" i like him...not you. sorry."
gazzy
i wasn't even excited for my date with kumitrees tonight.
i don't know what it was. metri is cute, tall, he's on the football team, and he even makes music, but yet, i would actually rather watch paint dry than to go on this date.
"so you're still going on that date with kimetrius from the football team?" billie asked me. billie was a freshman girl who sat next to me in my history class, who was moreso one of diego's friends than mine. they were only friends because everybody told them they looked alike all the time.
"yeah, i can't wait." i replied, not even sounding convincing whatsoever.
"you sound about as excited for that date as i am for my period," she replied, her voice dry
"wait, you like getting your period? never met a girl who-"
"it was sarcasm," she replied with a laugh. "i can't believe you're getting a chance to go on a date with one of the hottest guys in school and you don't want to, might as well pass him to someone who wants him."
confusion clouded my eyes. "wait, you want him? i thought you were gay? what happened to danielle? did you try to put a spider up her pussy or some shit?"
"shut up, i ate a spider once," she put an emphasis on once, as if that shit was normal either way, "and no, i don't want him, but i know someone who would love to be in your shoes right now."
i was about to ask who she was talking about, but then the bell rang, signalling that it was time to change classes.
"talk to you later," i waved, before grabbing my books and beginning to travel to my locker.
as i walked through the halls, i soon felt myself being shoved to the ground from behind, sending me flying onto the floor.
"move outta my way you faggot ass nigga," i heard the familiar voice of one of my bullies.
i got off the floor as people laughed at the situation, my body aching from the fall. "tay, can you leave me alone today?"
he smacked his crusty ass lips. "nah, ain't no leave me alone." he shoved me again, not as hard as the second time, but enough to knock my books out of my hands again. "you don't need no damn books, your retarded ass can't even read that shit."
a bunch of people laughed at the scene as tay continued to harass me. this was a normal occurance for me. i got bullied constantly, for my sexuality and for the fact that apparently i'm "slow" and "retarded", which i'm not.
it never really went beyond calling me a faggot and pushing me around sometimes, which was still annoying.
they also made sure to do it while i was alone, because they knew that jahseh doesn't play that shit and he would beat the fuck out of a nigga for me. i appreciated it, because he was a real ass friend, but i also felt pathetic that i needed jahseh to fight my battles for me.
but what could i do but just take it? nothing. if i fought back, i'd get my ass beat.
at least i only had a couple more weeks left of school. sure, that'd mean dealing with omar's ogre built ass all day, but he was miles better than the bullies at school.
×××××
this was the most boring date i've ever been on in my entire life.
me and kumitrees had nothing in common. absolutely nothing. i liked soccer, he liked football. he was popular, i wasn't. he liked horror movies, i hated them, i liked going to the beach, he was scared of sharks.
honestly, if it wasn't for all the pasta, i would have left this date ages ago.
"so kumitrees..."
"it's kimetrius," he corrected me for like the 10th time that night
"anyways, kumitrees... what do you do in your free time?" i asked before shoving a forkfull of pasta in my mouth.
"i just told you, i play football, duh."
does he have a personality besides football?
billie was right, we weren't going to go on any second dates after this, that's for sure.
it's no offense to metri, because he's a nice guy, and he's cute, but for some reason i just couldn't bring myself to be interested in him.
the rest of the dinner consisted of us having awkward conversations while we ate our food, and suddenly i wished i would have just stayed at the house tonight.
but at least i got pasta out of it, so that's a win.
during the ride home, it was just as awkward, neither of us said anything, and we just listened to whatever was on the radio, aka in my feelings by drake for the 5000th time. no, keke don't love your ass.
when he stopped in front of the house, he turned off the radio and turned to me.
"gazzy...i have to tell you something. and you might get mad but i can't lead you on like this i'm sorry."
now i was confused. leading me on? what was he talking about?
"what do you mean by leading me on? what, was it a dare from your friends to get you to take me out just to set me up or something?" i asked.
"no! no. nothing like that," he assured me, "but you know, your friend diego?"
"yeah...what about him?"
"well see...i like him. not you. i'm sorry. i asked you out because i was too scared to ask him so i asked for the next best thing, and i realize what a shitty thing that is to do so i'm coming clean. i'm sorry gazzy."
if i actually liked him, i would have been upset, but honestly? i was glad. at least he wouldn't be on my tip anymore, and i wouldnt have to feel bad that i didnt like him, because he doesn't like me.
"it's fine," i responded. "i'm not upset."
"so...can you give diego my number for me? you don't have to but i'd really like it if you did."
"sure. i'll give diego your number. i hope things between you two work out."
and then everything clicked. diego likes him too. that's why he suddenly got upset when i said i was going on a date with him, and that's why billie tried to talk me out of going on the date - she was trying to get her best friend some dick instead of me.
at least one of my friends was about to get some dick. can't relate.
i made my way inside of the house, and into the living room. there was omar and some chubby nigga with a blue durag sitting on the couches, watching a movie.
i ignored them and went to the room to change into something more comfortable - a pair of black booty shorts and an oversized black sweater. it had to be omar's, but it was too clean to be his. weird.
i was about to just sit in bed and text jahseh about how terrible of a date that was, but for some reason, my instincts lead me downstairs to go watch that movie with omar and his friend.
i walked back into the living room after i changed and i sat on the couch, right in between musty and mustier.
"oh hey y'all, what y'all watching?" i asked.
"none of your business," omar growled at me.
his dog ass would be out here growling at people.
"aw, don't be like that," his friend piped up. "this must be gazzy, huh?"
oh? so he talks about me to his friends?
"yep, this is gazzy's irritating ass, did i already tell you how he locked me out the other day, i choked the fuck out of him."
"and i liked that shit," i giggled "you should do it again papi."
his friend looked uncomfortable and changed the subject. straight men are annoying. "oh, hey gazzy. i'm stokeley."
"stockly? do you know jahseh?" i asked him.
"...yeah. he's my b-b-best friend," he stuttered. "how do you know him?"
"actually, stockly, he's my best friend. he talks about you all the time though." i replied.
"no, he's my best friend. we shared a cell. it don't get more close than that," he insisted.
"okay stockly, whatever you say," i smirked at him.
"see what i mean? he's fucking annoying." omar added, "and is that my shirt?"
"it might be," i said as i tugged on the hem of the giant black shirt.
"i was just going to say you look nice in it, that's all." he replied, "and you smell really good."
well, i didn't expect that.
my cheeks instantly heated up, a crimson color coloring my face as i smiled at his words. "oh uh, t-th-thank you."
after that, i couldn't look at him for the rest of the night without blushing. who knew that just one simple compliment would make me go crazy like this.
i knew he was fine, but does he really have this effect on me?