanced into the crowd in front of them to see if she could spot Jennie but couldn't.
"Yeah, I ran into Matthew and his new girlfriend and they said you might be over here." Soojoo leaned back on her hands and smiled down at Jisoo. "She's kind of..." Soojoo pursed her lips and looked thoughtful trying to come up with the right word.
"She's what?" Jisoo asked slightly annoyed. She liked Joy. Sure she was a little more party girl than Jisoo was, but she was nice and funny and kind of perfect for Matthew.
Soojoo noticed Jisoo's tone and knew things were already going poorly. Why were things so hard for them now? Things used to be effortless, almost perfect.
"Never mind." Soojoo forced a smile hoping desperately she could turn things around quickly. "So, do you want to hit the Ferris wheel or.."
Soojoo's face twisted into confusion and her words died off slowly as soon as she saw Jennie approaching. She quickly looked at Jisoo and noticed how quickly Jisoo's face lit up with a smile as soon as she saw the dark haired girl.
"They had pretzels or cotton candy so I took an educated guess that given the opportunity to eat something made purely of sugar, you would take it." Jennie was adjusting the food in her hands and didn't look up until after she had finished talking. Her playful smile shifting to annoyance at seeing Soojoo so close to Jisoo.
She slowly handed the cotton candy to Jisoo without saying anything else. Jisoo took it happily and took a bite before hopping off the table and stepping towards Jennie.
"Wait, did you guys come together?" Soojoo asked, poorly hiding the hurt on her face.
"Well, yeah." Jisoo shrugged. She didn't want to say more, especially after turning a would be date into a study session then trying to reverse it. She wasn't sure what words were safe to use in this moment, or why Soojoo seemed so surprised at the thought of them being there together.
Jennie raised an eyebrow and pulled off a piece of pretzel to eat silently as she watched the exchange between Jisoo and Soojoo.
"What?" Soojoo's eyes dropped to the ground and her voice was a whisper, like she was talking to herself.
"I thought I told you a bunch of us were coming together and..." Jisoo trailed off, finally catching onto what Soojoo had thought was going to happen tonight.
Soojoo sighed, "Oh my god." She turned to look away from the two girls in front of her, "I cant believe I thought.. No, instead, I get to watch first hand you two.." She couldn't even finish the sentence she was so hurt, or angry, or both.
"Seriously?" Jisoo looked from a silent Jennie to a furious Soojoo, "You're mad because, what? I am spending time with other.." friends? crushes? "...people? And, wait, cant believe you thought what?"
"Nothing." Soojoo answered immediately. Clearly aware that she had read the entire situation wrong. What she thought was going to be a night spent trying to rekindle things between Jisoo was clearly not that at all.
"Did you think that we'd run into each other here and we'd...?"
Oh man this was a mess. The kind of thing where you know you should look away but just cant. Jisoo felt awful but also kind of frustrated that Soojoo just didn't get that they weren't going to be getting back together. Jennie was trying to stay out of it but still trying to read the situation still not knowing what her and Jisoo were, or could be. And Soojoo.. well Soojoo was mad. Mostly at herself, partly at Jisoo, and for some reason, a good amount at Jennie.
Soojoo ran her hand through her hair, "No, not anymore I don't. I cant believe your nerve."
"Cant believe my nerve?" Jisoo was truly surprised by Soojoo's reaction. Her jaw dropped and her eyes went wide. "I'm not the one getting angry over nothing!"
"Well, you're not the one who got thrown over for Jennie!" Soojoo spat back angrily.
Jennie made a face at the jab but continued to stay silent, picking at her pretzel. She knew it wasn't her fight and as much as she would love to put Soojoo in her place, she had a feeling it was Jisoo that needed to do it.
"Okay, that is so unfair." Jisoo's voice didn't sound angry anymore, just annoyed. This was definitely not part of her plan for the evening.
"No, you know what?" Soojoo breathed out trying to calm herself down, "I'm not having this conversation." She ran her hand through her hair again and turned to walk away.
