Dear hope,
I wasn't doing any better than last time while I sat on my bed with a cup of coffee and my diary and wrote my feelings on it. I don't know what i'll do if someone ever reads what's in this diary because it contains my unexpressed feelings, the words I've always wanted to say but never got the chance to, things i've always wanted to do but never did. It was like my other half, this diary.
Then, I thought about that saying and it went something like, things get better in the end, and if it doesn't its not the end or something along those lines and I thought to myself; what end are they talking about because the end is when you die, when you take your last breath, that's the end and thats just the end of your life because everyone else is still living but you're not. Everyone else still gets to wake up in the morning and they still get to breathe in the air, but it's only you who doesn't because it was your end. So why do people say it gets better at the end because there is no end, your end is when you're dead, so nothing gets better at the end, it's the opposite.
All our lives, we're thought that things get better, better than what they are in that moment, but they never really do, and people say everything will be okay, but in reality, nothing is ever okay, we always have some sort of problem we deal with and we're never really problem-free. We get stronger, yes, as we deal with our situations we manage to get stronger, stronger than we were before, nothing ever gets better, we just learn to deal with it differently. I think what matters the most is that you get stronger as time goes by.
We're always judging people, from how they dress to what they say, we're always judging and its facsinating how we don't even realize it and I judged you, from the first time I saw you til the last.
I wanted so badly to just forget about everything and I wanted so badly for you to be here with me right now but we never get what we want and I hated it so badly, because all I wanted was you.
Love,
Noel
Sorry guys, this is like a filler and I typed this in 10 mins bc im packing and I wanted to update before I leave!
I hope you like this and DONT FORGET TO VOTE AND COMMENT! it would mean a lott!!
lov u thank you for reading this!