Btw this is the Ghost teddy if you don't watch GOT ^
Here we fucking go, last chapter for Brother's Best Friend. I hope your ready.
I love you all and can't thank you enough for all the support you've given me through this book, I'm so excited to make a second for you literally you don't understand.
Anyway, for the last time- Brother's Best Friend
-A
Chapter 95
Harry's POV
Last night was not exactly what I thought was going to happen. I didn't really go in with a game plan, I just wanted to see her. I just wanted to give her the record. I knew she wouldn't open it yet because she doesn't have a record player, I knew that. But anyway, when I saw her last night, I just felt like everything around me just slowly faded. Just slowly didn't matter anymore. After feeling like the world was against us through everything, I finally felt different in that moment. I knew everything that happened last night was just because we were both leaving, or I was leaving soon that is. I guess it was the only chance we get to have what we have without having the intrusion of everyone else and everything else for that matter.
I stir in my sleep feeling hot and bothered with all the covers and sheets pulled all over me. I huff in frustration kicking some of them off of me before rolling over to the right hand side of the bed. I reach over and frown when I felt nothing.
Emptiness.
I frown opening my eyes slightly seeing that her side of the bed was vacant. I look up sitting up seeing nothing out of place, except her.
She wasn't here.
Her clothes were gone from the bedroom floor, her phone wasn't on the side like it usually is if she goes for a shower or goes to make some breakfast. And by breakfast I mean burnt toast. She usually leaves the cooking to me, which I do not mind. I throw the covers off me as I stand up grabbing my phone off the side.
It was 2:30 pm.
I had slept nearly the full day, what the fuck? How? I remember setting an alarm last night for 11:30am because I was going to go to the charity shop to drop off some stuff I wasn't going to be taking with me to England. How could it of just turned itself off? I find my jeans after routing around my draw for a second, pulling them up over my boxers. I buckle up my belt and ruffle my hair slightly as I now look into the bathroom mirror, ready to brush my teeth.
Once I finished brushing my teeth I make my way down stairs, not bothering to put a shirt on because let's face it I was probably gonna find her eating breakfast and I knew she would appreciate the view. I'm kidding, but still.
I walk into the kitchen passing Louis, Liam, Klaus and Zac as they all sit playing video games in the living room. This was the first time I had seen Zac in a while, and I hated him nonetheless.
Prick.
"Harry, do you want a sandwich? I'm making peanut butter-" Niall asks as I see him pull out a plate from the cupboard.
She wasn't in here either.
"Uh, no thank you- Have you seen Amy?" I frown looking around skeptically.
"Uh.." he thinks for a second as he starts prepping.
"No actually I haven't, I just presumed you were both still upstairs" he says with his back turned to me as I take a seat on the stool by the island.
"No I just woke up, but she wasn't there- she never leaves without telling me, even if she just comes to sit down here whilst I sleep, she would tell me" I say trying to not think to much into the situation. She hadn't got cold feet had she? Was last night too much for her once she thought about it?
"Have you called her?" He asks and I shake my head. I mean I probably should, but if she's just next door I don't want to act like a dickhead.
"No" I mutter.
"Well are you fucking stupid? Do I need to dial her number for you?" He frowns looking back at me before he rolls his eyes.
I flip him off before pulling my phone out of my pocket, dialling her number instantly.
"The person you are calling is unable to take your call right now. Please leave your mess-"
"Voicemail" I sigh pulling the phone away from me. I surely shouldn't be worried as of right now. She's probably just at home.
"She probably went home for a shower or something, maybe she has work? I don't know" Niall shrugs but I don't say anything. I knew she had quit her job now seen as she was leaving so that wouldn't be it. Maybe she was just in the shower? I don't know.
"Do you want this sandwich or not?" He turns to me offering the plate out to me. I nod before standing up.
"Thanks mate" I smile as I take a bite from the sand which as I pull it from the plate before heading off toward the living room.
"Dude, your shirt!" Niall yells and I roll my eyes.
"Don't need it!" I yell back laughing lightly as I jog into the living room.
"Louis you idiot!" I hear Liam yell at Louis as I enter the living room.
"Shut the fuck up Payno, I know what I'm doing" Louis snaps back at him making me laugh lightly.
"Oi-" Klaus catches my attention causing me to turn around as I pull my trainers on.
"Where are you off?" He asks.