"Come back never." Jennie mumbled under her breath before taking another bite of her pretzel.
Soojoo turned around to glare at Jennie. She wanted to say something but the words wouldn't come. Turning her attention to Jisoo she closed her eyes for a second before opening them and looking directly at her, "Next time you see me.. Pretend you don't."
Jisoo actually looked hurt at the words. She knew things were different between them, that it would take some time to get back to being friends, but this was worse than she thought. She didn't know what to do and didn't want to say anything she would regret so instead she reached down and grabbed Jennie's wrist and started pulling her into the crowd. She looked over her shoulder and saw Soojoo storming off in the opposite direction.
Jisoo dragged Jennie along without much protest and quickly decided where she wanted to go. She needed a second to breathe without all the chaos closing in on her. Jennie had started the outing by saying there was no way she was getting on the ferris wheel, but Jisoo was sure she would make an exception right now.
"No, cupcake, stop." Jennie started to pull against Jisoo the second she realized where they were headed. Her head fell back to look at the tall wheel in front of them. The lights were blinking every color you could imagine, the carnival music and sounds of games being played in the background started to blur together as they got closer.
"Its just a ferris wheel, Jen." Jisoo didn't bother looking back or she would have seen that it wasn't just anything, and Jennie looked absolutely terrified.
"No Jisoo, I'm serious."
That should have been the sign for Jisoo to pay attention. Jennie using her actual name. It didn't happen often and when it did it was because there was a certain amount of heaviness or importance in whatever the moment was.
Jennie's throat started to feel like it was closing off and her breathing grew labored. She should have been able to pull her wrist from Jisoo's grip but as soon as Jisoo handed the operator their tickets it was like her body was no longer attached to her brain and all she could do was panic without being able to act on it.
Before she knew it she was sitting in the seat, a bar being clamped over her lap and the contraption was jerking forward, her seat swinging and lifting at the same time.
Shit shit shit was all that was going through Jennie's mind. With every wrench forward her seat made, her grip on the bar over her lap tightened. Her knuckles were white and her hands already hurt from how tightly she was holding on and it had barely been a minute. Her eyes were clamped shut and she was trying to remind herself to actually breathe. This was already embarrassing enough, passing out would only add to it.
"Oh my gosh, she hates me."
Jisoo could have been talking this whole time, Jennie wasn't sure. This is the first time her voice cut through the panic and even though Jisoo clearly had no idea what was going on yet, her voice somehow made the panic in Jennie's chest lessen.
"I mean I said maybe i'd see her here not, ambush me and we can—" Jisoo turned to Jennie and finally saw how stiff her body was, "Jen? You ok?"
Jennie eyes were shut tight and her breathing was actually at a good pace finally and it didn't feel like her lungs were collapsing. She opened her mouth to reply but the words got stuck in her throat. No she wasn't ok. This is exactly why she had started this night out by saying she wouldn't set foot on this death trap.
Jisoo suddenly felt awful. Jennie had tried to tell her she didn't want to get on the ferris wheel but in her moment of rage she hadn't listened. More than that, she completely ignored her. She leaned forward to see how far up they were, thinking maybe it wasn't too late to stop the ride and get off, but the movement rocked their bench and Jennie's hands tightened on the rail and she shifted quickly and nervously trying to lean back and stop the sudden forward movement.
"Sorry! Sorry!" Jisoo leaned back, trying to stop the swinging and slid her hand over to where Jennie's was gripping the bar and gently placed hers on top of Jennie's, "Its ok, I promise."
Jennie swallowed hard and without thinking let go of the railing and turned her hand over, lacing her fingers with Jisoo's.
Jisoo's eyes went wide watching their hands clasp together and she was grateful Jennie's eyes were closed so she wouldn't see the scarlet hue of her face. She lowered their hands to her lap and brushed her thumb along Jennie's hand in what she hoped was a soothing manner.
