Uncle Desmond asked me to dance so I danced with him. My body was stiff and my head was spinning since I couldn't stop thinking about Logan. He worried me to extents that I never knew I possessed- the care, the protection, the love for him was overflowing my boundaries. All I wanted was to run into his arms even when he confused the hell out of me.
But as Uncle Desmond whirled me around, my anxiety started to dissolve slowly. The music calmed my nerves and I found myself focus on his smiling, wrinkly face. He asked me over the booming of the song, "What's the matter with the lad?"
"Do you mean Logan?" My forehead creased as his smile only widened. "How did you know?"
"That look of despair, I have seen it a million times on young faces like yours," he said wisely.
I was partly awed as I nodded. "It is him . . . Well, he's acting strange and I don't like it. He's never been so ambiguous since t-the early days. He shares everything with me, but now I don't know what's bothering him. Did I do something wrong?"
"No dear, don't assume things. It'll only lead to a life time of hidden grudges until both of you start resenting each other even before the honeymoon phase is over. And certainly don't blame yourself without knowing the actual reason, it'll make your man easier to exploit you," he said, laughing. "He'll come around eventually. In fact," he paused and glanced behind me. "The lad is already here."
I surreptitiously took a glimpse of Logan who upon seeing me move, quickly stepped back into the darkness of the corner.
Uncle Desmond winked at me, spinning me around for a final time before letting me go.
I was about to leave the dance floor and manoeuvre through the crowd- towards Logan when Kevin from my former school asked me to dance with him. I didn't accept because he was insanely good looking or because he didn't ask other healthier and prettier girls than me. I didn't accept because I had a teeny-tiny crush on him back in seventh grade. I accepted because I was being polite.
"Shall we start the pity dance?" I jested and he laughed, his eyes crinkling.
"If pity is what I'm giving, I would have asked those wallflowers to dance," he pointed out, taking my hand and leading me to the centre. "Is that an awful thing to say?"
"Yes." I cackled with laughter and he smirked, pleased with making me laugh. I took a moment to study his profile- caramel coloured skin, shiny black hair and eyes and a sharp jaw which could slice people in half. Funny how I had a crush on him back then and thought my 'type' were men like him when Logan was completely different with light skin and eyes. "How are you Kevin? Didn't see you since . . . "
"Two years. I had gone to my hometown," he said and with ease, grabbed my waist. "How are you JJ?"
"Uh . . . I'm good, really happy these days."
He nodded, smiling and suddenly spun me around, leaving me giggling.
"This town hasn't changed in two years . . . Same people, same smiles, same warm welcomes. What's changed with you JJ?"
"A lot." Noticing his curious expression, I elaborated, "I have cancer---"
"Oh yeah, yeah, yeah."
"---and there's no cure. It's only getting worse, but I'm fine with it. I have accepted my fate and now I'm in a state where I'm enjoying each tiny moment. Also, I have a boyfriend so yay," I said lamely.
Kevin smiled dolorously. "Who's this lucky guy?"
I turned around to the corner where Logan previously stood and our eyes met from across the room. Even in the dark, I could make out his blazing gaze travelling from my body and then to Kevin. He shook his head sardonically and started marching towards the exit.
"You should go," Kevin's voice was only a whisper as I threw him a grateful look and rushed after Logan.
Logan's long legs had already carried him to the street and with my last ounce of energy, I clutched his shirt and yanked him backwards.
"What the hell is going on? I fricking don't get it! Why are we arguing?" I demanded flippantly and Logan snickered, infuriating me further. I pushed him harshly, but he didn't budge which added to my anger. "Is this because I twirled you huh? Is that why you don't feel like a macho man? Is this why you're behaving like an asshole?"
He didn't say anything, only watched me which tripled my rage.
I grasped his collar and pulled him to my level so we were eye-to-eye. "How do you even define a man? Does it depends solely on his strength? On how hard he can hit someone or how hard of a blow he can take? Does it depends on the size of his bulky arms or the size of his little dick?"
For a moment, Logan looked horrified as he slipped out of my grip, not expecting the truth to tumble out of my innocent mouth.
I continued fiercly, "What is it Logan? Everyday I have told you you're strong, neither to assure you nor to put bandage over your wounds. I said that because you are strong and I don't know how twirling you took away your virility. Being a man and being strong are two seperate things, we both know that. And we know this quarrel we're having is petty and pointless."
"I didn't mean to say that . . . I-I fucking don't know why I said that," he admitted in frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I'm fine now, leave me alone. You can go back to flirting with that bastard."
"What? Kevin and I weren't flirting! We were dancing like any other couple who are just friends!"
*
Third person's POV [Logan's POV]
Just friends. Logan almost snorted at that. The way that scumbag held his Joy close to him almost crushing her to his chest wasn't just friends. He said dryly, "Sure."
Joy's wide eyes held a storm which intensified at his one word reply. "What do you mean 'sure'? Don't you believe me when I say we're only friends? Even if you don't believe me, can't you see from your own stupid eyes? I'm as desirable as an old, branch, my leftover beauty was peeled away ages ago. You were dumb enough to fall in love with me, but---"
"Shush . . . " Logan placed his finger over her soft lips, but Joy tottered back.
"No! Don't you dare shush me when I'm talking! You listen what I'm saying and get this clear in your shithead, I fell in love with you dummy. I love you and miraculously, you love me back. You gave me a love I so longed for and now you can't take it back! You can't!" she yelled furiously, a slight tremor in her voice which made Logan shiver.
Goddamn, if only she could see how beautiful she was . . .
Joy wasn't pretty or healthy looking, she was pale as if her one foot was in the grave already. But she was beautiful in her own way, not only to his eyes but to everyone's eyes except her own. Round blue eyes like a clean sky and a child like smile which made his heart break knowing that it would vanish soon.
Her chest was heaving up and down and her blonde hair was disheveled in a cute mess on top of her head. All Logan wanted to do was pull her against him and kiss her hard and fast and steal her breath away. He wanted to sink his hands in her hair and murmur how lovely she was until she grew tired of hearing. So that was what Logan did.
Joy protested weakly before finally surrendering to his deep kisses. Logan felt her every curve and edge as he kissed her with a flaming passion. With Joy, it was always a slow burn until it escalated to a stage where both of them were exploding with a hungry need.
He pulled away, letting her breathe and giving some time for himself to calm down.
"I . . . You . . . " She was at a loss for words and Logan smiled smugly, knowing that he had affected her to that extent. "Does this-this mean you aren't mad at me?"
"I was never mad at you . . . " he mumbled guiltily. It was wrong of him to take out his personal wrath on her, so wrong. "I'm sorry."
Before she could ask anything, he gathered her in his arms and told her how sorry he was and how much he loved her. It was the only option he had for he couldn't tell her the truth. The weight of his phone grew heavy in his pocket . . . How could he tell her that his fucking obsessive uncle had sent him a message-
After all the time and money I spent on you, I hope you're not under the impression that I forgot about my favourite nephew.
Sincerely,
Your dearest uncle.