Harry looped his arm with Louis, their fingers lacing together in a vine like grip, and together they made their way up onto the stage. They had thrown a little party today, leading people to believe it was for no other reason than a belated celebration party, when in reality they were going to share their big news today.
It had been a little over a two weeks since Louis had burst into Harry's office and told him the news of their child. Which means it has also been two weeks since their fight. They haven't talked about it at all. Every time Louis would try to bring it up, Harry would either leave or just ignore him completely. He had gave up on shouting at him because Louis was immune to it, apparently. He hadn't punished Louis since that day, either. He didn't want to be the sick monster Louis thought him to be. So he just stopped everything all together. Talking, physical contact, eye contact, punishments, and sex.
He was withdrawing all together, leaving Louis alone like the boy had wished those many weeks ago. He was just giving him what he wanted. If Harry didn't acknowledge him, then he wouldn't be able to hurt him. It was as simple as that.
"First off, we would like to thank you all for coming," Harry began, sweat already trickling down his forehead. He felt uncomfortable now, with all their eyes pinned on him as he held Louis' hand. Their was photographers here, and news reporters were fanned out across the room, apparently excited to catch Louis and Harry out in public together for the first time since they were wed.
People began clapping and cheering, forcing Harry to smile. He needed to act like he was happy. When they quieted down, Harry smiled yet another fake smile and turned to look at Louis for a second. "But we didn't call you out here for a simple celebration. We have some exciting news to share with all of you," he said, squeezing Louis' hand and nodding slightly, letting him know it was time for him to deliver the news.
Louis didn't like that Harry was ignoring him, but he figured it was better than being punished and being treated like shit. He desperately wanted to help Harry. Because he knew this wasn't going to last if this continued. He knew that their child would suffer mentally if this continued. He just wished Harry would see that. He kept trying to bring up the therapist thing, but Harry wouldn't listen to him at all. It was a good idea, them seeing a therapist separately and then seeing one together to help improve their marriage. Louis thought it was a good compromise.
Louis stood in front of the microphone and smiled. "We're expecting." Louis said, seeing the crowd gasped. "I am almost 9 weeks along and next week is our appointment to see the baby on ultrasound for the first time. I hope you're just excited as I am."
Harry smiled warmly, such a heartfelt smile that it made his face shine with happiness and pride. "By next year, I will have an heir!" Harry boomed, chest inflating when everybody began to cheer. One thing he had to offer this child was a marriage to only the best family. He, she, or they, were a Styles heir, destined to do great like their father. They would be expected to live up to the world's expectations, and exceed far past their father was ever able to. But they would have the entire UK there, cheering them on and supporting them; letting them know that they had an entire family that loved them.
Louis smiled wide at Harry and looked at the crowd. He was scared for the child, growing up in this world. He hoped someday, somehow the government would change and people wouldn't have to be married off and forced to be together. He hoped for that day, hoping he could raise his children in that world. But he knew that was never going to happen.
"Congratulations, son," Desmond Styles said as soon as Harry stepped down off the stage, Louis still beside him. He was pulled into a half hug, and words only he could hear were whispered in his ear. "I trust you will make the right decision and raise this child properly. Regardless of gender, it will need to know it's place and how it is to act," Desmond grinned darkly when he pulled back, staring expectantly at his son. Harry's lips pulled over his teeth in a forced grin and he nodded, suppressing the urge to bash his father's face against his knee.
He would never raise his child the way he was raised, and he would die before his father ever laid a hand on his child, or pounded the same, fierce mantra he had into Harry's head. Men don't cry. They feel nothing. You will feel nothing. "Of course, father," Harry said through clenched teeth. He knew his place, and knew questioning or arguing with his father was not something he was to do. His father was his elder, and was to be respected.
Louis furrowed his eyebrows at Desmond and Harry's interaction. But he clicked two and two together and realized that Des was probably the main reason Harry was the way he was. Why Harry wouldn't let his guard down. He frowned at the sight of the man. He looked like an asshole. He didn't like that. He hoped that someday Harry would open up to him. He was waiting for that day.