"I'm sorry, I didn't think you were that serious." Jisoo was watching Jennie and felt helpless in this situation. She couldn't stop the ride, she couldn't get them back on the ground, and she had no clue how to make Jennie feel better. "I didn't know you would.. I just didn't know."
"Its fine." Jennie was finally able to breathe out through a tense jaw. Her whole body was starting to hurt with how tight her muscles were and she couldn't figure out how to relax them.
"As soon as we pass the operator I'll make him stop the ride so we can get off." Jisoo leaned forward again to check their height before remembering that it would make them swing.
"Cupcake." Jennie's grip tightened on Jisoo's hand, "Just stop moving."
"Ok." Jisoo whispered, leaning back into place. This was definitely hurting her 2 step plan of making this an awesome night with Jennie. She let out a sigh and dropped her head backwards to let it rest on the back of their seat when she suddenly got an idea. Sure they were pretty high up and moving excruciatingly slow, but maybe she could distract Jennie enough that it wouldn't be so bad.
"Hey Jen?" Jisoo asked quietly, looking over at Jennie.
She was taking deep breaths and even with her eyes closed she looked like she was concentrating. Her head turned slightly at the sound of Jisoo's voice and the tension on her face lessened a bit. Something Jisoo considered a good thing.
"Hmm?" Jennie hummed out, afraid if she tried to speak the words would get stuck again. She lessened the tightness of her grip on Jisoo's hand but still kept it firmly in her own.
"I was just noticing— well its dark out now and I was wondering if you could show me where the big spoon is?" Jisoo smiled as soon as the obvious fear on Jennies face shifted to confusion.
"The what?" She asked with a scoff.
"The big spoon." Jisoo slowly scooted a little closer, trying desperately not to rock their seat. "You know, in the stars?"
They were nearing the top of the ferris wheel. It had been a slow ride so far, mostly from constantly stopping to let riders on or off. They hadn't made a full circle yet, or even made it half way.
"You mean the big dipper?" Jennie's eyes opened and she looked over at Jisoo amused.
Jisoo's smile widened as soon as dark eyes were locked on hers. Distracting her was working, and what better way than to let Jennie prove how much smarted she was than Jisoo.
"Right, that." Jisoo chuckled and kept playing along. She knew what the big dipper was. And how to find it. She actually knew a lot more about constellations than she was letting on. Thanks to a freshman astronomy class, she could probably give Jennie a run for her money, but decided if playing clueless was helping ease the fear, it wouldn't hurt to keep up the charade.
Jennie took a deep breath and tried to swallow down the remaining nervousness. Maybe if she didn't think about how high she was, it wouldn't be as scary. Just focus on the brightness of the stars. Just focus on Jisoo. Same thing, really.
"Alright." Jennie leaned her head back and slowly let go of her death grip on the railing in front of them and lifted her free hand to point above them. "See those 4 stars there? Those form the bowl of the Big Dipper."
"Oh, right, I see it now." Jisoo wasn't even looking at the stars though, she was watching Jennie. Relieved that the scared expression that was there just moments ago was slowly melting away as her eyes searched the stars above them. "What about the little dipper?"
Jennie's lips twitched up into a crooked smile. She could feel Jisoo's eyes on her and knew what she was doing. Before anything else could happen, the ferris wheel jolted to a stop, their seat swinging haphazardly because of it. Jennie eyes clamped shut once more, her hand going back to gripping the lap bar.
Jisoo frowned and gave Jennie's hand a squeeze before scooting closer once more. Their bodies pressed together, Jisoo tried to unlock their hands so she could put her arm around Jennie, hoping that if she held onto her tightly, it would help somehow.
The release of her hand made Jennie eyes open quickly and her head turn towards Jisoo.
"Don't." Jennie whispered, "Don't let go?"
Jisoo immediately tightened her grip on Jennie's hand and shook her head, "Never."