"Did you get birthday sex last night Harry?" Louis teases making my eyes widen.
"Ow!" He frowns when Klaus punches him in the arm immediately. To be honest he kinda did ask for that.
"That's my sister" Klaus groans but Louis turns to me with a smirk still waiting on a reply.
How was I going to admit in front of Klaus that actually I did sleep with his sister last night, five times may I add.
That was not going to happen.
"Uh- I Uh.." I stutter awkwardly not really knowing what to say. I watch as the lads laugh loudly just as Klaus' eyes widen as he looks at me.
"I feel sick" He grumbles hiding his face in his hands.
"Sorry..." I scratch the back of my neck awkwardly as the laughter begins to die down. I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole right now.
"Where are you going anyway?" Liam changes the subject slightly.
"To find Amy, you've not seen her have you?" I ask as I take a bite out of my sandwich.
"Uh no actually I haven't, Not since last night" Liam says and I nod looking to the others.
"Nah Sorry mate" Klaus shakes his head just as Louis pipes up.
"She's probably still recovering from last night mate, if you know what I mean" Louis teases making my eyes widen as the rest of them laugh.
"Oh my god..." Klaus mutters hiding his head in his hands again.
"Yeah come on we've all heard the two of you! Your like fucking animals" Louis laughs loudly. Oh my god I wanted to kill him.
"Loud would be an understatement" Liam joins in and I glare at him.
"Am not-" I try to argue.
"No but she is!" Louis laughs making even Klaus laugh lightly. To be honest she was loud but I didn't think I was.
"Oh Harry..." Louis mocks making my eyes widen but yet I can't help the smirk fall onto my lips. He was so right.
"Right I'm out!" Klaus quickly jumps up just as Niall enters the room.
"What are we talking about?" Niall asks making me roll my eyes. Oh god here we go. Luckily Klaus had left at this point.
"How loud Harry and Amy are" Louis smirks looking from me to Niall causing me to narrow my eyes at him. I knew Niall would have something to say.
"Oh god, really? It's fucking disgusting" Niall groans with a mouthful of sandwich as he sits down in Klaus' spot on the couch.
"To be fair, can you blame her when your shoving your dick inside her" Louis jokes and I roll my eyes as the others nod in agreement.
"It's fucking huge!" He adds.
"God do I feel sorry for her" Niall sighs and I laugh lightly.
I wasn't that big, come on..
"Your both disgusting" I laugh lightly.
"Is she good Harry?" Louis asks as I head towards the front door. Did he really just ask me that? Like I would actually tell him.
"What? I'm not fucking answering that!" I yell at him pretty shocked he would even dare.
"That's a yes then" Niall laughs making the rest of the laugh.
"Fuck off" I glare at him just as I open the front door.
"Come back!" Louis shouts as Niall and Liam literally piss themselves laughing for some reason.
"Fuck off!" I yell before shutting the door behind me.
Why the hell was I even friends with them?
——————
I open the door to the girls house without knocking like I usually do seeing Eva in a shirt and knickers eating waffles. Typical.
"Oh my god, Harry!- Knock!" She quickly throws a blanket over her bare legs making me roll my eyes as she yells at me. God like I haven't seen some legs before?
"Oh my god, Eva!- No" I mock her rolling my eyes as I shut the door behind me. She rolls her eyes at me flipping me off as I walk toward her.
"Is Amy here?" I ask looking around, noticing the quietness of the house. It seemed like no one was here at all.
"You need to learn how to put a shirt on, I feel violated" she groans rolling her eyes at me.
"And What do you mean is she here? Why would she be here?" She frowns looking at me with a mouthful of waffle. What the hell is she talking about?
"She lives here, that's why she would be here" I roll my eyes at her.
She looks at me skeptically for a second for some reason before dropping the fork onto the plate.
"Are you being serious?" She gapes at me speaking softly. What the hell was wrong with her?
"What?" I frown looking at her in confusion.
"Your not serious right?" She looks at me laughing lightly shaking her head.
"Why would I be joking?" I keep a stern face.
"What?" She frowns and immediately stopped laughing.
"Harry seriously.." She says wearily making me feel off for some reason.
"What is wrong with you?" I ask.
"You honestly don't know?" She sighs looking at me in disbelief.
"Don't know what?" I frown getting frustrated.