Harry was grateful, for once, that people came up to him and began blabbing their mouths. It gave him an excuse to get away from his father without being told he was being disrespectful. After about an hour of hearing every form of congratulations a person could possibly hear, and having more than one body pressed against his in an awkward hug, Louis and Harry were pulled off to the side for some exclusive photos. The couple happily complied. Harry stood with perfect poster, a dazzling smile on his face. His arm was wrapped around Louis' waist and Louis' arms encircled Harry's waist, his head resting on Harry's chest.
To anybody looking, they would appear as a happy couple, even possibly in love. But then there was Jay, standing off to the side of them, out of the camera's view, with a knowing, sympathetic look on her face. She felt bad for both boys, knowing that their entire lives would be broadcasted to the world for the rest of their lives. Nothing would be kept private, and for a split second, she understood why Harry had acted the way he did. He valued the little privacy he did get, so when Louis told her about their problems, Harry lost a little bit of his privacy.
She still didn't agree to it, of course. She didn't agree to any sort of spousal abuse. But she could understand it now as she looked around the room, seeing as the cameras flashing, all the people watching. Too many people take their privacy for granted, forgetting that there are some people like Harry, and now Louis, who had to make sure they were on their very best behavior while out in public. Otherwise, a small slip up, and their lives would be tore apart and their every movement would be watched with expectant eyes, waiting for more, always expecting more.
Louis smiled wide, it was obviously fake for the pictures. He wished Harry and him were closer. But he knew he somehow ruined that. He just wanted to help Harry. But he wasn't going to give up no matter what. Louis looked towards his mum and bit his lip. He knew that she could see under everything. He also wished the cameras would go away. He hated them. Now that they knew he was pregnant, they were going to be relentless.
They were just asked to do another pose when Harry got this sudden ache in his gut. It was sharp, like dull knifes stabbing him repeatedly, with a twisting sensation. He didn't like the feeling at all, but his eyes were still trying to adjust from the numerous bright flashes from the camera, so when he looked around he couldn't see much. Then out of the corner of his eye he seen Tom, his head security guard, say something into his wrist microphone before he began walking towards Harry, his face showing no sign of what was wrong, but his stance showed it was serious.
Eyes had been pinned on Harry this entire night, but along with the gut ache, he felt something else... Someone else's gaze burning holes into him. It didn't feel right. Then it happened...
A single shot rang out, and just as Harry twisted in the direction of the noise, something hit his shoulder, going past the layer of his clothes, and leaving a sharp, stinging pain as it dug deeper and deeper into his flesh. "LOUIS!" He shouted, his panicked voice getting lost in the sea of screams. He jerked to the right and on instinct threw his body over Louis' just as another shot rang out, embedding in the wall Harry was standing in front of moments ago.
He was breathing heavily, his arms squeezing tightly around Louis' body. The room had erupted in chaos, and he could hear people screaming, but all he seemed to be able to focus on was the screaming boy beneath him. "Are you alright?" Harry asked in a gruff voice, Louis easily being able to hear him because the way Harry was hunched over him, shielding his entire body, made it so Harry's lips were right next to his ear.
Louis noticed how Harry looked different. He could see the look in his eyes how worried he looked. He didn't understand why. He stayed close to Harry, seeing Harry look around nervously. He heard the gunshot and screamed, looking up at Harry to make sure he was okay, not noticing the blood seeping through the clothes around his shoulder. He didn't want to lose Harry, he couldn't lose Harry. He let out a cry when he saw the bullet hit the wall. He breathed heavily, his breathing picking up quickly. He was panicking. Louis screamed and shook his head, crying hard. "N-No. I don't want to lose you." Louis cried and clung onto Harry. "Please don't let me go. I'm sorry. I love you just please don't let me go." He cried. "Can't lose you." He sobbed. He slowly calmed down, feeling safe in Harry's arms.
Harry didn't say anything to Louis, or comment on what he was saying. Fear made people say things they never would, things they hadn't even thought about prior to the moment their life was threatened. He just held him, and waited for the hand that tapped his shoulder moments later. "Take him out, now," Harry growled, quickly passing Louis over to the men who now surrounded him. Instantly, Louis was standing in the middle of a diamond, four men surrounding him as they led him outside.