Jennie swallowed hard and nodded back, licking her lips and keeping her eyes locked on Jisoo. She knew with anyone else she would be embarrassed for relying so much on the support of someone else. But the look in Jisoo's eyes made her feel ok for needing her in that moment.
"Thanks," She breathed out a slow breath, "I just don't like heights."
"Thats ok." Jisoo shrugged with a smile, "I don't like spiders."
Jennie chuckled and immediately felt lighter. Her hand gripping the lap bar let go and she rubbed her palm on her thigh, keeping her eyes on Jisoo's goofy smile. She really was the most adorable thing Jennie had ever seen.
"No, I'm serious." Jisoo's face was serious and she turned slightly so her knee was pressing into Jennie's thigh, "I found one in the corner of my room and I looked away for one second, seriously one second, and when i looked back it was gone." She shook her head at the memory, "I couldn't sleep in my room for a week."
Jennie gave her a small smile, "How old were you?"
"Oh this was a week ago." Jisoo smiled, "I only went back to my room because Lisa was such a blanket hog."
Jennie let out a laugh, her shoulders shaking loosely and her head dropping forward a bit as she tried to hide her smile a bit.
"Feeling better?" Jisoo smiled at her, trying to ignore the flutter in her stomach at Jennie's laugh and knowing she was the cause of it.
"A bit." Jennie looked up at her, "Thank you."
Jisoo shrugged and glanced back up towards the sky, "You shouldn't be thanking me, its my fault we are up here in the first place."
"Its not so bad with you." Jennie said it before she knew it and blamed it on the height and not being able to filter her thoughts and stay calm at the same time.
Jisoo's lips pressed together before she bit her bottom lip to try to keep from smiling, "You know, I never understood why falling stars were lucky. Wouldn't they be the opposite of lucky? Falling from the sky and everything." She looked back up into the sky. It seemed she enjoyed those lights better than the flashing ones below them. There was something about sharing the sky with the stars, and Jennie.
Jennie took another breath, her lungs feeling free and the tightness in her chest no longer from panic, but from feeling Jisoo's thumb brush gently across her skin. She looked up in the same direction Jisoo's eyes were, "Maybe they are the lucky ones because they are doing more than what everyone has told them they are meant to do."
"Burning into nothing?" Jisoo asked, scooting closer to Jennie so their bodies were pressed together. With the sun down and being up in the air unprotected, she was starting to feel the briskness of the fall air.
"The rest of the stars are fixed, set to stay in the sky where they shine. Maybe the ones that fall, the ones that burn out brightly are the lucky ones precisely for that reason." Jennie glanced over at Jisoo out of the corner of her eye, relaxing more and more at the closeness they were sharing. "They burn so brightly that the sky can't hold them back."
"Interesting." Jisoo whispered as she leaned her head on Jennie's shoulder slowly, still keeping her eyes on the sky.
Something was different up on top of the Ferris wheel. Maybe it was nerves, the stars or the cold air- but suddenly everything felt lighter. It felt natural to be so close to Jennie, holding her hand and resting on her shoulder.
The way she was talking was so different than normal. Unguarded and thoughtful. It reminded her of their day spent at the junk yard. It was so relaxed, no pressure.
"If you think about it, it's the falling stars we wish on." Jennie continued, turning her head slightly to breathe in Jisoo who was now so close to her she could practically feel her body buzzing because of it. "They are the stars that make us think of our wishes and dreams. Maybe they are lucky simply for that. For inspiring something in people that are millions of miles away."
Jisoo smiled and tilted her head slightly to look at Jennie's face, "You're kind of a sap."
Jennie scoffed like she was offended, "I am not." She lifted her shoulder, bumping Jisoo from her place on top of it.
"You so are." Jisoo smiled sitting up.
Jennie frowned through a smile and glared playfully at Jisoo.
"But I like it." Jisoo grinned at her before bumping her knee against Jennie's leg.