"Woah wait a minute, she didn't tell you?" She gets up off the couch and for some reason I start to get this bad feeling.
"Tell me what?" I press.
She laughs lightly shaking her head looking to floor in disbelief making me feel oddly on edge.
"She said she did-" she stops herself shaking her head.
"But you- Oh god..." she breathes out closing her eyes clearly frustrated with something.
"Is she okay? Has something happened?" I step towards her concern written all over my face.
"No- I mean.." she stops looking up at me.
"I thought you knew.." she sighs, sympathy oozing out of her making me feel awfully confused.
"Thought I knew what?" I sigh, feeling nervous.
"I'm sorry-"
"What are you-"
"Sh-She Uh.. She's gone" She cuts me off looking away from me. What? Where? What did she mean?
"Where?" I press. Surely she didn't mean-
"No Harry I mean-" she looks up at me.
"Gone, as in left" she adds.
"For Stanford" she sighs and I feel my heart fall out of my chest.
"Wh-" I couldn't even speak before I feel my legs take over, carting me up the stairs without a second thought.
"Harry wait-" I ignore Eva's calls as I get to the top of the stairs, I run into Amy's room swinging the door open immediately.
Empty.
I felt my chest ache as I didn't believe what was happening to me.
I step into the empty room looking around as I feel the walls seemingly get further and further away.
That's when I see it.
I walk over to the window seat, seeing something that made my heart ache straight away.
I pick up 'Ghost', the teddy bear wolf I had given her just as a see a note attached to him.
She would never have left this. I knew how much this little stupid wolf meant to her.
I pull the note off Ghost, opening it up straight away. Her handwriting made me cringe knowing exactly why she would write this.
Dear Harry,
By the time you read this you'll probably be very upset and angry with me, and trust me I get why, I don't blame you. Before I start, I want to tell you that I never planned this, I never planned to leave like this but I guess this was the only way I could.
I probably re-wrote this letter 40 to 50 times to get it right without fucking up. Stupid? I know, but I did. I never deserved you. Ever since that day in the city you just kept on surprising me. You proved me wrong. You made me realise that you weren't the person I thought you were. You were so much more than that. So much more than I deserve. I know I never told you how I really felt a lot, so I guess if I say it now it's better late then never?
I've never met anyone in my life who made me feel the way I feel about you. I know you probably don't want to hear this but I loved you Harry. I love you. More than I said I did, that's why I couldn't say goodbye to you. I couldn't say it. Not to you. I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry for being this selfish but I couldn't bring myself to let you go. Not entirely.
That's why you deserve better. That's why I don't want you to wait for me. That's why you deserve better because I will never be enough for you. I can't be the person you need me to be for you. You helped me through so much and I feel like I only dragged you down. You need someone who puts you before themselves. You need someone who isn't me.
I'll be fine.
Don't worry about me.
I need to focus on myself and as of right now, I can't have you in my life when I do that. Your family need you. Your Dad needs you. More than I do. That's what you need to focus on right now.
Please don't think I left not being in love with you because god Harry do I fucking love you. I fucking love you so much Harry, that's why I'm doing this. I need to let you go and this is me trying to do that for you. And for me.
Maybe a part of me wishes things weren't like this. Maybe a part of me wishes that I could spend the rest of my life with you. Maybe a part of me wishes we would of had a family together, maybe two boys and a girl, like you wanted? Maybe a part of me wishes we would of got that micro pig you begged me for. But for now I know that's not going to happen. I need to except that.
But I can't do that with you in my life.
I love you and but I need to let you go.
And this is me letting you go.
Please stay exactly the way you are Harry. I couldn't be anymore proud of the man your becoming. Your going to make someone really happy one day and they are going to be the luckiest girl in the world (or guy if you decide to swing both ways I don't know?).
I'm kidding.
Probably shouldn't of said that, but I'm not about to re-write this for the 51st time.
Anyway I have to go.
I have so much more I wish I could say to you, but maybe it gives me a reason to see you again?
One day.
I don't know.
Please don't try to come after me or contact me, I don't need this to be any harder than it already is.
Please take care of Ghost for me and I thought you probably deserved your ring back too, you might need it some day. It really is beautiful, just like you.
Anyway, I love you always.
- A x
Ps- You will always be my first and last love.
And with that, I knew I had lost her.
I just prayed she had got my note.
—————————
END OF BOOK 1