"How the hell could you allow this to happen?" Harry growled to Tom, who stood next to him. It was in that moment that he became aware of the pain in his shoulder, and when he actually acknowledged it, he felt as the pain rippled throughout his shoulder, ceasing in his clenched fingertips. Blood stained his grey suit, and the red stain continued to grow in size.
Louis stood and shook his head. "No. Harry don't leave me I want to stay with you. Please." Louis begged. "Please don't leave me. No!" Louis whimpered as the men held onto him, leading him outside. "I just want you Harry! Come on!" Louis whimpered and continued to squirm under the man's grip. He just wanted Harry and to feel safe in his arms. His feelings for Harry were so confusing. One minute he wanted Harry, the next he didn't. But deep down he cared for Harry so much. And deep down he wanted Harry to care about him and feel the same way he did.
"I thought you had this under control!" Harry growled when Tom informed him the shooter must have snuck in during their announcement, when the security team was watching Harry rather than the exits. He hasn't had an attack for months now! The last one he did have had been in public as well, and he was hoping the people who wanted to kill him watched as the man who tried to stab Harry had two bullets put into his chest on live television. He was hoping they would realize it was a suicide attempt.
"I'm sorry, sir," Tom said, head bowed in disappointment. "The suspect fled the scene before our men could grab him. We're thinking he's a professional hit man."
Harry nodded and growled at the new found information. "I want him found!" He said harshly, then turned to the people who were still absolutely terrified, but calming down now. "I would like to apologize for what happened tonight," Harry said, going on to inform everybody that the shooter was no longer in the building, and that they were safe but the party was over. Somewhere during his speech, Tom had snuck off the stage and disappeared in the crowd. He was a tall man with bulging arms, weighing in at about two hundred and fifty pounds though ninety percent of that weight was pure muscle. He has been with Harry for six years, the man being the first security guard, or Hunter is what most people refer to them as, Harry had acquired when he was chosen for the position he got. He was a very valuable asset Harry not only respected, but cared for.
Louis was still complaining by the time he was outside and taken to a safe place. He sat with the men, who were going to keep guard of him until Harry arrived to claim him. He sniffled and rubbed his eyes. He didn't know if they were after Harry or himself. It was most likely Harry, but now him being in the public eye, he had no idea anymore. He couldn't believe he told Harry he loved him. It was a moment he replayed over in his head. Did he love Harry? He didn't know. He didn't know what love was. He knew that treating your significant other like shit wasn't love. He hoped the same thing would happen to Harry like what happened to his father. Having children changed him for the better and opened his heart to love, which made his dad fall in love with his mum. He wished his dad was still here to give Harry advice.
Harry, blood still dripping from his wound and making it appear a lot worse than it actually was, helped escort people out, assuring all of them repeatedly that his shoulder was fine. He has had worse. If anybody truly paid attention to him when he was stark naked, they would notice his scars. The ones littering his back and torso. They weren't something he hid, nor was he ashamed of the imperfect marking on his body, he just didn't go around flaunting them.
"Is Louis fine?" Harry asked as he walked up to one of his men, whose name he thinks is Cody? Or Kade? He can't be sure.
Cody looked at Harry and sighed. "He's fine. He was complaining for a while, then cried. But now he's just staring off into space and I tried to get his attention but he's in deep thought or something. He's your wife." Cody said with a sigh and looked over at Louis.
Louis looked like his eyes were dead. He was in deep thought, thinking about his life with Harry and what their baby was going to be like. He couldn't stop thinking about it now. He was worried now that this happened. He didn't want anyone to hurt their child.
Harry sighed, and mumbled some kind of colorful insult to Cody, then slowly walked up to Louis. He kneeled in front of the boy and with slow movements, so he didn't startle him, he grabbed Louis' chin between his pointer finger thumb. "Shh, it's just me," he whispered quietly when Louis jerked back. With a certain level of tenderness nobody has ever seen Harry use, he studied Louis' face, turning it this way and that way, then looked over every other visible inch of skin. Other than his lip that he has chewed raw, nothing appeared to be wrong with him and Harry let out a breath of relief he hadn't realized he was holding.