Their ferris wheel ride had started up again during their conversation and must have finished getting a new set of riders onboard because it was now rotating at a regular pace instead of stopping and starting abruptly. They were nearing the bottom and Jisoo was trying to decide if she should ask the operator to stop the ride so she and Jennie could get off.
Before she had time to make a choice they were passing the bottom and Jennie didn't even seem to notice.
"So why photography?" Jisoo asked as they started moving upwards again. Talking had seemed to keep Jennie distracted enough before, hopefully it would work again.
"What do you mean?" Jennie must have noticed they were moving higher cause her voice wasn't as steady and her eyes were looking straight ahead.
"Well I saw your sketch and you're really good. Like, you could probably sell your art if you wanted good." Jisoo didn't want to let go of Jennie's hand but was starting to get cold. She used her free hand to rub quickly up and down her arm, trying to create heat from the friction. "So why photography instead of art?"
Jennie considered the question carefully for a moment, "I actually took art so I'd be better at photography."
They were nearing the bottom again, having made their way past the top once more and Jennie let go of Jisoo's hand.
Jisoo frowned at the loss of Jennie's hand but figured she was ready to get off the Ferris wheel. She hadn't wanted to get on in the first place and no amount of flirting or talking was going to keep her on longer than she had to be.
When they passed the operator once more Jisoo turned towards Jennie surprised and saw her pulling her jacket off her shoulders.
"With art, you get to create a world." She pulled her jacket off and twisted in her seat and reached over to put it around Jisoo's shoulders, "With photography, you get to find the beauty in a world already created." Jennie tugged on the collar of her jacket once it was around Jisoo's shoulders and smiled at the smaller girl.
Jisoo gripped the edges of the jacket and pulled it tighter around her while offering a quiet 'thanks' as her eyes dropped to her lap, sure that her cheeks were red.
Jennie pulled her beanie from her back pocket and pulled it over her wild curls.
"Being forced to create something worth looking at, makes me appreciate everything already around me more." Jennie leaned back into the seat just as they were reaching the top again. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, trying not to panic like she had before.
A hand slipped into hers and fingers gripped gently. Jennie opened her eyes and saw Jisoo's hand laced with her own on her lap and let out a slow breath.
"I like that." Jisoo looked out over the carnival below them, "Creating beauty so you can learn to appreciate beauty already created."
They were nearing the bottom slowly and this time they would probably be getting off. There had been a few stops of the ferris wheel already, no doubt emptying the cars just before theirs. Jisoo felt disappointed knowing once they step out of their little seat whatever was going on would probably change. For some reason being scared had helped Jennie open up more than normal and she just knew as soon as her feet were firmly on the ground, the walls would come back up.
The ride came to a halt and the seat swayed a little but for the first time Jennie didn't squeeze Jisoo's hand tighter from being scared. Instead she slowly let go and reached for her back pocket while the operator unlatched the lap rail and opened it up to let them out.
Jisoo stood up but felt Jennie grip onto her hand gently and pull it back towards her. She turned around to see Jennie still sitting, her free hand reaching forward with a strip of tickets between her fingers.
"How about one more go around?" Jennie smiled at Jisoo while the operator took the tickets and waited for Jisoo to sit back down.
"You sure?" Jisoo asked, sitting down and holding onto the lap bar once it was back in place.
"I'm sure." Jennie smiled as she slipped her hand back into Jisoo's, "So why journalism?"
The ride jerked forward and Jennie's cool demeanor switched to scared once more. Jisoo couldn't help but chuckle at the sight. This bad ass girl trying to be cool but failing every time the ferris wheel moved. Jisoo gave Jennie's hand a squeeze, scooted closer to her and just looked at her for a second.
Eyes closed, slow breaths and furrowed brows... she was adorable when she was scared.
——
They ended up paying for 2 more rounds on the ferris wheel and probably would have gone for a third if they had any tickets left. They talked about random things mostly. Classes, psychology, the stars... and enjoyed the comfortable silence that surrounded them between topics. It was nice, just being. And by the end it felt like Jennie was holding Jisoo's hand purely because she wanted to, and not because she was scared.
