Nathan
Everything was so messed up, once again something happened which prevented me from doing what I wanted to do. Once again all that I had planned was ruined. I knew I didn't have any choice but to lie when I agreed to what Rachel had told me, but I didn't expect to lie to this extent.
I had forgotten about our parents, and now that the three of them know about it I had no idea how to get out of this mess. Now that they know, they'd expect more from us, possibly marriage.
I thought I could handle my parents, I would have just told them some lie and they would believe me, Jessie's father on the other hand is a very different matter. Jessie has been raised without a mother, so Mr King is definitely sensitive and cautious about anything regarding her.
Now that he knows there's less chance for me to get out of this relationship. It would be very difficult to find an excuse to break up with Jessie.
"Nathan, are you alright?" Jessie's gentle voice interrupted my chain of thoughts. We were in my car driving back home. I wasn't actually in the mood for anything, in fact I wanted to be left alone. I needed time to think and I needed to think and assess all the things happening in my life once again.
"I'm fine." I mumbled without looking at Jessie.
"Are you sure?" Putting her hand on my hand which was on the gear.
"Yeah." I said, still not looking at her and not reacting to her touch which felt very warm and relaxing.
"Well... I'm here for you if you needed me. Okay?" Jessie offered, her voice gentle as ever. I stared at her finally to find her looking very concerned and worried.
Her makeup was lighter than before, which showed her normal features looking so much better now.
Seeing her like this: very caring, worried, and looking very stunning got me wondering why all those stupid guys rejected her...
And how the hell I haven't noticed that she's this beautiful?
"Okay Jess. Don't worry about me." I said and smiled at her genuinely.
"I'm sorry for telling my father-" She started but I shook my head and interrupted her.
"There's no need to be sorry. He's your father, he has every right to know." I said, meaning every word which came out of my mouth.
Who am I to control someone's life anyways? I thought as I parked my car and waited for Jessie to get out.
"Aren't you coming in?" She asked.
"I have somewhere to go." I muttered.
"Oh..." Jessie mumbled, as she frowned looking rather disappointed.
"Do you need anything?" I asked, staring at Jessie.
"No." She replied a little harshly and reached for the door handle.
"Hey! Hey, Jessie! What's wrong?" I said as I gently grabbed her arm.
"Wh-what do you mean? I'm fine!" She kind of squeaked, looking at everywhere and everything but at me. I sighed and reached for her face, grabbing her chin and making her to look at me.
"Has anyone ever told you how much you're bad at lying?" I whispered, resting my hands on each side of her face. "Tell me why do you look so disappointed in me. Do you want to come with me?"
"No," Jessie said, still frowning.
"Then tell me what's wrong." I demanded.
"I...I...uh..." Jessie stuttered, her mouth closing and opening multiple times while we stared at each other for a few seconds.
"Tell me." I repeated. Jessie closed her eyes for a moment, took a deep breath, then she opened her eyes and stared into my eyes, as if she's searching for deep secrets. I swallowed the lump in my throat and stared into her beautiful green eyes.
"It's...been nearly a month since we're together." She whispered. I knew what she meant. In fact there were only a few things I was aware of at that moment. I was aware of our breathing getting fast, our glances that held so much meaning and my body hairs standing upright.
I don't know who started it, and truth be told I don't care, all I know we were kissing like two lovers who have seen each other again after so many long boring years. I closed my eyes and and forgot about all the other feelings. I only felt Jessie being close to me, and it was like I could feel all her flaws and sadness and dreams through our kiss. I think Jessie felt mine too, because she was gripping my hands so tight they hurt. Truth be told I didn't want our secret sharing to end.
"You still want to go?" Jessie asked, panting for breath.
I grinned and gave her a peck on her nose."I think it's more important to stay." She smiled warmly and put her arms around my neck.
"Stay with me tonight, please." She said, staring into my eyes and leaning in for another kiss. I gladly kissed her back and nodded.
"I will. I'll stay with you." I said, making Jessie smile wider. She grabbed my hand after we got out of the car and led me to her apartment. She went to her room to change while I went to the kitchen to prepare coffee for us. I walked to her room with cups in hands and called Jessie's name.
"Nice pajamas!"I commented the moment she held the door open for me and let me in. She blushed crimson red and grabbed one of the cups.
"Thanks." She mumbled and kissed me on my cheek.
"You're welcome." I chuckled feeling my cheek burn from her lips.
After drinking coffee and talking about nearly everything in our lives, Jessie asked me to cuddle her, so I lay by her side on her bed and put my arms around her waist, pulling her closer to me.
"I think Rachel got what she wanted." I mumbled as Jessie rubbed her thumb on my cheek. She laughed a real genuine laugh which sounded like music to my ears.
"She did," She said," but I also got what I wanted"
I sighed and put my fingers in her long dark hair, stroking it.
"And what's the thing you wanted?" I asked, as I kept stroking her hair.
"You." She replied, I smiled and pinched her cheek. "Ouch!"
"You're who I want too Jessie." I said, feeling weird and light headed for actually saying these words truthfully. I ignored the alarms in my head and kissed her forehead.
"So... you're over Holly?" She asked, biting her lower lip. I smiled and pinched her cheek again. "Ouch! ... Stop it."
"I am completely over her. It's you who I want silly." I said. She smiled and rubbed her own cheek. It was then that the truth hit me. It was then when I realized what I'm doing and how I was denying my feelings. I don't know if it was Jessie's touch or her beautiful green eyes, or the feeling of her soft hair under my touch that seemed like it was intoxicating me. But I knew the truth now. I was deeply in love with Jessie, and I hadn't even realized it.
I didn't know what will happen next, but I knew Jessie deserves to know the truth. Since she's the girl whom I opened my heart for, she deserves the truth.
"Jess..." I mumbled. and swallowed the lump in my throat.
"Hmm..."Jessie mumbled.
"I need to tell you something." I said, still stroking her hair.
"What is it?" Jessie asked, with a small smile playing on her beautiful face, her eyes were twinkling and her breathing was fast, I could only assume her heart was beating even faster than mine. She looked hopeful, happy and relieved. And at that precise moment I didn't want to ruin her day for her. So I sighed and decided to do something about that later. At that moment what mattered was Jessie and nothing else.
"I love you." I said instead, this time it felt right and I was feeling cheerful and comfortable saying it. And this time those three words came from my heart itself. Jessie smiled and put her arms around my neck. Just when she was about to open her mouth to say something I pressed my lips onto hers, not letting her continue what she was about to say. I was not ready to hear her response, at least not now.
Despite the happy night I spent with Jessie, I couldn't sleep. instead I watched Jessie sleeping in my arms nearly all night, I was too busy memorizing her features to fall asleep.