Louis looked at Harry and wrapped his arms around him once he realized it was Harry. He buried his face into Harry's neck and breathed in his scent. He felt safe in Harry's arms. "Can we please talk about it now? I don't want to avoid it anymore. I have a suggestion but you never listen to me. Please can we just talk about us?" Louis asked. "When we get home." Louis asked and looked at him. He pressed a soft kiss to his cheek and smiled.
Just because he thought the boy had been through enough tonight, Harry agreed, knowing he would be out with his men looking for his shooter as soon as Louis and his child were home safe. "Later," Harry mumbled, allowing Louis to hold onto him for a second longer before he pulled back, his shoulder screaming in protest from how tight Louis had been holding him.
Louis looked at the blood and gasped. "Oh my god. I'm sorry. I didn't know that you were hurt. Are you okay?" Louis frowned and looked at his shoulder. "Let me clean that up when we get home too." Louis said and looked up at him. "Wanna take care of you. Help with my parenting skills."
Harry cringed. "As appealing as it sounds for you to dig into my flesh to retrieve a bullet, then sew up the skin, I would much rather prefer leaving it to my doctor to handle," Harry said, knowing he should call him as soon as possible so he could get the bullet out before he got an infection. All it took was one glance at one of his men standing off to the side, and the doctor was called, already getting ready to meet Harry at his home. The man has patched Harry up more than the young man could count, but Harry always made sure to transfer more than enough funds to cover their "appointment" into the older man's account after he was finished. Just to show how deep his level of gratitude was without needing words to show it. He had never been good at speaking his feelings clearly, anyway.
"Oh I didn't know it was that bad. Thought it was just a graze." Louis said and frowned. "Were they after you or both of us? Because I don't want our child to get hurt." Louis said. "I can't stop thinking about it. It terrifies me." Louis sighed and rubbed his stomach. "I can't wait to see our baby for the first time at our doctor's appointment. You're coming right?"
Harry was getting whiplash. In a minute flat Louis jumped between three different topics, and emotions! It amazed Harry how calm he seemed to be, and how, aside from worrying about their child's well being, he was handling what had just happened so well. "It's not bad, they were after me, most likely, and of course," Harry said, answering all three questions before smiling up at Louis. He knew he had this certain level of charm that could, at any given moment, calm anybody down, no matter the situation. And despite how... Well put together looked, Harry could only imagine what it was like on the inside of the boy's head.
Louis smiled. "Great. I really wouldn't want you to miss it." He said and smiled. Louis was scared on the inside, but he faked it by continuously talking and making it seem like he was okay. Louis' mind was dark. It always was. It wasn't a happy place to be and Louis didn't know how to change that. One minute he was happy, the next he was crying and then he would get angry. That's why he thought them both seeing a therapist would both be beneficial for them. He hoped when he talked to Harry about it that he would agree and end up going.
Harry, oblivious to what was going on in Louis' head, grabbed his hand and they both walked over to the car that crawled to a stop at the curb. Men surrounded them, and as much as Harry hated being treated like a child who needed protection, he knew it was necessary, and his men would be like this for the next month, even if Harry insisted they back off. It just wasn't in their nature. They served to protect. Harry was their master, more or less.
Louis walked with Harry, watching Harry's face as they walked. He wondered how Harry felt right now. He didn't seem worried anymore, and didn't act like he was in pain, but he still looked.. lost. He couldn't find a good word to describe it. He frowned as all the men showed up to protect them. He really just wanted a moment alone with Harry. Louis climbed into the car with Harry and sighed. He didn't want to ever go out into public again. He just wanted to stay inside, where he was safe.
Harry kept his torso twisted so his shoulder didn't touch his seats, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't relax. The excitement of what had happened has worn off by now, and all he was left with was the cruel reality that he very well could have lost both Louis and his child tonight. It was an unsettling realization, one that made his heart... Hurt? And his stomach tie itself into knots. Harry wasn't the type of man that feared many things... But it always takes just a second, one split second when you think everything had been taken away from you, to realize something. And the something that Harry realized tonight was that, although he wasn't in love with Louis, he cared about him. His life wouldn't be the same if the sassy, smart mouthed boy next to him just... Disappeared. Leaving Harry alone with this vacancy that he didn't think anybody would ever feel, one he hadn't realized had he even had prior to meeting Louis.
