I climbed down the ladder into the sewers following Rick he helps me down I look down the tunnel I see everyone and I see Judith I smiling, happy that she made it, I walk down the tunnel nodding to everyone, then I see someone else a new person Rick gives him a strange glance "I brought him back"I hear Carl say weakly I look to my left, he is sitting there his face pale and sweaty I kneel next to him "Hey baby girl"He says "Hey"I say "It has to happen.."He says he slowly pulls up his shirt and removes a bandage showing a bite I choke on a sob "No"I say Carl grabs my hand "Its gonna be ok"He says he kisses my hand I run my fingers through his hair not caring about how sweaty it is I kiss his forehead
1 hour later
Carl head lays on my lap I stroke his hair lightly as he sleeps we've cleaned his wound, knowing it won't do much, but It was worth a try I let my tears fall quietly I hear Rick and some of the others talking about going to the hilltop "What about him?"I ask quietly Rick kneels down in front of me hesitantly "He may not make it there"He says and pinches the bridge of his nose "We can't leave him Rick"I say my voice weak he kisses my head "It's gonna be ok"He says Carl shifts in his sleep I pretend not to notice Rick reaching for his gun I feel his forehead "God it's getting worse"I say he lets out a cough into his hand "Y/N"He says "Yeah"I say "End this..please end me"I say I bite my lip holding back a sob at his words "No I can't"I say "I don't wanna turn into one of them and I don't think I can make it any longer"He says weakly Rick nods "Are you sure Carl?"He asks trying to hold back his tears "I'm sure"Carl says weakly He grabs my hand "Take care of Judith please"he says I nod "Forget baby girl forget about me"He says I shake my head "I can't"I say "Its gonna be ok Y/N I promise"He says I kiss him one more time I feel his soft lips I cup his head "I love you so much Carl"I cry "I love you too Y/N"He says tears spilling from his eye "Close you eye Carl just try to sleep"I cry He closes his eyes relaxing "Goodnight Love"He says I take out my knife and put it to his head "Goodnight"I say
Then I end him
I let out a sob as I felt him go limp and his whole body goes pale Rick takes his body holding it close and hugging it crying Michonne helps me up and hugs me "Its ok its ok"She repeats over and over again as I sob I will never forget the boy who I loved the boy who saved me the boy who died too young.
6 months later
I sit in the corner of Carl and I's room holding a bottle of wine I take another sip as more tears fell we won the war Negan is now dead, but sadly so was Carl we won, but yet I felt like I lost I heard a knock at the door "Fuck off"I say taking another sip of wine Rick opens the door "I said fuck off"I say "How much have you drank?"He asks "Why do you care"I say "Carl wouldn't want you to this"He says "Carl is fucking dead!"I yell rick looks shocked at my words "And I can't keep going without him"I cry I close the wine bottle and stand up "Rick I've lost everything! And he was the only reason I was still breathing and now he is gone because none of us fucking realized he left because no one cared enough to not, let him go on his own!"I yell "You were so busy trying to win this war that you forgot about your own fucking son!"I scream falling to the ground in tears Rick pulls me into a hug and I let out my sobs "I can't do this anymore, Rick"I cry "Yes you can y/n I know you can he wanted you to keep going"He says "I should be with him"I cry "He wanted you here"Rick says I tighten the grip on his shirt trying to hold back another sob "I don't want to be here"I say
1 day later
I sit next to his grave the cold air, sending shivers down my spine the moonlight illuminating the night sky a sign marks Carl's grave reading "Here lies Carl Alexander Grimes Rest In Peace" "I'll be with you soon"I say I pull the gun from my holster Rick took away my gun and knives but I managed to steal one from the armory I load it and put it to my head "Goodnight Love"I say quietly then
I pull the trigger.