jack gilinsky
"jack.." johnson mutters, sitting me down on his bed. "that's sexual assault. you know that, right?"
"really?"
"yeah, man." he frowns. "..are you alright?"
"it was uncomfortable.." i murmur, staring down at the ground.
"i'm surprised you told me." he admits. "you haven't been telling me a lot, lately."
"i know." i sigh, "and i'm sorry."
"it's fine." he shrugs. "as long as you're at least telling someone."
"i am." i nod. "amara."
he nods with a small smile, "good. she's cool."
"yeah, she is."
"listen," he sits straight up. "you've gotta stop hanging around meredith, alright? i know she can be a nice girl, but you and i both know she doesn't have the best interest for you. she's using you."
i nod, thinking about her. i didn't want to be around her anymore.
"can i tell you something else, too?"
he looks over at me curiously, "yeah. of course, dude."
"you know my brother..rafael."
"yeah. what about him?"
i sigh, looking past him and at the blank wall behind him. "he got in a car accident a few months ago, and he's been in a coma ever since."
+
i took a deep breath, inhaling the aroma of the weed i'd smoked in my bedroom. i exhale, realizing i'm fucked if my grandma smells that, especially since my sister's home too.
i lift myself off of my bed, closing the bag and shoving it underneath my mattress.
i head into our guest bedroom, searching through the multiple drawers. i pull out a bottle of febreeze, holding it out in front of me and deciding whether i should put it to use.
"what are you doing?"
i grimace at her voice, slowing looking over at her. "just uh, looking at some febreeze."
she raises an eyebrow in amusement, "any reason?"
"..nope."
"i can smell it from the kitchen, jack." she informs. "i'm gonna take adrianna to cheesecake factory since she's been asking for it all week. i was gonna ask you to come along, but not while you're like this." she says. "i want the smell gone by the time we come home."
"what if i can't—"
"you can." she calls as she heads down the stairs, eventually closing the front door and leaving me alone.
i decide to test the febreeze, walking into my room and spraying it everywhere.
i scrunch my nose at the weird scent the two smells collided into, shaking my head and tossing the bottle onto my bed.
i decided this would be a good excuse to have amara over, fishing my phone out from my pocket and pulling up our messages.
me -
i need help
amara -
lmao what now?
me -
can you come over??
i knew if i asked her my question, her immediate answer would be to look it up. half of the time, she made me look up formulas while tutoring me. i slowly stopped caring though, and just enjoyed the fact i was with her.
amara -
you're lucky my mom is sleeping
amara -
i'll be over in 5
i bite back a smile, but eventually let my lips spread.
i felt my smile slowly disappear when i look up from my phone, watching as meredith stumbles in though the window. "god.."
"i'm so sorry." she blurts, and i notice the tears running down her face. "i know i did that, and i'm so sorry."
i shake my head, "what are you doing here?"
she takes me by surprise when she wraps her arms around me, falling to my bed and dragging me down with her. she lets out loud sobs into my shoulder, and i awkwardly sit there in her embrace.
"meredith—"
"they're so disappointed in me." she continues to cry. "my mom threw my computer across the room. i have this—" she shows me her hand, a fresh cut going along her palm.
"oh my god." i mutter, standing up. "m-meredith, you need to go to the emergency room." my heart had been racing, and i felt like i couldn't catch my breath. "why would you come here?"
"they all hate me!" she cries. "don't you know that? none of them care about me like you do."
i bite down on my lip, exhaling a shaky breath. she stands, too, stepping towards me and throwing her arms around me once more. "i'm sorry for everything..for being rude, for touching you like that. i'm not okay."
i stand there for a few seconds before wrapping my arms around her comfortingly. "..you'll be okay."
she pulls away for a split second to look at me. she'd never told me about her parents—though i'd suspected it a few months back. plus it was no secret her parents were overly hard on her.
+
"she needs stitches." i answer for meredith, and the nurse raises an eyebrow at me.
"let me see your hand, honey." she inspects her palm, slightly pulling off the makeshift bandage i made for her.
when she brought out the materials, i excused myself into the hall. i could barely stand seeing blood, let alone the process of stitching.
i lean my head against the wall. i'd spent way too much time at this hospital.
a while passed before i was back in the room, staring at the beige wall behind meredith while she kept her eyes on the floor. "thank you..for this."
"it's the least i could do." i murmur, "why didn't you tell me earlier..about your parents?"
"it's not an easy thing to just tell someone." she admits. "everyone thinks of me as the perfect popular girl, though i've never once said i was." she chuckles.
i open my mouth to reply before she speaks again. "i'm sorry..i feel like shit. especially for doing that to you. i couldn't get it out of my head ever since it happened, and i feel disgusting." she covers her face in her hands.
"why did you?"
"i don't want to put all the blame on her..but i felt so attached to gloria." she explains.
"i always thought you were the upper hand in the friendship." i inform, and she shakes her head.
"i sort of was. but something changed this summer." she says. "she's not the same person anymore."
i thought back to derek—his random mood swings or when he'd isolate himself, worse than i would. was she the reason why?
"miss, do you have a guardian here to sign you out?"
meredith sighs at the nurse, "..i'll call."
the nurse gives her a small smile before nodding and leaving the room once more.
"you gonna call your parents?"
"no." she murmurs. "i'm gonna call my sister."
my phone rings, and i look down at another missed call from my grandma. "go, jack." she says, and i look up at her.
"no..it's fine—"
"i'll be okay." she assures. "go home, okay? thank you for everything."
i sigh with defeat, standing up. "alright..i'll text you in the morning."
she gives me a weak smile, "okay. see you around."
i nod, giving her one last glance before leaving the room.
as i drove home, i thought about meredith again. i also thought about derek, and how they were both hurting in front of me and i barely noticed it.
i take a breath before going inside the house. i knew my grandmother was still awake, given the light being on in her room.
she'd been seated on the first step of the stairs, looking up at me with an emotionless expression. "welcome back."
"i'm sorry.." i apologize. "my friend got hurt and i took her to the hospital—" i swallow the large lump forming in my throat, blinking slowly and feeling myself tear up. "i'm sorry."
she stares at me for a few seconds, letting out a small sigh and slightly throwing her hands in the air. "i never thought it'd be easier to take care of adrianna than to take care of you." she informs. "..you're all over the place, jack."
i felt at loss for words as she turns to head upstairs. "i'm sorry. please don't be mad."
"i'm not. i'm just tired."
when she reaches the top of the stairs, i follow her up. "please—" she closes her door before i could go on, and i grit my teeth.
i was about to turn to head into my room before my eyes catch adrianna's, who'd been peeking out of her room. "go to sleep, anna."
she steps out and towards me. "she's not mad." she informs. "she's just sad."
i furrow my eyebrows, "why?"
"daddy called and told her they're moving raf." she informs. "out of the country."
***
currently procrastinating on homework (: let me know how you guys like this chapter.