It wasn't a vacancy that needed to be filled with love, but rather... Acceptance? Louis may hate Harry, and deny what Harry was assuming without a second thought, but Harry knew on some deep level, Louis accepted him for who he was. Harry had given him a chance to leave, yet Louis didn't, and that shocked Harry. Nobody has ever stuck around him without benefiting from it somehow. But Louis... He got nothing but pain, embarrassment, and near death experiences when staying with Harry.
Louis was exhausted. He was pregnant, which already tired him out. But because of the events that happened today it made him even more tired. He ended up laying his head on Harry's lap in the car, letting out a yawn. He looked up at Harry, his blue eyes innocent and a little cloudy from his tiredness. He snuggled into Harry's lap and closed his eyes, falling asleep for the whole car ride.
Once Harry was sure Louis was in a deep sleep, he lifted his good arm up and threaded his fingers through Louis' hair, letting the simple task relax him. He had never realized how soft Louis' hair really was. It felt... Like he was sticking his hand in a pile of feathers. Smiling softly to himself, Harry looked down at the sleeping boy in his lap. Louis looked so peaceful, his thick eyelashes fanned across his cheeks and his lips slightly parted. It was a sight that Harry admired while he could. He locked the image in his head, remembering every small detail so when he was in the middle of a fight with Louis, he could recall what he looked like asleep... With his mouth shut and no damn words flying out of it that would piss Harry off.
Louis slept peacefully, having random dreams inside his head, different moments from his life replaying. This happened often. Past memories from his life would play in his head and it was relaxing. They were always good memories. Then Harry showed up, the few good memories he had. He smiled in his sleep, cuddling closer into Harry's lap. His eyes fluttered open when the car stopped. He stayed still, feeling Harry's fingers in his hair, which felt amazing. He didn't want it to stop. He knew Harry was a good person, he just needed help realizing it himself.
Harry was staring out the window, lost in his own mind. He didn't realize the car had stopped, or that Louis was awake until his door was opened and a man appeared. "Mr. Styles. Dr. Link is here," Tom said, quickly averting his gaze to the back of Harry's seat when he realized he had interrupted what appeared to be an intimate moment.
Harry cleared his throat and nodded, reluctantly removing his hand from Louis' hair. He looked down and was preparing himself to shake Louis awake when he seen sleepy blue eyes staring up at him. "Sorry if we woke you," Harry said, now suddenly uncomfortable. He shifted in his seat, the movement shifting Louis' head so it was now resting on his thigh. "We have arrived home. If you'd like, one of my men can carry you to bed?" Harry asked, motioning for Tom to grab Louis before the boy had even responded.
Louis smiled at Harry. "Like when you stroke my hair." Louis hummed and cuddled into Tom's chest when he was lifted. He was in a cuddly mood right now. It was most likely because he was tired. "You didn't wake me. I woke up and I'm glad I did." He hummed. "Hopefully the doctor doesn't hurt you too bad when he takes the bullet out." He said and rested his head on Tom's shoulder. "We're going to talk after a little bit right?"
Harry climbed out as well and as soon as the door was shut, the car drove away. "If you are still awake, yes," Harry said with a nod. He chose to ignore the ten men that was hovering a few feet away from them as they made their way up to the door. Harry opened it, allowed Tom to enter, then walked in behind him and grinned when he seen the familiar man standing in his foyer.
"Adam!" Harry greeted the man cheerfully, pulling him into a hug. "It's been too long," Harry said, obviously knowing that that was a good thing, but he missed the man. And taking your doctor out to lunch or some other social event wasn't exactly accepted, so Harry rarely got to see him lately.
Louis pouted. "I will be awake. I'll wait for you." Louis said and sighed, watching as Harry walked inside and went to the doctor.