Jisoo nearly tripped as she stepped off the ferris wheel, but thankfully Jennie still had a hold of her hand and held her upright.
"See that wasn't so bad, was it?" Jisoo asked as they walked through the crowd, completely aware that Jennie hadn't yet let go of her hand.
"Yeah, ok." Jennie rolled her eyes, "Once I got over the idea of plunging to my death it was a real treat."
Jisoo laughed and was about to say something witty (at least she thought so) when she heard her name being yelled over the noise of the carnival.
"Chaeyoung?" Jisoo questioned, looking through the people surrounding them.
"Of course." Jennie muttered as soon as the pair broke through the crowd with Matthew and Joy close behind.
"There you are!" Chaeyoung looked relived to have found them until she saw their hands joined together and her eyes just about popped out of her head.
Jisoo saw the reaction and let go of Jennie's hand and walked up to Lisa who was leaning over, her hands clutching their stomach. "What happened?"
"I tried to tell her I can eat a lot. Like, I win all the eating contests at the Zeta house. But she just kept trying to beat me." Matthew shrugged as she stepped up and clapped a hand on Lisa's shoulder.
Lisa lurched forward and groaned in discomfort. "I'm gonna hurl."
Jisoo grimaced and turned to Chaeyoung with questioning eyes.
"Someone decided that eating 2 hot dogs, a bag of popcorn, a piece of pizza and then a giant slushy was a good idea." Chaeyoung crossed her arms over her chest and looked at Lisa pointedly. "That same someone decided it was a brilliant idea to follow the smorgasbord by going on the tilt-a-whirl."
"It was not a brilliant idea." Lisa groaned again and clutched tighter to her stomach.
"Matthew said he could give us a ride home since its on the way to his place." Chaeyoung uncrossed her arms and reached over and took hold of one of Lisa's. "So you get that side, i'll get this one, and hopefully we make it home before they throw up every carnival food known to man."
Jisoo gave Jennie an apologetic look before she reluctantly took hold of Lisa's free side to help hold them upright and looked back at Jennie. "Hold on guys."
Letting go of Lisa she ran back over to Jennie and wrapped her arms around her neck. Jennie went still for a moment, not knowing what to do. Finally her brain caught up with what was happening and she wrapped her arms around Jisoo's waist gently and pulled her tighter into her. She could smell the scent of Jisoo's fruity shampoo and feel her breath on her neck.
Her heart thumped heavily and Jennie felt like Jisoo was holding her so close, she wasn't sure who's heart was being inside her chest.
Jisoo pulled back slowly but kept her arms around Jennie's neck, "Thanks for coming, I had fun." she smiled, her eyes shining brighter than the blinking carnival lights surrounding them.
"Me too." Jennie whispered, still nervous about their close proximity.
Jisoo bit her bottom lip as her eyes dropped to Jennie's for a brief second before she let go, adjusted Jennie's beanie slightly and started back towards the group waiting for her, "I'll see you Tuesday?"
"Tuesday." Jennie called after her.
Then she was gone. The lingering smell of fruity shampoo and her hand still warm from holding Jisoo's.
Maybe it hadn't been about studying at all.
——
Jisoo watched out the window while Lisa sat next to her, groaning in pain every minute or so. Chaeyoung rubbed circles on their back as they drove back to the apartment. It was a silent ride for the most part, something Jisoo was grateful for. She pulled Jennie's jacket higher around herself and smiled as she looked up at the stars filling the sky. The same stars they had looked at from the top of the Ferris wheel while Jennie held tightly to her hand.
She saw a shooting star streak across the sky and immediately closed her eyes to make a wish. She made her wish and opened her eyes with a sigh, hoping that maybe the falling ones really were lucky.
Thats when she realized Lisa was right all along.
"oh no." she whispered to herself as her head thumped against the window. She let out another sigh with a quiet grumble, "Worst. Crush. Ever."