Adam smiled at Harry and hugged back. "It really has man. It sucks that it has to be like this, but it's good to see you. Got a bullet to the shoulder, eh Styles? Figured it would happen at some point." He said and opened his bag to get out the supplies he would need
Harry grinned and shook his head. "I believe owe you a trip," he said as he unbuttoned his suit jacket and carefully took it off, followed by his shirt. At the curious look that was shot in Harry's direction over Adam's shoulder, Harry sighed and walked over to stand next to him. "Surely your memory can't be that bad, mate. When I came to you after the stabbing incident, you told me that you wouldn't doubt that one day I would come to you with a bullet in my shoulder. I bet you otherwise and well, here we are," Harry pointed towards his shoulder and laughed, then set down on a chair that had been pulled up next to the table Adam was setting up at.
Adam sighed. "Well, I am getting old aren't I? Heard you're going to be a father though. Congratulations. I know it's something you've wanted for a long time. I'm glad it's finally happening for you." He said as he cleaned Harry's wound before numbing the area. He reached over to the table and grabbed his scalpel, applying two small cuts on the top and bottom to open the wound a little more so he didn't risk causing more damage. He grabbed a pair of tweezers and carefully pulled out the bullet and began stitching up the wound. "How are you and Louis by the way? Is he good?" He asked, just trying to make some general conversation.
Harry stayed as still as he could, still feeling pressure and minor pain even though he had been numb. When he heard the bullet clank in the tiny metal dish Adam had set on the table, Harry looked over at it. It was small, and had blood covering it. It was strange for him to think that that was once in his body. "He's good. He's always testing my patients though, but good." Harry said, sighing quietly. Adam was a good friend, but Harry didn't want to tell him about his personal problems. "How's Jennika, though? Is she good? And how are your kids?"
Adam hummed. "That's good. I'm sure he's still getting adjusted to all of this. Sometimes it takes a while. And she's good, we're doing really good. The kids are driving us slightly insane but we're doing good overall." He said and finished stitching him up. "I miss talking to you man, you're a really great friend." Adam said as he began putting his stuff away. "Don't worry about Louis, I'm sure that it will all work out." Adam said. "Anything else you need me for?"
Harry considered Adam to be a wise man, so he was hoping what he was saying would come true. He didn't know if he could stay nice much longer when Louis acted the way he did, constantly pushing every single one of Harry's buttons. Harry shook his head and stood up, glancing down at his shoulder that now had white gauze over it, held tightly to his skin with surgical tape. "I'm good, thank you though," he said, smiling and shaking Adam's hand. "We will have to get together some time, when I don't need your medical expertise," Harry joked, but he was completely serious. He didn't care any longer if him talking to his doctor outside of his medical emergencies was frowned upon. He missed the man. "I will transfer enough money over to your account to cover tonight, the trip I owe you, and a nanny,"
Adam smiled. "Of course. Anytime. We definitely will. Maybe sometime both our families could get together. I think it could be fun." Adam said and stood up, shaking Harry's hand. "You really didn't have to do that man, but I really appreciate it. You'll always be my favorite patient." He grinned. "Bye, see you soon." He said and walked out of the house.
Louis came down the stairs. He had been waiting at the top of them for the doctor to leave. He sat down on the couch and looked up at Harry, biting his lip. "How are you feeling?" He asked, looking at the bandage.
Harry shrugged, an action proving to be stupid when a dull ache began, only increasing with every heartbeat. He clenched his teeth, to keep from making any type of noise, and inhaled sharply. "I am fine," he said, counting to ten with his eyes closed before he opened them, smiled, and went to sit down on the couch opposite of Louis, placing his feet up as soon as the couch formed around his aching spine.
Louis frowned. "You don't look fine. You look like you're in pain." Louis said and looked at him. "Are you sure there's no pain killers you want to take? I could go get them for you." Louis said. He just wanted to be helpful and take care of Harry. He hoped that somehow, doing nice things and talking to him more would slowly but surely cause Harry to open up to him.
Harry waved him off and shook his head. "No," he answered simply. He didn't like the way pain meds made his head fuzzy or how he acted while on them. He didn't like doing drugs either, but he didn't care to tell Louis that. He wouldn't want to ruin Louis' view of him.
Deciding to get straight to the point before he got ready to leave with Tom, Harry sighed and propped his elbow on the arm of the couch so he could rest his chin in it, his pointer finger rubbing against his bottom lip as he stared at Louis. The boy appeared fine. "The day after our wedding, with the serving boy. Do you now understand why I acted the way I did? When I say that my life is in constant danger I do not say it just for the hell of it. I say it because it is true, and now that you are married to me, you will constantly be in the public's eye, and although you have done nothing wrong, you will be judged for my choices. People will target you too, and you need to understand that being careless with who we allow access to our rooms, will end in not only mine, but your death too," Harry said, his face void of any emotion, any key sign that he truly was worried.
He was backing off, not showing Louis any sort of affection when he was awake, or speaking to him for that matter. They have spoke more words in the past four hours, then they have in the past fourteen days, and Harry wasn't sure he was ready to deal with it again. He was just calming down from their last fight, repairing the so little Louis damaged in his mind. He was in a recovery state, and he knew if Louis pried too much, and Harry listened, he would eventually spill everything to save himself from the pain of trying to hold it in, of his innermost feelings that have been buried for so long, going to war against the dead man he is now.
It was a war he didn't want to happen, but knew eventually would. And he was terrified to see which would truly win in such a fight.
Louis looked at Harry and listened to him speak. "I understand now. I didn't at first but now I do. And I'm sorry for not understanding until now." Louis said and looked down at his hands. "I just wanted to do something nice that day and I guess I wasn't thinking clearly." Louis shrugged. "But I still want to talk to you about us." Louis said looking at him. "We're both not mentally stable. In different ways. And two mentally unstable people raising a child is not going to work. It's not. I realize that it's not just you who needs help. I do too. And this is what I propose." Louis began.
"I will see a therapist. The lady or man can come here or we can go to them. You will also see a therapist. And then we will see a counselor together for our relationship. I think it could really help and I know overall that our baby will be happier and healthier."
Harry looked... The only true way to describe it was a man who looked as if he was in pain, displeased, and amused all at the same time. The way his face was twisted with so many different emotions looked strange, but he couldn't pick just one. A couples therapy group, as well as couples counseling? Ha! Harry would be caught dead before he hired one of those morons to shuffle through his brain like a deck of card, picking and choosing which card he thought was best. Harry didn't have any good cards, anyway, so it was useless.
"You can go to therapy, and see a counselor for the both of us, then tell me how it is. I will not sit in a room with a person just so they can criticize me about who I am, and pick me apart like I'm a loaf of bread. I am perfectly fine the way I am, so no thank you," he said, face finally deciding to relax on displeased. He wasn't going to do it, no matter what Louis said or did.
Louis frowned. "That's not what they're going to do. They're going to help you. They're not going to force you to change. They're going to help you and us. Because if you don't I don't think we can have this baby." Louis said honestly. "I thought you would love your unborn child enough to get help. And I know you think that it's wrong for me to question the love you feel for the child, but you're making it really hard not to."
"Because I won't see a damn therapist!?" Harry shouted incredulous. How was him choosing not to see a therapist proving he wouldn't love his child! This was ridiculous. "If you think me sitting in a room with some quack as they pick through my brain and make me tell them that I see a bunny on the ink splat, then fine! I will go to one meeting, one meeting, and if I do not like it, then I will not continue. No negotiating." This child has yet to be born and it was already making Harry do things he would never have done before. It better know that Harry really does love it.
"Fine. But you're going to hurt your child by not changing. You're going to end up acting like your dad without even realizing it." Louis snapped at him and got up, going upstairs. "Let me know when you want to care about this child." Louis said and went into a spare bedroom, slamming the door shut.
"When the fuck are you going to change?" Harry shouted, quickly chasing after him. His shoulder was momentarily forgotten as he pounded on the locked bedroom door. "You are a narcissist asshole! You enjoy saying things to me you know will hit a nerve, yet you have the audacity to call me the fucked up one and say that I will hurt our child by not changing. But what about you? What happens if the child does something you do not like? Will you take its fear of monsters in the closet and tell it that if it does not behave, it will be taken away? Or that because it acted out, you can not love it? You are a contradicting shit who only cares to see others faults, while hiding behind this innocent persona so you do not have to face your own."
"No! Because I'm actually willing to go get help unlike some selfish asshole like yourself! I actually worry about my children unlike you! So maybe you should change before I leave your ass and keep this baby away from you!" Louis yelled and opened the door. "I'm going to get help. But you're not going to! Because you think you're fine when you're not!"
Harry grabbed Louis by the other arm and flipped them so he was pressed against the walls, his arms pinned above his head with one of Harry's hands holding it there. "Keep threatening me with my child, and I swear to god I will have you locked up and diagnosed as clinically insane and unfit to be a parent." Harry growled. He meant it. He had always wanted a child, yet the thing was being used against him every chance Louis got. He was no better than the people Harry was constantly hiding him true self from. Louis was taking what he knew would hurt Harry, and using it against him. Which left Harry wondering if he should start hiding from Louis? Just showing up when necessary for public appearances, but ultimately leaving Louis locked up in this home while Harry moved somewhere else, somewhere he didn't feel like he was being attacked in his own home.
And Harry knew he was far from fine, but that didn't meant he wanted some strangers help. He had lived a perfect enough life for eighteen years being the way he is, so why change now? The fun in his life was just truly beginning. He was looked at with respect his younger self didn't get, and his business' were blowing up, so why change something that, in his eyes, didn't need fixing? He was the main source of all the problems, yes, but his problems lead him to be the most successful businessmen in the UK.
Louis squirmed. "It's not your child! It's our child! And I'm carrying our child! And you can't do that. It's our baby!" Louis yelled. "If you always have wanted a child why don't you start acting like a father. Read the books! Take care of me! Talk to me about changing and helping the baby! You do realize that this isn't good for the baby right? But I don't think you really care!"
Harry grinned and tightened his hold on Louis' wrist, his sore arm hanging loosely by his side. "Try me. Who will question Harry Styles when he says his wife is insane? Only the people with death wishes would, that's who, and my darling, I fear there is not many who would risk their lives to prove something that does not affect them," Harry said, sounding like a true mad man. "Do you think I care that you are carrying 'our' child. That is all that you are doing. Once it is viable enough to be born, you will be of no use to me, so do not think otherwise," Harry shoved his hips forward and further pinned Louis in place, but he made sure not to apply too much pressure because of the child. See, he is a good father.
Nosing at his neck, Harry grinned at the smooth skin there. "Act like a father to whom? The child that is still the size of a pea, who has no proper brain function right now? Or to you? Do you want daddy to spank your bum when you act out, and make you feel like I care? Hmm?" Harry hummed and licked a small line up Louis' neck, then clasped his teeth around the skin just beneath Louis' jaw, sucking a little harsher than necessary.
Louis cried out and whimpered. "You wouldn't do that to me. To our child. Our child needs a mother." Louis said and looked at Harry. "And when the child starts to ask about me and you tell them you sent me away. They'll hate you. I know they will." Louis said and began to cry. "You do care about me. I know you do. You just won't admit it." Louis whimpered and squirmed underneath his grip. "Let go. I don't want this. Let go." Louis whimpered, cringing as Harry licked his neck and sucked on his jaw. He cried harder and whimpered. "Stop."
Harry pulled back as soon as Louis told him to stop, letting the boys arms free, and smirked. "Do not mistake my kindness for anything but what it is. I do not care for you, and if you continue acting the way you are, and continue threatening me, you will see exactly what I will do, regardless of how the child will feel about it in the future." And with that said, Harry turned around and left. He walked down the doors and went straight outside, then b-lined across his lawn and went to the large guest house in his backyard, which is where his men that need a break will rest.
"Get up off your arses and let's go!" Harry shouted to the men who were sitting around the table, laughing about something as they ate. As soon as they realized Harry was there, they quickly scrambled to their feet and stood up straight, eyes focused on nothing but staring straight ahead. "Yes sir!" They all said in unison. Forming a diamond around Harry, they led him back outside and to his car, where a new button up shirt was waiting for him as well as his cell-phone.
"You do! And you're going to be real sorry when you finally realize it and I feel nothing for you!" Louis yelled. "Don't you dare touch me or my child every again!" Louis yelled and slammed the door shut after Harry left, curling up in bed. He sobbed into the pillow. He needed to get out of here. He needed to leave and be with his mum. He hated this. He hated living with Harry. It was hell, all the time. Some days were good, others were horrible. Maybe he could just hope Harry would see the light and change.. some how.